Derek, thanks, I'll read that tonight.
Zep, thanks as well. Yeah, I've worked on the scale thing, mentioning the battle as a group or as a group of soldiers, and then the main characters and their struggles. But I still feel like something is missing. I'll probably eventually post them up (there are two major battles in the script) for thoughts and opinions once I feel good about what is there.
I think the key to successfully conveying a battle lies in properly choosing the POV -- the point of view of the characters in the midst of the battle.
It's very easy, because you've got a lot of people, pretty much all dressed the same, in the midst of frantic action, often in very complicated geography, for readers, and also viewers, to become very confused as to what's happening in a battle scene.
If you pick one or two or three characters who are going to be key and stay with them, so that we never lose track of them, and put them where they need to be so that they, and thus *we* see what we need to see to understand how the battle is unfolding -- then it's clear to them (not necessarily all of them, depending on the requirements of the story), and it becomes clear to us.
Then, as you move around the battle field, instead of identifying only by locations, which aren't going to mean much and which may very well change constantly, you lock in the slug lines by *character* -- as they move around and through the battle, the reader, in a sense, moves with them, and thus the geography becomes much easier to follow.
So instead of writing, EXT. EASTERN SECTOR, THE LOWER GULLY - DAY
it becomes, EXT. THE LOWER GULLY, WITH CHARLIE - DAY
And then, EXT. THE HILLTOP - WITH COLONEL JAMES - DAY
While this may not be completely traditional, it serves a very important purpose. Because over the course of the battle field, you might have many different contiguous locations, sides of hills, gullies, trenches, craters -- dozens of little "mini-locations" within the big location. You could have fifty different slug lines and different locations in a very short battle.
But if you stick to your two or three characters as you move back and forth, then a reader will understand, as he moves through all these various locations -- oh, Charlie has moved from the last location -- now he's here. Got it. We're still with Charlie.
In a sense, the character becomes the location, becomes the defined center of the world, through which we see and understand the unfolding geography of the action.
Character X is on top of the hill at the rear, watching. Character Y is down below, part of the advance toward the enemy. Character Z is the enemy Field Commander leading his forces forward in the opposite direction.
Just move between these three. See the battle from these three positions. Never move anywhere else and the reader and by extension the audience will understand what's going on.
Now, obviously, with bigger and later battles you can introduce more characters and subsidiary characters but you should always aim to root the action in your characters' POV.
NMS