It's All About Me

Change the names. Sometimes even change the genders. Deny everything.

I call it the Bart Simpson defence: "I didn't do it. Nobody saw me do it. You can't prove anything."

I'd be honest about it. I told my husband last week that I wrote a "fight scene," a scene of us arguing, in my memoir and I let him read it. After he finished, I said, "Is that an accurate portrayal?" He looked at me then said, "Sure." I told him that it was important that readers see all sides of not only my life, but also our lives together, even though he has a minor role in the story.

I've told friends that they have a scene or two in my manuscript, but I would not let them read it until it's published. Some of them might get their feelings hurt. I don't mind as long as I know that I painted an accurate picture. Sometimes life isn't all peachy.

I hope you didn't name those people...lawsuit city!

Saundra Julian said:

I hope you didn't name those people...lawsuit city!

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In my memoir, the truths that I write about I can prove via eyewitnesses (more than one who have creditability) and a paper trail. I did change some names though. But I can still prove it in a court of law.

But I was writing my memoir as the events were happening (and I kept a journal), so I made sure to keep in contact with the right persons to verify statements if necessary. I always plan ahead.

Write the story of your life.
Go ahead. Be honest. Say whatever you want.

Keep your computer passworded.
Don't show the work to anybody.
(And delete the whole thing once you're through so it doesn't come back to bite you in a decade or so.)

Use this true story as the basis of a work of fiction, if you must.
But change yourself and your friends and your family and your home town and your history and all the circumstances and events
until they are no longer remotely recognizable.

Writing your life, from the heart, may be something you have to do.

Destroying the privacy of innocent bystanders in every direction is hard to justify. There is a basic nastiness in a work that hurts and embarrasses dozens of innocent folks in the effort to get revenge on a few guilty ones.


It can also get you in legal trouble.

-- Many states have privacy laws protecting non-public figures from unwanted publicity. Privacy can be invaded by truth, as well as lies.

-- States also have statues protecting the average person from defamation.

-- And there's a web of relatively new Federal law specifically protecting minors from release of information -- see the CIPA, for instance.

While, 'truth' is a defence against a charge of defamation,
it is the responsibilty of the defendant, (the writer, in this case,) to prove the statements factual ... not the person defamed to prove they are not.
The requirements for evidence in defamation trials are far more stringent than most people realize. Anyone planning to publish 'real life' stories would do well to lay the evidence of their proposed defamation defense before a specialized lawyer prior to publication.

In a side note -- publishers hate to get sued for defamation.

All writing is writing about yourself.

The good thing is, your perception of your life is really different from your actual life.

Well said Job...my point exactly!

While I'm a big fan of truth, I'm also very fond of the right to privacy.

Usually my life, even in its most interesting moments, is far too dull for anyone else to read about, and when it's not too dull, it's too strange to be credible.

About the closest I ever come to writing about myself is incorporating emotions I've experienced as a character's emotion, or incorporating traits I admire/loathe in my characters. Oh, and a short story I wrote recently was inspired by an actual building that I drive past when visiting a friend, and that I always thought was fascinating for the stories it likely held.

JD

give the characters a horrible yet plausible secrets so that when someone says, 'this character was based on me, give me money!' they'll also be forced to add, 'but i was never a crack whore masturbating for nickels on the internet!' because people will be like, 'yeah, right ~ everything *else* is based on you *except* that, huh? sure, we believe you.' on the flip side, if you gave a male character a giant package, you probably won't hear them complaining about the rest. my theory, of course. then again, i think 'he needed killt, yer honour' should be a viable legal defense.

Change the names, write in third person. Put enough fiction in it to be fiction.

I think you put a little bit of yourself and your life into every creation. Just some more than others.

But like it was said before, change the names and your good to go.

I write about me, too. But the characters around me are not based on real friends or people, not directly. Most of the characters are conglomerations of everyone I've either met or observed in my life. But I think that's true with most any writers, whether its conscious or not.

popmuze said:

Job, This is precisely why I stop whenever I find my manuscript getting too close to reality. Unfortunately, this is just about every time.
Luckily, though, for some reason my last WIP had almost nothing to do with anyone I know. That one is now circulating through an agent.

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I haven't yet been pulled into writing a story about my life.
Could it be because my life is so desperately dull?

ponder ponder ponder

scarletpeaches said:

Bart

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She said my name! <3

I suppose certain of my philosophies and attitudes inevitable creep into my fiction, but I can't imagine writing a really autobiographical novel. For one thing, in order to do that, I'd need to have a life.

caw

I'm doing this right now as well, and had a lot of the same feelings. For me, I fixed the issue by merging at least two--sometimes several--real life people into one character. Same with events, merging several real life events from different times into one story.

Anyone here heard of Thomas Wolfe?

He claimed all art was essentially autobiographical.

blacbird said:

I suppose certain of my philosophies and attitudes inevitable creep into my fiction, but I can't imagine writing a really autobiographical novel. For one thing, in order to do that, I'd need to have a life.

caw

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ditto. I get bored just thinking about what my autobiography might include...zzzzzzzzzzzzz. There's no way I'd be able to stay awake long enough to finish it.

But people, art, and philosophy that inspires me influences my writing in a major way.