Worst lyricists in rock?

Bubastes · Oct 18, 2007

I saw this on the NPR site this morning (I couldn't view the Blender magazine article from work

)

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=15353192

Yeah, I agree that Sting has some clunker lyrics, but I think Jon Bon Jovi should have taken the "worst lyricist" spot.

Your thoughts?

Marlys · Oct 18, 2007

Ha! For those who can view it, here's the link.

But I can't believe they left Robert Hazard off the list. We're riding on the escalator of life/We're shopping in the human mall.

Or how about the Bee Gees, who along with little brother Andy Gibb wrote this grammatical treasure: And in this world of people, there's only you and I/There ain't nothing come between us in the end ("Shadow Dancing").

RG570 · Oct 18, 2007

These geeks need a good asskicking for putting Henry Rollins on there.

I'm sure he'd gladly give it to them.

Steve Miller and Lynyrd Skynyrd are the worst lyricists of all time.

Nolita · Oct 18, 2007

That was...

Who the? How the? What the? Oh yeah -- a waste of time. People get paid to do that? Get paid? We're wasting our talents people.

But RG570, you listen to The Steve Miller Band and Lynyrd Skynyrd for the lyrics? Whoa. The lyrics?

And a bunch of the listed "worst lyricists" are musicians whose music I listen to first for the music and secondly for the lyrics. If I even bother listening to the lyrics at all. The others were/are just yucky. And how did they gauge quality level anyway? How did K-Fed rank lower than Sting? How did half the "artists" mentioned rank lower than Sting?

Does anyone have the mathematical formula used to rank the "winners"?

blacbird · Oct 18, 2007

Ditto both Steve Miller and Lynyrd Skynyrd. Add Dewey Bunnell (America) to the list.

caw

poetinahat · Oct 18, 2007

RG570 said:
These geeks need a good asskicking for putting Henry Rollins on there.

I'm sure he'd gladly give it to them.

Steve Miller and Lynyrd Skynyrd are the worst lyricists of all time.

blacbird said:
Ditto both Steve Miller and Lynyrd Skynyrd. Add Dewey Bunnell (America) to the list.

caw

I'm so glad the Steve Miller thing isn't just me.

Just something to think about:

I see a little silhouetto of a man
Scaramouche! Scaramouche! Do you do the fandango?
Thunderbolts and lightning, very very frightening me!
Galileo! Galileo! Galileo! Galileo Figaro!
etc.

jennifer75 · Oct 18, 2007

Kid Rock

Salem · Oct 18, 2007

jennifer75 said:
Kid Rock

But jennifer, you just bought his latest CD the other day and told me it rocked. Now I'm confused.

jennifer75 · Oct 18, 2007

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

JRH · Oct 18, 2007

A FEW Questions.

1. What's their criteria for determining the worst lyrics, beyond their own questionable taste, and suspect "critical" skills?

2. What would they consider good lyrics, (be it for "Rock" or any other Genre)?

3. Do they understand the distinction between Verse and Poetry, which class Song Lyrics should be considered as, and why?

4. Can they, (or you) name a single Songwriter whose Lyrics (Rock or otherwise), can be considered as more than "Minor" Poetry, at it's best, (And if they, or you, cite Dylan or Leonard Cohen, I'll BARF - because the Former is, by his own admission, simply a "Social Critic" ,who writes in Verse, and the Latter, enjoys his "legitimate" reputation as a "minor" poet, NOT for his song lyrics, as "poetic" they might be, but for his serious "Poems" about his own life and the "Jewish" experience)?

Think about it.

Jim Hoye, (JRH)

ChunkyC · Oct 18, 2007

Whoever wrote that insipid "Yummy yummy yummy, I got love in my tummy" should be made to watch "The View" for 72 hours straight.

JRH · Oct 19, 2007

Hi Chunky,

"Yummy, Yummy, Yummy" was written by Arthur Resnick and Joey Levine and
recorded by Ohio Express (1968) and appears on Billboard Greatest Hits of 1968.

Amazingly, it was also recorded by The 1910 Fruitgum Company, Sha Na Na, Julie London, SIX FEET UNDER Soundtrack,Baccara, Hit Crew, Tommy Roe, and The Royal Guardsmen, along with a few other groups I've never heard of.

Levine was considered the Godfather of "Bubblegum", and has, since his "Bubblegum years", become a successful jingle writer and singer, who has worked on well-known campaigns for clients that include Dr. Pepper, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Coca Cola, Jello, Budweiser, 7-Up, Alka Seltzer (after all that, he'd need it!), NBC, ABC, Bounce and many others.

Arthur Resnick was an accomplished writer on his own, already having penned early rock hits "Under The Boardwalk", "A Little Bit Of Heaven" and "Sand In My Shoes", before teaming with Levine.

Hope that tells you more than you ever wanted to know about it.

Jim Hoye, (JRH)

blacbird · Oct 19, 2007

poetinahat said:
I'm so glad the Steve Miller thing isn't just me.

Some people call him Maurice.

Some call him the pompatus of love.

caw

joetrain · Oct 19, 2007

you just quoted their two best lines.

larocca · Oct 19, 2007

Talk to you later
Save it for some other guy
Talk to you later
Don't want to hear it again tonight
Talk to you later
I will see you around

larocca · Oct 19, 2007

Caught you with your
Backfield in motion
I'm gonna hafta penalize you

blacbird · Oct 19, 2007

JRH said:
4. Can they, (or you) name a single Songwriter whose Lyrics (Rock or otherwise), can be considered as more than "Minor" Poetry, at it's best, (And if they, or you, cite Dylan or Leonard Cohen, I'll BARF - because the Former is, by his own admission, simply a "Social Critic" ,who writes in Verse,(JRH)

As opposed to . . . oh . . . lesseee . . . Carl Sandburg, Lord Byron, e. e. cummings, T. S. Eliot, Alexander Pope, Walt Whitman . . . yeah, just a "Social Critic".

caw

larocca · Oct 19, 2007

I could quote "Never Been To Me" (sung by Charlene) in its entirety, but then you'd have to hunt me down and kill me.

III · Oct 19, 2007

That might be one of the dumbest lists I've ever seen. Whoever compiled it is a jackass.

And for the record, I'd probably have to vote for David Lee Roth or Stephen Pearcy (RATT) for their "floundering in a sea of retarded sexuality" lyrics. (That's a quote from Spinal Tap, lest anyone think me eloquent or unkind.)

Devil Ledbetter · Oct 20, 2007

larocca said:
I could quote "Never Been To Me" (sung by Charlene) in its entirety, but then you'd have to hunt me down and kill me.

The lyrical equivalent of syrup of ipecac.

Nolita · Oct 20, 2007

blacbird said:
Some people call him Maurice.

Some call him the pompatus of love.

caw

I heard the song wrong. Not the first time I've done it but...

"Some people call me Maurice(important to roll the R sound).

*wolf-whistle* {of import is it's a guitar wolf-whistle. Not a real one. It's important because the guitar-wolf-whistle is the only sexy wolf-whistle in existence. If a guy just wolf-whistles it's gross. But if he plays a wolf-whistle on the guitar it's sexy.}

Cuz I speak of the pompatus of love."

Shadow_Ferret · Oct 20, 2007

How can anyone say Steve Miller?

"Really love your peaches, want to shake your tree" is an absolute classic!

I can't believe they consider Aqualung the worst, "Sitting on a park bench, eyeing little girls with bad intent" is damn near poetic.

And Donavan, talk about some classic acid lyrics.

Who compiled that list? Kids under 25 who just took everything out of context? You had to live the times, man!

larocca · Oct 20, 2007

Ain't a thing wrong with Steve Miller's lyrics.

Abracadabra
Wanna reach out and grab ya

Admit it, folks. You love that song. Steve Miller's lyrics are just fine.

RG570 · Oct 20, 2007

Can't stand any of his songs. Not a single one of them.

Come on, listen to take the money and run and tell me that is not the most painful jumble of words set to music ever written.

ChunkyC · Oct 20, 2007

JRH said:
Hi Chunky,

"Yummy, Yummy, Yummy" was written by Arthur Resnick and Joey Levine and ... *snip* ... Hope that tells you more than you ever wanted to know about it.

Jim Hoye, (JRH)

Yes.

Steve Miller rocks, but I barely pay attention to the lyrics. Then again, you gotta love stepping up to the mic and singing, "Shu Ba Da Du Ma Ma Ma Ma"

Worst lyricists in rock?

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