Ha!
So, maybe I can just submit things under Q.Rious? I'm sure that will go over well. If they ask for my full first name, I'll say it's Quisling.
Jeanne, I think I'll do the opposite. So, what happens when (if?) they want to pay you? And do you maintain a separate e-mail account?
Love,
Quisling.
Well, I'm answering seriously (I know, I know, on the Humor thread and all).
You QUERY in your real name. No one, and I do mean NO ONE, wants to get something from N. Tegrity or Q. Rious. Editors and agents are busy, busy people. They've seen all the cutesy you can come up with, and then some, and thrown it ALL away. Without bothering to read the rest. Remember, agents and editors are LOOKING for reasons to REJECT you (because they are all overloaded with slush, that's why). Don't give them a reason to literally not even read your submission.
You query and submit using your real name. If you, like me, write in a large variety of genres (and I pretty much hit them ALL), then you need to have a list of pen names, and sort of assign them to your genres. You should already know the pen name you want to use when you query. I have my list, and I compare my genres to the names, to get a feel for what I feel works best to me, what I would feel comfortable "selling" myself as for this genre or sub-genre.
For most submissions these days I will put, along with my contact info, email address, phone numbers, etc., my byline (Byline: Ima Success). This tells the editors that they'll be promoting my story using my byline name, not my real name.
For novels you would query in your real name and then, once the agent offers representation and you accept it (as in, now you're a client), then you would discuss pen names with them. There are ways to show the agent you're writing under a pen name while submitting, but it's probably not the end of the world if this is discussed when you're a client. Most agents will want some input into your pen name, and if they're good ones, listen to them, since they have a better idea if your preferred pen name stinks on ice or not.
Also, if you're published in short horror as, for example, Stephen King, then you will want to probably keep Stephen King as your name for novel-length horror, since you would have, presumably, built up a following.
I would still tell you to avoid cutesy as your pen name (in fact, I'd come to your house and jump up and down screaming until you saw reason). No one's going to want to publish Q. Rious, unless it's a high school publication. Trust me, the college pubs are demanding as all get-out. I mean, think about it -- do you want to spend money reading something by Q. Rious? Other than in Mad Magazine? (NOT dissing Mad Magazine, but they are a single entity only, and hey, if they take you, that's awesome, they pay well, but you're not going to get a book deal out of it, most likely.)
You shouldn't be looking for a "funny name" for your humor. You should be looking for a name you're comfortable seeing in print and being referred to when you're on a book or speaking tour (yes, I'm serious). David Sedaris (real name) is a success and is all over the country doing readings. If you are that successful, then you will NOT want to be introduced in every town and hamlet as, "Mister Quisling Rious". It might sound funny the first time (might). By the 10th it'll be old to you and by the 100th you'll want to kill yourself.
Of course, if JAR or someone else equally published comes on and says, hogwash, Q. Rious is the way to go, listen to them. However, I don't think they're going to say that. This is a business -- look at the shelves for humor and see what the names are, and take your cue accordingly.
