First stand-up routine....funny or disgusting?

Hello,



I’m doing my first stand-up “open mic” and most likely last. It was a dare originally and now the time is coming closer I wanted to ask a few of you experienced ones you’re opinion.



One experience I was thinking of sharing:



I woke up one morning after dancing with my girlfriends all night to find this large salivating dog between my knees. When I tried to push it away it growled so fiercely I froze and started praying. Too make a long story short I did manage to get out of the room and luckily he never had his way. When I finally was able to part my legs it was like opening a grill cheese sandwich.

Any opinions?

maestrowork said:

It's okay... but not particularly funny. What's the punchline? You always need a punchline...

How about this:

This morning I woke up after a little hanky-panky with my girlfriend all night and find this large, drooling [make drooling, growling face] dog between my legs. I tried to push it away, but it growled even more romantically and I froze. I'm an athiest but I started to pray. Anyway, I did manage to get out of the room and he never had his way with me. But then I looked down between my legs... let's just say I can never eat grilled cheese again...

Click to expand...

Too funny. I can't stop laughing. I sent this to my girlfriend and her
sides are splitting.