Need a favor from some kind victims..I mean people

Kitrianna · May 7, 2008

Howdy folks! Now here is the crux of my prob. I have the lovely not so little (try 116,000+ word count) novel that I would like a few people to have a looksie at. While I have a couple of friends and my lovely husband reading it, they (with the exceptions of the hubs) never bother to give me any input besides "It's good." and that's not helping me. Now before y'all say go to SYW, I did. I don't like the idea of people reading it one chapter at a time because I don't have inet at my place currently (LONG story and please don't get me started about what I think of my only option for highspeed in the area where I live!) and sometimes I come into town quite often and other times it maybe over a week until I pop in again. So if anyone wants to be really kind and sweet and take on reading the whole bloody thing (at your leisure of course, but I mean taking the whole novel in one shot), please let me know. I will be indebted to you forever. I'm at the point where I just want some bloody feedback already! You may now return to a normal thread that was already in progress...what is normal btw?

Phaeal · May 7, 2008

I think this belongs in the Beta Readers thread.

DarkDesireX · May 7, 2008

Consideration.

What is the story about? I'll take a look but if it's not something that interests me I'm afraid I wouldn't be much help what with the ADHD...haha.

Kitrianna · May 7, 2008

Ok really quick outline...need Tim Horton's!

It's fantasy fiction about a young girl who leaves her home the day afetr her 16th birthday for what reason, she hasn't the foggiest, but she knows that her presence is endangering her entire village. Along the way she meets a handsome arch mage who helps her harness her abilities, inherits a mage clan from her late mother's elder brother, meets a werewolf who turns out to be her biological father, a werecat, battles a demon, saves another werewolf who is her distant cousin, finds out whe has HUGE family among these immortal creatures that her mom never knew about, battles a twisted mage/werewolf, falls in love, gives in to being in love, and saves a good hearted vampire.

Not a proper synopsis I know, but I am currently both sleep deprived and caffiene deprived...NOT a good combo.

Kitrianna · May 7, 2008

Note to all who may respond in the next few days:

It won't be until next week at the earliest that I will be able to respond to you. The hubs has decreed that since I am getting progressively worse at a rather rapid rate (somebody gave me a lovely spring virus, I believe) that I am to be grounded to the house for the next few days (yes, I know he sucks and I agree with that statement). Gotta love men who ground you cause you're sick and lost your voice in the span of a 30 second convo eh? So I apologize for any inconvenience that this may cause anyone (or I can just give you the number of my future inet provider and you can call and vent on the owner for me).

ishtar'sgate · May 7, 2008

Sorry, can't help you but I'm a slave to Timmie's too.

Linnea

Kitrianna · May 7, 2008

Always nice to find another Timmie's addict.

Matera the Mad · May 7, 2008

Since the genre is in my comfort zone and the plot sounds fun, I will stick my neck out. I tend to be damnably honest, but I can be gentle, and at the very least I try to be helpful. If I find that I can't get to the end of it, I will tell you exactly why in painful detail. Deal?

You can find some of my highly variable comments in SYW, if you need references.

Diana W. · May 7, 2008

I love Timmies too. As does my wife.
This story sounds like my kind of thing so I'll give it a go and give you as honest an assessment as I can

Kitrianna · May 9, 2008

I appreciate the offers guys. Let me know where to send the torture material and it'll be off and as far as brutal honesty goes, it's exactly what I'm looking for (I'm a glutton for punishment, that's why the hubs is still around

). And yes, I know on Wednesday that I said that I wouldn't be around for a few days (til next week at the earliest), but I managed to convince the warden (aka the hubs) for to let me come in today and it actually worked! So I'll be floating around til around 2 PM eastern, then I have to buy food. No starving artists around here.

writin52 · May 9, 2008

Sorry, can only claim to being addicted to coffee. No offense Timmie worshippers, but I do not like Timmie's regular coffee, decaf yes, steeped tea, a definite yah, but not the regular coffee in any way shape or form. Sorry, thats how I feel. The novel sounds interesting, but not my genre I'm afraid, so will let others who are most comfortable review it.

Bartholomew · May 11, 2008

I have a slot for a beta read over the summer. PM me.

Kitrianna · May 13, 2008

Someone please just shoot me

Ok, trying to read threads, even my own, when I can't get my eyes to focus properly and I'm doped up on decongestants and advil (neither of which is really working) is not fun, so I ask this favor of anyone who reads this thread and is interested in helping a girl (namely me) out. PM me before thursday afternoon (I should be feeling better by then and that is the next time that I will be online) with your contact info or what have you. I'm thinking that for now 2 more people would be good (don't want to send out my baby to everyone :tongue

). Anyways, y'all enjoy yourselves and I'm going back into my little corner where I can suffer from my lovely sinus infection in peace (or is that pieces?).

Matera the Mad · May 14, 2008

Don't eat any dairy products or meat (anything that comes from any animal, even worms lol) for a week, you will clear up faster. Trust me, been there. Seriously been there. Fried head and all.

Um...the good news is I've made it through chapter six.....

Kitrianna · May 15, 2008

I'm back and feeling better. I appreciate the advice Matera, but this was a bit more than my homeopathic remedies could fix (I have been avoiding dairy for weeks and I only eat meat once a day...it's an agreement I have the hubs, me being diabetic and all I have to have some). A trip to the doctor's and some antibiotics and I'm doing much better (I've laid off the advil). A nice bill for the insurance company should put a smile on everyone's faces...it did mine. I'll be back in about half an hour or so...the hubs is expecting me for break. Ciao.

Kitrianna · May 15, 2008

Again I run away...need Timmies! Be back after lunch!

Kitrianna · May 15, 2008

Ok guys...my last visit for the week and I won't be back until at least Tuesday (it's a holiday here on Monday), so if you don't get ahold of me tonight...then you're just gonna have to wait. Now on to more serious notes and this is nothing personal ladies, I'm all for women reading fantasy fiction, but I definitely need some male critiquing on this as well, so...If you ain't a guy and you don't already have a copy and want one, it ain't happening for awhile. Sorry girls.

Matera the Mad · May 20, 2008

Don't bother.

Kitrianna · May 22, 2008

Hey guys, I do have one more favor to ask. Even if it kills you...read the ENTIRE MS or I will disregard any comments that you make concerning the story line. Grammar I will take into consideration however. Sorry, I have already had one person who didn't completely read it and I have disregarded her comments on the creative aspects. I only expect that which I would give you (if you asked me to beta

). So read it all, then have a ball laying into me about the probs. And for the person who already screwed up with that...don't bother trying to go back and read it in full, you've already lost my respect. BTW, would someone pay the damn heat bill??! I'm wearing a winter coat in late spring...something is definitely wrong with this picture!

Bartholomew · May 25, 2008

Kitrianna said:
...don't bother trying to go back and read it in full, you've already lost my respect. BTW, would someone pay the damn heat bill??! I'm wearing a winter coat in late spring...something is definitely wrong with this picture!

Be aware that sometimes the most powerful statement a reader can make about a book is to stop reading it.

Kitrianna · May 27, 2008

No not stop reading it...skim. If you can't hack reading it in it's entirity as it was meant to be read, let me know and I will fogive you, I'm not a complete meanie (don't ask the hubs...he'll lie and say that I am). Mind y'all it may be a mute point ATM cause I've already started a major rewrite...oops.

Beyondian · May 27, 2008

Even skimming can be a very strong message to an author. I'd be careful disregarding a person's opinion merely because they didn't finish the book. At the very least they're telling you that the book didn't hold their interest.

BrynnaC · Jun 12, 2008

Hope you don't mean me, Kitrianna. I have not given up on it. Everybody has been sick and I've been swamped at work. About half way through, if you're still interested in my opinion.

Kitrianna · Jun 13, 2008

Didn't think you had love. I understand that people acan be rather busy and life has a tendency to toss us all curves. If you want, you can email what you got back to me at the address that I sent you the MS from. If you don't have that addy anymore, then private message me here. Hope everyone is feeling better soon.

Kitrianna · Jun 28, 2008

Ok, an update for all of those who have tried to drag themselves through the second draft. Major rewrite still in progress. Plot hasn't changed, but the first 5 chapters have gone through a total overhaul. What was supposed to be a quick correction of a few problem chapters has turned into throwing out what is already written and reworking the entire plot into something that I hope is MUCH better. If you want it, I got it and i'll be floating around, so you know what to do.

Need a favor from some kind victims..I mean people

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