suggestions please, because you guys are truly helpful

Having discussed my tendency to over write, I have a new problem, a mss that I could add 30K to and be well within the generally acceptable limits.

The background: finished draft five, finished the research and cross checked it without outside expert, the beta readers, including the outside expert love the novel. Put it in the drawer for several months.

The problem: Knowing there were two spots to fix, no big, got it out of the drawer. Re-read it and it is flat. Character development needs a little work, but ease enough to do. However that will not keep it from being flat. The mystery etc okay. But it is flat flat flat.

Possible cause: Long ago when some of you were an invitation to coffee from your father to your mother, I wrote in third person. Though published, my third person work tanked. Since then time and changing pov have improved my work. To my surprise I'm comfortable writing in first person, but I know it's pretty rare in the world of novels. My words aren't golden, but they flow better from first person. I'm querying on my strongest work to date, which is in first person.

This WIP is in third person. Is it possible that changing from first to third is making the mss seem flatter than it is? Is it possible that I haven't gotten comfortable with third and that is why the mss not only seems flat, but actually is flatter than it should be?

Since I'm not asking anyone to read it, if you were to read to answer this question you'd need to read both and I would not request that. Also, I find that if someone reads a mss before I consider, right or wrong, that I've got the next to final draft, the thing tanks right there in front of me. :\

Stlight

I honestly can't answer this with any assurance at all of being right.

The first questionn I'd ask, however, is are you sure it's flat? As writers, sometimes our own work seems flat, or just plain bad, even when it's exciting and good.

But if you feel more comofrotable writing in first person, I don't see any reason not to try converting it. You should know whether or not it works before you get too deep into the novel.

Why don't you pick a section that you see as flat (5 or 10 paragraphs) and put it on "share your work" specifying that you want to know if it seems flat?

This will give us a little more to go on.

Will do wwwatcher. Right now the whole book feels flat to me. I realize that is a large statement, but that's why I was thinking maybe the POV shift was the problem.

Stlight

When any part of my story is what I think of as "flat" it is because there is not enough tension. Any part of a story that does not have conflict must have the potential for conflict, or be building to conflict, to be fully effective.

Yeah, why don't you post a problem area to SYW and let us think on it? Without seeing your WIP, it's really difficult to offer any useful suggestions.

In general, there are many things to make a scene less flat: interesting character development and dialogue, dramatic ironies, small but significant events, foreshadowing, etc.

maestrowork, thanks, I did post a couple of pages and received excellent advice that let me clue into what was wrong - didn't get the underlying theme connection and there was rather a lot of chaos going on in just those pages. Having given it some thought, I now believe this was my subconscious resistance to changing my pov style from first to third. before asking for more opinions, I've taken the posting down to give it a try in both forms and see what happens. This doesn't mean I object to the opinions, it just means there is only so much I can literally work with at one time.

Stlight

I'm an avid reader, as well as writer, and the POV has no bearing on what novels I enjoy. It's the writer's style that attracts me or repells me. I like a fast moving, exciting story with well-developed characters, and if it's told in the first person or third person it makes little difference to me. I write in the third person, but that's what I'm most comfortable with. I agree that it's hard to tell what's going on unless we can see a sample of your writing. I do wish you lots of luck