How Would You Write This?

Gardenia31 · May 1, 2010

How would you write a character who makes a statement (V.0.) and chuckles? For instance:

Jackson (V.O.)
A very interesting set of circumstances, he, he.

Or would you write it:

Jackson (V.O.)
A very interesting set of circumstances. (chuckle)

What the heck am I doing wrong, little miss insecurity!

Celia Cyanide · May 1, 2010

I would write the second one. The first is especially jarring since I read "he" and I immediately think of the actual word, and not the sound you make when you chuckle.

dpaterso · May 2, 2010

I'd write it as,

JACKSON (V.O.)
A very interesting set of circumstances.

He chuckles.

-Derek

nmstevens · May 2, 2010

dpaterso said:
I'd write it as,

JACKSON (V.O.)
A very interesting set of circumstances.

He chuckles.

-Derek

I'd do it this way as well.

NMS

How Would You Write This?

Gardenia31

Celia Cyanide

Joker Groupie

dpaterso

Also in our Discord and IRC chat channels

nmstevens

What happened?