you're squeezed in the back seat between some woman who must've used garlic soup to wash down a garlic sandwich, and a man who never phased out of constantly stuffing his face with Krispy Kremes and talking with his mouth full....fortunately,
Fortunately...unfortunately
- Thread starter QueenB
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...Unfortunately, you never learned how to cluck, so you do a sort of turkey gobble instead, they think you're making mean-spirited fun of them and are very angry about it.
Fortunately...
Fortunately...
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... as reincarnated published writers, all our published works consist solely of essays about the positive and uplifting aspects of Hugo Chavez.
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... the hundreds of thousands paid to each of us are in Venezuelan bolivares, which amount to around $1.98, so we are fantastically rich only if we actually live in Venezuela.
Fortunately...
Fortunately...
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we realize that's a bad deal all around, so we pass on the publication thing, take a job at McDonalds and reconsider our life goals. Unfortunately,
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... we become very depressed as we realize that working at McDonalds IS our life goal. Fortunately...
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... just the sight of McD's food makes you throw up which makes it impossible to eat and very difficult to actually work there.
Fortunately...
Fortunately...
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Morgan Spurlock was there scouting out talent for the off-Broadway production of his documentary "Super Size Me" and he offered you an important role.
Unfortunately,
Unfortunately,
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... all that throwing up at the sight of fast food makes you unable to even consider such a role, and you even threw up on Morgan Spurlock.
Fotunately....
Fotunately....
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... when Spurlock pointed at them and commanded you to "beat them off", you misunderstood. Fortunately...
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... all those bad guys you were groping were not so amused, and chased after you... with clubs. Fortunately...
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Fortunately... You easily outrun the overweight assassins, escape completely, and find yourself seated in a Japanese restaurant calmly ordering Fugu Blowfish sushi.
Unfortunately...
Unfortunately...
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...the sushi was cheaper than what you normally pay for a colonic irrigation session. Unfortunately...