POV and death - would this be jarring?

Would be grateful for anyone's opinion on a scene that I'm struggling with.

Scene Setting: two characters holed up in temporary safety, looking out at terrain filled with monsters. One is the MC. The other is a minor character, an ally who is introduced and killed in this early chapter.

Scene Summary: They argue about whether they can make it through the dangerous terrain. MC says they should stick where they are and wait for help. Ally says he has a wife and kids and must get to them. MC decides to stick, while Ally makes a run for it. Ally doesn't get far before he is caught and killed.

I wrote this scene from the Point of View of the MC. Her opinion is that her ally isn't thinking straight due to his desperation to reach his family. But of course she's guessing at his inner turmoil, which diminishes the emotional impact.

So I'm thinking what if I write the scene from the POV of the minor character, tormented by thoughts of what his family might be suffering. Finally he makes a bolt for it, leaving the MC behind. Then I'd switch POV and the next scene is the MC watching him nearly make it but get taken down.

But I'm wondering if that would be very jarring to read? It's an early chapter, 4-5 paragraphs from POV of a minor character, then switch POV, bang, he's dead.

I'm doing Nano so I won't try writing the alternative version until next month. Just looking for anyone's thoughts about POV and death, especially when it's a minor character whose function is primarily to illustrate how dangerous the situation is for the MC.

Thanks, Barking Tree and Maryn. Two somewhat different opinions, but at least that makes me feel not so bad about being unsure!

Thanks, Rhoda and Nekko. Food for thought. Thinking on my own reading, I guess it's not uncommon in thrillers/mysteries for an early POV from the main victim - but then although they're dead, they're a main focus for the rest of the novel.

My case is different, a guy who appears and disappears like a jack-in-the-box, I think I'd find that a bit annoying myself.

Rhoda, I'll check out Little. I'd heard he might be a bit hard-core for my tastes, but I do need to be aware of the big names.

Nekko, I'll check out your SYW this evening.

phineas12gauge said:

I think it would work & third person limited allows for it.

The way I would approach it would be to split the chapter into two scenes:

* first scene and opening from disposable characters point of view up until she is attacked/fails.

then cut to

* Second scene, have the main character observe what happens and continue from there.

EDIT: Oh, and I just wanted to add. I do agree that if its a minor character it might not be worth the effort for the effect.

So think deeply about what this character represents to the story.

Is this the first demonstration of what monsters can do? Does the main character also have people he needs to rescue? would this act as a warning to him? Are they just a redshirt added for body count?

Click to expand...

To answer the questions at the end of this interesting post:
Yes, its' the first demo to the MC of what monsters can do.
Yes, MC has people she needs to rescue.
Yes, it's a warning.
So with those answers, I'm not sure if that makes the victim just a redshirt. His meeting with the MC is the inciting incident.

I said earlier in the thread that I'm relieved there a different views, so I'm not just missing the obvious by being unsure. When I come to another pass through, I'm going to write a second version which will probably follow the structure laid out by Phineas as that makes total sense to me. Then maybe get other eyes to look at both versions.

Thanks all, for the views.