The New Lori Jareo

Richard White · Apr 7, 2008

Some of you may remember Lori Jareo, the "intrepid journalist" who decided there needed to be a bridge to explain the differences between the "real" first three Star Wars movies and the later-day trilogy that invalidated great swaths of it.

Yes, she published her fan-fic "Star Wars: Another Hope" through Lulu and sold it on Amazon.

At least until a certain Imperial Emperor George the First unleashed his elite team of Sith Lawyers on her.

It was not pretty.

Enter the new padawan or to be more accurate, the newest red shirt - Austin P. Torney

Star Trek: The Death Wave

Oh, and it even has the "search inside" function available.

Read it if you dare, but don't blame me for the nightmares you'll have afterwards. Several Trek editors have already attempted to read through this . . . none has survived past page eight.

Oh, and the publisher? It's CreateSpace. Yep, Amazon's own self-publishing arm.

I can hear the lawyers at CBS/Paramount and Pocket Books charging phasers to maximum on this one.

Polenth · Apr 7, 2008

I read it. That's probably enough said.

I wonder how quickly they'll remove it?

Adam Israel · Apr 7, 2008

I love the irony of the excerpt saying "copyright material".

JoNightshade · Apr 7, 2008

I am going to be nice and say I think the author has, in fact, managed to capture the spirit of the original series quite accurately.

::Jo ducks for cover as trekkies pelt her with foreign objects::

drachin8 · Apr 8, 2008

We should institute a new class in public schooling--Thinking Before Acting. The entire semester would be the students thinking about a single action by researching every minute detail, pro, con, etc. Then on the last day, they would act or choose not to act, depending on their research.

Maybe that would save us from this lack of careful forethought.

Probably not, though...

-Michelle

jchines · Apr 8, 2008

Interesting. Looks like he's also been selling it as a part of his "collection" on Lulu.

Sheryl Nantus · Apr 8, 2008

I'm sorry... I can't even make it past the cover!

ChaosTitan · Apr 8, 2008

Fans can be so amusing.

Storm Dream · Apr 8, 2008

Why are people so...dumb?

I mean, damn.

Marian Perera · Apr 8, 2008

Sheryl Nantus said:
I'm sorry... I can't even make it past the cover!

I tried reading the first few pages, which laid some stress on Kirk's potency even at an advanced age and his romantic relationship with Ms. Rand (Ayn? Oh, Janice. Thank you for sparing me). The narrative constantly referred to her as Ms. Rand, and so did Kirk, which reminded me of Scarlett's mother calling her husband "Mr. O'Hara". It was cute and quaint in an utterly bizarre way.

kullervo · Apr 8, 2008

I searched inside. I blame no one; only myself. And now I am going to rinse my eyes.

mscelina · Apr 8, 2008

Quick! Someone pass the bleach!

And remind me...were holodecks standard issues in the original series? because I do not recollect anything other than a pleased feeling with they were introduced in TNG.

sunna · Apr 8, 2008

I clawed my way to page five, where I was frozen in place and time by the thought of people staring deeply into one another's reflections while they kiss. Perhaps it was somehow made possible by the miracles of science mentioned in the next sentence, but I couldn't bring myself to read farther and find out.

The style reminds me strangely of Shatner's acting. (I say this with all love, being a trekkie myself)

ChaosTitan · Apr 8, 2008

mscelina said:
Quick! Someone pass the bleach!

And remind me...were holodecks standard issues in the original series? because I do not recollect anything other than a pleased feeling with they were introduced in TNG.

Holodecks weren't around on Starfleet ships until TNG, as I recall. On "Enteprise," they ran into a few races who used hologram technology (the episode where Trip was 'impregnated' comes immediately to mind), but didn't adapt it themselves.

Yeah, I'm a Trekkie, too.

Sonneillon · Apr 8, 2008

According to Memory Alpha, the federation acquired the holodeck technology from the Xyrillians in 2151. Recreation rooms in the 23rd century aboard Constitution class starships did utilize holographic technology, but not to the degree that the federation would develop later. Holodecks began to be installed upon vessels in 2364. By the 2370's, all decks of Prometheus-class ships were equipped with holo-emitters to allow the free movement of the EMH (Emergency Medical Hologram) around the ship. The Ferengi expanded on the technology to create the more space-efficient holosuite, made for one person at a time.

*is a rabid trekkie*

Matera the Mad · Apr 8, 2008

Shakes head sadly. This is probably the tip of a big, sorry iceberg--tere may be more of it going on than we know. I have encountered one borderline case, not pure fancic but using a lot of ideas/terms, and not at all ashamed of it. Never mind what author could get ticked off (No, not JKR). She might not, it's so badly written :roll:

But anyhowl, it's another CreateSpace.

Smiling Ted · Apr 8, 2008

drachin8 said:
We should institute a new class in public schooling--Thinking Before Acting. The entire semester would be the students thinking about a single action by researching every minute detail, pro, con, etc. Then on the last day, they would act or choose not to act, depending on their research.

Maybe that would save us from this lack of careful forethought.

Probably not, though...

-Michelle

"Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain."

Richard White · Apr 26, 2008

Update:

The book is no longer "available" on Amazon.

Not sure what the final outcome will be. I suspect S&S's gorillas in pinstriped suits are a little more subtle than George L's, but just as effective.

Shweta · Apr 26, 2008

I remember someone was putting some Start Trek fanfic through my local crit group. It did not endear me to star trek.

John M Ford novels, now, they might yet.

The New Lori Jareo

Richard White

Stealthy Plot Bunny Peddler

Polenth

Mushroom

Adam Israel

Formerly known as StoneTable

JoNightshade

has finally arrived

drachin8

post-apocalyptic bunny

jchines

Got the hang of it, here

Sheryl Nantus

Holding out for a Superhero...

ChaosTitan

Around

Storm Dream

Into the blue memory

Marian Perera

starting over

kullervo

minion

mscelina

Teh doommobile, drivin' rite by you

sunna

ChaosTitan

Around

Sonneillon

Autophobic Misanthrope

Matera the Mad

Bartender, gimme a Linux Mint

Smiling Ted

Ah-HA!

Richard White

Stealthy Plot Bunny Peddler

Shweta

gone