Can the readers be too invested in a pairing?

Don't oversell the earlier romance -- put it in perspective from the get-go. Readers are less likely to feel cheated by a change if they haven't been asked to invest as heavily in the first pairing.

I'd probably like the book, but I'd feel bad for them. But that can be a good thing.

I remember one book (Chasm City) where the main character is just about to kiss a girl and I was like, "Do it! Do it! Come on! DO IT!"

But then he walked away.

I felt bad, but I good way. So, go with it.

Readers can absolutely be too invested in a pairing (or "shipping"). Example: There's a huge community of Harry Potter fans who thought Harry and Hermione were in lurv. After the fifth book (where Hermione *gasp!* isn't perfect! & likes Ron maybe!), they had a MAJOR ANGRY TIME, where one fanfiction writer (known for shipping Hermione/Harry) started a petition to wrest the intellectual rights from the hands of Ms. Rowling, that the shipper might write the next two novels, in the interest of the Most Perfect and Fated Couple of Harry and Hermione.

Thousands of people signed it. Luckily, fans don't actually control content (except in television).

But so long as you don't write it in romantic terms (e.g. "And their love was a love that would be sung for the ages") and lie to your reader, it should be fine. Just be true to the characters.

I'd say you have to give the reader some clues early on that this relationship isn't going to work out. If they're the match made in heaven and I really love them together, I'm going to feel betrayed later on if you rip them apart. But if you seed in a couple of little doubts - maybe they have an argument and then "make up" or if they disagree on something really fundamental (where they want to live, what they want to do, etc.) but choose to ignore it because they're so "in love." Then later when the real world kicks in I will be able to accept the fact that Mrs. Right decides she'd rather pursue her degree in magic and Mr. Right really just wants to keep traveling.

I think it would also be nice to hint at the attraction from the third party from the get-go. Perhaps the second dude is initially attracted to her but puts it "behind him" when he learns she's hooked up with his buddy. Or maybe he thinks she'd never go for a guy like him, whatever.

It doesn't need to be a big deal, but the seeds have to be there.

It might not bother everyone, but I'd personally prefer it if the year gap had a book written about it. If the stuff that happens during it is important enough that they break up and she totally changes as a person, I'd rather know what happened by seeing it happen.

This isn't a relationships issue, but a missing time issue. It's jarring to put down one book, then find in the next one that everyone is different and they saved the world six times while the reader wasn't looking.

Just write it the way that feels right to you, and then read it and see if it worked.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot: Please don't leave a gap.

In Pushing Ice by Alistair Reynolds, there are THREE 10-11 year gaps between segments. They're jarring and not very well handled. It's like having the carpet dragged out from under you, and that can tottally throw some people (like me) Out of a book.

In anther example, there was this webcomic I read...the name of which I don't remember, but the setting was gripping and cool. It had airships and this war thing, and lots of cute looking anime styled characters were getting killed after being introduced like main characters (kinda a cruel thing to do, really), and then...it cuts to something completely different and I totally lost interest or track of what was going on and why I should care.

So...make sure the jump actually works before leaping.

Can readers become too emotionally invested in a pairing? YES!! Oh god, the shipping for Pirates of the Caribbean was absolutely insane. Most of the die hard fans swore they'd hate the movies forever if they didn't get the pairing they wanted in the end (and quite a few stuck to this, from what I saw, after the 3rd movie came out. I got what I wanted, though, lol). I think this is one of the main reasons the 3rd movie made less money than the 2nd.

So you really can piss readers (or viewers, obsessed fans are obsessed fans) off if they feel 'cheated' with a pairing. I do have some couples in my series which don't last, and I handle them by relegating those relationships to the background. I figure if they're only given passing reference, then the readers really can't get too invested. I would be very, very hesitant to have a relationship portrayed as important through the first two books, only to destroy it in the third (or between the second and third, which sounds even worse).

I agree with whats been said already: Don't leave an unaddressed gap, and leave some seeds of discontent from the begining. Also, leave some seeds of possibility between the girl and the sidekick too, to make it more plausable later AND to give the readers a possible alternative that they might not have considered otherwise. That will most likely lessen their complete attachment to the pairing and allow them to feel more acceptant of the change later on.

Overall, it's a toss-up about whether or not it will harm or assist the story. Like Zoombie, I've had the experinec of a GOOD kind of wishing/feeling bad (The Book Theif, to be exact) because overall it made the story more memorable and touching. But I've also STOPPED reading a book because the quick change didn't make any sense nor did I want to accept it. Readers can be like that, and if you don't have the hints or possibilities there from the get-go, it makes it more likely that the readers won't be able to accept the change.

Good luck!

Something else that hasn't been suggested yet -- make sure that your sidekick is a fairly major character from the start. If the readers find him interesting in his own right, those that may have been rooting for the main pairing won't be so miffed that the sidekick ends up with the girl.

Honestly, I don't think you'll have a problem, if all your characters are strong. Certainly not in a self-contained novel.

That Harry Potter stuff someone outlined above: this sort of thing often becomes a problem when writers turn their books into series, where readers become increasingly invested in their own particular interpretation of what they read. You see it also happen in TV series (e.g. Stargate SG-1, whose producers were always being hit with campaigns both for and against the dominant male/female characters getting involved). Not much you can do about it, just ignore it and write your story.

I believe it is a definite possibility. I've done it But most of the time I got too attached was when the author set it up like it was destiny, and then kept screwing it up. Think Ross & Rachael, Lana & Clark, etc.

With what you described in mind, I don't there would be much of a problem if you let the sidekick get the girl. It sounds like you're going to ease that realization in, and that's good. That gives the readers a chance to accept it and see that it really is for the best.

-Feathers

I have many readers who can't believe I don't bring my main character and a major character in one of my books together for more than they have...

They just don't understand that it eventually happens in the third book...

For some reason, having the breakup occur during a "time gap" seems like a missed opportunity to me (but I don't know your story). The best time to get "true colors" characterization is during intense emotional events like that. And how the sidekick plays into the story during that breakup could add immeasurably to the story.

Are these romantic events part of the primary plot, or are they subplots that play through other events in the characters' lives? That could make a huge difference in how they are treated.

This is me reading between the lines. Tell me to what extent I'm off.

1. Plot-wise, it sounds like you're emphasising your female MC. She's the one who changes. She's the one who makes the decisions. At least, that's what I get from your summary.

2. You're somewhat deliberately trying to undermine the "eternal love" theme. You say as much, I think.

3. a) You're deviding the male love interests into "hero" and "sidekick" (they're probably more in your novels, but that's what they appear to be in the love-sub-plot).

b) She starts out with the hero, and moves to the side-kick.

4. Thematically, this has two possible treatments I can see (which maybe enhance each other). Both assume (with 1.) that the focus is on the female MC's emotional growth.

a) A normal thinning of romantics, where "love makes blind" in the beginning, but not so much in the end. This plays a bit into that old cliché that women sleep with the dangerous guys, but marry the nice ones, but it's really just a movement from "do passions run hot?" to "Do we get a long?" (Heroes are often the bold type, who rely on their side-kicks for grounding.)

b) A general emotional growth which adds up to more independence. This involves a shift in values from "protection" to "personal freedom of expression", so that the attractivity parameters change. (Again, heroes often provide a strong sense of morality, which is a bit of an anchor when you're insecure and inexperienced, but may become oppressive if your morals don't exactly match. The sidekicks are generally more diplomatic, often modelled on court jesters. They have to be, or how could they stand being around heroes? )

So the best PoV for the story arc might be the female MC: her relationships would look exactly like what she thinks she's getting. Since the relationship appears to change the way the female MC grows emotionally, it would make sense to let that be reflected in the narrative technique.

If I'm close enough with the above, I'd argue that to give away too much too early could take away from the thematic power, there. As I said, I'd probably tie in the development of the relationship with the development of the character, and synchronise the pacing (which would work naturally through the female MC's point of view). If you give too many hints early on, you open up the path to the "they weren't meant to be together in the first place; she should have realised what she has in the side-kick in the first place." It could devalue the first relationship and romanticise the second in the way I think you don't want. (I doubt you want to say that the first relationship was an error; more that people change. If you focus on the female MC's emotional development, you should have nothing much to worry about.)

If you're doing your job well, you're bound to lose a few readers among the romanticists. I wouldn't compromise the strength of your idea for them, because that would weaken what you want to write. What you might gain in immediate sales, you might lose in long-term reputation.

From me, you'd get bonus points just for the "sidekick gets the girl" line. It's the kind of idea I find appealing. Which means that I'm not really your yardstick for the effectivity of your text. (I'm better suited for the cheerleader role in the background. )

To me, it sounds like you know what you're doing and what you really need is to stop worrying and write the story you want to write.

EDIT: Oh and, btw, the time gap will be covered I assume: "we'll see the stuff that happened too, but not right away" (from the original post)

To some extent Tamora Pierce does something similar in her Song of the Lioness quartet. Which bothered me when I read it, but I ended up realizing it was right. I vote for going for it