I really do need help with this

You're not "getting the answers [you] would like" because the very idea that there is some process by which you dream up a reality show idea and then "send it in" is silly and betrays a fundamental ignorance of how the television industry operates.

Do your own research. There is no step-by-step guide for what you want to do, you're going to have to forge your own path. There's no secret address that someone on a messageboard can give you.

Do the research.

I'm sorry, but Joe is right.

You aren't going to get the answers you like.

However, I can help with some questions.

1. Who do i send it to?

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Answer: Watch reality shows. Make a note of the names of the production companies involved, and the names in the credits.
Read Variety. Make a note of who is buying what, and their names.
Consult a business directory and get the address of the production companies.

Send a query into them.

Will it work? Probably not. The producers of 'American Idol' had people pitching a variation of 'American Inventors' consistently since Idol started. Every single person was convinced it was a new concept that the producer's wouldn't have thought of or heard of before.

I seem to recall someone on Larry Brody's 'TV Writer' board had successfully sold a quiz show format (kinda like 'Wheel of Fortune') , so it might be worth asking whoever sold the format what they did.

From memory, the beauty of his format was that as his simple quiz show format was REALLY REALLY REALLY cheap to make - which meant it was within the budget of a smaller local channel. If it was successful, it could be licensed to the larger networks, but it could be made without anyone risking a large amount of money. (Remember, a TV channel can buy re-runs of 'Friends' for under $50k and those re-runs rate very well!)

Good luck,

Mac