FINAL TASK - The Rewrite.

Joe Calabrese · Oct 15, 2005

Okay Entrants, here is your final task.

The Rewrite!

Go back to your entries in Task 1 and rewrite the first few scenes-- UP to the 1st FOUR PAGES.

The only requirement your producer has is...

If its Comedy, make it funnier.
Scary? Make it scarier,
Thrilling? Make the reader sweat with anticipation.

In other words, bring it up a notch.

NOTE: By the end of your new, submitted pages, a reader must be able to tell what the genre is, either by setting, action, tone or dialog. This will be a major part of the voting, so make it clear.

If you wish to change the genre, go ahead, but make note in your email what the new genre is, otherwise I will use the original genre stated from Task 1.

You have until October 22nd (10pm EST) to submit the rewrite.
Email it to me, either in WORD, FINAL DRAFT or HTML only.

THE TOP THREE WINNERS WILL BE ANNOUNCED ON OCTOBER 31st.

Again, no more than FOUR PAGES of submitted material.

Good luck and you are all winners for doing the three tasks. You are a better writer for it.

Joe

Joe Calabrese · Oct 15, 2005

I forgot to mention one thing...

You're rewriting someone else's task one entry, not yours.

Email me for your assigned entry number.

NOTE: The legal stuff.
The owner of the original entry from Task 1 is the legal owner of the work and you, the rewriter, have no claims to the title, plot or characters originally written. You are rewriting this work only for demonstration purposes of your talent and in no way can make claim to any co-authorship of the work. Subsequently, the original owners of the work cannot make claim and/or ownership to any additional material written by the rewriter for said rewrite unless permission is obtained from the rewriter to use any said additional material used in such rewrite.

Good luck.

Joe Calabrese · Oct 24, 2005

HELLO VOTERS.

We lost one entrant, but he/she is still a winner for getting this far.

Down to 12 entries.

VOTING ENDS on Sunday, November 6th, 2005 - MIDNIGHT (EST)

THE END IS HERE! THIS IS THE FINAL TASK TO DETERMINE...
Who can handle a spec, a synopsis and a rewrite!

WHO is THE ULTIMATE SCREENWRITER?

Here is the criteria for judging.

PICK the MOST FAVORITE based on:

1. How well it is written. Does it make you want to read on?

2. Is the GENRE CLEAR? You will need to answer the genre question correctly in order for the vote to count. I made it pretty easy though.

3. If you wish, compare them to TASK 1 entries of the same title to see if it is better than the original (or ruined), however this is not a requirement for judging since it is a lot of pages to read.

You can read TASK 1 entries HERE.

(NOTE

If you do compare, indicate your brief thoughts in the PM as it may skew the votes.

VOTING ENDS on Sunday, November 6th, 2005 - MIDNIGHT (EST)

THANK YOU ENTRANTS for your HARD WORK

AND

THANK YOU VOTERS AS WELL!

Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

ENTRY 1

ENTRY 1:
TITLE: EXTINCT

HTML:

        FADE IN:

        EXT. ZOO - DAY

        The DIRECTOR almost runs into two GUARDS armed with rifles.

                              DIRECTOR
                  Have you found it?

                              GUARD #1
                  There's no sign of it.  We've searched
                  everywhere.

                              GUARD #2
                  We looked in all the storage areas.
                  The pens and cages, too.  Nothing.

        The Director checks his watch.

                              DIRECTOR
                  We can't wait any longer.  We'll
                  have to let people in.

        The two Guards look at each other.  Oh-oh.

                              DIRECTOR (CONT'D)
                  If we don't, they'll become
                  suspicious!  Next thing you know
                  we'll have cameras and reporters all
                  over the place.  I can't risk it.

                              GUARD #1
                  Hey, how about this?  Why don't we
                  say an animal has escaped?  Nothing
                  dangerous.  We just don't want it to
                  come to any harm.

                              GUARD #2
                  People would get it all excited.  It
                  could hurt itself.

                              DIRECTOR
                  Say, that's not a bad idea.  An hour.
                  We'll delay opening for another hour.
                  Keep looking.  I'll issue a statement.

        The Director and the Guards hurry off.  Then they turn
        around and hurry past each other, going the other way.


        EXT. ZOO ENTRANCE - DAY

        The ZOO GATEKEEPER unlocks the gates and lets VISITORS in.

                              ZOO GATEKEEPER
                  Hello.  Good morning.  How are you?
                  Hope you enjoy yourselves.  etc.

        Among the visitors, ROBERT and SUSAN, 30, and their 6-year-
        old daughter BRITNEY, enjoying a day out together.

                              ZOO GATEKEEPER (CONT'D)
                  And have you come to see anything
                  special, miss?

                              BRITNEY
                  I think all the animals in the zoo
                  are special.  You too, Mr. Homo
                  Sapiens.

        The Zoo Gatekeeper grins.  Britney skips past him.

                              SUSAN
                  It's okay, we keep her on medication.

                              ROBERT
                  We never let her out of our sight,
                  either.

        They hurry after Britney.


        EXT. LION'S DEN - DAY

        Robert, Susan and Britney watch the big cats.

                              BRITNEY
                  Mommy, can I climb down there and
                  play with the cubs?

                              SUSAN
                  The mommy lions might object, sweetie.

                              BRITNEY
                  You mean the lionesses, don't you?

        Robert and Susan exchange weary smiles.

                              SUSAN
                  Oh my, we have been reading our animal
                  book.

                              ROBERT
                  Even the cubs are dangerous.  They
                  have claws and teeth too, you know.

                              BRITNEY
                  They wouldn't hurt me.  I'd talk
                  nice to them.

        Robert sees Guard #1 walking between some cages armed with a
        rifle.  Guard #1 looks this way and that, then hurries away.
        Robert wonders.

                              ROBERT
                  Come on, next stop, the monkey house.

                              BRITNEY
                  I love monkeys!

        Britney runs off, Robert and Susan hurry after her.


        EXT. ZOO ENTRANCE - DAY

        The Director grabs the Zoo Gatekeeper as more VISITORS enter.

                              DIRECTOR
                  You bumbling incompetent fool!  Didn't
                  you get my message?

                              ZOO GATEKEEPER
                  What message?


        INT. STORAGE ROOM - DAY

        Dark.  The door opens, Guard #2 enters.  He looks around
        warily.  Feels for the light switch.  The lights flicker on.
        They reveal wooden crates stacked around the walls, and a
        second door facing the entrance.

        A big crate lies open and empty in the middle of the room,
        with straw scattered around.  A stenciled sign on the side
        says DEMOCRATIK REPUBLIK OF BOZOSTAN.

        Guard #2 approaches the other door.  He takes a deep breath,
        slowly reaches for the door handle, turns it.  He takes aim
        with one hand -- and pulls the door open!

        An empty broom cupboard.  He sighs with relief.


        INT. DIRECTOR'S OFFICE - DAY

        The Director paces up and down and dabs his forehead with
        his handkerchief as he talks angrily on the phone.

                              DIRECTOR
                  Don't try to pin this on me!  I'm
                  telling you we got the wrong crate
                  delivered!  It should have been our
                  new koala, drugged up to the eyeballs.
                  Instead we got a, a, a, I don't know
                  what you'd call it!  Where is Bozostan
                  anyway?  What?  Siberia?  How old?!


        INT. LABORATORY - DAY

        White and sterile.  SIX SCIENTISTS wearing biohazard suits
        and masks approach a wooden crate.  One of them jemmies it
        open and lifts the lid.  The six Scientists lean over to
        peer into the crate.

        A koala bear lies curled up and fast asleep on a bed of straw.
        The Scientists look at each other, bewildered.  One Scientist
        crouches down to read the stenciled sign:  SYDNEY ZOO.  LIVE
        KOALA.  HANDLE WITH CARE.  IT BITES.


        EXT. ZOO - DAY

        Britney stops at a junction of paths between cages and pens.
        She looks around and sees a door that lies ajar.


        INT. TOOL SHED - DAY

        Dark.  Britney peeks inside.  Hardware and old tins.

                              BRITNEY
                  Hello?

        No answer.  She squeezes inside.  Examines the shadows.

                              BRITNEY (CONT'D)
                  I know you're there.  I heard you.


        INT. LABORATORY - DAY

        The koala leaps out of the crate and fastens its teeth into
        the neck of a Scientist who screams and topples backward.

        A hatch slides shut, sealing the lab.  Red lights strobe and
        a security alarm HOWLS.  An electronic sign says:  BIOHAZARD
        CONTAINMENT ALERT.  The Scientists crowd around the hatch
        and hammer it with their fists, terrified.

        The attacked Scientist wrestles on the floor with the koala.

In order for your vote to count, you must answer the following question correctly.

WHAT IS THIS STORY'S GENRE?

A) Sci-fi / Suspense
B) Drama
C) Romantic Comedy

VOTE by PM and include either ENTRY 1: or TITLE: EXTINCT in the SUBJECT LINE, along with your answer.

Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

ENTRY 2
TITLE: FAMILY OF MAN

HTML:

                                                              FADE IN:



               EXT. CENTERVILLE ZOO-NIGHT

               The zoo is draped in darkness. Still, quiet.

               Inside the cages, animals huddle together in the safety of
               shadows, deep in slumber. 

               Beat.

               (O.S) An elephant CRIES out in a harsh painful wail. 



               INT. MAINTENANCE OFFICE-NIGHT

               TOKOFAY, 30's, an African native, wise beyond his years,
               bolts upright on a small cot. 



               EXT. ELEPHANT ENCLOSURE-NIGHT

               The door to the enclosure draws part way open. Tokofay ducks
               under and enters into a vast opening.

               TOKOFAY'S POV: A giant elephant, CHEEKO, wrenches up on his
               hind legs in a fit of uncontrolled rage. Another elephant,
               MAYLA, lays motionless beneath his feet. 

               DEIGO, early 20's, a trainee, ignorant and foolish, stands
               near Cheeko. He yanks down hard on an extended pole latched
               to a collar around Cheeko's neck. 

               Tokofay races over behind Deigo.  

                                   TOKOFAY 
                         Deigo, buya, buya. Get back!

               Diego yanks harder. Cheeko shakes his head violently and
               again rises up. Deigo struggles to keep hold.

                                   DEIGO
                         If I let him go, he'll kill Mayla. 

                                   TOKOFAY
                         Don't let him go and he will kill
                         you. Get back. 

               Cheeko jerks wildly. Deigo's hands slip from the pole. Cheeko
               snaps free and clouts Deigo with his trunk.  

               Deigo's flies through the air and cracks his head against a
               giant boulder.  His body slumps to the ground. Blood oozes
               from his scalp into the cracks of the cement.

               Cheeko continues to charge after him. 

               Tokofay dashes out in front of the giant beast.

                                   TOKOFAY
                         Ma Cheeko. Cha canyayo! 

               The elephant stops abruptly, rears back and rises up in front
               of Tokofay.

               Tokofay reaches out and speaks calmly.

                                   TOKOFAY
                         Guka ezanzi. Cha esaba. 

               The elephant eases down on all fours.

                                   TOKOFAY
                         Bheka lapha nje. 

               Tokofay points to his own eyes. The elephant reluctantly
               makes eye contact.

                                   TOKOFAY
                         Cooh-le. 

               Tokofay walks closer and cautiously lays his hand on Cheeko's
               trunk and massages gently. 

                                   TOKOFAY
                         Cha esaba. Kulungile. 

               Cheeko settles and lies down at Tokofay's feet. Tokofay
               notices a swollen PUNCTURE WOUND on the side of Cheeko's
               neck.

                                   TOKOFAY
                         Musa shukuma. 

               Tokofay pats the elephant on the head and hurries over to
               Deigo. He kneels beside him, puts his finger on his wrist.

               Deigo is dead.



               INT. DIRECTOR'S OFFICE-DAY

               The director, TOM JENSON, 50's, unreasonably firm, stands
               behind his desk, fumbles with the buttons on his jacket. 

               Tokofay stands before him, adamant and angry. 

                                   TOKOFAY
                         Someone put something in Cheeko. It
                         made him wild like a rabid animal.
                         I've seen the same mark on the
                         others. 

                                   TOM
                         I assure you Tokofay, no one is
                         hurting the animals. We think it
                         might be a virus. We're doing
                         everything we can.  

                                   TOKOFAY
                         How? By killing them then shutting
                         it out of your mind? I will not let
                         you kill Cheeko. Another death is
                         not the answer.

               Tom slips off his coat and lays it over his chair. 

               Tokofay slams his fist down on the desk.

                                   TOKOFAY
                         You do not hear me. Deigo is dead,
                         Mayla hurt. How many others will
                         suffer and die before you see? 

               Tom darts out from behind his desk, veins pulsing. He pokes a
               finger at Tokofay's chest. 

                                   TOM
                         Deigo was a fool! I give you a job,
                         a place to live. I'd get smart and
                         watch who's toes you're stepping on
                         pal, otherwise that little secret
                         of yours, won't be so secret
                         anymore. Are we clear?

               Tokofay stiffens.

                                   TOKOFAY
                         You would use this against me? What
                         they are doing to the animals is
                         dangerous. Do you not care of what
                         happened here, what will happen?

               Tom puts his face right up in Tokofay's.

                                   TOM
                         Are...we...clear?

               Tokofay clenches his jaws and backs away, 

                                   TOKOFAY
                         Yes. We are clear.



               INT. ELEPHANT'S CAGE-DAY

               JANET MILLS, late 20's, a dedicated zoologist, bends down
               next to Mayla and listens to her heart. 

               Tokofay approaches her from behind. 

                                   TOKOFAY
                         Where has Cheeko gone?

               Janet rises and plucks the stethescope from her ears.

                                   JANET
                         I'm sorry Toko. They came and took
                         him only an hour ago. 

               Tokofay stares blankly. Devastation tugs at every wrinkle,
               line, and muscle in his face. 

                                   TOKOFAY
                         No...no. 

               Janet steps toward him.

                                   JANET
                         I'm sorry Toko. I tried-

               Tokofay falls to his knees and buries his face in his hands. 

               Janet kneels down in front of him and wraps her arms around
               his heaving shoulders as he crumbles into tears.



               EXT. ZOO-DAY

               Tom stands in front of a crowd, surrounded by media. Camera's
               flash from every direction as reporters thrust their mics in
               front of his face.  

                                   TOM
                         I'm sorry folks, but that's all I
                         can give-

               A young MAN, a zoo employee, taps Tom on the back.

                                   YOUNG MAN
                         It's Tokofay. You need to come now.

In order for your vote to count, you must answer the following question correctly.

WHAT IS THIS STORY'S GENRE?

A) Romantic Comedy
B) Horror
C) Sci-fi / Thriller

VOTE by PM and include either ENTRY 2: or TITLE: FAMILY OF MAN in the SUBJECT LINE, along with your answer.

Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

ENTRY 3
TITLE: NAKED APE

HTML:

            FADE IN:

            INT. LONDON TOWNHOUSE - DAY

            DIERDRE SMYTHE, late 40's wearing a frumpy bathrobe and
            slippers stands over a table and pours a steaming cup of tea. 
            She sets the pot down and arranges the morning paper next to
            it.

            The newspaper, The Daily Sun, has a headline that reads: 

            "CROWDS GO APE OVER HUMAN ZOO EXHIBIT"

                                DIERDRE
                          (yelling upstairs)
                      John, your tea's hot!

            INT. UPSTAIRS BATHROOM - CONTINUOUS

            JOHN SMYTHE, late 40's is dressed in a suit much to trendy
            for someone of his age, giving him the look of a man who is
            going through a mid-life crisis.  He is speaking quietly into
            a phone.

                                JOHN
                      Lucinda? Hello? This is John.  
                          (beat)
                      She might suspect something.
                          (beat)
                      No.  I think she's rather hoping I'm
                      having an affair.

            There is a loud knock on the bathroom door.

                                BILLY (O.S.)
                      John, open up!!

                                JOHN
                          (on the phone)
                      I'll be over in 45 minutes.  Okay, bye.  

                                BILLY (O.S.)
                      John, open up!  I need to use the bog.

            John hangs up the phone and opens the medicine cabinet.  He
            takes out a bottle of Viagra and swallows two of the pills.  

            John opens the door and his son BILLY SMYTHE, a 14 year old
            goth-wannabe rushes past.  

                                JOHN
                      Do you think you could call me Dad?

                                BILLY
                      Piss off John.

            Billy slams the door shut.

            INT. LONDON TOWNHOUSE - CONTINUOUS

            The doorbell rings and Deirdre answers it.  

            Standing in the doorway are COWBOY and INDIAN.  Cowboy is in
            his 50's and dressed like a big game hunter on safari.  He is
            holding a long pole with a noose on the end, a rifle is slung
            over his back.

            Indian is a ancient looking African tribesman barefooted and
            wearing a sarong.  He carries a cowbell and drumstick.

                                COWBOY
                      Dierdre Smythe?

                                DIERDRE
                      Yes?

                                COWBOY
                      We're here for your husband.

                                DIERDRE
                      Are you coppers?

                                COWBOY
                      No ma'am we're with the Royal Zoological
                      Society.  You're husband's agreed to
                      contribute to an exhibit.  We're here to
                      collect him.  We've got papers.

            Indian pulls a thick bundle of papers out of his sarong and
            hands it to Deirdre.

                                DIERDRE
                      Well, if you've got papers... He's
                      upstairs.

                                COWBOY
                          (to Indian)
                      You go upstairs and flush him out.  When
                      he comes down I'll snag him with the
                      noose.  Don't talk to him, it'll confuse
                      and frighten him.  We'll use code names. 
                      I'll be Cowboy, you Indian.

            Indian nods his head.

                                DIERDRE
                      You're not going to hurt him are you?

                                COWBOY
                      No ma'am, were professionals, we are. 
                      Hunted lions in Africa and never harmed a
                      hair on their heads. 

            Indian begins to beat the cowbell with the drumstick and
            moves slowly up the stairs.  The sound echoes loudly in the
            house.  John's footsteps can be heard as he comes downstairs.

                                JOHN (O.S.)
                      Deirdre!  There's a bloody Zulu
                      warrior...

            Cowboy snags John with the noose choking him as he enters the
            room.  

                                COWBOY
                      Got him!  

            John grabs the pole and jerks it from Cowboy's hands.  

                                COWBOY (CONT'D)
                      He's loose!  Indian hurry, get him
                      cornered.

            Indian follows John around the room and beats the cowbell
            faster and louder.  John jumps on top of the sofa, the look
            of a cornered animal in his eyes.  Cowboy pulls the rifle
            from his shoulder and puts a tranquilizer dart in the
            chamber.

                                JOHN
                      Deirdre! 

                                DIERDRE
                      They've got papers John!  Said you've
                      agreed to contribute to the Royal
                      Zoological Society.

                                JOHN
                      Nigel said that was an investment
                      shelter...

            Cowboy takes aim with the rifle and shoots John in the neck
            with the tranquilizer dart.  John winces in pain and pulls
            the dart out. 

                                DIERDRE
                      I guess you can't trust your solicitor,
                      dear.

            John falls to the sofa unconscious. 

                                COWBOY
                      Well that's got it.  He should be out for
                      a good hour now.

                                DIERDRE
                      He's not hurt is he?

                                COWBOY
                      No, he'll be fine, he will.  Bit of a
                      headache, but he'll be fine.

                                DIERDRE
                      Oh, well that's good.  Would you like a
                      cup of tea?  I've got the pot on.

In order for your vote to count, you must answer the following question correctly.

WHAT IS THIS STORY'S GENRE?

A) Comedy
B) Horror
C) Drama

VOTE by PM and include either ENTRY 3: or TITLE: NAKED APE in the SUBJECT LINE, along with your answer.

Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

ENTRY 4
TITLE: CAGED

HTML:

                 A horn blares amongst the traffic sounds of a busy city
                 street.

                                         MALE VOICE
                           Step right up and help yourself
                           folks.  Don't be shy.  There's
                           plenty to go around.



                 FADE IN:



                 EXT. CITY STREET CORNER - DAY

                 NOAH PRECKER, late 20's, casual and cocky, stands on a
                 crowded street corner holding a large box with 'Free
                 Samples:  VALTREX CONDOM INC.' stamped on the side.

                 Noah winks at a young, pimply faced teen and hands him a
                 handful of condom packets.

                                         NOAH
                           Here you go young man.  Take a few
                           in case one breaks.  And don't
                           keep them in your wallet.  That's
                           the worst place.

                 The teen looks to see if anyone is watching, then stuffs
                 the condoms in his pockets.

                                         NOAH 
                                (to the teen)
                           Run along and enjoy yourself now.
                                (to the crowd)
                           That's right folks, safe sex used
                           to mean mom and dad were out for
                           the night--

                 Three nuns, in contemporary dress, approach and eye him
                 warily.

                                         NOAH 
                           --but things are a lot more
                           complicated now and the good folks
                           at Valtrex want to make sure...
                           um...

                 Noah swallows, and squares his shoulders.  BIG NUN, about
                 as demure as a drill sergeant, goes nose to nose with
                 Noah and gives him the stink eye.

                                         BIG NUN
                           You're on our corner.

                 LITTLE NUN, with an armload of flyers, smiles sweetly at
                 Noah.

                                         LITTLE NUN
                           Get lost, buddy.  Don't make us
                           call our back-up.

                 Noah looks up to heaven and swallows again.  He then
                 flashes his best ****-eating grin.

                                         NOAH
                           Aw, come on now.  Can't we all
                           just get along?  We're both trying
                           to save people, right? How about
                           if I just stand over...

                 YOUNG NUN approaches.  She's cute, savvy, and all
                 business.  She gives Noah a sarcastic smile.

                                         YOUNG NUN
                           Okay, what'll it take for you to
                           set up camp somewhere else?

                                         NOAH
                           Well, you see I'm not suppose to
                           go back until I've handed all of
                           these out and... are you really a
                           nun?  'Cause you're pretty hot--

                 Young nun rolls her eyes.

                                         NOAH
                           --I mean.. not that I'd be
                           interested but I've got this
                           roommate who--

                                         YOUNG NUN
                           Five?  Ten?

                 She pulls out a ten dollar bill and waves it in Noah's
                 face.  He snatches it, and looks back at Big Nun.

                                         NOAH
                           Okay, now you're speaking my
                           language.
                                (whispers)
                           Are you sure she's not a drag
                           queen, cause she's really scary. 
                           Just sayin'.

                 Noah walks away with his nose in air.  He stops, backs up
                 and grabs a flyer from Little Nun.  As he crosses the
                 street he glances at it, then tosses it over his
                 shoulder.

                 It drifts slowly to the ground and lands face up:  YOUR
                 DESTINY AWAITS!



                 EXT. CITY - DAY

                                         MONTAGE
                           Noah walks the crowded sidewalks
                           of the city searching for an
                           available street corner.

                 The first one is occupied by a homeless beggar.  The
                 second, a street musician.  The third, a religious
                 fanatic.  The fourth, a mime.  Noah briefly challenges
                 the mime, then gets chased away by the mime's angry
                 imaginary dog.

                 Exhausted, Noah finally finds an empty street corner.  He
                 begins to hand out condoms and is immediately surrounded
                 by several burly, scary male prostitutes in drag.  Noah
                 sheepishly backs away, as they advance on him.  When he
                 gets backed against a wall, Noah holds out his box of
                 condoms as a peace offering.

                 They take it, and he sprints away.



                 INT. APARTMENT - DAY

                 LESTER SIMMS, 30, still looking like a buttoned-up
                 Catholic boy, sits inches away from the television.  He
                 watches 'The Sound of Music' enraptured by the sight of
                 Maria in the convent.

                 Noah drags himself through the door, shoulders slumped,
                 face drawn.  Lester immediately shuts the television off,
                 and sits innocently on the couch.

                                         LESTER
                           How was your first day on the job?

                                         NOAH
                           Well... it was also my last day. 
                           That give you an idea?

                                         LESTER
                           Oh.

                 Noah slumps down next to Lester on the couch.

                                         NOAH
                           What you been up to?

                                         LESTER
                           Um... nothing.

                 Noah eyes him suspiciously.  He notices perspiration on
                 Lester's upper lip.  Noah flicks the television on.  The
                 ugly nun is singing "Climb Every Mountain". Noah shakes
                 his head.

                                         NOAH
                           You know, you'd be a lot better
                           off if you had a burka fetish. 
                           You might actually have a chance
                           of landing someone, not to mention
                           avoiding that eternal damnation
                           thing.  I did meet a pretty cute
                           nun today, though.

                 Lester gives Noah a look.

                                         NOAH
                           Really I did.  And she gave me a
                           tip.

                 Noah waits for Lester to bite, but he looks away instead.

                                         NOAH
                           She told me the best way to get a
                           nun pregnant--

                 Lester is suddenly interested.

                                         NOAH
                           --dress her up like an altar boy.

                 Noah laughs loudly and punches Lester on the shoulder. 
                 Lester mouths something under his breath.

                 A KNOCK at the door.

                                         NOAH
                           If that's Clara, I'm not home.

                 Lester opens the door.

                                         LESTER
                           Hi Clara.  Noah and I were both
                           hoping it was you.  Oh look, and
                           little Scotty too.

                 Lester shoots Noah an evil grin and moves aside as CLARA,
                 30's, barges in with SCOTTY, a viciously spoiled four
                 year-old.

                 Before Noah can open his mouth, Clara pulls out her check
                 book.

                                         CLARA
                           Okay, Noah.  Just one night.  You
                           only have to watch him one night. 
                           What's it gonna cost me?

                 Noah eyes her speculatively.

                                         CLARA
                           I'm your sister, for God's sake. 
                           How about fifty dollars?

                                         NOAH
                           A hundred.

                                         CLARA
                           Seventy-five?

                                         LESTER
                           Sold.  Scotty's such a little
                           sweetheart, Noah should be paying
                           you.

                 Noah shoots daggers with his eyes at Lester.

In order for your vote to count, you must answer the following question correctly.

WHAT IS THIS STORY'S GENRE?

A) Sci-fi
B) Horror
C) Comedy

VOTE by PM and include either ENTRY 4: or TITLE: CAGED in the SUBJECT LINE, along with your answer.

Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

ENTRY 5
TITLE: CAT FROM CAHABA

HTML:

            SUPER: December 30th, 1862. The USS Monitor is being towed by
            the USS Rhode Island to join the blockade of Charleston
            Harbor.

            FADE IN:

            INT. USS MONITOR / CAPTAIN'S STATEROOM /PASSAGEWAY - NIGHT

            At his desk the CAPTAIN writes the daily log. The ship rocks
            in the heavy seas. 

            The Captain ignores the storm until the ship violently bucks.
            He gets up and dashes out into the passageway.

            In the passageway the Captain is met by a PETTY OFFICER who
            was coming down to get him. 

                                PETTY OFFICER
                      The tow lines--

                                CAPTAIN
                      I know, they've become uneven.

            EXT. USS MONITOR -

            The Captain, the Petty Officer and two CREWMEN emerge from
            the turret with a tether rope tied around their waists.  

            The ship bucks and the men on the deck are thrown.

            Two 4 inch cables connect the Monitor to the Rhode Island.
            The Chief Petty Officer points to the one taunt tow line.

                                CAPTAIN
                      Can we signal the Rhode Island?

                                PETTY OFFICER
                      I'm afraid not Captain but maybe we can
                      tighten the other line from here.

            The ship bucks again. Like the crack of a whip one tow line
            snaps. Fifty feet of cable flies back with lethal force and
            strikes one of the crewmen. His broken body lies on the deck.

            The Petty Officer and the other Crewman pick up the wounded
            sailor and carry him back into the turret. The Captain
            follows them but returns outside with an ax.

            The ship continues to buck even more violently than before.
            With several swings of the ax the Captain cuts the cable.  

            The ship no longer violently bucks but is still being tossed
            by the storm.

            INT. USS MONITOR / TURRET - 

            Other crewmen carry the wounded man below deck. The Petty
            Officer turns to the Captain.

                                PETTY OFFICER
                      But now we're adrift--

                                CAPTAIN
                      It's a lesser evil, a single tow line
                      would have capsized us.

            The ship pitches from side to side a sea sick crewman vomits. 

            INT. USS MONITOR / PASSAGEWAY / GALLEY-

            Several crewman stand ready as the Captain and the Petty
            Office come below deck.

                                CAPTAIN
                      Fire up the boiler, the rest of you man
                      the bilge pumps.

                                PETTY OFFICER
                      Aye. You've heard the Captain.

            The crewmen rush to their stations.

            GALLEY:

            Loose objects fall and break LANDSMAN FRANCIS BUTTS loses his
            footing and crashes to the floor. HENRY SINCLAIR, an older
            African and ship's cook helps Butts to his feet.

            A BLACK CAT wearing a collar with a shinny metal tag scurries
            to safety.

            The Petty Officer enters.

                                PETTY OFFICER 
                      Both of you to the pumps!

            The ship begins to roll again. The Black Cat howls in fear.

                                PETTY OFFICER
                      Good God, throw that jinx over board!

                                FRANCIS BUTTS
                      I'd sooner touch a ghost than kill a cat.

                                PETTY OFFICER
                      And I just as soon hang you.

            The Petty Officer reaches for the cat but Henry Sinclair gets
            to the cat first and holds the animal in his arms.

                                HENRY SINCLAIR
                      I's take care it, if you don't mind.

                                PETTY OFFICER
                      Then do it quick and get to the pumps
                      like the rest of us darkie.

            INT. USS MONITOR / TURRET - MOMENTS LATER

            Henry carries the cat to the breech of one the large cannons.
            He removes the tampion and wad. The cat protests as Henry
            places him inside.

                                HENRY SINCLAIR
                      Don't you worry, we know it all turns
                      out.

            The metal tag on the cat's collar reflects the light as the
            breech is closed.

                                HENRY SINCLAIR
                      Your fortune be ours.

            INT. MARINE SALVAGE BUILDING / OFFICE - DAY

            The two large cannons and several pieces of the turret from
            the Monitor are in the middle of preservation. Several
            workers clean and examine the artifacts.

            TOM BRADLEY, 30's, enters the building. Clean shaven, in a
            suit with a cell phone up to his ear. He talks as he walks
            past the work area on the way to his office

                                TOM BRADLEY
                          (on the cell phone)
                      Like isn't that freaky? They find a cat
                      inside... I say maybe they where using
                      live ammunition... Oh you heard that
                      one... Don't worry, the Smithsonian can
                      pick up the cannons next... Yeah bye.

            Tom folds up and pockets his cell phone as he comes to his
            office. 

            OFFICE:

            Tom enters and to his surprise TWO MEN IN SUITS and ALLISON
            LANGLEY, 30'S, dressed professionally with cold hard glint in
            her eye are waiting for him. 

                                TOM BRADLEY
                      ****, I thought I'd never see you again.
                      Still CIA?

                                ALLISON LANGLEY
                      Homeland Security. It's about the anomaly
                      in the cannon. 

                                TOM BRADLEY
                      The dead cat?

            Allison hands Tom the cat's collar. Tom examines the collar
            and the engraved tag.

                                ALLISON LANGLEY
                      The Smithsonian sent this to us.

                                TOM BRADLEY
                          (reads the tag)
                      Ulysses, 334-872-5683, Cahaba Pet Supply,
                      Cahaba Alabama. 

            Tom voice trails off as he reads. He reaches into pocket for
            his cell phone.

                                MAN IN SUIT
                      I wouldn't do that sir.

            Tom stops in mid motion, his face is pale.

                                ALLISON LANGLEY
                      I always loved your sense of humor.

                                TOM BRADLEY
                      This is no joke, honest.

                                ALLISON LANGLEY
                      Shame, I was hoping it was.

            Allison nods to one of the men and he leaves the office.

                                ALLISON LANGLEY
                      My people will be taking over the site.
                      And everything that's happen so far comes
                      under the National Securities Act-- 

                                TOM BRADLEY
                      Yeah I know the drill.

                                ALLISON LANGLEY
                      Good. This time don't forget who's in
                      charge.

In order for your vote to count, you must answer the following question correctly.

WHAT IS THIS STORY'S GENRE?

A) Sci-fi
B) Horror
C) Comedy

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Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

ENTRY 6
TITLE: CANCER BLOWS

HTML:

                                   DUKE (V.O.)
                         You wanna know what New York is?
                         It's a series of people telling you
                         in precise terms exactly why it is
                         you can't get what you want.

                                                       BEGIN SERIES:

               A TEENAGE GIRL with serious attitude shakes her head.

                                   GIRL
                         We don't have that.

               A RENTAL CAR CLERK shakes his head.

                                   CLERK
                         If you look at the fine print on
                         the ad, you'll see it's available
                         in all areas EXCEPT New York City. 



               A FAST FOOD CLERK SMIRKS.

                                   FAST FOOD CLERK
                         We don't take that coupon! 



               A MOVIE THEATRE CASHIER CHEWS GUM.

                                   CASHIER
                         Sold out. 



               DIFFERENT SHOTS OF PEOPLE SHAKING HEADS: A BANK MANAGER,
               WAITRESS, CAB DRIVER, DOORMAN.

               A GREASY MAN sits behind a thick wall of protective glass.

                                   GREASY MAN
                         NO!!!!

                                   DUKE (V.O.)
                         But everyone once in awhile you
                         meet someone who won't take no for
                         an answer. Someone who CAN'T take
                         no for an answer. And that's what
                         makes New York, New York.



               INT. HOSPITAL ROOM 

               DUKE, 30, is talking to TIMMY, 15, hair just beginning to
               grow back from his chemo. 

                                   DUKE
                         You want what?

                                   TIMMY
                         You heard me.

                                   DUKE
                         You're a freakin' kid.

                                   TIMMY
                         That's if you count from my birth
                         day til now. But if you count
                         backward, from my deathday...

                                   DUKE
                         Deathday? That's not even a word.

                                   TIMMY
                         So you're gonna fight this on a
                         technicality?

                                   DUKE
                         No, I'm gonna fight this on account
                         of it's unethical, not to mention
                         ILLEGAL. 

                                   TIMMY
                         You said you were here to grant my
                         wish, right? I could have anything
                         I want, right?

                                   DUKE
                         Yes, but-

                                   TIMMY
                         That's what I want.

                                   DUKE
                         I think you're missing the point of
                         what we do. Now, if you wanted a
                         visit from, say a Yankees player...

                                   TIMMY
                         Okay, first of all, I'm a Mets fan.
                         Second, I'm not on treatment. I'm
                         gonna die here in this bed. I don't
                         think a visit from a ****ing
                         baseball player is gonna cut it!

                                   DUKE
                         Great, I finally get a Mets fan,
                         and instead he wants a hooker.

                                   TIMMY
                         I didn't say hooker. I said I want
                         to lose my virginity. 

                                   DUKE
                         Oh excuse me, you want me to find
                         you a girlfriend who puts out on
                         the first date. And where are you
                         gonna take her? The hospital
                         cafeteria?

                                   TIMMY
                         You really don't seem cut out for
                         this job. Wish granting.

                                   DUKE
                         I have granted every wish that's
                         ever been asked of me.

                                   TIMMY
                         It's a shame you're not going to be
                         able to say that now.

                                   DUKE
                         How about a trip to Disney? Or a
                         meeting with a movie star? 

                                   TIMMY
                         Can I have sex with her?

                                   DUKE
                         No!

                                   TIMMY
                         I told you my wish.

                                   DUKE
                         You're serious?

                                   TIMMY
                         How many kids you know survive
                         longer than a month when they go
                         off Chemo? 

                                   DUKE
                         You're serious.

                                   TIMMY
                         How old were you when you lost your
                         virginity?

               A moment. The two just stare at each other. 

                                   DUKE
                         I'll see what I can do.

               INT. HOSPITAL ICU HALLWAY

               Duke meets up with MAGGIE, 28, who holds a stack of very
               clearly labeled and color coded files. They walk down hall.

                                   MAGGIE
                         The Yankees, right?
                             (Duke shakes head, Maggie
                              gets excited for him)
                         The Mets?

                                   DUKE
                             (visibly upset)
                         I don't want to talk about it.

                                   MAGGIE
                         Look, you can't leave me in the
                         dark here. We only have so much
                         time. He went off the treatment two
                         weeks ago.

                                   DUKE
                         I know.

                                   MAGGIE
                         So there are things we need to set
                         in motion. If he wants to meet
                         someone from out of state, we have
                         to book travel...

                                   DUKE
                         I'm pretty sure we won't be going
                         out of state for this.

               They reach the double doors.

                                   MAGGIE
                         So, what do you need me to do?

                                   DUKE
                         Don't ask.

               He pushes through the doors and leaves her.

                                   MAGGIE
                             (shouting)
                         We are a team! I want to help!

In order for your vote to count, you must answer the following question correctly.

WHAT IS THIS STORY'S GENRE?

A) Drama
B) Horror
C) Comedy

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Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

ENTRY 7:
TITLE: REGRET

HTML:

               INT. SYNTECH LABORATORY, MEN'S WASHROOM - DAY

               In the mirror above the sink of a high tech stainless
               bathroom DARWIN TRUETT washes his teary face.  He towel dries
               his face and then dabs off the water on his expensive dress
               shirt and tie.

               A scientist, DR. MILES  rushes in.  He flicks back his long
               white lab coat and takes a whiz.

                                   DR. MILES
                         You okay, Dar?  You've been in here
                         a long time.

                                   DARWIN
                         A little nausea, that's all.

                                   DR. MILES
                         Those damn protestors outside
                         getting to you too?

               Dr. Miles zips up and vigorously scrubs his hands in an
               adjoining sink.

                                   DR. MILES
                         When are they going to get it?  We
                         sacrifice the lives of a few
                         monkeys in order to save human
                         lives.

               Darwin leans back on the sink.  He sways - a wave nausea.

                                   DR. MILES
                         You know you shouldn't have named
                         them...as if they were pets.
                             (shaking hands dry)
                         That's what's making you sick.

               Darwin rubs his eyes.

                                   DARWIN
                         I'll be alright.

               Dr. Miles leaves.

               Relieved, Darwin heads into a private booth.  He locks the
               door tight.  He stretches a pair of surgical gloves on.

               He removes the lid to the toilet's tank and pulls out a large
               ziplocked bag.  He shakes the water off the bag and zips it
               open.  Several green substance filled syringes inside.

               Darwin zips it shut.  He peeps between the cracks of the
               booth...No one.  He wipes beads of sweat from his forehead.

               Darwin removes his white lab coat from a hook.  From it's
               pocket he pulls out a .45 pistol and flicks off he safety. 
               He peeps between the cracks again...No one.



               INT. SYNTECH LABORATORY, MONKEY ROOM - DAY

               Several caged monkeys sit listlessly in their cages.  Some
               monkeys jump around in excitement as Dr. Miles moves from
               cage to cage and checks the clipboard chart in front of them.

               A MONKEY observes Darwin as he quickly and quietly walks
               behind Dr. Miles through the room and behind a desk.

               ON THE DESK

               Several tiny monitors each with a view of a caged monkey.  He
               inconspicuously flips a master switch and the monitors go
               blank.

               He slips the bag of syringes from beneath his lab coat and
               stashes it between the monitors.



               INT. SYNTECH LABORATORY, LAB ROOM - DAY

               The giant lab is full of busy, lab-coated SCIENTISTS.

               Darwin quickly moves to the back of the room.  He jumps on a
               desk and waves his gun.

                                   DARWIN
                         Okay everybody, move to the monkey
                         room.

               The Scientists look up confused.  Some stand and raise their
               hands.

                                   SCIENTIST
                         Darwin, what are --

                                   DARWIN
                         Shut up!  And do as I say.  Move
                         it.  Everybody.  Now!

                                   SCIENTIST
                             (concerned)
                         Darwin...

               Darwin shoots a light in the ceiling.  It shatters.  The
               Scientists crowd through the door to the monkey room.



               INT. SYNTECH LABORATORY, LAB ROOM - DAY

               The Scientists file in to the room.

                                   DR. MILES
                         What's going on?

                                   SCIENTIST
                         Darwin's finally flipped his lid.

                                   DARWIN
                             (pointing the gun)
                         Open that cage, Miles.

                                   DR. MILES
                         Are you crazy?

               Darwin shoves the gun on Dr. Miles head.

                                   DARWIN
                         Do it.

                                   DR. MILES
                         Alright.  Alright.

               Dr. Miles opens the cage.  The Monkey just sits there.

                                   DARWIN
                         Joby, get out.

               Joby, the monkey hops out of the cage.

                                   DARWIN
                             (to Dr. Miles)
                         Get in.

                                   DR. MILES
                         I'm not --

               Darwin slams the gun on his head.  Some Scientists lunge
               toward Darwin but he quickly responds by swinging the gun
               around.  

                                   DARWIN
                         Everybody shut up!  And just do as
                         I say.

               Dr. Miles bleeds as he crams himself into the cage.

                                   DARWIN
                             (to a scientist)
                         You next.

               Monkeys run around in wild abandonment, while others sit
               lethargic and spiritless as Darwin locks up the last
               Scientist in a cage.

               Joby jumps on the desk and shakes the bag of syringes.

                                   DARWIN
                         Give me that.

               Joby lovingly jumps right into Darwin's arms and obediently
               hands him the bag.

               MONKEY SCREAMS come from one cage.

               Darwin points his gun at a Scientist.

                                   DARWIN
                         Give me your cellphone.

               The Scientist reluctantly hands over his phone.  Darwin looks
               over each cage.  Each Scientist watching him like a hawk.

                                   SCIENTIST
                         You are insane.

               Darwin takes a syringe from the bag and sticks the Scientist.

                                   DR. MILES 
                         Darwin, what are you doing?  That
                         stuff could kill us.

               Darwin immediately sticks Dr. Miles with another syringe.

               The other Scientists scream out which excites the Monkeys
               even more.  Each Scientist attempts to fight of the needle
               stick by they efforts are useless in the tight cages.

               It takes only moments for each Scientist to squirm and thrash
               about in their cage...until they are DEAD.

               Some Monkeys pick up the empty syringes and continually stab
               the Scientists through the cages, excited, freaked out, and
               happy.

               Darwin removes the ammunition from the gun and drops them in
               a hazardous waste can.  He gives Joby the gun.  Joby runs
               around jubilant with his gift.

               Darwin locks himself in a cage.  He squirts out most of the
               fluid from the last syringe, injects himself with a small
               dose, and drops the needle through the cage.

In order for your vote to count, you must answer the following question correctly.

WHAT IS THIS STORY'S GENRE?

A) Sci-fi
B) Thriller
C) Comedy

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Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

ENTRY 8
TITLE: 21st CENTURY YENTA

HTML:

               FADE IN:

                                     RUBY  (O.S.)
                         I'm quite certain Ma would not have 
                         understood, nor approved.

               INT. LOFT -- BEDROOM -- DAY

               RUBY, almost forty though none would guess, an over 
               achieving  business savvy professional with nothing left 
               over for her personal life, sits up in bed talking on the 
               phone.

               Beside her a lump rests beneath the sheets.

                                     RUBY
                         I'm not sure I do.

               INT. SALON -- DAY

               DIAMOND, Ruby's stunning half sister, an early 30-something 
               who doesn't take the family business as seriously as she 
               perhaps should, blows her nails dry as she chats on her cell.

                                     DIAMOND
                              (affected Jewish 
                              accent)
                         Ru-bel-lah, you look so...what's 
                         the word?  
                              (her own voice)
                         Survey says: desperate!

               INT. LOFT -- BEDROOM -- DAY

               Ruby appears exasperated.

                                     RUBY
                         Please stay on topic.

               The lump stirs. 

                                     RUBY (CONT'D)
                         I think Jamey's awake.  Gotta go.

               Ruby hangs up as the lump moves toward the top of the 
               sheets.

               JAMEY, a giant mongrel of a dog, explodes from the sheets.  
               His tongue lashes at Ruby; she GIGGLES as she deflects with 
               a pillow.

               GWEN, mid-20's, elegant, uber-professional, bustles in.

                                     GWEN
                         It's on.

               She sets a coffee down near the bed and grabs the remote, 
               turning the TV on.

               INSERT - TV

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
                                                                         2.                         
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                    
                                     RUBY  (V.O.)                                                   
                         It's love at first sight, or...                                            
                                                                                                    
               Diamond and JEFFREY, a dishy model, lock eyes.                                       
                                                                                                    
                                     RUBY  (V.O.) (CONT'D)                                          
                         ...At least by that night.                                                 
                                                                                                    
               Jeffrey helps Diamond with her coat.  Pause.  A                                      
               Kiss--passionate, full.  The commercial FADES as a TITLE                             
               appears:                                                                             
                                                                                                    
               "21st Century Yenta 1-800-YOUR LUV"                                                  
                                                                                                    
               Ruby GROANS O.S. as the TV clicks off.                                               
                                                                                                    
               BACK TO SCENE                                                                        
                                                                                                    
                                     RUBY (CONT'D)                                                  
                         Who wrote that mindless drivel?                                            
                                                                                                    
                                     GWEN                                                           
                         Don't be so hard on yourself.                                              
                                                                                                    
               Gwen bustles back out the way she came.                                              
                                                                                                    
                                     GWEN (O.S.) (CONT'D)                                           
                         Gazebo at ten.  Come Jamey!                                                
                                                                                                    
               Jamey bounds off the bed and exits the bedroom.                                      
                                                                                                    
                                     RUBY                                                           
                         Traitor!                                                                   
                                                                                                    
               Ruby resignedly tosses back the covers and climbs from bed.                          
                                                                                                    
               INT. GAZEBO -- DAY                                                                   
                                                                                                    
               At the edge of the gazebo Ruby, Diamond, and Gwen watch as                           
               the handful of well dressed GUESTS gather around the GROOM                           
               and BEST MAN.                                                                        
                                                                                                    
               A PREACHER clears his throat, ready to begin.                                        
                                                                                                    
               The Groom turns to face the Preacher.  So does the Best                              
               Man.  The two hold hands as it becomes clear: they are                               
               actually Groom and Groom.                                                            
                                                                                                    
                                     PREACHER                                                       
                         Friends, family, we are gathered                                           
                         here today....                                                             
                                                                                                    
               As the Preacher drones on, Diamond beams, Gwen discreetly                            
               checks her planner, and Ruby looks away uncomfortably.                               
                                                                                                    
               A frisbee catches her eye.  Ruby watches it to Jamey's                               
               mouth.  He runs it back to HOGAN, a hippy throw back and                             
               permanent assistant to Ruby and her crew.                                            

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
                                                                         3.                         
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                    
               The frisbee again flies and Jamey follows after it, as                               
               polite APPLAUSE sounds behind Ruby.                                                  
                                                                                                    
               She turns and sees she has lost track of time as Groom and                           
               Groom cement their vows with a polite peck.                                          
                                                                                                    
               Ruby grimaces, quickly replacing it with a smile.  Ruby                              
               whispers to Diamond.                                                                 
                                                                                                    
                                     RUBY                                                           
                         Ma definitely would not have                                               
                         approved.                                                                  
                                                                                                    
               Diamond politely claps, smiling like a runway model.                                 
                                                                                                    
                                     DIAMOND                                                        
                         She would have liked the paycheck.                                         
                                                                                                    
               Ruby can't stand it anymore.  She leaves.                                            
                                                                                                    
               Diamond runs to catch up.  Gwen deftly handles the couple                            
               of Guests who notice the abrupt departure.                                           
                                                                                                    
               INT. PARK -- DAY                                                                     
                                                                                                    
               Ruby paces through the park toward Jamey and Hogan.                                  
                                                                                                    
                                     RUBY                                                           
                         Jamey!                                                                     
                                                                                                    
               Diamond catches up, places a hand on her half sister's                               
               shoulder and spins her to face her.                                                  
                                                                                                    
                                     DIAMOND                                                        
                         You're right.                                                              
                                                                                                    
               This catches Ruby off guard.                                                         
                                                                                                    
                                     DIAMOND (CONT'D)                                               
                         You and the rest of the cynics.                                            
                                                                                                    
               Ruby scrunches up her brow, unsure she's following.                                  
                                                                                                    
                                     DIAMOND (CONT'D)                                               
                         Love sucks.  And we've had the cash                                        
                         flow problems to prove it.                                                 
                                                                                                    
               Ruby squints at Diamond, knowing she's being set up.                                 
                                                                                                    
                                     DIAMOND (CONT'D)                                               
                         But these guys--                                                           
                                                                                                    
               Ruby knew it.  She turns and marches on.                                             
                                                                                                    
                                     DIAMOND (CONT'D)                                               
                         No!  Wait.  Hear me out.                                                   
                                                                                                    
               Ruby turns again to face Diamond.                                                    

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
                                                                         4.                         
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                    
                                     RUBY                                                           
                         No, you hear me.  This isn't right.                                        
                         And you know it.  Never mind what Ma                                       
                         would say.  How about her mother                                           
                         before her, and hers, and so on.                                           
                         This is something our family's been                                        
                         doing since time began.                                                    
                                                                                                    
                                     DIAMOND                                                        
                         And we're still able to do it, you                                         
                         and I.                                                                     
                                                                                                    
                                     RUBY                                                           
                         Not me.  No more.  I won't do this.                                        
                                                                                                    
               Ruby turns just as Jamey catches up.  She walks past Jamey.                          
               Unfazed, Jamey trots back to Hogan, who obliges the dog with                         
               another toss of the frisbee.                                                         
                                                                                                    
               Gwen catches up to Diamond.                                                          
                                                                                                    
                                     GWEN                                                           
                         Trouble in paradise?                                                       
                                                                                                    
                                     DIAMOND                                                        
                         Nothing a week in the country won't                                        
                         cure.  Make sure she's not alone.                                          
                                                                                                    
               Diamond turns and heads back toward the wedding party as                             
               the Guests make their way toward a lavish tent.                                      
                                                                                                    
               Gwen dials her cell phone as she watches Ruby climb into                             
               her refined SUV, REV it up, and PEAL out of her parking spot.                        
                                                                                                    
                                     GWEN                                                           
                         Hi Scott.  Gwen.  We need your help.                                       
                                                                                                    
               INT. CABIN -- DAY                                                                    
                                                                                                    
               Ruby sits up in bed talking on her cell.  A lump rests                               
               under the sheets.                                                                    
                                                                                                    
                                     RUBY                                                           
                         She actually said Yenta                                                    
                         Schmenta...of course,  take it.                                            
                                                                                                    
               Ruby clicks off her cell phone and tosses it aside just as                           
               the lump stirs.  From the sheets pops bare chested SCOTT                             
               COHEN, late 30's, reliable and wise, a family heirloom.                              
                                                                                                    
                                     SCOTT                                                          
                              (affected Jewish                                                      
                              accent)                                                               
                         Ahh, my sweet Yenta Schmenta.                                              
                                                                                                    
               He lashes at Ruby, all lips and tongue; she GIGGLES,                                 
               deflecting with a pillow.

n order for your vote to count, you must answer the following question correctly.

WHAT IS THIS STORY'S GENRE?

A) Romantic Comedy
B) Thriller
C) Sci-fi

VOTE by PM and include either ENTRY 8: or TITLE: YENTA in the SUBJECT LINE, along with your answer.

Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

ENTRY 9
TITLE: BLOOD AND BOOKS

HTML:

                 EXT. MANHATTAN SKYLINE -- NIGHT

                 The city shines in all it's nocturnal glory.



                 EXT. CLAUDIO'S RESTAURANT

                 A costume party inside.  VIP GUESTS in every kind of
                 disguise imaginable frolic in a sea of sin and alcohol.

                 Across the street in shadows, a lone figure scans the
                 party through the plate glass window.  He spies his
                 quarry.  Opens a bag...selects his weapon of choice. 
                 Loads it.  Brings it up to aim.  It's a camera.  He
                 smiles.

                                         PHOTOGRAPHER
                           Why Senator Treadway, you've been
                           a bad bad boy.

                 Before he can click the shutter, a SECRET SERVICE GHOST
                 agent pops in front of the view screen.  No words.  A
                 couple of silent, but powerful hits and the Photographer
                 is on the ground.  His camera in pieces.

                                         GHOST
                           Senator's off limits tonight.

                 He talks into a mini-comlink.

                                         GHOST 
                           All clear.  The lizard has been
                           squishified.



                 INT. CLAUDIO'S RESTAURANT

                 GHOST LEADER answers.

                                         GHOST LEADER
                           Excellent.  We're bringing him out
                           now.

                 He motions...SENATOR TREADWAY, Roman Conqueror, escorts a
                 way too young FRENCH MAID toward him.  An AIDE, done up
                 like the Hunchback jumps in.

                                         AIDE
                           Got 'em.

                                         TREADWAY
                           Let's hear it.

                                         AIDE
                           Governor Karns' lead is only three
                           points ahead.  And most favor YOU
                           as the only hope of unseating the
                           Prez.

                                         TREADWAY
                           Nice.  Perfect.  Things are coming
                           together.

                 He caresses the Maid...not so discreetly.

                                         TREADWAY
                           Speaking of coming together, my
                           wife's plane?

                                         AIDE
                           Unfortunately, has a small problem
                           with the hydraulics so she wasn't
                           able to take off.  Better safe
                           than sorry.

                                         TREADWAY
                           That's my motto.

                 He laughs.



                 EXT. ROOFTOP ACROSS FROM CLAUDIO'S

                 POV BINOCULARS: the whole thing has just been witnessed.

                 A dark figure drops the spy glasses.  Opens case. 
                 Selects weapon.  Loads it.  Brings it up to aim.  It's a
                 very odd looking gun.

                                         FIGURE
                           Hamlet, thou art slain.  No
                           medicine in the world can do thee
                           good.  The treacherous instrument
                           is in thy hand, unbated and
                           envenom'd...



                 EXT. CLAUDIO'S RESTAURANT

                 The Senator, his mistress, his aide and the ghosts exit. 
                 A car is waiting.  The door is opened for him.  He
                 laughs.



                 ROOFTOP

                                         FIGURE
                           The King.  The king is to blame.

                 He pulls the trigger.

                                         STREET
                           A dart strikes the Senator's
                           chest.  It startles more than
                           hurts.  The Ghosts snap to
                           attention.  Guns drawn.  One pulls
                           the dart out...but it's too late.

                                         FIGURE
                           Then venom...to thy work.

                 The Senator begins convulsing and foaming at the mouth.

                                         GHOST LEADER
                           Get him out of here.
                                (in comlink)
                           We have a breech.  The Senator is
                           down.  Find the Bogey.

                 Another dart pierces the left eye of the French Maid. 
                 She screams and drops.  The Ghost saw this one.

                                         GHOST LEADER
                                (pointing to roof)
                           There!  Up There.

                 Agents from out of nowhere hit the Figure's position with
                 a hail of bullets.

                                         ROOF
                           The Figure jumps back.  Quickly
                           disassembles his gear and tears
                           off.  Bullets explode all around.

                                         STREET
                           GHOST LEADER

                 Hanrahan!  He's in your building.  Get up to the roof!

                 They shove the Senator in the car.  And it peels off. 
                 The girl is left to die screaming on the street.

                 All the Ghosts head toward the shooter's building.

                                         GHOST LEADER
                           Find Him!

                                         ROOF
                           HANRAHAN explodes through the
                           service door, gun drawn.  The
                           figure is at the edge of the
                           building.

                                         HANRHAN
                           Don't you MOVE.

                 The figure stares at him...eyes blazing.

                                         HANRHAN
                                (to comlink)
                           I've got 'em chief...I...

                 He is silenced forever with a lightning quick knife throw
                 to the jugular.  He drops.

                                         FIGURE
                           A hit! A very palpable hit!

                 Several other Ghosts make it to the service door.  One
                 trips over Hanrahan's body.  The others get a bead on the
                 figure.  GUNS BARK.  The figure attaches a climbing hook
                 to the fire escape ladder and flings himself off the
                 building.

                 The ghosts rush to the edge.  Peer down into the
                 blackness.

                                         GHOST
                           We lost him.

                                         STREET
                           The ghost leader is not happy.

                                         GHOST LEADER
                           FIND HIM!!

                 The girl is still screaming. Violently convusing.

                                         GHOST LEADER
                           Will you shut up.

In order for your vote to count, you must answer the following question correctly.

WHAT IS THIS STORY'S GENRE?

A) Comedy
B) Action Thriller
C) Drama

VOTE by PM and include either ENTRY 9: or TITLE: BLOOD AND BOOKS in the SUBJECT LINE, along with your answer.

Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

ENTRY 10
TITLE: THE GRAVEYARD OF THE ATLANTIC

HTML:

                 FADE IN:



                 TITLE:  1862 -- OFF HAMPTON ROADS, VIRGINIA



                 EXT. ATLANTIC OCEAN, SURFACE - DAY

                 The U.S.S. MONITOR, a grand armored turret gunboat, comes
                 up alongside the ominous looking gunboat U.S.S. VIRGINIA.



                 EXT. U.S.S. MONITOR, LOOKOUT - DAY

                 THOMAS CARROLL, SR., late 30s, a robust sailor, scans the
                 horizon through his binoculars.

                 Gunfire explodes from the U.S.S. Virginia's artillery,
                 seems to come right for him.

                                         THOMAS SR.
                           Holy ****...



                 EXT. ATLANTIC OCEAN, SURFACE - DAY

                 KAPOW! The gunfire slams right into the belly of the
                 U.S.S. Monitor.



                 INT. U.S.S MONITOR, COAL ROOM - DAY

                 YOUNG THOMAS CARROLL, JR., 12, a skinny kid with an eye
                 for trouble throws a piece of coal up in the air and
                 catches it again.

                 ROBERT COOK, 12, a pudgy boy with a kind disposition,
                 watches Young Thomas wearily as he pushes a stack of
                 coal.

                 JOHN MASON, 20, thin with bulging eyes that only bulge
                 more when he's under stress, runs into the coal room,
                 frantic.

                                         JOHN
                           We're going down, boys! Abandon
                           ship!

                 Young Thomas points to CASSIE, a regal black cat, who
                 licks her paws in the corner.

                                         YOUNG THOMAS
                           But I can't leave Cassie!

                 John walks over to Cassie, she raises her tail and hisses
                 as he comes near.

                                         YOUNG THOMAS
                           Please, John!

                 John reaches out his hand to Cassie, she sniffs it and
                 lets her tail loose, comes closer.

                 John picks her up.

                 Young Thomas sighs, relieved.

                 John places Cassie inside a canon.

                                         YOUNG THOMAS
                           What are you doing?

                                         JOHN
                           She'll be safe there. Come on
                           boys. We haven't the time.

                 Robert follows John, but Young Thomas turns, looks at the
                 canon with a glimmer of mischief in his eye.



                 TITLE:  1935 -- OFF CAPE HATTERAS, NORTH CAROLINA



                 EXT. ATLANTIC OCEAN, UNDERWATER - DAY

                 THREE DIVERS investigate a sunken  4-masted schooner. The
                 divers; wearing face masks, snorkels, and swim fins; are
                 only recognizable as two men and a woman.

                 The larger of the two men swims toward the cargo hold of
                 the ship.  He peers  into the darkness.



                 EXT. ATLANTIC OCEAN, SURFACE - DAY

                 CHARLES WILLIAMS, 30, athletic and robust, breaks the
                 surface. As he removes his mask, HELEN WILLIAMS, 23, slim
                 and attractive, comes up behind him. MICHAEL WILLIAMS,
                 19, a paler younger version of Charles comes up last.

                 Together, they turn and swim towards their small,
                 dilapidated, single-masted boat, the "CAROLINA QUEEN."



                 EXT. CAROLINA QUEEN, DECK - NIGHT

                 Charles loosens the sail.

                 The boat's equipment is old, rusty, yet surprisingly
                 modern.

                                         CHARLES
                           What do you think?

                 Michael grins.

                                         MICHAEL
                           The cargo hold was collapsed, but
                           there were definitely bags aboard. 
                           Hard as rocks.

                 Charles nods with a knowing smile.

                                         CHARLES
                           It's the Katherine Monahan.

                                         HELEN
                           It's not the Veturia.

                 Charles shakes his head.

                                         HELEN
                           Look around you, Charles. The
                           whole country has gone to hell and
                           we're out here.

                 She motions to the open ocean.

                                         HELEN
                           Hunting ships that donÍt exist.

                                         CHARLES
                           Listen to me, Helen, we find the
                           ghost ship, we find the Monitor.
                           We find the Monitor, we get the
                           reward.

                 The motor noise comes to a SCREECHING halt.

                 Michael surveys the boat, chipped paint, rusty equipment,
                 and all.

                                         MICHAEL
                           We really could use the reward.

                 In the distance, Michael spots the "CASSIE II," a nice
                 sized sailboat.



                 EXT. CASSIE II, DECK - NIGHT

                 Charles and Michael each offer Helen a helping hand as
                 she climbs aboard.

                 THOMAS CARROLL, JR., 80s, a stocky old man, his long
                 white hair tied back in the fashion of an old world
                 sailor, saliently observes them from the stern - his
                 perpetual leaning post.

                                         THOMAS
                           You kids better be careful
                           meandering around in the open
                           ocean with a boat like that.

                                         CHARLES
                           The boat's all we've got. Where'd
                           you get your sea legs old man?

                                         THOMAS
                           I was a crewman most of my life.

                 Charles looks at him in disbelief.

                 Thomas turns his nose up at him.

                                         THOMAS
                           Good honest work. What do you do?

                                         CHARLES
                           I'm a hunter. I aim to be the man
                           who finds the U.S.S. Monitor.

                                         THOMAS
                           I aimed to make pigs fly.
                           MonitorÍs lost to the graveyard of
                           the Atlantic, son. But maybe
                           you'll have better luck.

                 Just then, Cassie (the black cat) walks past. She rubs
                 against Thomas' leg and then moves onto Charles.

                 Charles is dumbstruck, doesn't know what to do with
                 himself as Cassie purrs on.

                                         HELEN
                           You keep that black cat for luck?

                                         THOMAS
                           Oh Cassie? She and I have been
                           through a lot together.

                 Thomas reaches down to pet Cassie.

                                         THOMAS
                           You're a lucky girl, ain't you?

In order for your vote to count, you must answer the following question correctly.

WHAT IS THIS STORY'S GENRE?

A) Comedy
B) Historical Fantasy
C) Drama

VOTE by PM and include either ENTRY 10: or TITLE: GRAVEYARD in the SUBJECT LINE, along with your answer.

Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

ENTRY 11:
TITLE: DEAD END JOBS

HTML:

                 FADE IN:



                 INT. HIGH SCHOOL COMPUTER LAB -- DAY

                 SETH, a lanky, bored student sits at a keyboard in the
                 computer lab.  Others are busy, Seth just looks around. 
                 He moves the mouse and clicks the 'Print' icon, then
                 pushes away from the desk and walks to a line at the
                 printer.  In front of him is GINA, a nice looking new
                 girl.  She looks the papers over, turns, then smiles at
                 Seth.

                                         GINA
                           Hi, I'm Gina.  Oh, sorry, I picked
                           up yours by mistake. Ten most
                           dangerous jobs, you have
                           interesting goals in life.

                 RICHARD, good looking, expensive clothes, stuck up, grabs
                 the papers from Gina, looks them over then smirks at
                 Seth.

                                         RICHARD
                           Looks like you'll be working for
                           me.

                 Gina grabs the papers back and hands them to Seth.

                                         GINA
                           At least he'll be working in a
                           man's job.  What was your
                           aptitude, lingerie store manikin?

                 She storms off, Seth smiles at Richard, scratches his eye
                 using only his middle finger and returns to his computer.



                 EXT. CITY STREETS -- DAY

                 SETH saunters up to a high rise office building
                 construction site, bustling with activity.  He looks down
                 at his list.

                                         SETH
                           Steel worker.

                 Looks back up as a steel beam swings free and drops on a
                 WORKMAN, squashing him.  People run to help as GINA walks
                 up and stops by his side.

                                         GINA
                           Do you think he'll be OK?

                                         SETH
                           If he's going to heaven.  What are
                           you doing here?

                 She holds up a folded computer printout like his.

                                         GINA
                           Career stuff, same as you.  You
                           going to be a steel worker?

                 Seth looks at the people pulling the workman from under
                 the beam, then up at the steel workers straining hard
                 above.

                                         SETH
                           Maybe not, too much heavy labor.

                 He looks at his list and walks away.



                 EXT. CITY STREETS -- LATER

                 SETH walks to an electric company utility truck.  He
                 ignores the orange cones and moves to stare into a dark
                 hole.  He hears something and turns to find GINA standing
                 next to him.

                                         GINA
                           Electrical power repair man?

                                         SETH
                           You here for career research too?

                 She nods and is about to speak when the crackle of
                 electricity is heard and sparks fly up.  Inside a MAN
                 shrieks in pain.

                                         SETH
                           I don't think so.

                                         GINA
                           I'll call for help.

                 She grabs her cell phone, Seth walks off shaking his
                 head.



                 EXT. IN FRONT OF SETH'S HOUSE -- EARLY MORNING

                 The sound of a garbage truck working its way closer.  The
                 front door opens and SETH walks out hold a box of
                 PopTarts.  He pulls out the last bag and opens it. He
                 looks at the truck as it stops in front of his house.

                                         SETH
                                (mispronouncing)
                           Refuse collectors.

                 He looks the filthy workers over, grimaces, then walks to
                 the curb and throws the empty box in the back of the
                 truck.  He steps out of the way as a GARBAGEMAN drags a
                 trash can to the truck.  Seth looks him over and wrinkles
                 his nose.

                                         SETH
                           Do they make you wear that suit?

                                         GARBAGEMAN
                           Yep, it's our uniform.

                 Seth steps back as the truck moves to the next house.

                                         SETH
                           Dude, I wouldn't be caught dead
                           dressed like that.

                 A car drives up, window down.  GINA's head pops out.

                                         SETH 
                           Career stuff or are you stalking
                           me?

                 She smiles and waves her paper at him.

                                         GINA
                           I guess it looks like I'm a
                           stalker, no really, it is for my
                           career counseling appointment this
                           morning.

                                         SETH
                           Yeah, mine's tomorrow.  Did they
                           really say that you should be a
                           steel worker or garbageman?

                 She starts to speak when the garbage truck revs its motor
                 loudly, one of the workers pulls a lever and the big
                 metal blade starts to scoop the trash inside of the
                 truck.

                 ANOTHER GARBAGEMAN dumpS a can then slips.  He grabs the
                 truck as he falls and the metal blade starts to drag him
                 screaming into the truck. Gina gasps then pulls out a
                 cell phone.

                                         GINA
                           I'll call for help.

                 Seth nods then walks closer to get a better look.  As he
                 checks it out, COUNSELOR STEVE'S voice is heard.

                                         COUNSELOR STEVE (V.O.)
                           Really, you want to know which is
                           best, dying by falling off a roof
                           or in a plane crash?



                 INT. SCHOOL COUNSELOR'S OFFICE -- MORNING

                 COUNSELOR STEVE sits behind A desk, black glasses,
                 outstretched legs show white socks with black pants and
                 shoes.  He questions SETH, his comments pick up from the
                 previous voice over.

                                         COUNSELOR STEVE
                           Do I have to clean up the mess?

                                         SETH
                           Really, I'm working out my future
                           here.

                                         COUNSELOR STEVE
                           This is how you're going to decide
                           it?

                 Seth nods decisively.  Steve delicately holds the ripped
                 and folded paper.

                                         COUNSELOR STEVE
                           Why did you cross these out?

                 Seth stares back blankly.

                                         COUNSELOR STEVE 
                           What's wrong with taxi driver?

                 Seth springs to life, grabbing an imaginary steering
                 wheel.

                                         SETH
                           It's like this!  I'd be driving
                           this guy around; some dark, mean
                           SOB, and he'd say something snide
                           about my driving.  And I'd meet
                           his eyes in the rear view mirror
                           like this.
                                (stares at Steve)
                           Then he'd pull out a gun and BANG!

                 Steve jumps and Seth settles back.

                                         SETH 
                           See, obvious.
                                (thinks a second)
                           Did Gina have taxi driver too?

                 Steve now looks confused.

                                         COUNSELOR STEVE
                           Gina?  No, hers were, let's see,
                           doctor, grief counselor.  She
                           followed you to see what they
                           would be like.

                 Seth looks confused and a little shocked.

                                         COUNSELOR STEVE 
                           She asked about you too.  I think
                           she likes you, ask her out before
                           Richard does.

                                         SETH
                           Richard?

                                         COUNSELOR STEVE
                           Yeah, hers is the only family
                           around richer than his.

In order for your vote to count, you must answer the following question correctly.

WHAT IS THIS STORY'S GENRE?

A) Action
B) Comedy
C) Drama

VOTE by PM and include either ENTRY 11: or TITLE: DEAD END JOBS in the SUBJECT LINE, along with your answer.

Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

ENTRY 12
TITLE: DEADLINE

HTML:

                 FADE IN:



                 EXT. CITY STREET -- NIGHT

                 Made slick by torrential rain.

                 A menacing black car pulls up next to a  phone booth,
                 across  from a large building.



                 INT. BLACK CAR -- CONTINOUS

                 JOEY VREES, 35, a massive heap of a man, is seated behind
                 the wheel.

                                         JOEY
                           Ok, here we go.

                 Joey exits the car.



                 INT. PHONE BOOTH -- CONTINOUS

                 Joey, now drenched in rain, enters the booth.

                 He quickly dials a number he has long ago memorized.

                                         JOEY
                                (into the phone)
                           Ya, I'm here. Yes I know. The
                           letter. And the fifty. Yes ma'am.

                                         JOEY
                                (beat)
                           I love you too.

                 Joey hangs up the phone with a grin.

                 He pulls a small business card out of his pocket, and
                 stares at it as he dials another number into the phone.

                 He listens intently as the phone rings.

                                         JOEY
                           C'mon, c'mon, pickup already.

                                         JOHNNY
                                (on the other end of
                                 the phone)
                           Krugar Investigations. You lost
                           it, we'll find it. 

                 Joey quickly hangs the phone up.

                                         JOEY
                                (to himself)
                           Good. He's in.



                 EXT. CITY STREET -- CONTINOUS

                 Joey exits the phonebooth and runs across the street
                 towards the building.

                 He throws the door open and enters.



                 INT. HALLWAY -- MOMENTS LATER

                 Joey stumbles up the stairs, his large body too big to
                 handle, now completly soaked.

                                         JOEY
                           Who in the world wants an office
                           on the top floor?!?

                 Joey peers down the hallway and relief floods his
                 features as he spots the office of 'J.KRUGER.'

                                         JOEY
                                (to himself)
                           Finally. This prick better accept
                           this offer; I know I just didn't
                           climb all this way to give him
                           fifty bucks.



                 INT. OUTER OFFICE -- CONTINOUS

                 Joey enters the empty outer office and stares at the mess
                 that clutters the desk.

                                         JOEY
                                (to himself)
                           Looks like he needs the work too.

                 Joey walks over to the official door of Johnny Kruger's
                 office, and places one meaty paw on the doorknob.

                                         JOEY
                                (to himself)
                           Ok, gameface.

                 Joey's normally grinning, quirky smile fades; his mug
                 becomes a granite slab.

                 Joey swings the door open with caution, and peers into
                 the dark office.

                                         JOHNNY (O.S.)
                           Glad you could drop by. Nice
                           weather we're having, huh? 

                 Joey reaches into his coat for the note.

                 In a blinding flash, six bullet holes rip into Joey's
                 chest.

                 Joey grabs his chest and stumbles backwards, finally
                 collapsing in a heap that shakes the building.

                 JOHNNY, 30, appears in the doorway of the office, a
                 revolver in the belt of his pants; he is staring at the
                 fallen Joey.

                 Johnny walks over to the secretary's desk and picks up
                 the phone, dials.

                                         JOHNNY
                                (into the phone)
                           Sergeant Novello, please. Mr.
                           Johnny Krugar calling. Yes I'll
                           hold.

                 Johnny bends down and examines what Joey was reaching
                 for: an envelope, with Johnny's name on it.

                                         JOHNNY
                                (into the phone)
                           Hey Tony, it's Johnny Krugar. So
                           guess what? I'm looking at a three
                           hundred pound lump of muscle lying
                           dead on my carpet with six slugs
                           in its heart.

                 An angry voice buzzes in Johnny's ear as he examines the
                 envelope.

                                         JOHNNY
                                (into the phone)
                           Never saw him before. He opened
                           the door, drew a gun and took a
                           shot at me. Well I didn't feel
                           like pausing for an introduction.
                           Old faithful jumped into my hand
                           and I let him have it.

                 Johnny pours the contents of the envelope out into one
                 hand as he listens to the angry voice.

                 A sheet of paper with a clipped fifty dollar bill appears
                 in his hand. A small glass vial of a liquid also slips
                 into his hand.

                 Johnny reads the letter with interest at first, but this
                 grows into concern the more he reads.

                                         JOHNNY
                           What the...

                 Suddenly the glass vial that was in his hand slips out
                 and comes crashing to the floor. The liquid splatters.

                                         JOHNNY
                                (into the phone)
                           Ya, I'm still here, I just, uh,
                           can I call you back?

                 Johnny stares with worry at the liquid on the floor, and
                 prepares to hang the phone up.

                 SUDDENLY the corpse of Joey LASHES out at Johnny's ankle!

                 Joey bites, HARD, into Johnny's tendon and blood explodes
                 everywhere, showering the room.

                 Johnny screams in anguish and falls down, dropping the
                 phone.

                                         NOVELLO
                                (on the other end of
                                 the phone)
                           What? What is it? KRUGER?!?

                 Johnny is wimpering on the blood smeared ground as the
                 corpse of Joey crawls towards him. Joey is smiling now,
                 he is ready for dinner.

                                         JOHNNY
                           Awww, ****.

                 Joey pounces on the detective, ripping into flesh,
                 devouring it greedily.

                 Johnny screams in agony. His wailing is heard throughout
                 the night.

                 A shred of the paper with the clipped fifty dollar bill
                 floats in the air. It reads: "-ncluded a sample of the
                 virus that infected my husband. Hope you can use it to
                 determin--"



                 EXT. CITY STREET -- NIGHT

                 All goes silent in the office of the late Johnny Kruger.
                 The night becomes quiet, the torrential rain drowning all
                 sound.

                 Yet somewhere in the distance the wail of a police siren
                 is heard.

In order for your vote to count, you must answer the following question correctly.

WHAT IS THIS STORY'S GENRE?

A) Thriller
B) Comedy
C) Drama

VOTE by PM and include either ENTRY 12: or TITLE: DEADLINE in the SUBJECT LINE, along with your answer.

Joe Calabrese · Oct 27, 2005

HELLO VOTERS.

VOTING ENDS on Sunday, November 6th, 2005 - MIDNIGHT (EST)

THE END IS HERE!
THE FINAL TASK TO DETERMINE
Who can handle a spec, a synopsis and a rewrite.

WHO is THE ULTIMATE SCREENWRITER?

Here is the criteria for judging.

PICK the MOST FAVORITE based on:

1. How well it is written. Does it make you want to read on?

2. Is the GENRE CLEAR? You will need to answer the genre question correctly in order for the vote to count. I made it pretty easy though.

3. If you wish, compare them to TASK 1 entries of the same title to see if it is better than the original (or ruined), however this is not a requirement for judging since it is a lot of pages to read.

You can read TASK 1 entries HERE.

(NOTE

If you do compare, indicate your brief thoughts in the PM as it may skew the votes.

VOTING ENDS on Sunday, November 6th, 2005 - MIDNIGHT (EST)

THANK YOU ENTRANTS for your HARD WORK

AND

THANK YOU VOTERS AS WELL!

Joe Calabrese · Nov 7, 2005

THE VOTES are tallied and the WINNERS are...

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Before I tell you, let me tell you all how proud I am of the hard work and talent you all put into it.

The voting was tough and it was close, in fact very very close with multiple ties, but we now do have winners and they are...

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First let me tell you how the winners were determined.

For all three tasks, entries were voted by your peers and each vote counted as one point.
At the end of all three tasks the top three entrants would be the winners.

However, I because of the ties, I gave bonus points for the winners of each individual task, with
3 points for first place,
2 points for second
and 1 point for third place in each task.

Winners of TASK 1
1st place = Rainy Night
2nd Place = Brian James
3rd place = Stegosaurus

Winners of TASK 2
1st place Tie= Rainy Night & Brian James
2nd Place Tie = NikeeGoddess, Nidorina & Aldenard
3rd place Tie = Stephanie76, dpaterso , Stegosaurus & Green Chair

Winners of TASK 3
1st place = dpaterso
2nd Place Tie= Aldenard, Dichucks, NikeeGoddess, & Sukee
3rd place Tie = Rainy Night & Green Chair

Based on individual task bonus points and overall points for all three tasks,
the PRIZE WINNERS ARE...

3rd PLACE WINNER
who wins the Adobe Acrobat, HCD, ScriptPIMP and Scr(i)pt Magazine subscription package worth over $200 is... DPATERSO

2nd PLACE RUNNER UP
who wins the Final Draft, ScriptPIMP, Inktip Package worth over $375 is... BRIAN JAMES

And the Ultimate Screenwriter who wins a $750+ package from the Movie Magic and ScriptPIMP people is... RAINY NIGHT!

Winners will be notified in order to claim their prizes and all Entrants will recieve info on how to get a Scr(i)pt Magazine Discount.

Congrats to all the winners, entrants and voters.

I will send emails over the next few weeks to all entrants, giving them my personal critique and standings in all three tasks and tips to improve their writing. Again, it was a close race and all entrants should be proud of their accomplishment.

It's been a fun two months.

Goodnight and Goodbye.

Joseph Calabrese

StephieM · Nov 7, 2005

CONGRADULATIONS to Rainy Night, Brian James, and Dp. A job well done and prizes well deserved.

Steph

dpaterso · Nov 7, 2005

Thanks!

Thanks a bunch, Joe, for organizing this contest and for your personal comments on my entries. And thanks to everyone, writers and voters, for making the contest interesting and fun.

Hearty congrats to the winners! Damn good prizes! I'm very happy with mine. Commiserations to the "losers" (I use the term loosely) but just think of the great practice you've had at writing to theme and to deadline, two of the most important skills a writer can hope to develop.

'Fess up, who turned my Noir epic into a zombie Horror-fest? What the heck, I liked it!

Joe's "accidentally" assigning me the opening I was most allergic to (Extinct - Entry 1) made me laugh out loud. I hope the author didn't object too much to my edit.

-Derek
My wittle web page - hack stories, failed novels, dud screenplays, terminal writer's block.
The fool, the meddling idiot. As though his ape's brain could contain the secrets of the Krell.

Rainy Night · Nov 7, 2005

I posted a thank you in a new thread - but I'd like to say it again, what a great contest and thanks for everything.

In round 3 I re-wrote The Naked Ape - which was one of my favorite scripts from that round. I really loved the dialogue, and being a Monty Python fan I could not resist trying to push it in that direction.

And I'm just curious as to who re-wrote mine, The Cat from Cahaba.

Joe Calabrese · Nov 7, 2005

Brian James Rewrote the "Cat" and did a pretty good job IMHO.

Green Chair · Nov 7, 2005

Thanks, Joe, for organizing and supervising this. No small task.... Now rest up and take good care of yourself!

Congrats to the Top Three! It was an amazing pool of talent; thanks for letting me play along.

I had most fun with the rewrite. YENTA was a fave of mine, and I enjoyed having the opportunity to give it a complete twist. Hope the author didn't mind too much. I thought I'd just play into every nightmare we as writers have...seeing a completely different story emerge from our original words.

Cheers,
Green Chair, aka Dana
-----
PS If you're in the neighborhood, I've just opened a new web log after attending a weekend workshop: http://greenchairpictures.blogspot.com/

Aldenard · Nov 7, 2005

Wow, I'm surprised! I honestly didn't think I would get any votes at all in the last two rounds (because I myself didn't vote, and i assumed that would be the only way i would get votes)

That was me that turned Deadline into a zombie screenplay, i bet the original author is mad at me for butchering his work. Sorry 'bout that, but I just wanted to spice it up a bit, y'know?

Thanks so much everyone for this wondeful experience. Even though I may have 'lost' it doesn't feel that way. I gained wonderful experience and helpful critique on all of the rounds, and enjoyed reading the works of others.

I would like to sincerly congradulate the winners, yall really deserved it. Well, gatta run now, it's my mom's birthday and I'm taking her out to dinner. See ya around.

scripter1 · Nov 7, 2005

Congrats

to everyone that placed and to Rainy for winning.

I really enjoyed reading the great varity of work displayed here.

Aldenard · Nov 7, 2005

Uhm...ok...

Hey, I do have one question that I hope someone can asnwer for me. I hope this isn't nickpicking, but im just very curious about this. I suppose Im misunderstanding the rules, but I bet yall can clear this up for me.

Ok, so its 3 pts for 1st? 2 for 2nd? and 1 for 3rd? right?

Ok, I agree with Rainy Night and Brian James taking 1st and 2nd, respectivly, but 3rd place is where my issue lies.

dpaterso got (according to the scoring system) 4 points (1 for 3rd place on the 2nd part, 3 points for 1st place on the 3rd part)

Well, it appears that Nikee Goddess and I also recieved 4 points (we each placed 2nd in the last two rounds).

So how did dpaterso get third? To me, it appears to be a three-way-tie. I imagine that I missed something, but I just thought I would check and make sure there wasn't a mistake made.

FINAL TASK - The Rewrite.

Joe Calabrese

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StephieM

back in action!

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