Can you see your dialogue....

ZannaPerry · Sep 19, 2007

being said by a real person??

I think that's a trick about writing dialogue, and how to make it real. Can you actually see a person you know, or you just see walking down the street, and you strike up a conversation with them......can you see them saying a line or two from your book?

Where's the invisible line between real and cheesy??

PeeDee · Sep 19, 2007

I can see them saying all the lines of dialog from my books. That's vitally important to me. With few exceptions (robots, for example, since that's so prominent in my signature), I am always aware of how my dialog sounds.

melaniehoo · Sep 19, 2007

Read it out loud. If it sounds cheesy it probably is, but that's only bad if it wasn't your intention. I sometimes have to force the contractions and 'gonna' spellings, since that's how we talk.

JoNightshade · Sep 19, 2007

I always get way too casual and almost too realistic with my dialogue. I have to go in afterwards and clean out all the instances of "Uh," "you know," "well," etc. etc. They are okay in moderation, but putting that in as much as people do in real life is just annoying. I think about it like the movies. If actors said "um" and "well" as much as people do in real life, we'd think maybe they didn't know how to act.

MidnightMuse · Sep 19, 2007

Dialog is huge with me, I love doing it. The trick is to say the lines outloud yourself, if you're feeling unsure about them.

I listen to my characters talk to each other, in their own voices and inflections, all the time in my head - so I know when one of them tries to say something he wouldn't, or use a word that isn't really him. Once you know your characters inside and out, what they say comes naturally.

Wraith · Sep 19, 2007

I don't know, in a fantasy setting like mine is it would sound awkard if it was too colloquial, and there are always the fleeting char who speaks in a rather 'solemn' way. :Shrug:

Dunno if that's ok or not, but it actually sounded cheesier when I tried to make it more natural. Anyway, I always look out for too long or complicated phrases and words, so the dialogue is easy to say out loud and the words flow in conversation (at least that's what I strive for, heh). I think that even if it's not quite the everyday slang, it can still be natural and real-sounding, though I've got a long way to get there.

Southern_girl29 · Sep 19, 2007

I try to make sure my dialogue is as realistic as it can be, without so many of the "um's" and "wells" like Jo said. The way I learned to write dialogue was to listen to people speak. You can pick up on a lot of speech habits that way. I also do a lot of interviews and have to write down what people say so I can quote them. That helped, too.

ishtar'sgate · Sep 19, 2007

Yeah, read it out loud. I don't imagine people I see on the street speaking my dialogue. My WIP is about ancient Babylon. Clothes aren't right. Language isn't right. Can't have someone in ancient Babylon saying, "So, like, didja see that new movie? Totally, like, totally out there." Nah.

Linnea

DeleyanLee · Sep 19, 2007

SuzyB said:
being said by a real person??

I think that's a trick about writing dialogue, and how to make it real. Can you actually see a person you know, or you just see walking down the street, and you strike up a conversation with them......can you see them saying a line or two from your book?

Where's the invisible line between real and cheesy??

I read every word of the novel aloud--preferrably to another person, but my dog will do if there's no one else. This allows me to get the feel for the dialogue (along with finding an amazing amount of hidden errors I couldn't find before) since it is being said by a real person (me).

If I read it aloud and it sounds cheesy, it gets changed--unless it was intended to sound cheesy, of course.

Richard White · Sep 19, 2007

Again, echoing the "read it out loud" sentiments.

In my first novel, I actually assigned voices to my main characters from various tv/movie actors. Not that I tried to specifically imitate them, but when I played with the dialogue in my head, I imagined these people speaking the lines. It helped force me to make dialogue sound like four individuals speaking instead of them all sounding like me.

blacbird · Sep 19, 2007

Don't just "read" it. ACT it out, including any physical gestures you may have punctuated it with. Become the individual characters when you do it. I do it all the time. It's cured many a flaw.

caw

maestrowork · Sep 19, 2007

Yup, read it loud. Or better yet, ask someone else to read it loud. If it doesn't sound real to you, it probably really doesn't sound real to the readers.

Realistic dialogue has nothing to do with fillers like "um," "uh," "well..." It has to do with tones, structure (for example, people don't usually speak in complete sentences), word choices, etc. Dialogue is "simulated" conversation; still, they should sound realistic but not exactly real (in real speech, people do have a lot of fillers such as um, eh, well, like, you know, etc.). These fillers CAN be added to add flavor to the characterization, but anything overdone is badly done.

MidnightMuse · Sep 19, 2007

blacbird said:
Don't just "read" it. ACT it out, including any physical gestures you may have punctuated it with. Become the individual characters when you do it. I do it all the time. It's cured many a flaw.

caw

Yanno, I did that once a long time ago - I found a plethora of "running hands through the hair" "scratching the chin" and "shrugging". I had a paragraph that came out with enough semaphore to land a jumbo jet.

Cured me.

BenPanced · Sep 19, 2007

The first time I had somebody other than myself edit a story, he told me I have a real ear for dialogue. He said he believed people were actually speaking, especially the way I have close friends banter back and forth, exchanging inside jokes. I told him it's the way my friends and I speak to each other.

Esentially agreeing with Southern girl29. Listen to the way other people speak. Listen to the way you speak; it's going to be different when you're speaking to friends, family, and coworkers, so pick up on those patterns and use them.

akiwiguy · Sep 19, 2007

I definitely act out dialog in my mind, and if someone observed me I think I actually physically mimic body language of the characters and act out the scene as I write.

Thinking about it, I definitely like novels with a lot of well written dialog.

An aside on dialog, and thinking movies for a moment, love him or hate him... a master of dialog is Tarantino. I was delighted to see that one of my favourite books on writing cites the beginning of Reservoir Dogs. A group of guys planning a bank heist gathered in a cafe having quirky debates, first of all about the meaning of the lyrics of Madonna's Like a Virgin, then about the ethics of tipping waitresses. Odd topics, and yet they become compelling and draw us into the scene. Pulp Fiction is similar, with strange and often very clever dialog woven right through the movie.

MMWyrm · Sep 19, 2007

Agree with blacbird - I act out my dialogue parts all the time. In public sometimes.

MidnightMuse · Sep 19, 2007

MMWyrm said:
Agree with blacbird - I act out my dialogue parts all the time. In public sometimes.

Makes those love scenes even more enjoyable.

(back to thread)

Ziljon · Sep 19, 2007

I record my pages and listen back to them in the car on my way home. It helps to keep the writing, not only the dialogue, sounding real and natural.

maestrowork · Sep 19, 2007

MidnightMuse said:
Makes those love scenes even more enjoyable.

(back to thread)

You talk during your sex scene, in public? My, my, my.

MidnightMuse · Sep 19, 2007

I'm a multi-tasker

Leigh Walker · Sep 19, 2007

I might have a diagnosable problem, but I actually hear my characters talking in my head. All the time. Even when I am not writing. I may need help.

That being said. I agree that reading outloud is helpful, but I find it more helpful to have someone else read it outloud like a couple of other people have said. I find that when I read it, I might add inflections and tones to it that may not come accross to a reader. If they read it to me, and it doesnt come accross the way it would if I were reading it, then I know it needs adjusting.

the problem is finding someone with nothing more to do than to read my WIP out loud to me....

maestrowork · Sep 19, 2007

Leigh Walker said:
the problem is finding someone with nothing more to do than to read my WIP out loud to me....

Try local writer groups, libraries, or actors.

ZannaPerry · Sep 19, 2007

I don't see the problem using "gonna" or "wanna" or even "you know." We say those words in every day conversations, and I've even seen some authors write them into their dialogue. Yeah, it's a spelling error but aren't books suppose to be as real as can be??

maestrowork · Sep 19, 2007

SuzyB said:
I don't see the problem using "gonna" or "wanna" or even "you know." We say those words in every day conversations, and I've even seen some authors write them into their dialogue. Yeah, it's a spelling error but aren't books suppose to be as real as can be??

If you're writing contemporary fiction I think those are okay. Otherwise (say, in a fantasy or mainstream), probably good to stay away from alternative, casual spellings.

MMWyrm · Sep 19, 2007

MidnightMuse said:
Makes those love scenes even more enjoyable.

(back to thread)

Heck, how else will I know if the public finds the sex I write believable and stimulating? A circle gathers and....

ahem.

Can you see your dialogue....

^ Just Me & a Sharpie

Where's my tea, please...?

And thus we begin the edits

has finally arrived

Midnight Reading

The demon in your inkwell.

living in the past

Writing Anarchist

Stealthy Plot Bunny Peddler

Fear the Death Ray

Midnight Reading

THE BLUEBERRY QUEEN OF HADES (he/him)

AW Inmate #90976

Midnight Reading

Tortilla di Patate

Fear the Death Ray

Midnight Reading

Where are we going?

Fear the Death Ray

^ Just Me & a Sharpie

Fear the Death Ray