Interested in crazy/strange therapist advice

Not exactly weird, but a friend of mine went to a therapist for a while who told her she was just a bored house frau and needed to get a life. I thought that was a bit insensitive.

I was once told by a psychiatrist that having kids would cure my depression. (That was before I had kids, of course.)

Anyone who has kids knows they are a joy, but they certainly aren't a cure!

"Go home, look in the mirror, scream at yourself, then tell yourself you're beautiful, then take the mirror off of the wall, wrap it in ribbon or wrapping paper, and throw it into the river."

Needless to say, the people in the yacht were PISSED.

When I was a kid my parents were having issues so they went to a marriage counselor psychologist person. The psychologist talked to them for a while and then told them both "You're just too different. I recommend just getting it over with now and getting a divorce."

Which pissed my parents off royally and they have now been married for something like thirty five years.

So here's the question: Was the psychologist just a jerk... or did he REALIZE that my parents were both so freaking stubborn that they'd spend the rest of their lives together just to prove him wrong?

Yes.

Anti-anxiety medication to treat physical abuse. I refused to pay him, and he sued me. Wowsers.

Way to go, mental health!

JoNightshade said:

When I was a kid my parents were having issues so they went to a marriage counselor psychologist person. The psychologist talked to them for a while and then told them both "You're just too different. I recommend just getting it over with now and getting a divorce."

Which pissed my parents off royally and they have now been married for something like thirty five years.

So here's the question: Was the psychologist just a jerk... or did he REALIZE that my parents were both so freaking stubborn that they'd spend the rest of their lives together just to prove him wrong?

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The default answer, unfortunately, is that the psychologist is just a jerk. And when he's wrong, he's still a jerk.

Well, sometimes. I've had the fortune of being with two pretty darn good therapists. But I've seen the rotten ones out there. Psychiatrists are even worse--have been for me. They don't seem to be able to have a serious conversation with someone unless the other person is his/herself, also. What? Listen to the patient? How revolutionary!

insomnia

in my early thirties i was facing down a stressful job, a terminally ill parent, a disintegrating marriage. my husband and i were spending our nights arguing not sleeping. insomnia was the symptom that drove me to make an appointment with a mental health specialist. during the first visit the shrink suggested that i buy a new mattress before he prescribed anything to help me sleep. i coughed up the $ and my husband and i slept so soundly the night after it was delivered that we were both late to work the next morning. and we liked each other a lot more, too--s6

Years back, I had tried to kill myself. Parents sent me to a therapist shortly after. After my Tylenol-happy phase and my "welcome to the lunatic-bin for teens" phase, my parents decided to send me to a therapist(by now, I was in the "Fuck the world!" phase and really didn't give much of a damn about anything because, let's face it, most things don't matter after a near run-in with death).

The therapist insisted I talk for the entire hour. So, I spent 5 minutes telling him about myself, then couldn't think of anything more to say that would give him any clues to my state of mind (aren't therapists supposed to give insightful probing questions?), so I just randomly talked about anything, letting one thought drift into another. "Did I leave the coffee pot on? Starbucks is great. I used to write at coffee shops, mostly because it was where I spent most of my time. Then, I realized I could write in school and still pass all the tests. What's my third grade teacher's name, the one with the fake nails that are longer than Dracula's? God, I hate nail polish", etc.

After an entire hour of blabbering to myself as though he weren't there, he looked up at me and said, "You're not right in the head, missy." Then, I noticed that he had been scribbling the entire time I was talking- I assumed he was taking notes that made me seem worse than I really was. I asked to see the paper, and he obliged.

I must say, it was the best drawing of Auron from FFX that I had ever seen in my life.

These are hysterical - and scary, considering. My only experience was years ago. The thersapist wasn't interested in my problems, but just talked about her views and how thinking as she did would heal the world. (She was New Age, and kept pressuring me to go to some fair.) I went three times, but got too bored to continue on. I did get some background for writing, however.

forgot this one

it is so horrific that i put it out of my mind. the summer after my husband died--very unexpectedly, i went in for counseling. i was a two month widow who had been through a winter of hospital hell. i could not stop crying. this woman would barge into the appointment a minute late, gulping coffee, swishing crumbs off her garish paisley skirt, with my casefile under her arm. she would organize her desk while i was supposed to talk. \

my husband was named gill. an old welsh family name. she invariably called him "bill". i would correct her and she would do it again and again. this went on for almost five weeks. i live in a rural area so mental health counselors are assigned by alphabet and they must travel distances. you could see the travel was pissing her off. no way i could get another. so i just stood her up a couple of times. and i fought the billing and won. a wonder i didn't run her down on the way into the office. maybe i did. that whole summer is a blur--s6

Hubby and I were having sessions with a naturopathic doc for treatment of chronic pain and headaches after we got munched by a drunk driver. Hubby was deeply depressed during this period so the doc sprang for a couple of tickets to see this "unusually gifted psychologist" do her dog and pony show one Saturday afternoon.

The seminar was 5 hours of lightly tapping on various parts of your body in order to cause a miracle to happen. Alllll-righty then.

We didn't find any relief from the depression or the pain from this activity, but I did a pretty good impression of "Wipeout" on my husband's forehead.

One told me that I was Mary Poppins and that I think of myself "as pretty perfectly perfect." I was pissed.

shakeysix said:

during the first visit the shrink suggested that i buy a new mattress before he prescribed anything to help me sleep. i coughed up the $ and my husband and i slept so soundly the night after it was delivered that we were both late to work the next morning. and we liked each other a lot more, too--s6

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Yay shrink! Yes, honestly, some mental health problems would be a lot better with a hot bath and a good night's sleep. We bought a new mattress this past winter, which we refer to as our "Euro-poof" mattress because it has several inches of added poofiness on top of it, and we sleep--not like babies, since babies don't sleep that well--but like cats. Mmm.

Let's see...

About 20 years ago, I went to a therapist after a car accident. I was depressed. I had a baby. A husband who had lied to me about his age. (He was 24 years older than me, not the 10 years he had claimed. Yes, he looked great for his age!) My car was totaled and the woman who ran the red light and hit my car was the mother of a prominent doctor who refused to believe that his mother did anything wrong. The claim was being held up. I saw the threapist who told the insurance company that I needed private sessions twice a week and group therapy once a week - for a year. He added up what that would cost and sent his estimate to the insurance company. I asked him if I really needed all that therapy. His response? "Oh heck no. You just need to get this accident behind you and go on. I'm just trying to get the insurance company to pay up." They did, about 3 days after getting his estimate and I never saw the therapist after that.

Then there was one more recently. No matter what I said, his response was, "Quit being a victim." After the 3rd session like that, I went home and checked the internet about being a victim so I could ask him about it. His response? "It only took 3 weeks for you to start taking control of your life."

Or...I had one who shared all kinds of stories about other patients. She never did share names, but since most of her patients also suffered from fibromyalgia, I figured they might be in our fibro support group. If she talked about them, I figured she talked about me too. I quit going!

The "cutting" thread reminded me of some weird and dangerous advice from the American Psychriatric Association. Some years ago, I think c. 10, they had a press conference in which they announced having sex with children may not be a bad thing.

In the outcry afterwards, the group said that wasn't what they meant. The question is, did they announce it at a press conference because a) they believe it, or b) they're idiots and have no understanding of the psychology of the media, the masses and molesters? Which would you find more reassuring? And why didn't the protests come from their own organization before they announced it?

That's the problem with believing one has power over the minds of others. Dangerous territory... Hm. Stories there, I think.

JoNightshade said:

When I was a kid my parents were having issues so they went to a marriage counselor psychologist person. The psychologist talked to them for a while and then told them both "You're just too different. I recommend just getting it over with now and getting a divorce."

Which pissed my parents off royally and they have now been married for something like thirty five years.

So here's the question: Was the psychologist just a jerk... or did he REALIZE that my parents were both so freaking stubborn that they'd spend the rest of their lives together just to prove him wrong?

Click to expand...

-

The psychologist was not being a jerk, he probably did realize that they were stubborn. Sometimes hearing the exact opposite of what you're looking for is exactly what you need to hear. I am a therapist in training and will receive my master's degree in mental health counseling in 10 months. (Woohoo!)

Hope this helps!

Read my blog

www.skyravensays.blogspot.com

shakeysix said:

it is so horrific that i put it out of my mind. the summer after my husband died--very unexpectedly, i went in for counseling. i was a two month widow who had been through a winter of hospital hell. i could not stop crying. this woman would barge into the appointment a minute late, gulping coffee, swishing crumbs off her garish paisley skirt, with my casefile under her arm. she would organize her desk while i was supposed to talk. \

my husband was named gill. an old welsh family name. she invariably called him "bill". i would correct her and she would do it again and again. this went on for almost five weeks. i live in a rural area so mental health counselors are assigned by alphabet and they must travel distances. you could see the travel was pissing her off. no way i could get another. so i just stood her up a couple of times. and i fought the billing and won. a wonder i didn't run her down on the way into the office. maybe i did. that whole summer is a blur--s6

Click to expand...

I'm sorry that you got this therapist. One of the things I've been taught is that the client is most important and that we should act always in the best interest of the client. If you picked up that the travel was pissing her off, then she was a lousy therapist. The session should have only been about you and not her issues. I hope that these bad interactions with therapists have not caused you to think that they're all like that!

ps - my condolences.

one bad apple

no--my first therapist was so great that this bad experience was just that--an unpleasant isolated experience. my first guy was the one who told us to buy a new mattress before prescribing anything for insomnia. all practical sense and empathy. it was insensitivity on the second therapist's part that made me go so hostile. i would never begin a conference with a parent or student without first looking in the freaking grade folder! what gave her that right? arrogance and self absorption--s6

memories

I've had several wonderful therapists, but the ones that were bad, were horrible.

Experience 1: When I was 18, the first time I saw this particular therapist, I told him I thought my relationship with my father was causing some of my problems or something like that. The therapist said "I'll be the judge of that." Six months later, at our last session, he told me what my problem was. He quoted back to me exactly what I had said to him in the first session.

#2 I figured out that severe childhood abuse I'd experienced was causing a lot of my problems. I was referred to a therapist by someone in a support group. As I told her about my history, she kept exclaiming what an interesting case I was. I could practically see her composing the TV movie she planned to write about it. When I told her I would think about whether or not I was comfortable doing therapy with her, she was shocked and said "but I was recommended!."

#3 I was hospitalized when I went through a suicidal period. The psychiatrist insisted on walking ahead of me down the hall to show his higher status. Naturally, he used my first name, but expected me to call him Dr. Whatever-it-was. When I told him a bit about the childhood abuse I'd gone through, he asked why I thought it important in our therapy for him to believe what I said about what happened to me.

I, too, went through a suicidal period. I was about 13 and my parents sent me to a shrink. I hated it and didn't want to talk about my problems. At first I wouldn't talk. Then I'd fight with him. By this time I had become obsessed with pro sports. I went into one session and started talking about ice hockey. After that, we just talked sports until he dismissed me, never realizing how unhealthy my obsession was (I'd skip school when one of my teams lost).