Introducing multiple characters

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skyi001

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Hi, everyone. I'm new here and looking for opinions for my current dilemma. I have a character who is sitting by, watching a friend get sentenced by a (sort of) court. I am using her to give the reader an overview of what is taking place. My problem is that she doesn't know the judges or their names (there are 7 of them, plus 5-6 other people in the room) and I can't really figure out how to work their names into the proceedings. I could always change the POV to another character who IS familiar with them, but I don't really want to do that as the entire chapter is in her POV...I feel it would be too jarring for the reader to switch at this point.

Some of the judges are important characters, some not as important, but the reader will have to know their names. Would it work to just say "Introductions were made..." then later have her reference them by name....? Eeek! I guess I'll have to experiment. Any suggestions?
 

Julian Black

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Is this story fantasy, where the judges don't have signs with their names on the bench in front of them? Because if it is set in a regular courtroom, or in front of a Grand Jury, those presiding will thus be identifiable by name.

And is there a particular reason why she doesn't know their names? Had she missed out on the trial completely? Did she not discuss it at all while it was happening, especially with mutual friends who may have followed it more closely? I'm just wondering if there is a good reason for her ignorance--one that is crucial to the plot.

If there is, then maybe another character present knows the names of some or all of the judges (and maybe some gossip about them as well). That person could end up talking to your character while waiting for the proceedings to get underway, or notice her response afterward and strike up a conversation.

Also, if there is a group of seven judges, probably only one or two would do most of the talking, particularly at a sentencing. Maybe she can figure out the names of those two, then pick up the names of the others later on.
 

James D. Macdonald

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The problem with giving a roll-call is that it looks like the reader is studying for the test.

If the POV character doesn't know the names, don't give them.

Give the names only when the reader cares about the names.
 

Andrew Jameson

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Sky, you say that some of the judges are important characters. Are they important enough at this point in the book that you would need to differentiate them? Why?

I'm thinking that, if I see a line a seven bewigged and berobed judges for the first time, I'm not even going to remember their names if you told me, much less be able to differentiate among them from one minute to another.
 

katiemac

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What Andrew said.

In your case, I might pick one or two of the most important judges, maybe they have distinctive features or maybe they're off in their own little world talking to each other and so your character notices them more -- whatever.

Then, when they appear later for an important person they can be introduced. Your character will recognize them from the courtroom, and therefore so will the readers.
 

skyi001

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Thanks for all the great advice. Actually, you all made me think of how important it really was to introduce the "judges" at this point in the story, and I discovered it isn't important at all. I was using the scene as a vehicle for establishing relationships and really has nothing to do with the character in which I placed the POV.

As a result, I will either rewrite the scene in another POV or whittle it down to its essence (At the hearing, the judges ruled...etc.) and establish the relationships somewhere else.

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My first post, and you guys are already making me a better writer. What a group! Thank you all for responding.
 
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