Thanks y'all. If it's of any interest, I deleted the pages having to do with "they who shall remain nameless (twsrn)" and as soon as I can figure out how to do it, I am deleting the vids I made about them from Youtube.
And I made a decision last night re my first two books, the ones with Xlibris Publishing. I have had nothing but lies and put offs from them ever since I hooked up with them. They are trying to convince me that despite one million five hundred thousand email ads being sent out...despite the fact that the books are listed world wide and have been for a year...despite the fact that they are listed through places like b and a, b and n, and others...and despite the fact that they are listed on their very own website...that i have only sold three of one of the books and none of the other in an entire year?! Well, I have had it. It cost me altogether over a thousand dollars that I quite literally nearly starved to send them and they want to treat me as if I am too stupid to see through their lies. So, last night, I made a decision. Monday I am calling them, and sending them an email, informing them that I want both books canceled, removed from their data base, and that I feel they owe me at least half of what it cost me to have them publish the books. After all, why pay them for something they haven't done? They did not design the covers, I did. They did not do the editing, proofreading, and correcting, i did, more times than I want to think about. All they did was enter the data onto a computer, save it to a file and push a button to start printing it. And then of course, least I forget, they had their trained monkeys throw the pages together and bind them. Don't you all wish you got paid over a thousand dollars to push a few buttons! So Monday I am notifying them that the games are over. I want the books removed from their data base, I want the contract canceled, and I want at least a portion of what I have paid in the year those books have been out for the pleasure of having them lie to me and play head games with me. The other book, the last one, they have precisely till my birthday in March to prove themselves or I will be doing the same with them. I am sick and tired of being the world's blasted doormat.
And this is to all of you who advise getting an agent. That advise is very wise, except for one teensy weensy thing...agents want the one thing I do not possess...five letters...m..o..n..e..y. Up front....in cash...before they will help. And then if you are unfortunate to get one that has masochistic tendencies and likes torturing those paying them, they take your money and never help you...sort of like publish america and xlibris and author house. I do so hope you will forgive my lack of faith in people these days, it has taken somewhat of a beating lately.
To the one that mentioned the "crit" thing, and said i can share my work with others...what is it, where is it, what does one need to qualify to share their work, and what guarantee's does one have that they work is safe? I am taking a leap of faith nearly as large as I did when I knowingly sacrificed nearly everything I absolutely did not need to get the books published in the first place by pulling the first two and then I am going to try to rewrite them. There is only one little bitty problem with that scenario though. You see, I do not write like you all do, sitting down and thinking and plotting and figuring out characters and all of that. I write by inspiration. I do not interact with the world around me, therefor I have little to draw on for inspiration. When I say I write by inspiration, I mean exactly that. A chance word, a memory, even a wisp of scent or a flash of color will start the words cascading into my head, and they will not let me go till I let them go. This it is with the stories, Thus it is with the verses. I only have a seventh grade education, failed every English class I was ever in, and have little or no knowledge, as I stated, of the world around me. You see, I suffer agoraphobia. I do not interact well with either the world or the inhabitants within it. I do not see things as they do and often am lost and confused by the motives behind what drives them. I do not understand them and they have never sought to understand me. I question things, I think about and wonder about things, things that the few times that I tried to share with others, they either mocked me or threatened to lock me away. I am not crazy, I just don't see life the way they do. My writing reflects this. Tell me more of those "crit" group things and I will take that leap of faith and share some of the things I have written since the books. Mayhaps if they accept my small works I will gain courage to share the ones that I hold closer to my heart. And this in answer to the one who inquired if I write "fantasy"...this I am not sure of, I truly do not know what you would call what I write. I simply call them "heart speak" for that is from whence they originate. I cannot write through consciously willing the words into being, planning them, plotting them. The words simply come of their own accord. And I set them free. If there is indeed a place for me to share, then I would seek to share the very story that Publish America rejected. I would seek to share just that one, which was my very first non poetical writing, with any who could view it and judge honestly and fairly and be at least somewhat gentle in their critiquing.
Query...how and where do I find an agent? What would I say to one? Would I show them my work? What all do they do? If any of you have more advice or tips, and would be able to better convey them in a less formalized format, you are welcome to email me at [email protected]. I would welcome all the help I can get. I have talent, at least a little I have been told, but a seed that remains in the packet cannot grow. I just need help growing.
And this to the one that made the comment about the cost of the computer, I say you nay, there is no alternative to the route I currently travel. I have no other recourse save the one I currently am following. I live in a small town. I do not drive. It costs me anywhere from ten to twenty dollars to have someone take me to the closest large town. I have to have the computer now, so I do not have the luxury of saving the money to get one outright. So thus am I stuck in a no win situation. I am very nearly a total recluse, this computer is vital not only in the instance of being able to write, but it is my link to the world. And the only way I could get and keep this computer is to rent it. From the only computer rental place in town. It will be paid off in about fifteen months. If i keep my sanity that long.
so, leave me your thoughts, and please, explain about those "crit" things.
I will be checking in periodically to see what you all have to say. I am at my ropes end and the knot is slipping. And their is a pit of piranha's below me.
d'racae'lyn/aka/author amber michelle.
And I made a decision last night re my first two books, the ones with Xlibris Publishing. I have had nothing but lies and put offs from them ever since I hooked up with them. They are trying to convince me that despite one million five hundred thousand email ads being sent out...despite the fact that the books are listed world wide and have been for a year...despite the fact that they are listed through places like b and a, b and n, and others...and despite the fact that they are listed on their very own website...that i have only sold three of one of the books and none of the other in an entire year?! Well, I have had it. It cost me altogether over a thousand dollars that I quite literally nearly starved to send them and they want to treat me as if I am too stupid to see through their lies. So, last night, I made a decision. Monday I am calling them, and sending them an email, informing them that I want both books canceled, removed from their data base, and that I feel they owe me at least half of what it cost me to have them publish the books. After all, why pay them for something they haven't done? They did not design the covers, I did. They did not do the editing, proofreading, and correcting, i did, more times than I want to think about. All they did was enter the data onto a computer, save it to a file and push a button to start printing it. And then of course, least I forget, they had their trained monkeys throw the pages together and bind them. Don't you all wish you got paid over a thousand dollars to push a few buttons! So Monday I am notifying them that the games are over. I want the books removed from their data base, I want the contract canceled, and I want at least a portion of what I have paid in the year those books have been out for the pleasure of having them lie to me and play head games with me. The other book, the last one, they have precisely till my birthday in March to prove themselves or I will be doing the same with them. I am sick and tired of being the world's blasted doormat.
And this is to all of you who advise getting an agent. That advise is very wise, except for one teensy weensy thing...agents want the one thing I do not possess...five letters...m..o..n..e..y. Up front....in cash...before they will help. And then if you are unfortunate to get one that has masochistic tendencies and likes torturing those paying them, they take your money and never help you...sort of like publish america and xlibris and author house. I do so hope you will forgive my lack of faith in people these days, it has taken somewhat of a beating lately.
To the one that mentioned the "crit" thing, and said i can share my work with others...what is it, where is it, what does one need to qualify to share their work, and what guarantee's does one have that they work is safe? I am taking a leap of faith nearly as large as I did when I knowingly sacrificed nearly everything I absolutely did not need to get the books published in the first place by pulling the first two and then I am going to try to rewrite them. There is only one little bitty problem with that scenario though. You see, I do not write like you all do, sitting down and thinking and plotting and figuring out characters and all of that. I write by inspiration. I do not interact with the world around me, therefor I have little to draw on for inspiration. When I say I write by inspiration, I mean exactly that. A chance word, a memory, even a wisp of scent or a flash of color will start the words cascading into my head, and they will not let me go till I let them go. This it is with the stories, Thus it is with the verses. I only have a seventh grade education, failed every English class I was ever in, and have little or no knowledge, as I stated, of the world around me. You see, I suffer agoraphobia. I do not interact well with either the world or the inhabitants within it. I do not see things as they do and often am lost and confused by the motives behind what drives them. I do not understand them and they have never sought to understand me. I question things, I think about and wonder about things, things that the few times that I tried to share with others, they either mocked me or threatened to lock me away. I am not crazy, I just don't see life the way they do. My writing reflects this. Tell me more of those "crit" group things and I will take that leap of faith and share some of the things I have written since the books. Mayhaps if they accept my small works I will gain courage to share the ones that I hold closer to my heart. And this in answer to the one who inquired if I write "fantasy"...this I am not sure of, I truly do not know what you would call what I write. I simply call them "heart speak" for that is from whence they originate. I cannot write through consciously willing the words into being, planning them, plotting them. The words simply come of their own accord. And I set them free. If there is indeed a place for me to share, then I would seek to share the very story that Publish America rejected. I would seek to share just that one, which was my very first non poetical writing, with any who could view it and judge honestly and fairly and be at least somewhat gentle in their critiquing.
Query...how and where do I find an agent? What would I say to one? Would I show them my work? What all do they do? If any of you have more advice or tips, and would be able to better convey them in a less formalized format, you are welcome to email me at [email protected]. I would welcome all the help I can get. I have talent, at least a little I have been told, but a seed that remains in the packet cannot grow. I just need help growing.
And this to the one that made the comment about the cost of the computer, I say you nay, there is no alternative to the route I currently travel. I have no other recourse save the one I currently am following. I live in a small town. I do not drive. It costs me anywhere from ten to twenty dollars to have someone take me to the closest large town. I have to have the computer now, so I do not have the luxury of saving the money to get one outright. So thus am I stuck in a no win situation. I am very nearly a total recluse, this computer is vital not only in the instance of being able to write, but it is my link to the world. And the only way I could get and keep this computer is to rent it. From the only computer rental place in town. It will be paid off in about fifteen months. If i keep my sanity that long.
so, leave me your thoughts, and please, explain about those "crit" things.
I will be checking in periodically to see what you all have to say. I am at my ropes end and the knot is slipping. And their is a pit of piranha's below me.
d'racae'lyn/aka/author amber michelle.
and 
for all the support and advice you have so effortless supplied. And of course penning the cult classic A. Nights.
(System Admin in real life...hehe)