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Stew21
03-26-2008, 08:39 PM
I searched for just the words Monty Python, and 305 threads appeared. This does not even indicate the number of threads where MP was only quoted.
One of the best derailers, strongest troll-repelents and best laugh-starters on Absolute Write, Monty Python quotes have eased tensions, created tensions, helped a flounce-thread or two along, and built community with something so many of us know and appreciate: "and now for something completely different".

We did have one thread dedicated to getting it out of our systems.

It didn't work.

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=35906&highlight=Monty+Python

Ken
03-26-2008, 10:07 PM
Ahh, so you're an archivist of sorts. Really cool.
Will be sure to have a question or two for you down the road,
=============================x==================== ==========
about where the x is, if I'm not mistaken.

williemeikle
03-26-2008, 10:34 PM
Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed;
A lovely little thinker but a bugger when he's pissed!

mscelina
03-26-2008, 10:37 PM
And now for something completely different...

...a man with three buttocks.

SupplyDragon
03-26-2008, 11:05 PM
One of my favs from The Search for the Holy Grail

What is your name?

I am Arthur, King of the Britins.

What is your quest?

To find the Holy Grail

What is the air speed velocity of a laden swallow?

How do you mean? An African or European swallow?

Well I don't know that.

AAAAAHHHH.

How do you know so much about swallows?

Well, you have to know these things when you are king.

mscelina
03-26-2008, 11:12 PM
When we play MP&THG, we sit around the TV and literally recite the movie word for word. I can break into the dialogue at any given moment, which has caused much horror and embarassment for my children.

Sir Robin ran away.
He bravely ran away away--
When danger rears its ugly head
Sir Robin turned his tail and fled--

...and there was much rejoicing.


yay.

sheadakota
03-26-2008, 11:16 PM
I fart in your general direction

your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries

Stew21
03-26-2008, 11:18 PM
Oh but if I went 'round sayin' I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away.

Ol' Fashioned Girl
03-26-2008, 11:23 PM
ARTHUR: Be quiet! I order you to be quiet!

WOMAN: Order, eh -- who does he think he is?

ARTHUR: I am your king!

WOMAN: Well, I didn't vote for you.

ARTHUR: You don't vote for kings.

WOMAN: Well, 'ow did you become king then?

ARTHUR: The Lady of the Lake, angels sing her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom ofthe water signifying by Divine Providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. singing stops That is why I am your king!

DENNIS: Listen -- strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.

ARTHUR: Be quiet!

DENNIS: Well you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!

Ol' Fashioned Girl
03-26-2008, 11:23 PM
And here we go again... :)

Stew21
03-26-2008, 11:24 PM
See? :) It is one of the great phenomena of Absolute Write. We just can't help ourselves.

mscelina
03-26-2008, 11:34 PM
but she's got...huge tracts of land--

williemeikle
03-26-2008, 11:44 PM
Chief Constable Er, now then sir, you are Attila the Hun.

Attila the Hun That's right, yes. A. T. Hun. My parents were Mr and Mrs Norman Hun, but they had a little joke when I was born.

Chief Constable Yes well, Mr Hun ...

Attila Oh! Call me 'The', for heaven's sake!

Chief Constable Oh well, The... what do you want to see us about?

Attila I've come to give myself up.

Chief Constable What for?

Attila Looting, pillaging and sacking a major city.

Chief Constable I beg your pardon?

Attila Looting, pillaging, sacking a major city, and I'd like nine thousand other charges to be taken into consideration, please.

sheadakota
03-27-2008, 12:36 AM
every sperm is scared

every sperm is great

if a sperm is wasted

God gets quite irrate.

Let the heathens spill them,

on the dusty ground.

God will make them pay for each sperm that can't be found.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0kJHQpvgB8

ChunkyC
03-27-2008, 12:45 AM
Call the Church Police!

(sounds of sirens & running feet)

What's all this then, Amen?

sheadakota
03-27-2008, 12:49 AM
and then there's this;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGRPFUYUUdQ

sheadakota
03-27-2008, 01:02 AM
Author-But your arms off

Black knight- no it's not

Author- then what's that then?

Black knight-I've had worse.

Author- No you haven't

Black knight- come on you pansy

Author- look you stupid bastard, you've got no arms!

Black knight-it's just a flesh wound.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGRPFUYUUdQ

Mr Flibble
03-27-2008, 01:34 AM
Help! Help! I'm being repressed!

I one more time-a unclog my nose in your direction, son of a window-dresser! I wave my private parts at your aunties, you heaving lot of second-hand electric donkey bottom biters. I burst my pimples at you and call your mother an unrequested silly thing. You tiny-brained wiper of other people's bottoms! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!



Ahhh I feel better for that.

Stew21
03-27-2008, 01:36 AM
Of course you feel better for it. Quoting Monty Python soothes a writer's soul. :)

Mr Flibble
03-27-2008, 01:39 AM
I had a very sad day once, playing an online game. The party were having a bit of fun quoting whole films verbatum( as you do), then some poor, poor, poooor person pipes up 'Who's Monty Python?'

We had to kick him from the group -- obviously he did not derserve to live.

mscelina
03-27-2008, 01:41 AM
Actually, my favorite part of MP&THG are the credits. Damn those llamas anyway.

Stew21
03-27-2008, 01:42 AM
A lady I work with was sick and her children asked her what she needed, could they get her anything. She asked for a wafer-thin mint and a barf bucket. They had no idea what she was talking about and made fun of her for it when she tried to explain.
A few years later one of her kids called her (away at college) and had seen Monty Python movies with friends. "Mom! I got it! I know what you were saying now." She felt a sweet bit of redemption in that.

Stew21
03-27-2008, 01:43 AM
I need to find one of our better derails with Python. We had a couple of trolls that really just asked for it. (that was pre-landfill, so they stayed in those threads).

mscelina
03-27-2008, 01:47 AM
yep, you need to. any twoll abuse is funny to me--Monty Python would just make it better.

maxmordon
03-27-2008, 01:53 AM
The pope and Michelangelo:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J4oKXagF3IE

sheadakota
03-27-2008, 02:55 AM
I wish to report a burglary

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L57-vQvo34E

Dawno
03-27-2008, 03:15 AM
Confuse a Cat, Ltd. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B2Je1CEPkUM) (seems appropriate with all the LOLcat stuff around here :) )


CONFUSE-A-CAT LIMITED
INCORPORATING
AMAZE-A-VOLE LTD
STUN-A-STOAT LTD
PUZZLE-A-PUMA LTD
STARTLE-A-THOMPSON'S GAZELLE LTD
BEWILDEREBEEST INC
DISTRACT-A-BEE

Mr Flibble
03-27-2008, 03:26 AM
*jumps out from behind a bush*

No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!

wyntermoon
03-27-2008, 03:31 AM
Actually, my favorite part of MP&THG are the credits. Damn those llamas anyway.

Moose bites can be quite nasty.

Ol' Fashioned Girl
03-28-2008, 12:35 AM
The Fish Slapping Dance (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhJQp-q1Y1s&NR=1)

shyne
09-30-2008, 01:16 AM
I fart in your general direction

JimmyB27
09-30-2008, 08:53 PM
Of course you feel better for it. Quoting Monty Python soothes a writer's soul. :)
I prefer posting xkcd comics -

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/monty_python.jpg (http://xkcd.com/16/)

Pagey's_Girl
09-30-2008, 10:33 PM
"He's not the Messiah! He's actually a very naughty boy."

vixey
09-30-2008, 10:37 PM
I love Monty Python. But it's so much easier to post another, longer thread: http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=35906

Pagey's_Girl
09-30-2008, 10:40 PM
Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!

Yeshanu
09-30-2008, 11:56 PM
I'm a Canadian. I'm glad to be a Canadian, because we can be...

A lumberjack! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zey8567bcg&NR=1)

Mr Flibble
10-01-2008, 12:40 AM
Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!

You second hand donkey bottom biter you!

And for Jimmy:

Yes, we are all different.

I'm not.

Unique
10-01-2008, 08:22 AM
From Time describing Candide by Voltaire


(Imagine Monty Python circa 1759).


o.0-

zoinks!

I had a very sad day once, playing an online game. The party were having a bit of fun quoting whole films verbatum( as you do), then some poor, poor, poooor person pipes up 'Who's Monty Python?'

We had to kick him from the group -- obviously he did not derserve to live

double zoinks!
I thought I lived under a rock. whew.

Williebee
10-01-2008, 08:26 AM
One day, Stew, all this will be yours.

crazynance
02-02-2009, 03:46 AM
.... I think there's something wrong with my parrot....

sheadakota
02-02-2009, 04:56 AM
Oh Yea!! Monty Python Lives- I have to go to youtube now-

Chumplet
02-02-2009, 05:55 AM
They published a facsimile of their Grail script back when the movie first came out. I still have it. I tried keeping up with the movie while reading the script and it was pretty close, except for the scribbles.

crazynance
02-02-2009, 06:22 PM
"Catch that for me, Deirdre.. "

Carmy
02-02-2009, 06:42 PM
A question (?) was posted in the grammar section a couple of days ago that reminded me of the Ministry of Silly Walks.

Hillgate
02-02-2009, 09:27 PM
BRIAN'S MOTHER (assuming the position): Oh, hello centurion...

crazynance
02-02-2009, 10:08 PM
'I'm not dead yet"

crazynance
02-02-2009, 10:35 PM
http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=jNBNqUdqm1E&feature=related

village idiot? Wurzel is that you?

blacbird
02-03-2009, 12:50 AM
"Notice how they do not so much fly, as plummet."

caw

CarolSanDiego
02-04-2009, 12:13 AM
I use "I fart in your general direction" as often as I can in conversation.

One of my favorite scenes in Holy Grail has this line: "Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government."

'tis but a scratch. I've had worse.

Dale Emery
02-04-2009, 04:41 AM
Well I think that all right-thinking people in this country are sick and tired of being told that ordinary decent people are fed up in this country with being told that they are sick and tired. Well, I'm certainly not. But I'm sick and tired of being told that I am.

crazynance
02-05-2009, 12:04 AM
that's it, is it? That walk is hardly silly at all.

regdog
02-12-2009, 02:05 AM
http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l117/regdog/camelot.jpg




Lovely Spam (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anwy2MPT5RE)

crazynance
02-12-2009, 08:31 PM
ROFL! That is brilliant..

KiwiPhoenix
02-13-2009, 10:58 AM
'How do you know she is a witch?'
'Why, she turned me into a newt!'
'A newt?'
'... ... I got better.'
'... BURN HER ANYWAYS! BURN!'

Monkey
02-18-2009, 05:18 AM
I LOVE Life of Brian.

But there's this one old Monty Python sketch that always makes me grin when I think of it, and that tends to be often. It's very like something from Far Side (which I also love), but even so, I'm not sure why it has stuck with me like it has.

There're these two old ladies watching TV. On top of the TV is a glowing plastic penguin, and the two of them start arguing over why it's there. Then, inexplicably, it explodes. One of the ladies jumps and yells, "PEANUT BUTTER!"

"Why'd you say that?"

"I panicked!"

Rainy Night
02-21-2009, 12:44 AM
My favorite "Brian" quote

...Blessed are the Cheesmakers...

Angie
02-21-2009, 09:43 PM
So, there you are! I might have known it would end up like this. To think of all the love and affection I've wasted on you. Well, if that's how you treat your poor old mother in the autumn years of her life, all I can say is, 'Go ahead. Be crucified. See if I care.' I might have known it would end up like this. Sex, sex. That's all young people are interested in nowadays. I don't know what the world's coming to.

flyingtart
02-24-2009, 06:45 PM
http://i271.photobucket.com/albums/jj153/flyingtart/Thisisanargument.jpg

williemeikle
02-24-2009, 07:35 PM
I LOVE Life of Brian.

But there's this one old Monty Python sketch that always makes me grin when I think of it, and that tends to be often. It's very like something from Far Side (which I also love), but even so, I'm not sure why it has stuck with me like it has.

There're these two old ladies watching TV. On top of the TV is a glowing plastic penguin, and the two of them start arguing over why it's there. Then, inexplicably, it explodes. One of the ladies jumps and yells, "PEANUT BUTTER!"

"Why'd you say that?"

"I panicked!"

And you can see it again right now :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1k1ccguXiws

Monkey
02-26-2009, 06:47 AM
:D

Thanks, Willie. That's actually a slightly different version than the one I remember, but still pretty funny.

BrittaMoline
03-01-2009, 11:31 PM
"Good thing I didn't mention the dirty knife."

StarDrifter
03-08-2009, 02:13 PM
RIIIIIGHT! This is how to defend yourself, from an attacker, armed with a BANANA!!!

regdog
03-09-2009, 11:55 PM
Whizzo Chocolate (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Sy03KS0Pa0)Anyone?

regdog
03-09-2009, 11:59 PM
Anyone ever climb the Northface of Uxbridge Road (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9U0tDU37q2M&feature=related)

Sweetleaf
03-12-2009, 06:27 AM
Must be time for the comfy chair... holding on the soft cushions though.

regdog
03-13-2009, 07:14 PM
Ask him Three Questions (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IMxWLuOFyZM&feature=related)

Pagey's_Girl
03-16-2009, 05:47 AM
"I'm Brian - and so is my wife!"

regdog
03-16-2009, 04:39 PM
http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l117/regdog/shrubbery.jpg

RocketMonkey
03-18-2009, 02:40 PM
"He's not the Messiah, he's a very naughty boy!"

flyingtart
03-18-2009, 03:20 PM
"You have three last chances."

Leukman
03-18-2009, 08:55 PM
Tis but a flesh wound!

I've had worse!

...

Oh, I see - run away then will ya? Come back and fight you yellow pansy! The black night always triumphs!!

Ludka
03-27-2009, 12:30 AM
-We are now, no longer the Knights who Say 'Ni'. We are now the Knights who say..."Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG. Zoom-Boing. Z'nourrwringmm."

-Ni

-*shh*

Little1
02-19-2010, 06:06 PM
King of Swamp Castle: Please! This is supposed to be a happy occasion. Let's not bicker and argue over who killed who.



Roger the Shrubber: Are you saying Ni to that old woman?
King Arthur: Um, yes.
Roger the Shrubber: Oh, what sad times are these when passing ruffians can say Ni at will to old ladies. There is a pestilence upon this land, nothing is sacred. Even those who arrange and design shrubberies are under considerable economic stress in this period in history.
King Arthur: Did you say shrubberies?
Roger the Shrubber: Yes, shrubberies are my trade. I am a shrubber. My name is Roger the Shrubber. I arrange, design, and sell shrubberies.

Sunnyside
02-19-2010, 10:08 PM
I wonder where that fish can be??

Wouldn't you like to know?

Elias Graves
02-20-2010, 02:28 AM
Hello Mrs Gorilla
Hello Mrs Nongorilla
Been shopping?
No
Where you been?
Shopping
What'd you buy?
A piston engine
Why in the world did you buy a piston engine?
It was a bargain!

I think that's close.

EG

Elias Graves
02-20-2010, 02:30 AM
Oh, and there's a dead bishop on the landing.

Oh, dear, that's the third one this week

EG

SirOtter
02-20-2010, 08:50 PM
Crunchy, raw, unboned real dead frog.

crazynance
02-21-2010, 08:49 PM
we are the knights of Nee

regdog
02-22-2010, 03:17 PM
Crunchy, raw, unboned real dead frog.

It wouldn't be crunchy if we took the bones out

sheadakota
02-22-2010, 03:37 PM
I'm sure this has been quoted before- but...

You're mother is a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries

( I think I got that right)

SaraP
02-22-2010, 07:16 PM
Number 1 - The Larch.

CaroGirl
02-22-2010, 08:51 PM
I'm sure this has been quoted before- but...

You're mother is a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries

( I think I got that right)
It was quoted, by you, two years ago in post #7. :) Must be one of your faves.

"How long is it?"
"That's a rather personal question, isn't it?"

CaroGirl
02-22-2010, 08:52 PM
They published a facsimile of their Grail script back when the movie first came out. I still have it. I tried keeping up with the movie while reading the script and it was pretty close, except for the scribbles.
I have that too. It's v. cool.

SaraP
02-22-2010, 09:02 PM
Oh, I forgot one. As a doula, the whole "Machine that Goes Bing" sketch is a staple, but I especially love the line "You're not qualified!"

Fallen
02-26-2010, 10:52 PM
Ceasar: I have a cousin: biggus diccus.
(Laughter)
Ceasar: there something wrong with biggus...diccus?

I swear I'm having Holy Grail clicking coconuts behind my coffin when I die... Has to be my most favourite of all time that movie...

regdog
02-28-2010, 08:45 PM
Ceasar: I have a cousin: biggus diccus.
(Laughter)
Ceasar: there something wrong with biggus...diccus?

I swear I'm having Holy Grail clicking coconuts behind my coffin when I die... Has to be my most favourite of all time that movie...

Just make sure you dead (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dGFXGwHsD_A)

bigb
03-03-2010, 05:09 PM
I fall asleep almost every night with Holy Grail playing in the dvd player.

"say no more"

plaidearthworm
03-20-2010, 09:31 AM
"I want a Last Supper with no kangaroos, twelve disciples and one Christ by Friday lunch, or you don't get paid!"

DennisB
04-02-2010, 05:17 PM
I can't help noticing that most of the quotes are from Holy Grail. That was one of my all-time favorites ("I'm not dead!") and I sometimes cite it as an example of one of several films funnier than Some Like it Hot, which 100 Hollywood critics voted funniest movie of all time. But when I watch the TV show in reruns, much of the humor seems pretty sophomoric. Maybe I'm just getting old.

LOG
08-05-2010, 04:07 AM
Watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail with Henry IV part II subtitles.

regdog
08-05-2010, 04:41 PM
Star Wars Monty Python (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2CLwxObfaNE) There is no way to describe my nerd joy

Mr Flibble
08-05-2010, 04:43 PM
I'm sure this has been quoted before- but...

You're mother is a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries

( I think I got that right)
I wave my private parts at your aunties, you cheesy lot of second hand electric donkey bottom biters.


I have the feeling I've quoted that before too....(ETA: yup, post 18. My memory isn't what it was....)

Although one of my faves is:

One day son, all this will be yours
What the curtains?


And huge...tracts of land

quickWit
08-05-2010, 05:02 PM
Guard: "Oh, we'll keep him in here, obviously! But if he had to leave, and we were with him..."

BarbaraSheridan
08-05-2010, 06:30 PM
Oh, and there's a dead bishop on the landing.

Oh, dear, that's the third one this week



RC or C of E? Tattooed on the back of the neck you know. :tongue

On the upside at least it wasn't one of the Spanish Inquisition.....

Hip-Hop-a-potamus
08-08-2010, 02:00 AM
You MALODOROUS HEAP of PARROT DROPPINGS!!

Kyra Wright
08-09-2010, 10:39 PM
You MALODOROUS HEAP of PARROT DROPPINGS!!
I love your username. :)

Now then, I'm about to go re-watch Holy Grail yet again.

JimmyB27
08-10-2010, 03:08 AM
I can't help noticing that most of the quotes are from Holy Grail. That was one of my all-time favorites ("I'm not dead!") and I sometimes cite it as an example of one of several films funnier than Some Like it Hot, which 100 Hollywood critics voted funniest movie of all time. But when I watch the TV show in reruns, much of the humor seems pretty sophomoric. Maybe I'm just getting old.
Life of Brian gets my vote as not only the best Python film, but quite possibly the best comedy film of all time.

Mr Flibble
08-11-2010, 03:02 AM
Life of Brian gets my vote as not only the best Python film, but quite possibly the best comedy film of all time.

We let my son watch it for the first time a couple of weeks ago. I thought he was going to stop breathing in teh Biggus Dickus sketch. I had to stop the film for a bit when we got to 'He wanks as highly as any in Wome'

He has also taken to wandering round saying 'Wolf nipple chips, get 'em while they're hot, they're lovely'

I love what it says about religion.

Was it 130 takes for Biggus Dickus? AFAIA that's a record. Because they were supposed to laugh a bit and laughed entirely too much. Normally after a few takes, it stops being funny. A testament to Python...

JimmyB27
08-11-2010, 11:59 AM
I love what it says about religion.
This is why I love it. Have you seen the suicide squad deleted scene? Let's just say, I can see why it was deleted. In fact, I'm sort of surprised it even made it to the special features...

Yeshanu
09-09-2010, 12:28 AM
Novel Writing (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogPZ5CY9KoM)

Citizen Cobalt
10-11-2010, 05:33 AM
"And now for something completely different." The one quote that will always stay with me.

Or this one.

"This is a late parrot!"

Aidan Watson-Morris
10-11-2010, 05:54 PM
Quoting the Life of Brian may be offensive, but this line cracks me up everytime!

Brian: You are all different!
Everyone: We are all different!
Random Guy: Not me...

xhouseboy
10-14-2010, 04:32 PM
For a writing site, this one is probably a perfect fit.

Writer father castigating son who's returned to London for a visit after giving up the Bohemian city lifestyle to pursue a career as a miner up in Yorkshire.

Full three minute scene can be seen here (hilarious stuff)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tOSi8zja-3Y

Father: What do you know about getting up at 5 o'clock in morning to fly to Paris, then back to the Old Vic for drinks at 12, sweating the day through press interviews, TV interviews, then getting back here at 10 to wrestle with the problem of a homosexual, nymphomaniac drug addict involved in the ritual murder of a well known Scottish footballer... That's a full working day lad, and don't you forget it. Hampstead wasn't good enough for you, was it? You had to go poncing off to Barnsley, you and your coal mining friends...

Son: Coal mining is a wonderful thing Father, but it's something you'll never understand....

Angelus
10-20-2010, 04:21 AM
bloody brilliant! I forgot about the Ministry of Silly Walks. The Coal Mining one is particularly hilarious.
Father: Laborer!

whacko
10-23-2010, 03:22 AM
Biggles. Fetch... THE CUSHIONS.

I bet nobody expected that.

But what's AW ever done for us, eh?

Don Evan Scott
10-23-2010, 07:31 PM
"Frank was just asking 'What's new?'"

Hip-Hop-a-potamus
10-29-2010, 07:30 PM
"'Ello Mum. 'Ello Dad. There's a dead bishop on the landing, dad."

tlee
11-03-2010, 02:42 AM
"It's Tess Of The D'urbervilles, all over again..."

ShannonR.
03-21-2012, 04:05 AM
I never appreciated the humor of Monty Python before college...

SkyDancer
03-25-2012, 04:03 AM
I would love to have some airplane pilots play that game for real... :D

Captain (C): I'm fed up with that game. Let's play another game. I know what.

First Officer (FO): What?

(The Captain picks up a microphone.)

C: (over intercom) 'Hello, this is your Captain speaking. There is absolutely no cause for alarm.' That will get them thinking.

(First Officer reaches for the microphone.)

C: No, no, no, no. Not yet, not yet. Let it sink in. They will be thinking, er, 'What is there absolutely no cause for alarm about? Are the wings on fire? (over intercom) 'The wings are not on fire.' Now they are thinking, er, 'Why should he say that? So we say...

(Steward enters the cockpit.)

FO: Oh, how are we doing ?

Steward: (looks down the aisle) They've stopped eating; Looking a bit worried.
C: Good.

----------

When I'm on a plane, my neighbors never appreciate it when I tell them that the wings are not on fire...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hh_shsRfXqk

Lee HH Cope
03-26-2012, 08:44 AM
I would love to have some airplane pilots play that game for real... :D

Captain (C): I'm fed up with that game. Let's play another game. I know what.

First Officer (FO): What?

(The Captain picks up a microphone.)

C: (over intercom) 'Hello, this is your Captain speaking. There is absolutely no cause for alarm.' That will get them thinking.

(First Officer reaches for the microphone.)

C: No, no, no, no. Not yet, not yet. Let it sink in. They will be thinking, er, 'What is there absolutely no cause for alarm about? Are the wings on fire? (over intercom) 'The wings are not on fire.' Now they are thinking, er, 'Why should he say that? So we say...

(Steward enters the cockpit.)

FO: Oh, how are we doing ?

Steward: (looks down the aisle) They've stopped eating; Looking a bit worried.
C: Good.

----------

When I'm on a plane, my neighbors never appreciate it when I tell them that the wings are not on fire...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hh_shsRfXqk

Ha! Ha! Monty Python were and still are legends in there own rite! I love to sing the 'Lumberjack Song' just for fun. I have most of the films already, but one fine day I'll attempt to seek out the series box set and probably die laughing!

ShannonR.
03-26-2012, 07:25 PM
My husband has the series DVD box set...I love it!

Silly question...are there any Monty Python drinking games? In my WIP, the MC and another character are huge Monty Python fans, and also my husband and our friends are.

mirandashell
03-27-2012, 11:11 PM
I'm not dead!

Mr Flibble
03-28-2012, 12:32 AM
"'Ello Mum. 'Ello Dad. There's a dead bishop on the landing, dad."

Leicester
How can you tell?
Tattooed on the back of his neck.

crunchyblanket
03-28-2012, 10:20 PM
"Now, it has come to my attention that some pupils have been rubbing linseed oil into the School Cormorant. Now, of course, the Cormorant commerates Empire Day, when we try to remember the names of the people of the town of Sudbury who died to keep China British. So the Cormorant is now OUT OF BOUNDS!"

ShannonR.
04-01-2012, 03:13 AM
I've been singing The Lumberjack Song in my head off and on for the past three days. I may be going insane. :)

Obiwanbeeohbee
04-02-2012, 05:21 AM
Mother: "Wake up, Dear!"

Mr. Pither : "Mum? I'm home? You mean it was all just a dream?"

Mother: "No, Dear. This is the dream. You're still in the cell."

KatieJ
04-02-2012, 11:38 PM
The Larch.

crunchyblanket
04-05-2012, 10:16 PM
The Larch.

Number two. The Horse Chestnut.

*rapturous applause*

KatieJ
04-06-2012, 01:43 AM
You can't expect to wield supreme power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!

BillWobbleSword
06-14-2012, 01:53 AM
Hello, and welcome to the middle of the film.

Hip-Hop-a-potamus
06-14-2012, 03:50 PM
"How about Olson's Standard Book of British Birds? The Expurgated Version."

"The Expurgated Version?"

"Yes, the one without the gannet."

"What do you mean 'the one without the gannet? They've all got the gannet! It's a standard British bird!"

"Well, I don't like them. They wet their nests."

ShannonR.
06-15-2012, 05:47 PM
Anyone up for some Venezuelan Beaver Cheese?

screenscope
06-25-2012, 03:56 AM
Your father was a hamster and your mother smelled of elderberries

rhetoric by rosalie
06-25-2012, 04:23 AM
Always look as the bright side of life....dudu dudu du du du du du du du du du :D

BigWords
06-25-2012, 01:58 PM
A wafer thin mint? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJZPzQESq_0) :D

Rebekkah
06-25-2012, 03:51 PM
She's a witch!