Telling/Showing appropriateness

Nangleator · Apr 27, 2007

In my WIP, I start out with two characters and gradually add more. Later on in the novel, I have thousands of people in motion with my main characters among them.

I find myself describing things happening to groups of people who don't appear again in the story. I reread what I write and say to myself, "Telling!" The effect is almost like reading a news story about what happened to those people. Is this an appropriate use of telling, though?

In defense of the telling, I'm trying to get the point across of large groups of people struggling against each other without bogging the reader down with characters they won't see again. I could keep it intimate, but the epic nature of the larger struggle might disappear.

I wouldn't even ask my silly question, except because of the flow of the story, I don't use it in the beginning, but I use it more and more towards the end. (I don't use telling in the climax, of course.)

scarletpeaches · Apr 28, 2007

It can work, depending on the amount of people we're talking about. I noticed a certain amount of telling in Suite Francaise, in chapters where hundreds of people were on the move. Actually, thousands. The author dipped in and out of various people's heads and told us what they were thinking and doing to give us the right perspective, that this was happening all over France.

I'm told similar technique is used in other 'epics' like A Suitable Boy and War and Peace, but never having read them I can't say.

Kristin Landon · Apr 28, 2007

It seems like a good technique to me.

As a reader, I often find that some interesting "telling" that provides a lot of information quickly can be a nice relief between intense scenes written in intimate viewpoints.

Cav Guy · Apr 28, 2007

War and Peace does use a fair amount of this. Terry Johnston in his Plainsman series did as well, as did Del Vicchio in his Vietnam trilogy. I personally find it nice, as it does allow the author to impart a great deal of very useful information without bogging in expanses of dialog. For things with wide scope (which all these books share) I can't see how you'd do it otherwise without inducing suicide on your readers.

Judg · Apr 28, 2007

My mantra in this regard is: If telling is tedious, show it. If showing is tedious, tell it.

And if both are tedious, cut it.

DeadlyAccurate · Apr 28, 2007

There's nothing wrong with telling. It has its place just like everything else. To use a simple example, if the fact that the character woke up, showered, brushed her teeth, and got dressed was important to the story, you might actually describe the entirety of events. If not, you'd probably say something like, "She woke up and got ready for work."

Showing is saying to the reader, "It's really important you know everything that's going on right now." Telling is letting the reader know, "You just need the highlights of these events." If you were writing a long combat scene, you might describe the first and last ones in detail and quickly summarize the rest of them.

I don't know if your particular scenario works as telling, but on the surface it sounds like a good use of it.

Nangleator · Apr 28, 2007

Thank you all, for confirming what I had hoped. You have saved thousands of words, and saved me from having to type many thousands more.

Big scope was what I was going for. Big scope without losing focus on the main characters.

Diviner · Apr 28, 2007

In Tolstoy's War and Peace, the huge battle scenes are humanized by Pierre's involvement in them. The same thing happens in The Red and the Black, Stendhal's masterpiece. The scope and tragedy of a disaster can best be dramatized by a telling scene, a personal loss within the mega event.

I am the last person to object to telling, but make sure the vividness is brought home. Yesterday, I had to expand fifty words of telling into 500+ words of showing. The change is essential and adds immeasurably to the impact of the loss.

BlueBadger · Apr 28, 2007

This topic interests me. I recently put up a sample of my novel in SYW (cough cough plug) wherein I purposefully used telling instead of showing. I recieved a critque telling me I shouldn't do as much.

I wouldn't mind some clarification. I'm not sure if my attempt fails simply because I did tell, or if it falls short because of my presentation. I can understand the latter, but I don't think telling should automatically be ditched.

Nangleator · Apr 28, 2007

Well, it would definitely be hard to judge how much is too much telling without reading the whole work, and seeing the balance. In my case, I felt it was necessary to give the reader the big picture without too my effort on their part.

Rob B · Apr 28, 2007

If at all, I think a writer may get away with it better in scenes, rather than with specific characters the reader might develop an interest in.

Several mentioned WAR AND PEACE, and my issue with this great story has always been that the fate of a principle early character, Anatol, was never resolved. He fell off the end of the earth. But a lot of the greats have been guilty of "mistreating" their characters in this manner: Hardy never added closure to Captain Vye; in contemporary literature, Roth didn't develop the dead Realtor thread in AMERICAN PASTORAL. Yet all of these works were strong enough for the reader to ignore these "gaps" as story killers.

One thought: With agents and editors trying to find any reason to pitch a work, I think it might be best to avoid these voids. (How's that for all-world crappy alliteration? And I'm trying to give advice. Ignore me. I'm an idiot.)

the_Unknown · Apr 28, 2007

Nangleator said:
In my WIP, I start out with two characters and gradually add more. Later on in the novel, I have thousands of people in motion with my main characters among them.

I find myself describing things happening to groups of people who don't appear again in the story. I reread what I write and say to myself, "Telling!" The effect is almost like reading a news story about what happened to those people. Is this an appropriate use of telling, though?

In defense of the telling, I'm trying to get the point across of large groups of people struggling against each other without bogging the reader down with characters they won't see again. I could keep it intimate, but the epic nature of the larger struggle might disappear.

I wouldn't even ask my silly question, except because of the flow of the story, I don't use it in the beginning, but I use it more and more towards the end. (I don't use telling in the climax, of course.)

Post an example in the SYW section - I'm not a mind reader.

Generally if you're going to do some telling, you do it with your characters because dialog is much more powerful/interesting and it gives you the opportunity to have them emote and react.

Raphee · Apr 30, 2007

I don't mind reading telling. As long as it is written well and fits the story.

Telling/Showing appropriateness

Nangleator

Rep Point Whore

scarletpeaches

Kristin Landon

Cav Guy

Living in the backstory

Judg

DISENCHANTED coming soon

DeadlyAccurate

Absolutely Fazed

Nangleator

Rep Point Whore

Diviner

BlueBadger

Knows notebooks can kill.

Nangleator

Rep Point Whore

Rob B

the_Unknown

Drinking your story's blood...

Raphee

In debt to AW