What would you tell your younger self?

Mine wouldn't be writing-specific, but it'd be extremely helpful there anyway. I have a very thorough learning style that doesn't let specific glaring weaknesses live for more than a few months, so I'd address my less-than-elite work ethic.

Dear 14-year-old SOO,

Get good at doing two things:

1) Things you really, really don't want to do. As a general rule, what fits in this category is anything you've ever decided to put aside until tomorrow, or next week, or next year, or forever.

2) Pushing yourself past your comfort zone, into situations where you'll likely fail. You need to screw up to succeed. If you're wondering whether following this advice and failing more often will hurt your self-esteem, it won't--the habit of avoidance is what tells you that you can't do things, not the failures. Oftentimes when you fail you'll get close, or, gasp, even succeed.

I could have sent this to you two years ago, but you've never needed it more than you need it now.

To younger me, I'd say stop abusing the thesaurus and flesh out the characters. You can drive the plot while still giving everyone personalities.

Just start writing. What are you waiting for?


I always wanted to write a novel, and I started when I was 24. I wish I'd started a few years earlier.

But other than that...I have no particular advice.

Well, I didn't start writing fiction until I was in my thirties because I had all manner of hang ups about people reading my writing. I guess because it feels so exposing. It still does.

But that stupid anxiety probably kept me from practicing and learning the craft earlier. Granted, my older self might (big maybe) write better fiction, because she's had more life experience. Nevertheless, I'd tell my younger self to get over herself and just f*cking write.

Also...wear sunscreen.

Don't try too hard to 'write originally.' I always wanted to have a special 'tone' to my writing- something that would distinguish me from everyone else. Because of this desire I would often get stuck re-writing a single sentence for 15-20 minutes at a time. Sometimes I'd circle back and do it again! A good chunk of energy and time was wasted. I could have written so much more than I did.

My writing became overly superfluous. I used too many big girl words to say something that could have been described much easier if I had kept it simple. I also took forever to describe a single scene, so that action became almost non-existent.

And let me tell you- boy howdy- I thought I was the moon and the stars. My writing 'was excellent and everyone should love it.' If someone didn't like my writing then they were just jealous of my originality. Yes, I was that girl.

Looking back, I realize that both my arrogance and my need to be fluffy-lengthy were a detriment to my writing, not a help. When this notion came to be I knew that my writing needed a serious overhall. The arrogance fell to the wayside, as did unnecessary language. I was ready to learn and grow.

I keep it neat and simple now. I believe that simplicity is a beautiful thing. No more run-on sentences or big-word after big-word after big-word paragraphs. No more trying too hard to be the only heard voice in a crowd of millions.

Does that give my writing a unique feel to it? Probably not- but at least my readers can now understand the story I am trying to tell. Also, I'm far more productive now as I'm not spending half-hour sessions touching up a single sentence. I like things better this way, and I hope my readers do, too.

In summary? Keep it simple.

Younger Self: You're better than you think. If you went after this writing thing instead of being awash in self-doubt (like you are in every-freakin'-thing), your adult life will be richer, literally and figuratively.

Maryn, pretty sure younger self won't buy it

I would tell my younger self to stop trying to be a wunderkind and dump the pressure. I spent a good chunk of my 20's with an enormous amount of self-imposed expectations. I was going to be the next Anne Rice or Stephen King before I was 25, dang it! That's what all my teachers and friends said, anyway. And who was I to tell them they were wrong? LOL.

Trouble is, by putting that kind of pressure on myself I crashed and burned. I had a major publisher interested in my book but I was so focused on making it perfect that I couldn't finish the dang thing. I freaked out, and had to step away from writing anything for a while. It took me more than ten years to feel like I was ready to try again.

This time there's no pressure and it's a lot more fun. Revisions no longer give me cold sweats, and I know to never, EVER query anything that's not done! Most important, I no longer care if I'm the next Stephen King. I just want to write stories that entertain people.

Some advice to my younger self: nothing you write is set in stone. Give yourself permission to screw up, write awful stuff. No one gets something the first time around. Keep reading, practicing, studying the craft, and you'll get there. (Hopefully)

More advice: It takes YEARS to get good at something for most people. When you started writing, chances are you were awful which is ok. Your writing has improved tremendously compared to when you first started, and will continue to the more you study/practice. Occasional frustration is normal, but don't let it weigh you down.

Don't force it.

Allow the characters to tell their own story. They know better than you do.

If you don't feel like writing, don't make yourself. You'll regret it during re-writes.

Don't ever let writing - and everything that comes with it - take over your world. While it's exciting and fun and something you love, you love your family more. If you let it take over your world, you'll burn out and give it up completely. Even if only temporarily.

Nothing is more important that family and actually living your life with them rather than as a wallflower on the sidelines with your laptop propped on your lap and your fingers on the keyboards.

Live. Love. Laugh.

Use your writing abilities to enhance that, not take you away from it.

Fade said:

To younger me, I'd say stop abusing the thesaurus and flesh out the characters. You can drive the plot while still giving everyone personalities.

Click to expand...

100% in agreement, Fade.

Finish shit.

Be consistent.

Creativity is not neat and tidy. It's messy. Deal.

Dear Younger Self,

Dump him.

Kind regards,

Older Self

PS. Oh, and do write that book! Really!

Study harder, focus on science. Veterinary Medicine. No, seriously. Stop hanging out with those losers. Don't blow off the little red headed girl.

ETA: And further more, don't bother reading fiction. No good will ever come of it.

Don't wait so long. I was always writing something, but didn't get serious about submitting until I was almost 40. I kept 'waiting' for my kids to get older. What the heck was I waiting for? It's not until I found an old AHMM and read some stories in it that I realized this can be a serious venture (writing) and I needed to get my ass out of my hands and try to make a go of this.

Relax more. Write the things you actually want to write, not the things that you're convinced will make for Good Writing. Be okay with not finishing things, and keep starting new things to try out instead of getting hung up on not having hit some perfect level yet.

And for the love of god, don't put any of the really crappy writing online. That unfinished novel in college is not your precious gift to the world, kid, and you'll feel a lot better ten years later if you're sure no one can ever find it again.

Maryn, leahzero, can y'all send my younger self postcards with your advice on them?

Okay, my two cents to my younger self...

-Develop the discipline now, cuz it's not going to get any easier to find time once you've got the FT job and the FT school and the housekeeping and the husband and the etc. Set a word count goal and stick to it every day, young lady. You'll thank me later.

-Live. Get messy, take the long way home, walk in the rain, haunt coffee shops, take every single crazy opportunity life hands you (including that one to move halfway across the country, because that one in particular works out well in the end). All of those experiences end up in your writing somehow, some way. All of them are good, even the scary ones.

-Go to the beach more often. It's good for you.

I would tell myself to get over myself. Stop worrying about hang-ups and insecurities, stop feeling like you need to be brilliant, stop worrying about sharing your work. Just do it. You're young; of course you're going to be terrible. Good writing takes lots and lots of practice.

It's not just a pipe dream.

To my childhood and teenage self I'd say: Keep doing what you're doing (writing prolifically, believing in yourself, and not letting a rejection letter send you running for the Kleenex).

To my young adult self: Submit more. Quit shoving things into a drawer, convinced they have no chance before giving them a chance. And write more instead of stressing over whether the things you've already written are good enough. Lastly, don't let yourself quit because life has you down. That will make things worse, not better, and you'll regret the lost time.

Hmmm, I suppose I'd tell my younger self to keep creating and to cultivate that no-fear way of life.

The biggest, brashest, boldest decisions have been the most exciting and the most rewarding.

Dear Younger Self,
Keep writing. Seriously, don't stop...

Dear younger self:

You know those books you love so much? They're written by people. No, really. You can do it too, and get paid for it. Don't listen to the stupid people around you who say fiction is useless in the "real world." They're wrong.