A moment of clarity

Manderley · Jul 25, 2007

Several things have aligned today to make me realize something to the core of my soul:

I am going to be a fiction writer

No, I don't WANT to become a writer, I am GOING TO be a writer. This will be my main job now, this will be my focus. As of today, I shall learn the craft to the best of my abilities, I will write, I will edit, I will submit, and then I will do it all over again. I will continue to do my freelance assignments as I still need to eat, but as of today writing comes first.

I have always wanted to be a writer, but never had the conviction, but today something changed within me. And I recognize this feeling. It is the same feeling I had four years ago when I realized I didn't really want a job in an editorial office, but wanted to go freelance full time. The very next month I was working full time as a freelance journalist, after having struggled for three years to keep up a part time salary as a freelancer.

I am going to be a fiction writer.

Thanks for listening. Just needed to share that with someone. I feel both giddy with euphoria and frightened at the same time.

Just Mike · Jul 25, 2007

It's a kick in the rear when that conviction arrives. Bravo.

Calla Lily · Jul 25, 2007

We're all in this together. Go for it!

seun · Jul 25, 2007

Manderley said:
I feel both giddy with euphoria and frightened at the same time.

Giddy? I didn't think anyone had felt giddy since the 40s

ccarver30 · Jul 25, 2007

Good attitude! I always say to myself, "I am GOING to do this!" (be a writer).

Manderley · Jul 25, 2007

seun said:
Giddy? I didn't think anyone had felt giddy since the 40s

What can I say? English isn't my first language (as you might have guessed), but I'm married to a Brit with a penchant for 1880-1960 novels. I pick up one of his books now and again, and suddenly my English is scattered with quaint, old words. When I read Rebecca by du Maurier, I used the word "hatefull" ad nauseam for several months.

althrasher · Jul 25, 2007

Aren't those little bursts of insight incredibly exciting?

They're very reassuring in a way, too. It's sort of a knowledge that, "OK, I know I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing."

And the more you learn (for me, the more I read on here,) the better I get.

Welcome to the fun side!

Azure Skye · Jul 25, 2007

Manderley said:
What can I say? English isn't my first language (as you might have guessed), but I'm married to a Brit with a penchant for 1880-1960 novels. I pick up one of his books now and again, and suddenly my English is scattered with quaint, old words. When I read Rebecca by du Maurier, I used the word "hatefull" ad nauseam for several months.

I still use giddy. Giddy is good. Giddy is fun. Giddy makes the world go round. And, I am giddy for you. It sounds like a very positive step forward.

:e2woo:

Claudia Gray · Jul 25, 2007

Plenty of people still use giddy. I know I do, and so do plenty of my friends.

And this is a good reason to feel giddy. Good luck and go for it!

mscelina · Jul 25, 2007

Gaining the conviction is over half the battle. Congratulations!

pisqualie · Jul 25, 2007

I think that is fantastic! I had this very same moment less than a month ago and I still feel the excitement from it, and I feel it in your words.

So ... when do you graduate from "I am going to be a fiction writer" to simply, "I AM a fiction writer"?

GOOD LUCK!!! May your motivation stay strong - I hope you have alot of support and encouragement in your life. That makes all the difference

Soccer Mom · Jul 25, 2007

Welcome to the dark side.

Calla Lily · Jul 25, 2007

Soccer Mom said:
Welcome to the dark side.

Oh, wait, of course I meant :2angel:

.

Zoombie · Jul 25, 2007

The dark side women are more sexy than the light side women, but the dark side men are definitely not on the handsome side, whilst light side men definitely have the beard thing going for them...

Really, neither side is a good side for me.

Oh and welcome to the "Serious" writer's club. Still not sure if I'm on one side or the other. I'm thinking, when I'm published, I'm serious.

And if you ever need inspiration, just look at my quotes.

blacbird · Jul 25, 2007

Just Mike said:
It's a kick in the rear when that conviction arrives.

Be aware that there will be plenty of kicks in other places once you start submitting stuff for publication.

caw

TheIT · Jul 25, 2007

Congratulations! For me, the secret to confidence has always been to make the assertion that "I will do <goal>." Now all that's left is to figure out how, and that's a much less daunting task.

Good luck!

:Sun:

Mike Martyn · Jul 25, 2007

It's both wonderful and strangely terrifying when the muse taps you on the shoulder.

I never wanted to I writer.

I wanted to be a lumber jack in the forests of British Columbia

Calla Lily · Jul 25, 2007

Mike Martyn said:
I wanted to be a lumber jack in the forests of British Columbia

One--two--three--

I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay!...

Scrawler · Jul 25, 2007

I see your positivity and raise it.
I designed a book cover for my WIP, complete with author photo on the back and a "Now a Major Motion Picture" banner across the front. I printed it and wrapped it around my copy of Gotham Writers' Workshop - Writing Fiction. I like playing mind games with my subconscious self.

I am ~~going to be~~ a fiction writer.

Doug Johnson · Jul 25, 2007

King and Grisham focused on their day job until they signed for big bucks. I hope things work out as well for you as it did for them.

Oberon · Jul 25, 2007

Good for you! I made the same promise to myself, less giddily (is that a word?), at a late stage in life. I have two and a half novels written. Now comes the real challenge: Hanging on to your resolve in the face of the slings and arrows of outrageous reality. Put your rejections on your bulletin board as badges of courage, not defeats. Keep going. (I think I am partly talking to myself here). Best of luck to you.

Danger Jane · Jul 25, 2007

seun said:
Giddy? I didn't think anyone had felt giddy since the 40s

No there's been a high concentration of giddy in my area ever since I realized Grace Slick was my hero.

Sick, Manderly!!

Manderley · Jul 25, 2007

Thanks for your lovely words everyone! I feel like opening a bottle of champagne, but
a) I haven't got one, and...
...no, that was it really.

I don't worry too much about rejections. I have worked as a freelance journalist for six years or so, so I'm used to my share of no, no, no, and no way. It's all part of the game. I've also had a couple of rejections for novels (rightfully so, they were goddamn awful pieces *shivers in disgust*), so I know what it feels like when someone kicks my babies (butt-ugly as they might have been).

And good luck to everyone else too, bad sad or good side, dark side or bright side, lumberjack or not.

IrishScribbler · Jul 25, 2007

Congratulations on your decision. May you continue to be convicted enough to keep your butt in the chair!

Lady Esther · Jul 25, 2007

A moment of clarity

Slowly does it.

A trifle upsetting, isn't he

On hiatus

Horror Man

Nicole Castro

Slowly does it.

Prodigal Muser

Huh?

Teh doommobile, drivin' rite by you

Crypto-fascist

On hiatus

Dragon of the Multiverse

Infuriatingly Theoretical

On hiatus

Bored fanatic

Slowly does it.

I can say the alphabet backwards!