What the literary agent is really thinking

Fran · Jun 15, 2013

I just came across this article in The Guardian and thought it might be of interest.

What I didn't say was that I often drive 200 miles a week to visit that novelist who has a towering ego and has to be cajoled out of his tantrums to fulfil commitments he's made to the publishing house he's tied to – a contract he wanted but I urged him not to take. I foresaw trouble.

Yikes. I realise this agent doesn't speak for them all, but I thought it was a good insight. And I promise if I ever have anything an agent would be interested in I'll be very well-behaved.

Phaeal · Jun 15, 2013

I will bet you any number of kittens that this troublesome author has earned/is earning the agent a LOT of money and/or prestige. Otherwise, she wouldn't put up with such antics.

That said, towering egos are a huge pain in the ass to deal with. That's why I keep mine no larger than a modest two-bedroom ranch. Tempermental? Ain't got time to be tempermental. Got writing to do.

Fran · Jun 15, 2013

My writing ego is a one-person tent at the moment. A one-person tent still in its box in a tiny shed.

Phaeal · Jun 15, 2013

Aw, we've got to get you a two-person tent at least.

James D. Macdonald · Jun 15, 2013

Entirely too many newbies think, "Famous and Rich Author X is a monumental jerk. Therefore, the surest way to become Rich and Famous is to become a monumental jerk, just like him!"

Alas, while they often achieve monumental jerkitude, wealth and fame seem, somehow, to elude them.

Stacia Kane · Jun 15, 2013

I'm pretty sure mine is thinking, "Stace, get your lazy ass off the internet and finish that damn edit."

willietheshakes · Jun 15, 2013

Stacia Kane said:
I'm pretty sure mine is thinking, "Stace, get your lazy ass off the internet and finish that damn edit."

One of my editors signed up to Twitter to tell me to get off Twitter.

Fran · Jun 15, 2013

James D. Macdonald said:
Entirely too many newbies think, "Famous and Rich Author X is a monumental jerk. Therefore, the surest way to become Rich and Famous is to become a monumental jerk, just like him!"

Alas, while they often achieve monumental jerkitude, wealth and fame seem, somehow, to elude them.

Yeah. Unless that monumental jerk is bringing in the cash, I just don't see how it's worth the agent's time and effort. It may be that this particular author started off as calm and mild-mannered and the ego gradually inflated. I know agents have to pick work they can sell, and the author's personality is often secondary to that, but as Phaeal said, unless there's megabucks involved I can't see an agent putting up with this behaviour for long.

Miss Snark said on her blog that she just doesn't work with jerks - it's not worth the hassle for her, no matter how good the ms. It would be interesting to know how many agents feel the same.

Barbara R. · Jun 15, 2013

willietheshakes said:
One of my editors signed up to Twitter to tell me to get off Twitter.

Ha! Mine advised me to get on it--or rather (and more logically), the publisher's marketing maven did.

Barbara R. · Jun 15, 2013

Fran said:
Miss Snark said on her blog that she just doesn't work with jerks - it's not worth the hassle for her, no matter how good the ms. It would be interesting to know how many agents feel the same.

I know mine does. There's a two-part interview with her (Gail Hochman) on my blog in which she makes it clear that one of her first questions when she likes something is "Can I work with this person?" When I was an agent, it mattered to me, too, though I rarely encountered any writer I didn't think I could work with.

I do think that the better and/or more popular the work, the more tolerant agents and editors are likely to be. Some writers get away with shenanigans that others would be kicked to the curb for pulling, like delivering late or not at all.

blacbird · Jun 15, 2013

Hmmmm . . . yet another thread that flies in the face of that "the manuscript is all that matters" mantra we so often see posted here.

caw

Andrhia · Jun 15, 2013

blacbird said:
Hmmmm . . . yet another thread that flies in the face of that "the manuscript is all that matters" mantra we so often see posted here.

caw

There are more than enough great, publishable books to go around. Given the choice between a client with a great, publishable book who's a total jerk and a client with a great, publishable book who's sunshine and fluffy kittens to talk to, what would you choose?

blacbird · Jun 15, 2013

Andrhia said:
There are more than enough great, publishable books to go around. Given the choice between a client with a great, publishable book who's a total jerk and a client with a great, publishable book who's sunshine and fluffy kittens to talk to, what would you choose?

1. It isn't up to me to choose.

2. The bolded, above, is another statement about which many commenters here take issue. It gets directly into the mythology that there exists a vast galaxy of "publishable" work that never gets published. Considering what does get published, that seems a tenuous contention, at best.

caw

Barbara R. · Jun 16, 2013

blacbird said:
Hmmmm . . . yet another thread that flies in the face of that "the manuscript is all that matters" mantra we so often see posted here.

caw

The ms. isn't all that matters, just the first and most important thing. If it's not compelling to the agent, nothing else matters. If it is, then the other things come into play: Can I sell it? Can I deal with the writer? Is there a publishing history to use or overcome? And so on.

Ken · Jun 16, 2013

... if I ever get an agent I will bow and scrape:
"Yes sir, that would be a great thing to do."
"Yes sir, that would be a great thing to do."
"Yes sir, that would be a great thing to do."
"Yes sir, that would be a great thing to do."
"Yes sir, that would be a great thing to do."
Maybe once in awhile I will differ in opinion:
"Excuse me, sir. Perhaps a comma might possibly be placed here. Not to say I'm insisting on it. Far from it. I am merely making a suggestion. . ."

Andrhia · Jun 16, 2013

blacbird said:
1. It isn't up to me to choose.

It is, actually. A literary agent is a person running a business the way he or she sees fit, not an initiate sworn to be the faithful instrument serving the higher needs of literature. It's absolutely up to the agent to refuse to represent someone who sounds like a nightmare to work with.

blacbird said:
2. The bolded, above, is another statement about which many commenters here take issue. It gets directly into the mythology that there exists a vast galaxy of "publishable" work that never gets published. Considering what does get published, that seems a tenuous contention, at best.

This would also come back to people in publishing being human beings. Taste varies; mistakes are made. Those two facts are more than enough reason for a great book to not be published, and for a lousy one to make it onto shelves.

Susan Coffin · Jun 16, 2013

I'm pretty sure mine is thinking, "Stace, get your lazy ass off the internet and finish that damn edit."

One of my editors signed up to Twitter to tell me to get off Twitter.

Mine advised me to get on it--or rather (and more logically), the publisher's marketing maven did.

Love it!

buz · Jun 16, 2013

blacbird said:
Hmmmm . . . yet another thread that flies in the face of that "the manuscript is all that matters" mantra we so often see posted here.

caw

I have only been around a couple years, but I can't remember anyone saying "the manuscript is all that matters." (Which I think would be untrue.) I have seen plenty of people say "the manuscript is the most important thing," which I think is true (except for, say, widespread fame).

(Again, I could be wrong; I haven't read all threads ever and I'm just going by memory...)

ap123 · Jun 16, 2013

blacbird said:
Hmmmm . . . yet another thread that flies in the face of that "the manuscript is all that matters" mantra we so often see posted here.

caw

In general, I agree with your sentiment. In this thread, though, I think we're likely talking about an established money making agent. I doubt a debut novelist (who wasn't already a big name in something that was projected to = big sales), would be treated the same way.

blacbird said:
2. The bolded, above, is another statement about which many commenters here take issue. It gets directly into the mythology that there exists a vast galaxy of "publishable" work that never gets published. Considering what does get published, that seems a tenuous contention, at best.

caw

I guess it depends on the frame of reference. One of the big bestsellers that often get looked down upon for quality...obviously the agent was spot on, because tons of readers buy them and love them.

Disclaimer: Not that I really know, since I'm unagented and unpublished. Speculation on a speculative business.

djf881 · Jun 17, 2013

Andrhia said:
There are more than enough great, publishable books to go around.

False. Good books are incredibly scarce, although major publishers do occasionally miss some of them.

Phaeal · Jun 17, 2013

I'd say there's a simple inverse relationship at work:

The more famous/infamous the author, the less the MS matters. If it even exists prior to the hiring of a ghost.

The less famous/infamous the author, the more the MS matters.

Cynical maths, but hey, it's Monday.

Jaims22 · Jun 17, 2013

Phaeal said:
I'd say there's a simple inverse relationship at work:

The more famous/infamous the author, the less the MS matters. If it even exists prior to the hiring of a ghost.

The less famous/infamous the author, the more the MS matters.

Cynical maths, but hey, it's Monday.

I'd say that's a logical conclusion.

Andrhia · Jun 17, 2013

Phaeal said:
I'd say there's a simple inverse relationship at work:

The more famous/infamous the author, the less the MS matters. If it even exists prior to the hiring of a ghost.

The less famous/infamous the author, the more the MS matters.

I'd reframe that a little and put it as "the more copies the name on the cover will sell, the less the MS matters. If the name on the cover won't sell any copies on its own, the MS had better be damn good." But yeah, I agree. Everyone has to make the choices that they think will keep them in business.

What the literary agent is really thinking

Fran

Slate grey mole person

Phaeal

Whatever I did, I didn't do it.

Fran

Slate grey mole person

Phaeal

Whatever I did, I didn't do it.

James D. Macdonald

Your Genial Uncle

Stacia Kane

Girl Detective

willietheshakes

Gentleman. Scholar. Bastard.

Fran

Slate grey mole person

Barbara R.

Old Hand in the Biz

Barbara R.

Old Hand in the Biz

blacbird

Andrhia

blacbird

Barbara R.

Old Hand in the Biz

Ken

Andrhia

Susan Coffin

Tell it like it Is

buz

can't stop hemorrhaging emojis

ap123

Twitching

djf881

AW Addict

Phaeal

Whatever I did, I didn't do it.

Jaims22

Andrhia