Logline/Synopsis - Revealing twists

It's my understanding (through reading articles and posts by writers more clever and experienced than I) that you tickle curiosity with the logline, and reveal all in the synopsis.

If you haven't already, see link removed via request from other site's Webmaster.The Construction of a Logline article on Chris Lockhart's highly recommended Two Adverbs site.

And, from link removed via request from other site's Webmaster.Wordplay's most excellent link removed via request from other site's Webmaster.Columns:

38. Breaking the Ice. The query letter. Getting to the second date. Twenty common mistakes from the slushpile. Three real query examples: the good, the bad and the ugly. (Includes links to three query letters.)

...And if they like your query letter and ask you for an treatment/synopsis:

37. link removed via request from other site's Webmaster.Proper Treatment. The ultimate no-win situation. No matter what you put in, they'll criticize what isn't there. And you don't even get paid. (Includes links to two outlines & one treatment.)

If you already have an agent, that's great. If not, you might also want to take a peek at this thread on the Done Deal board:

The Futility of Pursuing an Agent ...which is a realistic insider look at the agent situation. The thread title speaks for itself, so be prepared for disappointment, but obviously you'll make your own mind up.

-Derek

Ron Maiden said:

i always felt this would actually cheapen the impact

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I agree. I hate loglines and synopses.

i hate them too. if your script isn't a simple simon then your logline can be tough. you gotta hit those links dp posted for you and study.

anyhoo -

how much do you reveal when writing this kinda stuff, because i'm going to have to do the synopsis next?

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the purpose of the logline/synopsis is to get them to read the script. it's the overall plan. the script is the blueprint.

you have to SELL the idea first. if you wanted to buy an expensive condo but had doubts because it seemed like it had potential but you just weren't sure you'd probably not make the trip to check it out... unless the agent told you the kicker -- you've got your very on swimming pool on the penthouse level. you'd check that out even if you knew it was beyond your means b/c you've just gotta see it for yourself. oh yeah, it hasn't been built yet so you'll have to read the blueprint/script first.

and... the producers are the construction workers. they definitely want to see that there's a swimming pool on the roof so they can determine whether the kicker is enough. they're not reading to get the surprise. they want to know what it is and check out the process of how you got there -- your execution.

does that make sense?

In a synopsis, you include everything.

But a logline is a little different.

Since your twist occurs at the very end of the script, I would suggest NOT to include it in the logline.

A logline is a "trailer" for your script. You provide enough info to entice - but no more. If someone wants to know everything, they'll ask for a synopsis.

A synopsis for PLANET OF THE APES (1968) would include the Statue of Liberty reveal. A logline wouldn't.

Of course, as the writer, you can do anything you want. There are no rules to this game.

My rule of thumb is that a logline must include the hook but not a twist.

The hook is part of the concept - while a twist is part of the story.

In THE SIXTH SENSE, the boy seeing dead people is the hook, Bruce Willis being dead is the twist. I wouldn't include the twist in the logline.

A psychiatrist struggles to help a young boy overcome a bizarre affliction - he sees dead people.

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Of course, this concept is genuinely interesting without the use of the twist. Most writers are not that lucky to hock a concept with such inherent intrigue. This is why many writers feel the need to include the twist ending in the logline; they fear the concept isn't interesting without it - which doesn't bode well for the project.

Furthermore, a fantastic twist after a 118-pages of a bad script or a boring concept is meaningless.

A psychiatrist struggles to help a young boy overcome a bizarre affliction - he sees dead people.

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personally, i hope to NEVER feel compelled to use the word "struggles" EVER in any of my loglines. it's the most used (to exhaustion) and least unique logline word ever.

that's my opinion and i'm sticking to it!

personally, i hope to NEVER feel compelled to use the word "struggles" EVER in any of my loglines. it's the most used (to exhaustion) and least unique logline word ever.

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It's my choice of word and there's no rule or expectation or compulsion that says it has to be used.

I like the word because it implies an overarching action and has an "external" dramatic and cinematic quality. Since most scripts lack these qualities, often the word cannot be used - at least not legitmately.

I've written tens of thousands of loglines and use it often. To be honest, I've had quite a bit of sucess with it.