Is this Un-PC?

kikazaru · Jan 17, 2007

I wrote a children's story quite a few years ago, and I thought that I might take it out, give it a polish and send it off. However, two of the secondary characters are old ladies who are hard of hearing and much of the humour comes from them not understanding what's said, and then responding to what they think they've heard.

While I like the story very much, it suddenly occured to me that it might cause offense.

So I am wondering, is it offensive?

Vincent · Jan 17, 2007

Afraid you're a bit ageist?

Mothra · Jan 17, 2007

I'm not an old lady, but I am hearing impaired. Humor that revolves around a person that is hearing impaired not understanding what is being said to him or her makes me uncomfortable. In real life, this is rarely a funny thing. It is frustrating when this happens to me, and when people laugh because I've said something inappropriate in the context of the conversation because I did not hear what they said correctly I want to disappear. It is very embarrassing.

That said, I don't think the scenario you describe would be patently offensive given that both of the characters are hard of hearing, as long as hard of hearing doesn't equate to dumb. It isn't something that I would likely find funny, but I'm sure lots of people would. I'm interested in seeing what non-hearing impaired people have to say about this topic.

kikazaru · Jan 17, 2007

No not an ageist beezle, but doing something to hurt someone's feelings as said in Mothras post.

That is what I am afraid of Mothra. They are eccentric characters so perhaps I could have them have a fondness for ear muffs or hats with ear flaps?

Thank you both for your response.

Mothra · Jan 17, 2007

They are eccentric characters so perhaps I could have them have a fondness for ear muffs or hats with ear flaps?

I like that a lot better. It's funny, too.

kikazaru · Jan 17, 2007

Thank you Mothra I think that it works very well too. They could be slaves to fashion and this is what's "in" - or so they think.

As an aside, I was sitting behind my FIL (a sweet lovely man) at a concert held at his church. I think that he was expecting some pleasant choir music instead of what was presented - a very loud rock band. I watched him paste a pleasant smile on his face and calmly reach into his pockets and remove a couple of peanuts in the shell that he kept on hand to feed the chipmunks - and then place one in each ear. Cracked me up!

Jamesaritchie · Jan 17, 2007

Humor

There's humor in almost everything, and most of those I know who are hearing impaired tell the most jokes about it.

I've always believed PC really stands for Pure Crap.

There's a difference between being mean and finding the humor in a situation.

When you start worrying about offending people, you've already lost the battle.

Elektra · Jan 17, 2007

Jamesaritchie said:
There's humor in almost everything, and most of those I know who are hearing impaired tell the most jokes about it.

I've always believed PC really stands for Pure Crap.

There's a difference between being mean and finding the humor in a situation.

When you start worrying about offending people, you've already lost the battle.

Hear, hear!

kikazaru · Jan 17, 2007

I agree James that some PC is really over the top, but I really do try not to offend or hurt people if I can help it. I would like the story to appeal to everyone (not possible I know) and I think that a publisher might not care to publish something that has the potential for offense - especially since there are children who do have hearing problems.

"There's a difference between being mean and finding the humor in a situation."

This is very true, and I don't believe that it would come across as mean, but I think that I may like their problem to be fashion induced, just because it adds more humour.

Pamster · Jan 17, 2007

Mothra said:
I like that a lot better. It's funny, too.

I agree and like this better too, thirty years ago it would have been fine to see something like that because it wasn't as well understood that disabilities don't do humor well. Not at the expense of a person or set of people. :Shrug:

Changing it to the earmuffs sounds a lot more interesting to be honest.

Mothra · Jan 17, 2007

Jamesaritchie said:
There's humor in almost everything, and most of those I know who are hearing impaired tell the most jokes about it.

I've always believed PC really stands for Pure Crap.

There's a difference between being mean and finding the humor in a situation.

When you start worrying about offending people, you've already lost the battle.

Well, I'll have to remind myself to consult you the next time I need help deciding whether or not something makes me uncomfortable.

kikazaru · Jan 17, 2007

I didn't write it 30 years ago, but a good 20 for sure. I put it away (after being rejected a few times) and just dug it out again the other day. Maybe some reworking (and ear muffs) would be just what it needs.

Silver King · Jan 17, 2007

There's hardly anything that can be said, or written, without insulting someone, somewhere. Whether the subject matter deals with the hearing impaired or any other type of real or perceived imparity, you are guaranteed to raise someone's rankles somewhere.

The only way to ensure you don't offend anyone is to stop writing altogether.

Jamesaritchie · Jan 18, 2007

Mothra said:
Well, I'll have to remind myself to consult you the next time I need help deciding whether or not something makes me uncomfortable.

Nope. Whether something makes you uncomfortable, me uncomfortable, or anyone else uncomfortable has no bearing at all on whether a writer should write it. You're allowed to feel uncorfortable, yu just aren't allowed to say something shouldn't be written because it makes you uncomfortable. Not everyone who's hearing impaired feels the same way you do, and it wouldn't matter if they did.

If something makes you uncomfortable, just don't read it, but don't say it shouldn't be written.

No one has the right to be comfortable, no one has the right not to feel offended, and no one has the right to say what should or shouldn't be written.

As my grandpappy said, "Even sugar offends some people."

Pamster · Jan 18, 2007

I think that might hold true for the remaining bulk of writing James, but not when you're talking about children's stories which is what the OP of this thread was asking about. You're also not right about this:

No one has the right to be comfortable, no one has the right not to feel offended, and no one has the right to say what should or shouldn't be written.

I think that we all have the right to not be comfortable or to be offended, it's called forming an opinion. We all have the right to that, don't discount our importance as an audience by only seeing it from the writer's side of the coin.

Toothpaste · Jan 18, 2007

I have to agree with James on this one, even for children's books. I do think you have to take your audience into account, but you always are in any genre. If it is a gritty realistic mystery, then you don't have fairies flying around. If it is a middle grade novel, you don't tend to swear in it. But to be honest, I mock a hell of a lot of people in my book and I don't think this is a problem. Alice in Wonderland was practically political satire, and let's not forget that Mr. Darling in Peter Pan felt so bad about being mean to his kids and Nana that he slept in the dog house. I am sure some strict fathers would dissaprove of that.

Pamster · Jan 18, 2007

Well as they say we're each entitled to our own opinions, and I would not want my son reading about disturbing things that can be found a dime a dozen in YA or other genres. Not going to get into details about what distubing might mean to me since it's a subjective concept. But I agree with you about the Fairies not being appropriate to Realistic Mysteries. And that you don't swear in Middle Grade books.

If it is a gritty realistic mystery, then you don't have fairies flying around. If it is a middle grade novel, you don't tend to swear in it.

Celia Cyanide · Jan 18, 2007

Jamesaritchie said:
Nope. Whether something makes you uncomfortable, me uncomfortable, or anyone else uncomfortable has no bearing at all on whether a writer should write it.

It does matter if the writer actually cares about such things. The writer does not have to care. But some do.

The OP was saying that she doesn't want to hurt anyone's feelings or make anyone uncomfortable. If she knows in advance that it might hurt someone's feelings, she probably won't write it that way, because that is not what she wants to do. If she doesn't care, she probably still will.

We cannot be the ones who decide what she should or should not care about. Only she can.

kikazaru, I agree with everyone else that earmuffs is more interesting anyway. I think children would respond to it better because they could see it.

dahmnait · Jan 19, 2007

kikazaru said:
I think that I may like their problem to be fashion induced, just because it adds more humour.

It also adds the value that if you ever wanted to use them again, the fashion can change.

Dark glasses are all the rage with the stars, problem is, the two ladies can't see a thing.

Pamster · Jan 19, 2007

dahmnait said:
It also adds the value that if you ever wanted to use them again, the fashion can change.

Dark glasses are all the rage with the stars, problem is, the two ladies can't see a thing.

That's like the car windows tinted too dark and driving in one at night. I can see a lot of humor in that scenario.

Layla Nahar · Feb 17, 2007

I like the earmuffs idea - you get the same jokes, and poking fun at people for thier silliness, which is something they can change

I think it was very thoughtful of the OP to ask - and great to have someone who can speak from experience to give us thier feedback.

Gina_Ritter · Feb 26, 2007

Someone is ALWAYs going to have a problem with it! Just write a great story and let the editor tell you if s/he wants to remove the ladies.

Just like I am going to keep the bit about Grandpa Tim losing whole rows of teeth at the dinner table all the time and Dad says it's because he forgets to use denture glue. "It's an age thing," one of my characters says.

It's staying until I've been told otherwise by someone that might buy the manuscript.

Is this Un-PC?

kikazaru

Benefactor Member

Vincent

Cheers

Mothra

kikazaru

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Mothra

kikazaru

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Jamesaritchie

Elektra

Don't Call Me Sweetheart

kikazaru

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Pamster

Counting Stars

Mothra

kikazaru

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Silver King

Megalops Erectus

Jamesaritchie

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Toothpaste

THE RECKLESS RESCUE is out now!

Pamster

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Celia Cyanide

Joker Groupie

dahmnait

Just a figment…

Pamster

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Layla Nahar

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Gina_Ritter

Into the fray with a giggle