Who squashed my inspiration?

Was it you? Oops, nope, it's me. I hate to say it, but I'm experiencing my first bout of viciously stubborn writers block. I've had the stand-stills in difficult parts of stories before, but I've never been idea-less...until now. Usually, once I'm wrapping up one manuscript, another idea is already pounding in my brain, waiting to leap onto the screen, not this time. I think I know why.

Anxiety has greedily gobbled up my creativity. Rude! Here's my life in a nutshell: Get up at the buttcrack of dawn, make lots of coffee, send hubby off to work (he's in the Army), dishes, laundry, drag two small children out of bed and supervise bathing and dressing (which can turn into an all-out war). Make breakfast, pack lunches, find out "Not me" is the one who used grape jelly to create the master mural on the kitchen wall. Send kids to school. Ah, breath. Load up on caffine and nicotine. Sit down, write, rewrite, edit, read, research. Get kids off bus, promise bus driver I will talk to my six year old son about his trying to 'surf' on the seat while the bus is moving. Assure my daughter's teacher that I will talk to my girl about her correcting the teacher in front of the class (it's hard to have an 8 yr old smarter than you are...trust me). Swirl around kitchen like tornado, trying to make a semi-edible dinner. Run out side, scold son for trying to skateboard off roof, and scold evily smiling daughter for giving him the idea in the first place...and so on. This is normal, all good...I can write with this life. Here's my hang up.

My hsuband will soon be deployed to Iraq, and though I won't admit it to those closest to me...I'm freaking out. I already have two brothers deployed, but I'm not too worried...one's in med and away from the action, the other's MI (intellegence) and they keep him pretty secure. My hubby, on the other hand, is a gunner on a humvee, and when he's not manning the 50-cal, he is toting a specialized rifle. Yep, he's a sniper, and a dang good one, so they like to send him on a lot of ops. Oh yea! I was fine until the offical word came down and they set a date to deploy. Now, I'm brain-locked.

My mind has never been the epitome of brilliance, but now it's a mushy mass of worry. I get ideas, but they (like my chest after two kids) fall flat. (Sorry, couldn't resist) I'd love to be in the midst of writing a consuming story, right now I could use the distraction...but it's just not happening. Any suggestions?

Thanks everyone, for your support! Sorry, I didn't answer right away. I was reassuring my children that it is not ok to say "A**" even when you are refering to a donkey. Dang that Shrek 2

Scfirence~ thanks for reassurance. I do plan on curling up with a good book (and my hubby while I still can) and just trying to take it easy and let my mind relax. As for my hubby being the god of snipers...he'd just love to hear you say that! He's already pretty confidant in his ablities, but I might go ahead and pass on your quip just to boost that ego up one more notch.

Saritams8~ thanks for all the helpful links and the hugs!

GPatten~ Yeah, I guess these type of worries do stump the mind. Glad to here you've had friends make it home safe and sound and thanks for the prayers and wishes.

JAlpha~ If there's one thing I'm great at, it's worrying about things that I have absolutely no control over. And yes, being in control of what I write and when I'm writing does make sense...to me anyway. Maybe our mushy brains think alike...who knows. Anyway, thanks for your blessings and advice.

James~ that's a great idea! I will pass on your message to my husband, and I know he'll appreciate it. Thanks!

Everyone has been so kind, and even has managed to put up with my off-beat humor. Thanks for everything. You have no idea how much it helps to recieve your feedback and support.
Hmm, that was a mysterious 'bang'. I think my kids are paging me. I'll check back later.

Nateskate~ That was so sweet and encouraging. You're going to make me get all sappy! Thanks.

JAlpha~ I will keep everyone posted. Since I don't really talk about this much, this thread is dang near theraputic. Thank you.

Jamesaritchie~ You're right, only the best of the best are condemned er..privilaged to be snipers. And I have a confession (you a priest? doubt it, but oh well)...I'm bordering on obssessive in my drive to succeed as a writer. Here's why...My hubby's talents haven't gone unoticed and SF is practically drooling over him. He's been very good and declined thus far, but they're dangeling an awfully big carrott in front of him. I want to have a solid start in the writing industry by the time it's time for him to re-up so that he gets out of the Army. It's me against SF (cue Rocky music). Dada, dun, dada, dun. I may be little (I perfer vertically challenged), but I'm quick. I write for the love of writing...and now to keep my love safe and home with me--eventually. I know, I'm putting undo pressure on myself to get published. But what's one (specifically this one) to do?

Hey, this is great. I just 'talked' all through lunch and didn't get in trouble for talking with my mouth full, though I did get peanut butter on my keyboard. Dang.

Thank you all for your advice, concern, and lending your ears (eyes in this case). I'm still open to any and all comments. I look forward to checking this thread and seeing familiar and new faces. Again, thanks for your contribution to my fragile sanity!

Icerose~ thanks. I guess I haven't been very clear on where exactly I am in the publishing game (my bad- sorry). I have manuscripts done and one currently in the hands of considering agents, though, through experience I've come to expect long-awatied rejections, polite of course. I'm awaiting word on my current ms, which is sooo fun as most of you know. I find biting my nails down to bluddy stumps and banging my head against a brick wall a pleasurable alternative to awaiting a response.

Sorry it's taken a while for me to check in. I'll just say my kids thought up some interesting ways to keep me busy...ones that put the skateboarding-off-the-roof thing to shame. Anyway, everyone resurfaced with minimal injuries...so that's good.

Icerose~ Yep, writer's know about 'the waiting.' We must be crazy to willfully do this to ourselves...Thanks for the support.

Jackie106~ I never thought about submitting to newspapers or magazines. Usually, my turning everything into a joke gets me in trouble, but maybe I could spin it into something productive. Or a blog, huh? There's that little voice inside my head saying, Me? Uh, don't know if I've got the right stuff for it. But you, and others, have really given me something to consider. Kind of scary and exciting. Thanks for your ideas and best wishes.

aspiringwriter~ I used to have the 'too many ideas' problem, and now they all ran away. Little cretins! Anyhoo, I'll keep my chin up and smile (but not too big because I've just discovered little lines around my eyes and mouth...and they stand out when I smile .

rosewood~ I can't believe I made people laugh. That usuall only happens when I do something stupid, like walk right into an 'automatic' door that doesn't open and knock myself out (yep, actually happened to me...in Wal-mart...I woke up to dozens of concerned eyes staring at me, my husband's included, then he tried supressing his giggles and the whole crowd started laughing...not my shining moment). Maybe I will go to the base and see if can write for their little paper. Thanks for your encouragement.

Bufty~ Yeah, I guess I just need to give it time. I've got a lot going on so I guess it's normal to feel a bit overwhelmed. It sure does help to have all this support though, so thanks.

Aruna~ Don't you hate it when someone else says exactly what you wanted to? Thanks for the great wishes and support!

You all have no idea how much this thread has helped me. Even my husband noticed a change in me. You've really lifted my spirits and given me some new ideas to focus on. Thanks so much! This is like free 'writing therapy!' I love it!