A different kind of Query Question

ACEnders · Feb 4, 2008

I know that query letters are supposed to be one page. I'm cool with that. But some agents, Nathan Bransford in particularly, highlights very, very short queries. Or rather, the letter itself isn't short, but the blurb about the book is only one paragraph. This is what he prefers. This is what he likes. This is what excites him.

I can't make mine 1 paragraph. Mine is down to 3 right now, though not perfected (I'm not sure it ever will be.) 3 short paragraphs. I think it's pretty decent.

What are your experiences with queries that got you requests for partials? Are your blurbs super short or a little bit longer? Did you make sure the entire conflict was in that first paragraph, or did you spread it out just a little bit throughout the paragraphs?

Little Red Barn · Feb 4, 2008

ACEnders said:
I know that query letters are supposed to be one page. I'm cool with that. But some agents, Nathan Bransford in particularly, highlights very, very short queries. Or rather, the letter itself isn't short, but the blurb about the book is only one paragraph. This is what he prefers. This is what he likes. This is what excites him.

I can't make mine 1 paragraph. Mine is down to 3 right now, though not perfected (I'm not sure it ever will be.) 3 short paragraphs. I think it's pretty decent.

What are your experiences with queries that got you requests for partials? Are your blurbs super short or a little bit longer? Did you make sure the entire conflict was in that first paragraph, or did you spread it out just a little bit throughout the paragraphs?

Ahh, I never could get my query down. In fact I increased it to two pages and rcvd. request after request. Ohh. But short is generally better and Nathan, I believe speaks for what other agents want. Good luck!

ETA: my book is memoir so it nay have made a difference if I was doing fiction and btw, my agent blew me away when she said, it was one of the strongest query letters agency had ever seen. So go figure.

ishtar'sgate · Feb 4, 2008

I had an extremely short query, almost a logline. It proved to be very successful. Have you posted your query on the forum? Maybe fresh eyes can help you pare it down a bit.
Linnea

Valona · Feb 4, 2008

That's also just his opinion. I've heard some agents say one or two paragraphs can work, but should be on one page. Note the word "should."

ACEnders · Feb 4, 2008

Hmmm..yeah I've posted on the query forum. Posting my newest version now...

David I · Feb 4, 2008

Shorter seldom hurts you, longer often does.

DeleyanLee · Feb 4, 2008

FWIW, I've never had more than a short paragraph on my query letters for the blurb, only 2 or 3 sentences. One novelist friend told me that they don't want a summary, they want the "TV Guide blurb" in the cover letter. That mindset's always helped me narrow down what to put there.

Good luck.

Red-Green · Feb 4, 2008

I know this is abstract, but I finally got my blurb down to a single paragraph (and it's a large, complex story) by giving up on explaining what does happen in the book. Instead I focused on teasing the query reader. A couple of sentences to set up the character and his/her situation and a couple sentences to hint at what might happen to him/her.

Again, sorry that's not concrete advice, but it really did help to simply change the way I was thinking about the query.

Carrie R. · Feb 4, 2008

My pitch was three short paragraphs -- 191 words. The entire letter fit easily on a page and I got lots of positive responses (and multiples offers of representation).

To me the query has to be detailed enough to tell the agent what the book is about.

ETA: my entire query was 313 words.

ACEnders · Feb 4, 2008

Carrie R. said:
My pitch was three short paragraphs -- 191 words. The entire letter fit easily on a page and I got lots of positive responses (and multiples offers of representation).

To me the query has to be detailed enough to tell the agent what the book is about.

Thank you! I was getting very worried about all these other guys saying 1 paragraph was all you needed. I can't do it!!! Mine currently is about 205 words.

caromora · Feb 4, 2008

My query is three paragraphs--intro with information about my book (title, genre, word count), a one paragraph blurb that gives the story concept, and one paragraph of info about me. The whole thing is 200 words and fits on one page single-spaced.

So far I have a 100% request rate. I sent out ten queries to start and got ten requests for partials. I definitely believe that succinct is best. Try to tell what your story is about, instead of what happens in your story (if that makes sense).

Scrawler · Feb 4, 2008

My entire query letter (including space for date, address, contact details, etc. and a brief bio) fits on 1 page. The query portion of the letter is under 250 words.

wayndom · Feb 4, 2008

David I said:
Shorter seldom hurts you, longer often does.

This is quite right. Writers often fall into the trap of thinking that they have to lay out the whole story in their query. That way lies death. The query is always and only a sales-pitch, so you only say as much about the story as is necessary to sell it, not tell it.

Think of the old sales advice: "Sell the sizzle, not the steak." That's what a good query letter does. Touch on the most sizzling aspect of the story, just enough to whet the reader's appetite for more, then make 'em beg for it.

First rule of show biz is, "Always leave 'em wanting more." That is the only function of a query letter -- to offer just enough of a taste to make them want more.

wayndom · Feb 4, 2008

Redzilla said:
I know this is abstract, but I finally got my blurb down to a single paragraph (and it's a large, complex story) by giving up on explaining what does happen in the book. Instead I focused on teasing the query reader. A couple of sentences to set up the character and his/her situation and a couple sentences to hint at what might happen to him/her.

Again, sorry that's not concrete advice, but it really did help to simply change the way I was thinking about the query.

The only part I don't get about this is what Redzilla is apologizing for. She nailed it.

jclarkdawe · Feb 4, 2008

One thing we're seeing is agents talking about spending 10 seconds on a query instead of the 30 seconds that we're used to. This means shorter is better.

But the sad fact of life is that some stories don't compress well. Short queries can be very generic and that's a problem.

Page length queries work. Short queries work. Ideally, you end up with two queries, the quickie for those who want the quick short, and a little bit longer, for those who want a little bit of romance.

I do think that in the next few years, however, we're going to see queries down to one paragraph as the norm. But I don't think we've hit that day yet.

Bottom line is a good query showcasing a good story will work.

Best of luck,

Jim Clark-Dawe

bluemoonscribe · Feb 4, 2008

I wrote two paragraphs on story, one paragraph on my background, one paragraph on my reason for writing said agent and describing my manuscript (word count, etc.) That's about as short as I could get.

A different kind of Query Question

ACEnders

Self-Banned

Little Red Barn

haz own threads

ishtar'sgate

living in the past

Valona

ACEnders

Self-Banned

David I

DeleyanLee

Writing Anarchist

Red-Green

KoalaKoalaKoala!

Carrie R.

Procrastinating, clearly

ACEnders

Self-Banned

caromora

Still alive. Kind of.

Scrawler

Bored fanatic

wayndom

wayndom

jclarkdawe

Feeling lucky, Query?

bluemoonscribe