When's the last time you wrote a Limerick?

Eponaleah · Mar 30, 2009

Here's my attempt:

The witch doctor promised a guarantee
He said he’d curse anything that I see
I take cash or debit,
But no cards of credit
I just cursed Visa and AIG

Now you have a go!

Eponaleah · Mar 31, 2009

Oh, come on... Nobody wants to play?

Mr. Anonymous · Mar 31, 2009

Never written one before.

A great water fall stands before me.
And all I can think of is how much I want to pee.
But there's no bathroom near
I'm about to burst - oh dear!
That's what I get for drinking so much tea.

Eponaleah · Mar 31, 2009

Thanks for playing Mr. Anon. I had never written one before either, but it's fun to try.

Feiss · Mar 31, 2009

This should probably be moved out of Poetry crit, and into the main "writing poetry" forum.

dclary · Mar 31, 2009

I don't rightly recall the last time
I tried making so lightly of rhyme
Of course I admit
My rhyming is shit
But in free-verse I am quite sublime.

Dichroic · Mar 31, 2009

This limerick is in the wrong forum,
Which is why most have ignored'em.
Poet games go up top
Where folks see them and pop
In to try it; up there you'll get quorum.

Feiss · Mar 31, 2009

Dichroic said:
This limerick is in the wrong forum,
Which is why most have ignored'em.
Poet games go up top
Where folks see them and pop
In to try it; up there you'll get quorum.

why is it that I
must always use the wrong form
in these games we play?

Eponaleah · Mar 31, 2009

Dichroic said:
This limerick is in the wrong forum,
Which is why most have ignored'em.
Poet games go up top
Where folks see them and pop
In to try it; up there you'll get quorum.

Thank you for pointing this out
I've made a mistake there's no doubt
I'll take better care
Won't just post anywhere
Though I still get lost when I wander about

A. Hamilton · Mar 31, 2009

there once was a newbie with verse
who jumped in recruitment at first
the replies were so kind
that she started to find
her time here would soon be immersed

poetinahat · Apr 1, 2009

The limerick thread has been moved
And responses will soon be improved
So Eponaleah
need no longer feah.
Our feathers, once ruffled, are smooved.

dgrintalis · Apr 1, 2009

There once was a girl named Bella
who fell in love with a sparkly fella
there was a big fight
'cause he watched her at night
and this is all I can tell ya.

Duke · Apr 1, 2009

Cereal Tiller

There once was a gal from Nantucket
Whose corn crop took farmers to shuck it.
Grain gathered by the men
Was stored in a big bin
For loaders and shippers to truck it.

Dichroic · Apr 1, 2009

A really fun thing to do is to tell any five-year-old a limerick beginning with "There once was a man from Nantucket" (there are lots of clean versions) just to watch their parents' faces as you recite the first line.

Duke · Apr 1, 2009

Dichroic said:
A really fun thing to do is to tell any five-year-old a limerick beginning with "There once was a man from Nantucket" (there are lots of clean versions) just to watch their parents' faces as you recite the first line.

That would be funny -- but not me! I can get into enough trouble without trying. Those clean Nantucket limericks are probably rare, since perhaps only a sparse few words sound like 'bucket.' And I'm never good at working them into regular conversation.

Duke · Apr 1, 2009

Chillin' Out

One warm-hearted gal in Nebraska
Succeeded attempting to mask a
Slight wince when she told
How winters were cold
But hardly severe as Alaska.

KaysenParkerPlath · Apr 3, 2009

I went to the ma-tournament today,
One knocker-up took my breath away,
She bent and contorted,
consequently aborted,
She said she was leavin' anyway.

Rivana · Apr 4, 2009

There once was fella named Tober,
who never could stay clean and sober.
He went to the park,
a smoke made a spark
and that bit is all that they told her.

Lady Cat · Apr 4, 2009

Oh no, please not this again!
The weather is really insane
It’s April you know
So it surely can’t snow
It must be some kind of white rain!

Duke · Apr 10, 2009

The Wart Report

Encountering another fat toad,
One signaled their fraternity code.
They lunched on fresh bugs,
Shared gossip, gave hugs,
Then continued their hops down the road.

donroc · Apr 10, 2009

My favorite is the Farta from Sparta.

This is my homage to Twain's 1601.

Lord Essex passed sulphuric gloom
In Elizabeth's crowded room.
"Was it you, my young page?"
"Nay, my bowels are underage.
'Twas the man who would be your groom."

sarrahhakim · Nov 26, 2012

Is it possible to revive this thread?
I really don't want for it to be dead
Limericks are fun
I love them a ton
I want the limerick love to be spread.

onestepp · Nov 27, 2012

I want the limerick love to spread
My pen went in motion and sped
Moved up, and down page
Like it was uncaged
So many more limericks overhead.

When's the last time you wrote a Limerick?

Check out my Photoblography!

Check out my Photoblography!

Just a guy with a pen & a delusion

Check out my Photoblography!

Sleeps during the day

Unabashed Mercenary

that's di-CROW-ick

Sleeps during the day

Check out my Photoblography!

here for a minute...catch me?

Numbers are beautiful

'Tis true, she is a monstergirl

Versifier nolo contendere

that's di-CROW-ick

Versifier nolo contendere

Versifier nolo contendere

Walks in the shades.

Versifier nolo contendere

Historicals and Horror rule

sucking out all the marrow of life