The following is NOT an actual answer to the OP's question. I just felt like sharing.
When I was 20 years old, I walked (staggered) into the emergency room of a rural hospital (not the absolute boondocks, but pretty close). It was about 4:30 in the afternoon on a Friday and the whole ER was really quiet (a ghost town of inactivity). I was wheezing very heavily, my eyes were bloodshot, my throat was swollen, and I was convinced I was having a generalized allergic reaction to something. I found out later that the correct description is an anaphalactic reaction --which I didn't realize at the time is capable of eventually leading to anaphalactic shock.Now I never had an allergic reaction before, but this had all the earmarks that I had heard about through my TV/couch potato education on such things. Too bad my TV-education was so incomplete because I might have gotten myself to the ER a lot sooner had I known I was capable of dying from this.
As I walked in, I saw a receptionist sitting behind a desk, and then these two guys (two male nurses I later found out) were leaning over the desk laughing with her (like I said, the place was dead, so they were just shootin' the breeze). Now I didn't want to be rude and interrupt their pleasant conversation, so I approached very slowly and hovered about five feet away, waiting for a lull in their conversation that would allow me to interject. But my wheezing was very very loud and so they all turned to look. The two male nurses were absolutely mortified at my apearance, but the receptionist put on her "pencil-pushing beurocrat" expression and asked: "Can I help you?"
I replied as politely as I could with a very strained and raspy voice: "I'm not sure but I think I might be having an allergic reaction."
She immediately produced the standard stack of The Forms, handed them forth with a clipboard, and said: "Please fill these out and--" but then one of the male nurse raised his hand in protest and said to her: "uhhhh....... NO!" And then he turned to me with his index finger and said: "You come with me NOW!"
I was ushered into a treatment room in less than ten seconds. They had me lie down on the gurney and covered me with a bunch of super-heated blankets that were so warm they felt like they'd just come out of the dryer (I guess to keep me from going into shock). About three minutes later a doctor came in and gave me an injection (I guess that epinephrine stuff). I was totally fine within maybe ten minutes of the injection.
I think I eventually did fill out all those forms about two hours later after my family arrived. But I will never forget that male nurse rescuing me from the dreaded forms (and possibly from an early grave).