New Moon!!!

aquacat · Nov 20, 2009

I went and saw the movie today.

I think everyone is quite wrong about this series. If you just tilt your head slightly, it becomes some of the funniest, most amazing satire ever produced ever.

I was laughing so hard during the movie that all the tweens sitting in my aisle shot me dirty looks through their twicontacts. A rollicking good time.

Zoombie · Nov 20, 2009

I'm just sad there is no hot werewolf/vampire/bella threesomes.

<sighs>

bclement412 · Nov 21, 2009

I saw the movie last night, and it was pretty good except for the fact that Taylor Lautner CANNOT act even if his life depended on it. And the dialogue made no sense at parts, even though I read the books and saw the first movie. And it was so cheesy that it was hilarious, so overall, I thought the movie was pretty good

DavidZahir · Nov 21, 2009

My impression is that while Twilight vampires are very, very hard to kill they can in fact be destroyed by sheer numbers. Another reason would be that vampires tend to be territorial and if "in the open" would be subject to attack by more of their kind. Keep in mind that for most of human history the number of human beings on the entire planet was less than half a billion -- usually a whole lot less. Certainly, in modern times vampires are much more vulnerable. Methinks napalm would work quite convincingly against them.

Having said that, the world of Twilight is fun, but as fictional universes with vampires go, I prefer Buffy or True Blood or Forever Knight or even the Wamphyri.

childeroland · Nov 21, 2009

With the faithfulness to the books, one wonders how the filmmakers will handle the Jacob-imprinting on Renesmee (sp?) storyline.

Exir · Nov 21, 2009

With the faithfulness to the books, one wonders how the filmmakers will handle the Jacob-imprinting on Renesmee (sp?) storyline.

Don't worry, they'll leave that out. Instead they'll flashforward to Renesmee becoming an adult, and then Jacob proposing to her. Problem solved on all counts.

Or they could leave the whole thing in, intact, and we'd have another witty Ebert review to laugh our heads off.

Darzian · Nov 21, 2009

Careful with spoilers everyone.

My sister is trying very hard to drag me to the theater with her. I had explicitly said that I will not go. Her attempts at hypnosis and mind manipulation continue...

maxmordon · Nov 21, 2009

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGd9qAfpZio

Twilight parody with The Joker as Edward Cullen...

Wavy_Blue · Nov 21, 2009

~*Kate*~ · Nov 21, 2009

bclement412 said:
I saw the movie last night, and it was pretty good except for the fact that Taylor Lautner CANNOT act even if his life depended on it. And the dialogue made no sense at parts, even though I read the books and saw the first movie. And it was so cheesy that it was hilarious, so overall, I thought the movie was pretty good

Really? I thought Taylor was good and even KStewart improved, but RPattz was hard to watch. :Shrug:

There were definitely some scenes that were unintentionally hilarious, but I enjoyed it and would venture to say some parts were well done. Oscar worthy? No. Huge improvement over the first? Definitely. Worth seeing if it's your kind of thing? Sure.

katiemac · Nov 22, 2009

Well, you Twilighters are breaking records all over the place: Smashed The Dark Knight's and Harry Potter HBP's midnight showing ($24 mil) and now hold the record for the biggest opening day ever ($73 mil) over Dark Knight ($69 mil).

You're all poised to break the biggest opening weekend, too.

ETA: Well, no biggest weekend opening for New Moon. It landed third, behind Dark Knight and Spider-man 3, with $140 mil.

Sn00py · Nov 22, 2009

Pretty awesome review of New Moon, which I expect to be every bit as terrible as the reviewer claims. I plan for most of our popcorn to go at the screen.

My favorite part of the review:

It's garbage. And while I'm aware there are people who mistake the torpidity of these films for tragic depth, it's my hope that many of them will soon be exposed to Jane Austen as more than a cheap allusion, at which point they'll realize - with horror-struck remorse - the ignorant error of their youth.

LOG · Nov 22, 2009

This dude gets my opinion of the series pretty accurately, be warned, it's around 46 minutes long.

aquacat said:
I think everyone is quite wrong about this series. If you just tilt your head slightly, it becomes some of the funniest, most amazing satire ever produced ever.

I was laughing so hard during the movie that all the tweens sitting in my aisle shot me dirty looks through their twicontacts. A rollicking good time.

Definitely, except she didn't write it to be satirical so she's still a not-very-good writer, and the movies, if possible, are even worse.

Also, the best of Rifftraxes Twlight

Wavy_Blue · Nov 22, 2009

katiemac said:
Well, you Twilighters are breaking records all over the place: Smashed The Dark Knight's and Harry Potter HBP's midnight showing ($24 mil) and now hold the record for the biggest opening day ever ($73 mil) over Dark Knight ($69 mil).

You're all poised to break the biggest opening weekend, too.

ETA: Well, no biggest weekend opening for New Moon. It landed third, behind Dark Knight and Spider-man 3, with $140 mil.

This movie is going to be so unbelievably top-heavy, though. Everyone who wants to go see it has probably already gone, and I'd be willing to bet that ticket sales drop dramatically after Thanksgiving. And I'd bet that families going to see movies on the holiday aren't going to pick New Moon; they're going to pick Fantastic Mr. Fox or A Christmas Carol. Casual moviegoers aren't going to want to see it, either, especially thanks to the absolutely dismal reviews. Once December hits and we see movies like Princess and the Frog, Avatar, and Sherlock Holmes coming out, New Moon is going to take a serious plunge.

New Moon's appeal might be its blessing for an opening weekend, but it's its curse in the long run.

I bet it doesn't even beat Star Trek's domestic gross; to do that, it'd have to gross around $70 million more than Twilight did, and I just don't see that happening. It's appeal is just too limited. Transformers 2 did as well as it did because it appeals to EVERYONE: men, women, children, teenagers. New Moon appeals to women and teenage girls, who are fanatical enough that they all went to see it opening weekend. But that's it. There's nothing else feeding into it besides repeat viewings for the fans, and that didn't help the first movie that much.

Zoombie · Nov 22, 2009

Holy wow, someone else watches The Spoony Experiment!

jodiodi · Nov 22, 2009

Wavy_Blue said:
Transformers 2 did as well as it did because it appeals to EVERYONE: men, women, children, teenagers. New Moon appeals to women and teenage girls, who are fanatical enough that they all went to see it opening weekend.

I'm a woman and Transformers 2 wasn't even on my radar as a possible movie to watch. How was it supposed to appeal to women? It was a teen-boy movie if ever there was one.

New Moon doesn't appeal to me either. Nor does it appeal to my teen step-daughter. She laughed 'til she almost peed when I asked her if she was interested in seeing it. "Noooooo."

scarletpeaches · Nov 22, 2009

jodiodi said:
I'm a woman and Transformers 2 wasn't even on my radar as a possible movie to watch. How was it supposed to appeal to women? It was a teen-boy movie if ever there was one.

New Moon doesn't appeal to me either. Nor does it appeal to my teen step-daughter. She laughed 'til she almost peed when I asked her if she was interested in seeing it. "Noooooo."

I can give you a two-word answer:

Megan Fox.

jodiodi · Nov 22, 2009

scarletpeaches said:
I can give you a two-word answer:

Megan Fox.

Never heard of her. Why would her appearance appeal to women?

Toothpaste · Nov 22, 2009

Megan Fox is meant to appeal to women? Straight women? I love a kick ass main female character, I love a three dimensional female character even more, she was neither of these. And I certainly have no desire to see a film with a female character who's sole purpose is eye candy. For that matter, not interested with male characters in the same position quite frankly.

If Transformers 2 was meant to appeal to women, it was meant to appeal to them the same way any action film does, because there are women who *shock* love action films. Myself included. However, it was a terrible action film and thus I hated it.

New Moon is exactly the same. A romance movie that will appeal to its demographic along with the few exceptions to the rule of men who also enjoy romance movies (I know a few of them actually). However it too is a terrible film, thus you will still find fans of the genre not enjoying it either.

scarletpeaches · Nov 22, 2009

jodiodi said:
Never heard of her. Why would her appearance appeal to women?

It appeals to this one.

I've never seen either Transformers film but I'd be watching her rather than Shia LaBoof (or however you spell it).

Zoombie · Nov 22, 2009

Shia is actually a good actor...if you give him a good script and director. See Holes for proof of that.

charlotte49ers · Nov 22, 2009

Holes is a great movie.

I just don't get why Twilight gets analyzed so much. It's cheap and easy entertainment that doesn't require a lot of thought. Sometimes that kind of thing is a great break.

scarletpeaches · Nov 22, 2009

You don't have to analyse it. It's not exactly deep. The messages it sends are clear. The controversy comes when people either object to those messages (and I am one of them) or others say "It doesn't matter."

On one hand, the message of Twilight disgusts me. On the other hand, it's fiction. I worry that people will take Edward/Bella as a template for a love-relationship when it's nothing to do with love - romantic, yes (full of angst) but by no means loving.

Then again, should mooning teenage girls with no sense of what real love is and their need to be protected from themselves be just cause to stop Meyer writing another book?

cptwentworth · Nov 22, 2009

And thus the joy of the diversity of population. Where would we be if everyone only wanted Rambo films? Or Die Hard? Or Transformers? Or serious, introspective documentaries? There's a smattering of everything for everyone. I liked Twilight. Light-hearted entertainment. Some don't. Go see something else.

charlotte49ers · Nov 22, 2009

I guess I'm in the camp of people who say if you can't discern reality from fiction, you need help anyway. lol

New Moon!!!

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