How much detail in first chapter?

MMcDonald64 · Apr 29, 2009

I'm having a hard time with my first chapter. I posted it here in the SYW area, and had some wonderful feedback that made sense and I implemented much of it. However, a couple of people since then have read it and are asking questions that seem to want me to explain everything out that I mention. For me, I think of those questions as necessary to keep the reader interested enough to continue reading. I want them to wonder at least somewhat. I don't want them foundering and wondering what the heck is going on, and I don't think that's the case as most of the questions refer to adding backstory. But, if I did that, it would slow the flow of the chapter down a lot, and none of that is really necessary right away, at least I didn't think so, but I could be wrong. I do reveal backstory in subsequent chapters, but should I put it right up front instead?

I've always heard not to give information until the reader needs to know it...but my question is, when is that?

DeleyanLee · Apr 29, 2009

You don't want to explain everything in the first chapter. Take the questions you're getting about the first chapter as a sign that the reader is interested and would keep reading. Then make certain you answer those questions at some point in the book.

When a question needs to be answered is totally unique to the story. Tell your story. Make them wonder (and keep reading). Answer all their questions before you finish the book and they'll be happy.

Gillhoughly · Apr 29, 2009

No need to reinvent the wheel, just grab up a few dozen of your favorite books and see how THOSE writers handled their first chapters.

Since you've read the books and know what happens next, you can see how much info they presented in their openings and get a better sense of how to do it yourself!

cwfgal · Apr 29, 2009

It's good to pique interest in the first chapter and avoid backstory. Just don't overdo it -- too much "piquing" will leave your readers piqued to distraction. If readers are asking questions it means they're curious and interested, so you've succeeded in pulling them in.

Beth

caitysdad · Apr 29, 2009

if you explain everything in the first chapter, then what happens with the rest? Hooks are good, but there's a difference between a hook and not knowing what's going on?

dawinsor · Apr 29, 2009

It's hard to judge without seeing your chapter, but sometimes when people say "tell me more," it means you're doing something right.

GeorgieB · Apr 29, 2009

You don't want to explain everything in the first chapter, but you do need hooks to lure the reader on.

There are two great books on my shelf. The first is "The First Five Pages" by Noah Lukeman. The other is Lew Hnter's "Screenwriting 434". The premise in both is that you must somehow simultaneously put out enough information to pique the reader's interest and also omit enough to fill the later pages, and you have a remarkably short amount space to do both.

miles · Apr 29, 2009

First chapters are tough for most writers. I've read blogs by bestselling authors that detail how difficult they find them.

I spent ninety-percent of my writing time on my first couple of chapters in my last novel. Once I had them right, the rest went very quickly.

In other words, I don't think there's any secret formula. It's a balance between not confusing the reader and not giving too much away. Finding that balance may take time, but don't fret it. Hooking the reader is the toughest part IMO, but also the most important. Once a reader's hooked, you can get away with a lot because they're going to stick with you until the end (even if there's some things they don't really like at some points).

So, take your time. Get the beginning right. Or write the rest and come back to to beginning. Just realize that the trouble you're having is not uncommon, even for those who've been doing this their entire life.

Juliette Wade · Apr 29, 2009

I'd say, try to focus your opening so that it places your protagonist in the optimal place of conflict, where his or her reactions (emotional and judgmental) to the action can give meaningful hints about the backstory. But don't try to explain anything up front. The stuff you should explain is anything that is critical to people being able to understand what's going on. This is more critical when you're in fantasy or science fiction and you have the additional information burden associated with worldbuilding. I'm discussing it with a workshop on my blog right now, here, if you're curious.

cbenoi1 · Apr 29, 2009

With Sci-Fi and Fantasy, you want to set a baseline of what is acceptable and normal in your first chapter. If your novel is about is about witches, show a witch in your first chapter. Don't wait until the middle of the book for your MC to see some shadowy streak across the sky. And remember that baseline and backstory are two different things. The difficulty is weaving backstory info and a hook into the text.

Look at the opening of Star Wars: A New Hope. Two ships shooting at each other, laser pistol mahem as one gets boarded, and a villain who kills with great ease. It demonstrates what is acceptable and normal in this particular world. The hook? The secret plans are placed in a robot, which manages to make a clean escape. The hunt is on. Heck of a hook, imho. Backstory about the Force and the Jedi order and how Darth Vador came to be? Weaved in as the story progresses. Even Darth Vador's story is not fully developped in A New Hope and it's not that important for Luke's story.

-cb

Stijn Hommes · Apr 29, 2009

I recommend going back to the betas and get more detailed feedback. What did they not understand that they should have and what did they think was overexplained. The things they think are overexplained might just be candidates for removal...

MMcDonald64 · Apr 29, 2009

Gillhoughly said:
No need to reinvent the wheel, just grab up a few dozen of your favorite books and see how THOSE writers handled their first chapters.

Since you've read the books and know what happens next, you can see how much info they presented in their openings and get a better sense of how to do it yourself!

Good idea. I've been doing that with books I'm currently reading but didn't think to do it with ones I had already read.

scribbler1382 · Apr 29, 2009

And don't introduce too many characters in the first chapter. As Lukeman says, when you go to a party and are introduced to 20 people as soon as you step in the door, how many of those names do you remember later?

FOTSGreg · Apr 29, 2009

Hi, Juiette (waves).

MMcDonald64, The purpose of your first chapter is to hook your readers and get them interested in going on to the next chapter. You need action, not background, in any sense of the word. You cannot devote a single wasted word to telling the reader what a character thinks, what his background is, what he thinks about love or life or politics or whatever.

HOOK your reader first. Fill them in on the background later and gradually as you lay out your world.

MMcDonald64 · Apr 29, 2009

cbenoi1 said:
With Sci-Fi and Fantasy, you want to set a baseline of what is acceptable and normal in your first chapter. If your novel is about is about witches, show a witch in your first chapter. Don't wait until the middle of the book for your MC to see some shadowy streak across the sky. And remember that baseline and backstory are two different things. The difficulty is weaving backstory info and a hook into the text.

Look at the opening of Star Wars: A New Hope. Two ships shooting at each other, laser pistol mahem as one gets boarded, and a villain who kills with great ease. It demonstrates what is acceptable and normal in this particular world. The hook? The secret plans are placed in a robot, which manages to make a clean escape. The hunt is on. Heck of a hook, imho. Backstory about the Force and the Jedi order and how Darth Vador came to be? Weaved in as the story progresses. Even Darth Vador's story is not fully developped in A New Hope and it's not that important for Luke's story.

-cb

Great example, and in fact, I'm getting lots of wonderful replies here. (not getting my email notifications though--only two out of all these replies, or I'd have been back sooner. lol)

My story does have a sci-fi twist, but it's not like building a whole world. Just a device that has the magical property of allowing my main character to see somethings in the very near future. He has no control over what future events he sees, but he can change that future sometimes. Thanks to some advice in the SYW thread, I added a few paragraphs that have the MC changing something right away. It's a minor save, but gives the reader the idea of what happens. Then, about fourth paragraph down, the character's life changes forever when something related to his magical device gets him in deep trouble.

I only touch on how he came by the device in that chapter. In chapter three, I think, I go into it in more detail, but I'm getting people wanting to know more about it and how it works in the very first chapter.

So, that's where my confusion lies. I can't see how I can work in more backstory without pushing back the life altering moment, which is my hook in the story.

NatJM · Apr 29, 2009

As a reader, I might get turned off if there was something that seems very illogical in the first chapter but I enjoy having questions about certain aspects, as long as I can think of possible reasons why this happens (and the icing on the cake is when the actual back story is better than the one I had imagined).

Reading a novel is partially an imaginative experience, and different readers will have/want different levels of imagination but the point is you don't have to explain everything right away.

Matera the Mad · Apr 29, 2009

I don't think there is any need for more detail. Sometimes all it takes is a minor change, like leaving out an unfamiliar object and substituting something that doesn't attract attention.

Mad Queen · Apr 29, 2009

It depends on what details you are not explaining. If it's just unnecessary backstory, then you're fine, but hiding something the POV character knows just to create a hook is annoying. For example: "When Sally saw Bob doing it again, she almost called the police. How dare he to do it in broad daylight?" Then fifteen pages later you reveal that "doing it" is just "mowing the lawn" or something. I want to wonder what's going on when the characters themselves wonder what's going on.

wrinkles · Apr 29, 2009

FOTSGreg said:
Hi, Juiette (waves).

MMcDonald64, The purpose of your first chapter is to hook your readers and get them interested in going on to the next chapter. You need action, not background, in any sense of the word. You cannot devote a single wasted word to telling the reader what a character thinks, what his background is, what he thinks about love or life or politics or whatever.

HOOK your reader first. Fill them in on the background later and gradually as you lay out your world.

I really, really, disagree with that. First page, okay, but first chapter?

Juliette Wade · Apr 29, 2009

Yes, of course you want to hook your reader. But one of the things that can help you do that is showing something mysterious, hinting that there is a backstory, and saving the details of it for a little later. If you have a device, maybe show your protagonist using it, and use his point of view to show the reader how he understands its operation while he's doing it. Then when something goes wrong, the reader will be able to understand his shock much better, because maybe there's something about the device he thought he understood but he really doesn't.

To my mind, the hook of a movie like A New Hope is very different from the hook of a book. On the other hand, I think it does exactly what I like to see a hook do. It begins the main conflict. The main conflict is about the empire versus the rebellion. If a hook begins the main conflict, it doesn't necessarily have to begin with the central protagonist. One of the keys to keeping a reader turning pages is making the stakes clear - i.e. showing what bad stuff will happen if he fails. Without a sense of stakes, it's often harder for readers to align themselves with the main character's goals. The opening of A New Hope sets the stakes by showing who's in charge and what happens when he wins. So when you're setting up a story, hook us by showing us the main issue of the story (the time viewing device) and what the main character wants to achieve with it. Also show us what will happen if he doesn't achieve it, or doesn't achieve it properly. Backstory in the first scene should only be maximally relevant and serve to keep people oriented.

I think you would probably do well (from your description) to get a little further into your protagonist's view of how the machine works (not your view

) when he first uses it. This will give people a clearer sense of his dismay when everything goes wrong, and the stakes will be set up at the same time.

cbenoi1 · Apr 29, 2009

> As a reader, I might get turned off if there was something that seems
> very illogical in the first chapter

You haven't read "L'Ecume des Jours" from Boris Vian (published also under the titles Froth of the Daydream and Foam of the Daze). The hook? The MC is waiting near the kitchen sink for an eel to appear, attracted by a pinapple slice so it can cut its head with a razor. Talk about illogical!!! Yet the novel is a marvel to read.

-cb

Izz · Apr 29, 2009

MMcDonald64 said:
For me, I think of those questions as necessary to keep the reader interested enough to continue reading. I want them to wonder at least somewhat.

You basically have the broad answer right there. There's no set answer for a question like this; it depends on your story, as all questions of this type do.

Questions within a story are necessary to keep people reading. Why read on? Isn't that the question we base everything around?

Often critters will read something and find that something niggles them in the execution. They may not be sure what it is, but it niggles and they want to point something out as the cause, so they'll point out that a particular thing isn't explained or they don't think there's enough details here, or something along those lines. The issue often isn't with the lack of detail or the unanswered question, but the general execution of the opening (which is why openings are so tough). So a rule i apply to myself is that if people are asking for answers to questions that i know need to be left unanswered for now that often means the overall execution isn't working as it should be. So i look for ways to improve that--and often other comments in the crit or other crits will help me see how.

NatJM · Apr 30, 2009

cbenoi1 said:
You haven't read "L'Ecume des Jours" from Boris Vian (published also under the titles Froth of the Daydream and Foam of the Daze). The hook? The MC is waiting near the kitchen sink for an eel to appear, attracted by a pinapple slice so it can cut its head with a razor. Talk about illogical!!! Yet the novel is a marvel to read.
-cb

Funny you should mention that book because I read it when I was a young teenager (my mother had the book so I picked it up from the shelf one day) and I didn't understand it... I wonder what I would make of it now?

MMcDonald64 · Apr 30, 2009

Isaac Espriu said:
You basically have the broad answer right there. There's no set answer for a question like this; it depends on your story, as all questions of this type do.

Questions within a story are necessary to keep people reading. Why read on? Isn't that the question we base everything around?

Often critters will read something and find that something niggles them in the execution. They may not be sure what it is, but it niggles and they want to point something out as the cause, so they'll point out that a particular thing isn't explained or they don't think there's enough details here, or something along those lines. The issue often isn't with the lack of detail or the unanswered question, but the general execution of the opening (which is why openings are so tough). So a rule i apply to myself is that if people are asking for answers to questions that i know need to be left unanswered for now that often means the overall execution isn't working as it should be. So i look for ways to improve that--and often other comments in the crit or other crits will help me see how.

That makes perfect sense. I will go back and see if I can figure out what can make it better as far as execution.

mgkatz · Apr 30, 2009

I have spent SO much time editing my first chapter. It's so crucial... not too much detail, not too much backstory, but enough to suck them in and give them a taste of what's to come. I've taken a lot of my details and shoved them in later, but I still feel like I have too much. It's a constant struggle!!

How much detail in first chapter?

MMcDonald64

DeleyanLee

Writing Anarchist

Gillhoughly

Grumpy writer and editor

cwfgal

On the rocks

caitysdad

dawinsor

Dorothy A. Winsor

GeorgieB

Almost a wannabe writer

miles

agent at The Knight Agency

Juliette Wade

Interprets for aliens

cbenoi1

Stijn Hommes

Know what you write...

MMcDonald64

scribbler1382

Write For You, Edit For The Reader

FOTSGreg

Today is your last day.

MMcDonald64

NatJM

Matera the Mad

Bartender, gimme a Linux Mint

Mad Queen

California Mountain Snake

wrinkles

Juliette Wade

Interprets for aliens

cbenoi1

Izz

Doing the Space Operatic

NatJM

MMcDonald64

mgkatz