Need help planning a murder!

ink wench · Jan 22, 2008

I know I can count on the crazy folks here to help me with this. Right?

Brief background: My MC, Rainia, was recently discovered to be a bastard princess. She basically grew up on the streets so she's now completely over her head and out of place in a palace, trying to learn court etiquette and all that fun stuff. All the rest of the royal family, except for Rainia's father, have been murdered but it was made to look like divine intervention. Now Rainia shows up and is in the murderer's way.

My problem: The murderer has to make an attempt on Rainia's life, but it needs to look like an accident. Rainia must survive completely (or almost completely) unscathed. (Someone else can die in her place if necessary.) Ideally, I'd like it to be Rainia's lack of royal etiquette or disdain for social rules that saves her. And I'm stuck! I have a couple ideas, but I hate them both and see plenty of problems with them. So please, help me out! Anyone? My eternal gratitude is here for the taking.

Calla Lily · Jan 22, 2008

--She goes out riding unchaperoned and the horse mysteriously trips, but she doesn't break her neck like she was supposed to.

--She goes back to visit her old friends because all the court rules are driving her crazy and soemone tries to stab her in a dark street (she still has street-type reflexes and only gets wounded). And/or she takes her maid who thinks slumming would be fun and the maid gets stabbed instead.

--She's kept so carefully guarded she can't take it, and sneaks around the castle, stumbling on a hidden passage, and gets trapped with the murderer.

--One of the new scullery maids is someone she knew on the streets. She befriends the maid in a fit of nostalgia, but the maid is really in the pay of the murderer, sent there to play on her nostalgia. Maid lures her into secret passage or maid stabs her/pushes her down the stairs.

Matera the Mad · Jan 22, 2008

A piano is dropped on her but she is six inches off target because she doesn't pause to say thank you to the person who dropped her off for her music lesson. He gets squashed.

Do we get billing as co-authors?

auntybug · Jan 22, 2008

Don't do the "little bit of poison each day in the coffee bit" ~~hubby~~ she will ~~got~~ get immune.

FennelGiraffe · Jan 22, 2008

They put poison in her fruitcake, but she doesn't eat it because she really hates fruitcake, even though etiquette demands she should have eaten it anyway.

She goes out riding wearing trousers, thus using a regular saddle, instead of the sidesaddle that was gimmicked to come undone when her horse gets spooked.

A statue is cleverly gimmicked so that the first person to walk through a certain doorway activates a trigger and it falls over onto the the second person, but she ignores precedence and goes ahead of someone she shouldn't have.

Sarpedon · Jan 22, 2008

Raina likes meat, so the assassin puts some poison on her fork. However, when the meat course arrives, she eats it with her knife! Make up a poison that makes the throat swell, so it just looks like she choked.

Table manners and poison provide lots of opportunities. She could eat off the wrong plate, eat the dishes out of order, grab something from someone else's plate, turn her nose up at some 'delicacy' or something like that.

Common accidental deaths:

Falling. (maybe she wears sensible footwear)

Getting thrown or kicked by a horse (she might bestride her horse, rather than riding side saddle. I don't know how that would save her, but perhaps)

Fire: (always a risk for ladies of ye olden tymes, due to the massive amount of clothes they wore, (which she might eschew) the fact that floors were often covered with 'rushes' (basically straw) and the many sources of open flame.

Falling objects. Much more common in those days, thanks to crowded conditions, shoddy construction, and lack of safety regulations.

Animal attack; Hunting was a common past time among the rich, and more dangerous animals were common. Boars, Bears, Wild Bulls, Lions (yes, even in Europe), Wolves, Rhinoceruses, Elephants, Tigers, Hyenas, and other animals can all be dangerous. Many of them can also be trained.

(eta ARg! fennel beat me too some of them!)

mscelina · Jan 22, 2008

table manners and etiquette would be a good way to go. If the court is excessively formal, you know the type where they enter in a processional in order of rank, I'd have some other court chick try to one up her by taking the MC's 'rightful' position according to rank (in a bitchy attempt to prove how stupid the MC is) and then have the court bimbo offed by arrow, poison, small axse through the head-you know, the good stuff.

HeronW · Jan 22, 2008

Raina uses the wrong fork for the shrimp--fork is poisoned, not the shrimp. Miffed dottery servant chastizes her, uses the right fork and keels over.

Poison can come in many forms: clothing that becomes warm, becoming fire or acidic ala Medea's gift to Jason's new wife, dripped down a string into the lips of a sleeper, in makeup, in bath water, in fruit still on trees, on the fur of a pet, etc etc.

In animal attacks as murder weapons: the attack animals are trained by smell: dogs would go after something that stank of fox urine, etc. Though any 'killer' animal can be trained to attack any smell, using the natural enemy scent has a better chance of success.

ink wench · Jan 22, 2008

You guys rock! :Hail:

Definitely giving me ideas.... She's been mostly confined to the palace and under heavy supervision, but I think I'm going to get her out of there. I like pushing down the stairs. Simple, effective, and the murderer can rely on someone she trusts to do it so Rainia doesn't see her nearby. Ooh, and I can show off Rainia's reflexes because she helps keep the accidental victim (a bitchy minor character) from getting hurt too badly, thus making for an interesting sub plot with said minor character who is actually about to become Rainia's step-mother (she's also Rainia's age). Yes... distinct possibilities here.

Thank you, everyone!

callalily61 said:
--She goes back to visit her old friends because all the court rules are driving her crazy and soemone tries to stab her in a dark street (she still has street-type reflexes and only gets wounded). And/or she takes her maid who thinks slumming would be fun and the maid gets stabbed instead.

Lily, you're way ahead of me. This happens almost exactly a few more chapters in the future. It's the attempted murder that makes it clear someone's trying to kill her.

HeronW · Jan 22, 2008

Don't make Raina too impervious, give her foibles, mistakes in judgement, but don't kill her off, she sounds like fun!

Judg · Jan 22, 2008

Post titles like that are one of the things that keep me coming back to this place.

slcboston · Jan 24, 2008

Wow, I had no idea formal dinners could be so fatal.

TPCSWR · Jan 24, 2008

HeronW said:
In animal attacks as murder weapons: the attack animals are trained by smell: dogs would go after something that stank of fox urine, etc. Though any 'killer' animal can be trained to attack any smell, using the natural enemy scent has a better chance of success.

Maybe you could use this with a specific type of perfume all the court ladies are supposed to wear, or that is given to Raina by the murderer (or accomplices), but Raina refuses to put it on so the animals don't attack her.

benbradley · Jan 24, 2008

ink wench said:
...
Brief background: My MC, Rainia, was recently discovered to be a bastard princess. She basically grew up on the streets so she's now completely over her head and out of place in a palace, trying to learn court etiquette and all that fun stuff. All the rest of the royal family, except for Rainia's father, have been murdered but it was made to look like divine intervention. Now Rainia shows up and is in the murderer's way.

My problem: The murderer has to make an attempt on Rainia's life, but it needs to look like an accident. Rainia must survive completely (or almost completely) unscathed. (Someone else can die in her place if necessary.) Ideally, I'd like it to be Rainia's lack of royal etiquette or disdain for social rules that saves her.

Hmm, I think it would be neat if instead of her "lack of royal etiquette," it were specifically her street smarts that save her, that she knows how to protect herself from things that those who grew up in royalty would never have a clue about.

ETA: Of course, everyone around her, being involved all their lives either serving or being a part of royalty, strongly dismiss the idea that anyone could learn anything of value on the street or anywhere outside High Society, and so they BLAME her escaping death on her "lack of royal etiquette."

FennelGiraffe said:
They put poison in her fruitcake, but she doesn't eat it because she really hates fruitcake, even though etiquette demands she should have eaten it anyway.

But OF COURSE she "eats" the fruitcake, even to the point of putting it to her mouth, pretending to bite but then palming the food (those sleight-of-hand card tricks she learned on the street came in handy) and "chews" and "swallows," though most regrettably, her dog companion, ever present under the table at all her meals, dies.

This could add another mystery, perhaps to be resolved later in the story: Did she know the fruitcake was poisoned, or did she just hate fruitcake? This thought would surely run through the murderer's mind, if no one else's.

Sarpedon · Jan 25, 2008

c'mon, she grew up on the streets, not in the circus, and not in the super secret ninja academy. The fact is that a street person will be tough, yes and know tricks as to how to find food, stay warm, beg and steal and so forth, and probably would be better than average in a scuffle. What they won't have probably is any kind of skill like knife fighting or magic tricks that require lots and lots of practice, because where do you practice knife fighting? Does she get in one every day? Who would teach her magic tricks? Unless thats how she makes her living, she probably wouldn't have the time to learn.

And quite frankly, why would being a street person improve your reflexes? I have quick reflexes, because I study fencing. Most street people I meet tend to be sluggish and inattentive. There's little glamour in it.

In fact, I'm interested; How did Raina make her living as a street person? did she steal? Sell flowers, oranges or matches (or meat pies, heh heh)? Scrounge and recycle? Beg? Do song and dance? Bum fights? Turning tricks? There are lots of career posibilities, and it might help to consider how it was that she kept herself fed before you decide what her strengths and weaknesses are.

ink wench · Jan 25, 2008

benbradley said:
Hmm, I think it would be neat if instead of her "lack of royal etiquette," it were specifically her street smarts that save her, that she knows how to protect herself from things that those who grew up in royalty would never have a clue about.

Her street smarts (and largely her old friends) do help her out, just not in this situation.

Sarpedon said:
c'mon, she grew up on the streets, not in the circus, and not in the super secret ninja academy. The fact is that a street person will be tough, yes and know tricks as to how to find food, stay warm, beg and steal and so forth, and probably would be better than average in a scuffle. What they won't have probably is any kind of skill like knife fighting or magic tricks that require lots and lots of practice, because where do you practice knife fighting? Does she get in one every day? Who would teach her magic tricks? Unless thats how she makes her living, she probably wouldn't have the time to learn.

That's pretty much it. She also knows where to find shady characters and learn interesting information.

Sarpedon said:
And quite frankly, why would being a street person improve your reflexes? I have quick reflexes, because I study fencing. Most street people I meet tend to be sluggish and inattentive. There's little glamour in it.

Um, in itself, I doubt it would. I never said it improved her reflexes, and I don't see how I'm making her life out to be glamorous. She's not portrayed that way in my story.

Sarpedon said:
In fact, I'm interested; How did Raina make her living as a street person? did she steal? Sell flowers, oranges or matches (or meat pies, heh heh)? Scrounge and recycle? Beg? Do song and dance? Bum fights? Turning tricks? There are lots of career posibilities, and it might help to consider how it was that she kept herself fed before you decide what her strengths and weaknesses are.

Actually, she did many of those things at various points in her life. Believe me, I've lived with this character for almost a year now. She has a thorough history, personality, strengths, faults, and voice, but I'd rather not go into to it because I don't like discussing my stories while I'm working on them. I made this post simply because I was stuck on a detail and was hoping for some inspiration, which i got. I appreciate your desire to help though.

Need help planning a murder!

ink wench

ray of motherf#%&ing sunshine

Calla Lily

On hiatus

Matera the Mad

Bartender, gimme a Linux Mint

auntybug

teh other evil broad

FennelGiraffe

It's green they say

Sarpedon

mscelina

Teh doommobile, drivin' rite by you

HeronW

Down Under Fan

ink wench

ray of motherf#%&ing sunshine

HeronW

Down Under Fan

Judg

DISENCHANTED coming soon

slcboston

Pasture-ized

TPCSWR

Unashamed Play School Fan

benbradley

It's a doggy dog world

Sarpedon

ink wench

ray of motherf#%&ing sunshine