Reasons for sex scenes

Hmm... Interesting topic.

I have 3 in my book (might take out the second one as it doesn't seem as necessary as I thought at first) The reason my scenes are there (besides the emotional connection these characters share) is because one isn't human. During the first scene (her first time) we see how she thinks of her body, how she tries to cover it up and stuff of this nature but as time progresses (within the scene) she becomes more comfortable with the main character's attentions and eventually relaxes into what (I think) becomes a quite beautiful scene, and a major character moment oddly enough (Her acceptance, finally, of what she is. That she isn't some kind of thing and to some extent opens her up to more of the main character's attentions.)

In the second scene it's something of a mutual affirmation of their feelings toward one another after having gone through some extremely grueling trials (Baptisim by fire) Where they could have lost one another and almost did.

The third and final one comes shortly after about a month of being apart from each other (her personal beliefs on what she should be able to do as a 'woman' {she wants a family} and everything tellign her that she can't have those things. {Like not being able to have children. and with the situation what it is, it wouldn't be practical}) But the real sinch is when they both find out that she will live longer than the main character by hundreds of years. . . It's really quite sad actually

Alternatively one of them that DIDN'T make it involved the antagonist (who is also like the woman above) making love to a woman that tries to get him to open up and let her in (she works for him) As much sense as it might make to have it in, I somehow don't see what would be gained except seeing more of the 'unfamiliar' physical attributes of these people. Though if you've already seen certain things on one character, does it really need to be repeated just because that person happens to be of the opposite gender? hehe. . .

[/rambling]

I always have cut the scene when it reaches sex. I believe it is important when the characters are a) losing virginity and it's essential to the story or b) it is to further the story

I bring it right up to the moment, then cut out. None of my stories would benefit from having the actual sex scene, it's enough to let people know where their relationship is at.

I guess I haven't found reason enough to include one. I have an almost sex scene in my current WIP, but the male MC falls asleep just as the woman disrobes and climbs into bed with him. Well, I'm sure you'd be tired too if you haven't had much sleep for 5 days battling some demon.

My first novel has a semi sex scene in it -- it has a specific purpose and the show vs. tell specifically illustrates the mental state of the protagonist. It moves the plot along and shows a seedy side of the protagonist, then at the end, there's a twist and the plot continues.

In my WIP, I am consider a scene later in the story. I'm thinking it will be very psychological and probably weird to show exactly how these two people are at two different emotional places but belong to each other at the same time. I haven't figured the scene out yet.

Just because it fits really. There's times where a close the screen (so to speak) and times when it's wide open because that's what fits the read of the story.

Sex scene

Sex scenes are rarely necessary. There are far, far, far too many novels without them to say otherwise.

The reasons to put in sex scenes are because you want to, and because you think it makes the novel better.

Because real people have sex is not a reason to include sex scenes, at least with the curtains opened. Real people have bowels movements, hemorrhoids, etc. Real people masturbate, etc. But unless a scene is relevant to the story, makes the story better, moves it forward, there's no reason to have it with the curtains open.

And, honestly, most writers couldn't write a good sex scene on a bet. Nothing is worse than a supposedly serious sex scene that makes the reader laugh.

Same criteria as for any other scene: does it advance the plot and/or show character growth/change?

JD

I've only written one sex scene. I put it in (steady!) to show the female MC finally losing control.

I'm in agreement with JAR. They're rarely necessary. The one I wrote may end up being cut, or toned down. But I feel that I need it. I may work out another way to show the growth of the MC, but I think this is the only way it can be done. Or at least, the best way. Just have to make sure it's written well, as the whole book must be written well.

What Jan said. Will a reader learn something about the characters, or their relationship, or the story, specifically as a result of having seen them intimately? If yes, I put it in. If not, it's enough for me, as both writer and a reader, in a genre that's not specifically erotic, to know intent.

Robert Masello in 'Bestiary' has a sex scene where one learns that a couple who are obviously happy otherwise are having issues in the bedroom; the scenework -- which is neither too much nor too little detail -- is much more effective than 'we're having problems in the bedroom' would have been in a character exposition. That sort of thing works.

Another reason: because sex-writing is a genre with its own audience ready and willing to part with their cash.

veinglory said:

Another reason: because sex-writing is a genre with its own audience ready and willing to part with their cash.

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Not sure guys with overcoats sneaking out of bookstores that have blacked out windows is my kind of audience though.

*runs away before he gets hit*

Sex scenes just for the sake of sex are rarely necessary. Quite frankly, most are boring and I usually skip-read them. I use two sex scenes in one novel to display an aspect of the two male characters' personalities. But I don't go into lurid details.

Shadow_Ferret said:

Not sure guys with overcoats sneaking out of bookstores that have blacked out windows is my kind of audience though.

*runs away before he gets hit*

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They have the best candy...


(forget I said that)

Apart from certain genres, sex for sex's sake is boring. When I see a story arc where the boy bickers with the girl, then they make up and realize how much they love each other, then they make love, then they wake up all refreshed and happy -- I wonder, why am I reading this? The sex scene is so boring and unnecessary that I'd rather go brush my teeth.

But if a scene is pivotal to the plot and character development, it can be very powerful. Sex can be a powerful experience and if you do it right in the right context, it can have a great impact on your readers.

That said, sex is very difficult to do well. Many people simply do not know how to write about sex -- even seasoned writers. That's probably one reason why people don't like to read sex scenes -- many of them are just badly written.

A poorly written sex scene is boring. A well-written sex scene ... not so much. The level of "lurid" detail to include will in many ways depend on the audience.

But as it's been said many times before, a sex scene needs conflict and character growth/revelation like any other scene. Unless there is something at stake for the characters, it's just a scene that is going through the motions for the sake of titillation (not that there's anything wrong with that, either - it all has its place).

I think I posted this link in a thread like this last year, but I'll do it again in case anyone's interested:

Rosina Lippi has a great series of blog entries on writing good sex scenes. There's somehting of a literary bent to them, but they're excellent and the advice applies regardless.

This book is good, too.

Both of these focus on conflict and characterization instead of steamy purple prose.

Unless you're writing in romantica or erotica, and then you'd better have sex scenes, and they had better be good.

But they also need to advance the plot and/or characterizations.

I feel the same way about sex scenes as I do about fight scenes, talking scenes, descriptive scenes and any other scenes -- if they move your plot and/or characterizations along, if they need to be there to show the reader something important, then keep them in. If they don't, then take them out.

Personal experience note -- I find it easier to put a full on sex scene in later, if I'm asked to, than to pull a full on sex scene out if I'm asked to. So now, unless I'm writing in romantica or erotica, I just do the lead up and the aftermath and leave out the details (barring the details being necessary, which they sometimes are).

I use the before and after approach, or a very brief (one or two sentence) description of the act itself.

In the three novels I've written there are two sex scenes in total. The first involved a non-POV character so it was a before and after. The POV character's sister was paid for sex, something that affected both of them. The other scene was a two sentence description, and showed how one character had been ground down to the point where she'd participate in a humiliating act without resisting.

Like the OP, an important character is conceived. But more importantly, it's the climax (so to speak) of a long, emotional roller coaster between the two characters. The emotions expressed and experienced during the act are vital to their development as individuals, and as a couple.

Also, in the beginning the woman witnesses a rape by the man she's about to marry. That scene is important because it shows just how cruel the man is. Her later scene with the lover mentioned above shows what a difference her lover is from her would-have-been husband. Considering she was afraid of her now-lover at one point, that's important.

My novels tend to have sex scenes without the sex if that makes any sense. You can tell that the characters did the deed without giving the audience a stroke by stroke narration of the event. The fact that these two characters are moving into a sexual relationship advances the plot, but a little hint and soft touch is enough to convey this. The audience can imagine encouters which are much steamier than anything I could write.

Unfortunately I have and do use sex scenes. Its part of the genre I write and honestly of all the books i've read in the area i write I've not seen one without one. Now that's not to say if i don't feel it's needed for the development of the characters and/or story I won't use it. Case in point my current WIP is a fantasy/romance but i can't see it having a sex scene in it. Now there is tons of sexual tension etc. but that to me is generally alot more fun anyway.

maestrowork said:

My first novel has a semi sex scene in it .

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Is semi sex the kind that makes you go blind?

On a serious note, I'll go with the crowd. Sex scenes can be useful tools to add to a story. If they can't be used as such, it may be better to skip them. I'll also second what James said about bad sex scenes being humorous, but add that the same can be said of a bad scenes of violence, of battle, of tension, or horror, of non-sexual tenderness, and on and on. Even in the Erotica genre, sex shouldn't be the centerpiece (in my opinion). There has to be a story there, and there has to be solid characterization, or the sex will be little more than creaking bedsprings.

NeuroFizz said:

Is semi sex the kind that makes you go blind?

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No, just near-sighted.

I have some sex scenes in my novels. Some are descriptive, some skip over everything after the foreplay, some just hint that there was sex involved. It all depends on context and what I'm trying to say about the characters.

The first one occurs when the hero goes to a brothel to gain information on who's been passing through the town and figures the local brothel would have great information, and he's horny. He's been traveling with the heroine for some months, hasn't had sex in about a year or more, and he and the heroine aren't romantically involved yet. He figures a pro is an easy way to kill two birds with one stone (and there are actually, two females involved). I get the women undressed then cut to him leaving.

The next one involves him receiving ... something from one of the maids in his friend's house. I kept it because while she's doing her business, he imagines the heroine and whispers her name when he reaches the finish line. They have neither acknowledged their feelings for each other at this point.

When he and the heroine get together, it's in there and it's part of the marriage ceremony wherein they become one heart, one mind, one soul, as is the nature of the marriage in my romance/fantasy world.

I think that's about it. I debated keeping the scenes in but they each said something about a character or the plot so I left them. In other books, I've gone through the entire romance without there being any sex.