Contemporary: how slow is too slow?

[Windcutter]

Warning: stupid post ahead.

I got totally stuck with Project D, so I decided to take a breather and work on my contemporary/psy thriller for a while. And of course I'm sure it sucks, but moving past the usual creative insecurity--it feels like I'm taking things too slow.

Now before you tell me to go read some contemporary YA.
Here's the thing.

I've read some books that belong to the thriller/mystery type of contemporary: DANGER0US GIRLS, PRETTY LITTLE L1ARS, THE UNNATURAL$, C0NFESSIONS OF A MURDER SUSPECT, HEIST SOCIETY, TEN, TRULY MADLY DEADLY, HYSTERIA, etc.
The list is actually longer, because I like this type.
Their pacing is mostly fast and energetic, with a lot of high-tension external events.

And mine is slower. Granted, it has no heists or police procedure, but still. It's atmospheric, slow, a lot of time spent describing the emotional side of events. Yet's it's not a "true contemporary."

As in:

I've read some books that were what I call true contemporary (without any crossgenre stuff or spec twist or mystery elements, pure drama)--books that had plots like "Anna moves to a new town and makes friends while she's fighting her artist's block after her sister's death." [made it up] They seemed to be mostly about soul-searching, thus, very slow and introspective, often lacking any big events.

So I'm starting to wonder if my story is going to fall through the middle crack: too slow and boring for the lovers of the first type, and too plotty and not introspective and realistic enough for the second group.

I don't want to spoil the whole concept because it's not completely written yet, but the core of the plot is that MC is investigating strange circumstances surrounding a boy she falls for, and there is murder and blackmail and stuff. So the basic structure is closer to the first type. But it's a dreamy, gloomy story. Not a high-octane investigation with chases and fights.

Of course, I could just make it shorter, cut out a lot of words, insert more sound and fury. But well... it's already on the short side. I'm a planner, so I usually have a good idea of the final length, and this time I'll get lucky if I manage to hit 60k. Maybe even 55.

So, if anyone is still with me here =) what do you think?

 

[ellio]

I'm thinking... IM@G1NARY G14LS is very slow, and dreamy but incredibly tense and suspenseful throughout also (although the tension amounts to a crappy ending in my opinion). It's magic realism so it's contemporary with surrealist elements but I do remember that being a slow pace but still a page-turner.

I think most readers will stick with anything if the characterisation is good.

 

[Fuchsia Groan]

I haven't read any of the more plotty books you list (I should!), but this sounds like my psychological thriller. It starts out kind of "thick" and contemporary, tons of voice, then develops more suspense and plot as it goes.

But I haven't even queried that. Better examples: I also thought of Nova Ren Suma: 17 & Gone. It's contemp, it's deep in the MC's head, but there's also a mystery plot. Or Another Little Piece, which has a thrilling opening and then a verrrry slow middle, lots of character development, before veering off in an unexpected direction. (Not complaining, I liked the mix.) Or Tighter.

I think it's normal for mysteries and suspense novels to verge into "literary" territory with lots of character work, at least in adult fiction. Some are action oriented, others psychological, and both have their fans. So I hope that's also true in YA. I see why an action fan might reject a "slow" book, but not why a contemp fan would reject a book with compelling characters that also happens to include a cool mystery, unless that person only enjoys light-hearted contemp fiction.

But. I suspect offering a hook at the opening is key. You can develop your plot and characters very slowly if you start by dangling an exciting lure.

ETA: I know there are "true contemporary" books that are just about coming of age or slow-blooming romance, but a lot of contemporary books (or "literary" books in the adult section) have compelling plots. (Think of big hits like The Secret History. Or House of Leaves, which has me on the edge of my seat.) So a contemp reader might object to lack of character development or to a breakneck pace that makes everything feel like a cheesy cop show. But I can't see anyone ever saying, "This book had too much plot."

 

[DahlELama]

There's certainly room for more literary psychological thrillers - 17 & GONE is certainly one, and next year's WE WERE LIARS by E. Lockhart is another. It's one of those things your writing will have to sell if your pacing won't, so be realistic with yourself about whether your prose is special enough to pull this off. (Which I say not to be insulting, but because I know mine wouldn't be.) Falls under the same "not easy but not impossible" umbrella as most other things do!

 

[lolchemist]

I mean.... is it boring? Then it might be too slow. If it caused you to worry enough to post this, it might be too slow. Remember, most of the stuff you put in the book should further the plot somehow. You can add SOME entertaining puffery (like people LOVE reading about the foods in Harry Potter) but not too much to the point where no one remembers what your point was.

 

[Taylor Kowalski]

What you're describing reminds me a bit of Hannah Moskowitz's stuff, particularly GONE, GONE, GONE and INVINCIBLE SUMMER. I wouldn't say that the slower pace is necessarily bad as long as it's still interesting, you know? If your characters and writing are compelling enough to make the pace feel appropriate, then I don't see a problem.

 

[empther]

Imagine your story as a movie.

Now consider how a great movie keeps your attention. It does it with frequent scene changes.

Gone With The Wind is a good example, but it’s too complicated to discuss in a post. Let’s consider The Sound of Music.

Scene 1 Maria on the mountain
Scene 2 Nuns discuss Maria
Scene 3 Mother abbess sends Maria away
Scene 4 Maria goes to von Trapp house
Scene 5 Maria meets the Captain and kids
Scene 6 Maria has dinner with the Trapp family
Scene 7 Rolf and Liesl at the gazebo
Scene 8 Maria with the kids in her room during the rainstorm
Scene 9 Maria and the kids go to the mountain and she teaches them Do-Re-Mi
Scene 10 The Captain returns with the Baroness
Scene 11 The kids sing The Sound of Music for the Baroness.
Scene 12 The puppet show.
Scene 13 The party suggested by the Baroness
Scene 14 Maria dances with the Captain
Scene 15 The Baroness talks to Maria in Maria’s room.
Scene 16 Maria returns to the abbey

That is just Act 1 of what is really a very simple story, Maria falls in love with the Captain and they have to flee the Nazis, but the script keeps things moving along.

For a young adult novel, have the main character face a long list of problems. Instead of worrying about the story dragging, you’ll wonder how you can fit all the plot into less than five hundred pages. ( Hint: It takes a long time and editing in your mind until you have it all fit together so well you can actually hit the word processor and write it out in a month. )

 

[wampuscat]

I think you can have a story with a lot of soul-searching and internal problems that is still fast paced, just like you can have a story with a ton of external conflict that's super slow. Maybe I'm a weird reader, but I tend to prefer something somewhere in the middle. It's gotta have enough tension that I want to turn the page, but if you stack disaster after disaster after disaster, I tend to get reader fatigue and start skimming to see what happens. I like a little breathing room.

 

[empther]

It's gotta have enough tension that I want to turn the page, but if you stack disaster after disaster after disaster, I tend to get reader fatigue and start skimming to see what happens. I like a little breathing room.

Sounds like Bruce Willis's Die Hard movies. Nothing but action action action.
Who will watch these turkeys a hundred years from now?

In books, there must be a lot of psychology. Readers want to see what makes the main character(s) tick. Why do they do what they do?

 

[Laer Carroll]

I think every book has its own pace. Slow does not necessarily equal boring. It’s like eating. I like to take my time on perfectly cooked food, savoring it.

Also, a lot of interior happenings and social interplay may be the most fascinating reading, when we’re in the mood for it. Don’t stint on that because you’re measuring your book against other books.

Write YOUR book, not someone else’s.

 

[Erin Kelly]

I had a similar problem with my current MS that is on sub with my agent. (Elevator pitch: There's a group of seven teenagers; one is murdered and things spiral out of control). Unfortunately the murder couldn't happen until I set the stage for all kinds of other stuff. That was my dilemma. Not exactly the same as yours, but similar in that my plot needed time for the momentum to build. Here was my experience:

Send first draft to agent. Agent calls and says, "More stuff needs to happen in the beginning! More foreshadowing! More tension! Make us feel really uncomfortable!"

Second draft to agent. Agent calls and says, "More tension! MORE TENSION."

Third draft: "I need to be on the edge of my seat!"

Anyway, you get the idea. After five revisions, it was *finally* read to sub (and it is now a MUCH better book).

Here's the thing, though: The murder still happens in the middle. So nothing really has changed, except that we found ways to amp up the "slow stuff" in the beginning. We made it more atmospheric. Added even darker scenes with lots of foreshadowing (did I mention foreshadowing?!) Built characterization through a good, strong mix of action and introspection (but mostly action).

Just make sure things are happening as you're getting the reader where you want them to go. Like in the earlier Sound of Music outline ... Maria's first conflict is with the abbey, then she has conflict with the ill-behaved children, then with the captain, etc. There's always SOMETHING going on, even if it may not be immediately apparent.

 

[Windcutter]

I'm thinking... IM@G1NARY G14LS is very slow, and dreamy but incredibly tense and suspenseful throughout also (although the tension amounts to a crappy ending in my opinion). It's magic realism so it's contemporary with surrealist elements but I do remember that being a slow pace but still a page-turner.

I've actually read that book.) But didn't mention it as a comparison, because I think it's much more literary than mine.
Very sophisticated.

I think it's normal for mysteries and suspense novels to verge into "literary" territory with lots of character work, at least in adult fiction. Some are action oriented, others psychological, and both have their fans. So I hope that's also true in YA. I see why an action fan might reject a "slow" book, but not why a contemp fan would reject a book with compelling characters that also happens to include a cool mystery, unless that person only enjoys light-hearted contemp fiction.

A friend tells me my issue might be that I'm an action fan myself. So I'm like: come on, you could have put a chase scene here! A fight! Kisses! Another dead body, at least!

A hook, definitely. I remember a thread about contemporary openings--how it's important to make them hook-y even if the plot itself is pretty quiet.

But I can't see anyone ever saying, "This book had too much plot."

I've seen a few GR reviews like that. James Patterson's YA books. Some readers wanted more meat, less plot, saying the book was too fast, packing a lot of story into a few words, so it read more like a screenplay.

There's certainly room for more literary psychological thrillers - 17 & GONE is certainly one, and next year's WE WERE LIARS by E. Lockhart is another. It's one of those things your writing will have to sell if your pacing won't, so be realistic with yourself about whether your prose is special enough to pull this off. (Which I say not to be insulting, but because I know mine wouldn't be.) Falls under the same "not easy but not impossible" umbrella as most other things do!

Everyone mentions either IMAGINARY GIRLS or 17 & GONE. I wonder if it's because they are so popular--or because the niche is so small.

I hoped the concept would help.) It's not real high concept, but it sounds commercial.

 

[DahlELama]

Well, I think it's because Nova Ren Suma writes exactly what you're talking about - the combo of literary + mystery + YA is definitely a tiny niche, and I think she does it the best. Kat Rosenfeld's AMELIA ANNE IS DEAD AND GONE is also similar to this; 17 & GONE just happens to be my favorite. In a way, I guess you could sort of put PLEASE IGNORE VERA DIETZ by AS King in this category too, and that's another one of my favorites.

 

[Windcutter]

I mean.... is it boring? Then it might be too slow. If it caused you to worry enough to post this, it might be too slow. Remember, most of the stuff you put in the book should further the plot somehow. You can add SOME entertaining puffery (like people LOVE reading about the foods in Harry Potter) but not too much to the point where no one remembers what your point was.

It's not boring to me, but I tend to like my own stories. I whine about my writing and think it sucks and so on, but I'd still buy my own books if they were written by someone else. Maybe it's conceited, but it's my honest feeling. Not like "this stuff is amazing and beautiful and mindblowing" but "this stuff is interesting" anyway.

But I'm not used to things developing so slowly. Usually, I would have blown over some character issues and details in favor of pure plot.

If your characters and writing are compelling enough to make the pace feel appropriate, then I don't see a problem.

I guess beta readers will provide me with an answer, but that won't happen for a while, since it's not even half written yet.

It seems I have to worry about making MC more engaging, then--for the readers to be interested in her enough to be patient with her story.

That is just Act 1 of what is really a very simple story, Maria falls in love with the Captain and they have to flee the Nazis, but the script keeps things moving along.

For a young adult novel, have the main character face a long list of problems. Instead of worrying about the story dragging, you’ll wonder how you can fit all the plot into less than five hundred pages. ( Hint: It takes a long time and editing in your mind until you have it all fit together so well you can actually hit the word processor and write it out in a month. )

I used to write screenplays--I actually find it easier to carry tension through one. Exactly because of scene changes. You don't have to stay in a character's head, and the camera's point of view is wider and more powerful.

I think you can have a story with a lot of soul-searching and internal problems that is still fast paced, just like you can have a story with a ton of external conflict that's super slow. Maybe I'm a weird reader, but I tend to prefer something somewhere in the middle.

I'm now trying to imagine a super fast paced story with no external conflict whatsoever. It would be an interesting challenge.

 

[Windcutter]

Well, I think it's because Nova Ren Suma writes exactly what you're talking about - the combo of literary + mystery + YA is definitely a tiny niche, and I think she does it the best. Kat Rosenfeld's AMELIA ANNE IS DEAD AND GONE is also similar to this; 17 & GONE just happens to be my favorite. In a way, I guess you could sort of put PLEASE IGNORE VERA DIETZ by AS King in this category too, and that's another one of my favorites.

Oh you know what--I suddenly realized what could make a good comparison. Not genre wise or quality wise, because once again it's more sophisticated than mine--but structure wise.
SHATT$R ME.
It's not a contemporary at all--it is a YA dystopia. The blurb makes it sound like it's going to be a fast paced book full of plot and action. But the book itself is slow and atmospheric, with a lot of character issues, romance, metaphors, similes and dreamy sequences.

Or using your example (which I probably should read): if AMELIA ANNE IS DEAD AND GONE had a query/blurb that sounded like "When Becca discovers a dead girl in her own backyard, she's determined to find the culprit. But once she starts sorting Amelia Anne's dirty laundry, someone puts a price on her head." You wouldn't expect a slow and atmospheric read, right? More like an energetic investigation with a driven protagonist.

 

[Windcutter]

I think every book has its own pace. Slow does not necessarily equal boring. It’s like eating. I like to take my time on perfectly cooked food, savoring it.

Also, a lot of interior happenings and social interplay may be the most fascinating reading, when we’re in the mood for it. Don’t stint on that because you’re measuring your book against other books.

Write YOUR book, not someone else’s.

I guess it all boils down to "write and see what happens"
Though as a reader, I need to be absolutely fascinated by the characters and the writing voice in order to be patient. I usually read for the plot and I like it hard and fast--I have never read a book that was too fast for me, but there were lots of books that turned out to be too slow.

Just make sure things are happening as you're getting the reader where you want them to go. Like in the earlier Sound of Music outline ... Maria's first conflict is with the abbey, then she has conflict with the ill-behaved children, then with the captain, etc. There's always SOMETHING going on, even if it may not be immediately apparent.

Foreshadowing rules.
Mine has a slow middle, I think: it opens with a bang, but then stretches out lazily until it picks up speed again and spirals down into teh twist. I'll think of ways to add more tension, because--exactly like you describe--I can't move the final race closer to the beginning.

Good luck with the ms.

 

[wampuscat]

I'm now trying to imagine a super fast paced story with no external conflict whatsoever. It would be an interesting challenge.

Ha ha ha! It'd be an interesting challenge to have ANY story without ANY external conflict, but I can see what you mean.

 

[ellio]

I just read Picture Me Gone by Meg Rosoff which is pretty slowly paced and I guess it's mystery. Protagonist goes half way across the world to look for her fathers mate who has walked out on his family suddenly with no
money/passport/keys/explanation. The protag is 12 and a half so its maybe MG? But Meg Rosoff always writes her characters a little older sounding anyway (ie. accurately, in my opinion) but it might be worth reading for comparison.

 

[Windcutter]

Ha ha ha! It'd be an interesting challenge to have ANY story without ANY external conflict, but I can see what you mean.

MC sitting in the middle of the room waiting for Godot XD nope I'll take a developed external plot, it just makes things run so much more smoothly.

I just read Picture Me Gone by Meg Rosoff which is pretty slowly paced and I guess it's mystery. Protagonist goes half way across the world to look for her fathers mate who has walked out on his family suddenly with no
money/passport/keys/explanation. The protag is 12 and a half so its maybe MG? But Meg Rosoff always writes her characters a little older sounding anyway (ie. accurately, in my opinion) but it might be worth reading for comparison.

Thanks, it does sound similar in that it's not a hardcore mystery but definitely has a twist.

 

[Laer Carroll]

I usually read for the plot and I like it hard and fast--I have never read a book that was too fast for me, but there were lots of books that turned out to be too slow.

Ah, but that’s YOU. Readers come in all kinds. Some may hate fast-paced books.

We can theorize about what "the readers" want. But the only reader we can be sure of satisfying is ourselves, and not even there all the time. So I write what I want to read, and hope there are enough other people with similar tastes for my books to sell.

 

[Riz&Roz]

For me, contemporary has always been more about the writing than the plot. Which is hard, because you can't pitch your actual "writing" on an elevator or something. It doesn't have to be fast paced, but you should consider how interesting it is to you. If you feel it's "slow" you might have to add more punchier writing/characters.

 

[Becca C.]

Which is hard, because you can't pitch your actual "writing" on an elevator or something.

"I use nouns, verbs, and I carefully select the correct amount of adjectives and adverbs when needed. Occasionally there are prepositions."

 

[Chris P]

One thing I've been doing lately is writing a draft of the query letter pretty early on in the writing, answering the questions of 1) what does the main character want? 2) what must she or he do to get it? and 3) what prevents this from happening?

Sometimes question 3) is worded as "what happens if the MC fails?" but the wording I have above works better for character-driven novels, since the orcs won't overthrow King Gooddude and plunge Perfectopia into darkness in a high school drama. In character-driven stories, the MC simply doesn't change if he or she fails. The challenge is relaying to the reader why that is bad. Sure, the boy not getting the girl or not escaping knobhead stepparents is bad enough and self-evident, so developing a good conflict to get in his way might work better.

I say all of this to encourage you to think about what gets in the MC's way (this is "the trouble" of the story), and getting to this getting in the way as quickly as possible in an interesting way.

 

[Windcutter]

So I write what I want to read, and hope there are enough other people with similar tastes for my books to sell.

Same here--especially since I need to entertain myself first as I'm writing.

It doesn't have to be fast paced, but you should consider how interesting it is to you. If you feel it's "slow" you might have to add more punchier writing/characters.

I think I tend to perceive introverted writing as slow. As in: self-reflection, thoughts, inner monologue. It's almost like a pause to me: a character stopping to consider things.

In character-driven stories, the MC simply doesn't change if he or she fails. The challenge is relaying to the reader why that is bad. Sure, the boy not getting the girl or not escaping knobhead stepparents is bad enough and self-evident, so developing a good conflict to get in his way might work better.

I say all of this to encourage you to think about what gets in the MC's way (this is "the trouble" of the story), and getting to this getting in the way as quickly as possible in an interesting way.

I think part of the trouble might be that the second half is more plot-heavy. Plot-heavier. I might have an overly long introduction period. Once MC starts being super-active, it's almost time for the downward plot spiral. Food for thought.