Paid Humor Markets

JeanneTGC · Nov 27, 2006

Is there another resource for humor markets that are paying, other than the NSSW? Unlike many of you, I haven't been published yet and I don't have a column, so I'm trying to find places to send my humorous essays. I would prefer to try the paying markets before I go for the free ones, unless there's some great reason to go free first (other than maybe more likely to take from an unknown).

SherryTex · Nov 28, 2006

Free markets often lead to paying markets so do both.

1) most of us don't have columns, we submit stuff and the editor agrees to take it.

2) read the papers and magazines and look to see what's in there --then ask yourself, can I write that? Can I write better than that? Do the research on how to submit for that publication --look in the contact us section and submission requirements and writer submissions --usually burried in the business section of the web site of the periodical or newspaper

3) submit locally first, save your very best for big fish but submit.

4) Determine which places your pieces fit best --magazine, newspaper, periodical

5) Guest columns in the newspaper are free. Most smaller papers don't have a budget for free lance unsolicited stuff, but it looks good on the resume. I have submitted and had two freebie columms in my hometown paper just to keep me writing.

Other than that, look in the paying markets of AW, and at the bio lines of people in the humor section, and look in goals and announcements -- at where other people have had success. Then PM them and ask how they got published.

Good luck.

RainbowDragon · Nov 29, 2006

Don't overlook the "Low-paying" markets. They help build credits without giving your work away. AW is one of those, and accepts humor submissions. Maybe write something for them, then start submitting to the New Yorker (let us know if you get in!)

JeanneTGC · Nov 29, 2006

Ahead of you on the New Yorker. I have a lovely collection of polite email passes from them. You can only send twice in a year...so I can't send again to them until January. LOL!

I am all for low-paying, just hoping to go for "paying" first before I go for "free but out there". Partially because Uncle Jim strongly says that you should. Partially because I don't write only humor and if I'm going to use it as a credit for my novels and/or short stories, being paid for it will carry a lot more weight (at least, so I've been told, but who knows?).

What other low-paying markets are out there? And, does 2 copies of the issue actually count as payment in the agent court of law?

kikazaru · Nov 29, 2006

Do you have access to Writers Market? Every once in a while I will borrow it from the library to scope out markets (also available on line). I also subscribe to a free writer's newsletter "Writing for Dollars" that comes out a couple of times a month and is emailed - it has markets in it as well for various genres and they are broken up into low, med and high paying for the writer.

JeanneTGC · Nov 29, 2006

Yeah, that's the NSSW I was referring to (Novel & Short Story Writer's Market from Writer's Digest Books). Writing for Dollars, though, I have never seen. Where would I go to sign up for that?

And the reason I'm asking about what else might be out there outside of the NSSW is that I found many more agents to send novel queries to based on coming to this site than were listed in the NSSW, so I have to assume there are more pubs out there than the NSSW is listing, too.

SherryTex · Nov 29, 2006

Excuse me, I have to go submit to the NewYorker now...some of those places are funny like that, Washington Post only takes every three months.

kikazaru · Nov 30, 2006

Here's the web address Jeanne.

http://www.writingfordollars.com/

JeanneTGC · Nov 30, 2006

Thanks much, Kikazaru!

RainbowDragon · Dec 3, 2006

Don't the New Yorker's rejection letters just brighten your day, though? Phrases like "evident merit" don't even feel like a form. . .

I'm in limbo until January too, having used up my 2 tries this year as well

But I enter the cartoon contest every week (no luck there, either).

JeanneTGC · Dec 3, 2006

RainbowDragon said:
Don't the New Yorker's rejection letters just brighten your day, though? Phrases like "evident merit" don't even feel like a form. . .

I'm in limbo until January too, having used up my 2 tries this year as well
But I enter the cartoon contest every week (no luck there, either).

Can't draw well enough to try for rejections there

. And, yeah, their email rejections make you feel okay. At least I can tell myself they read it and didn't want it for a legitimate reasone (I make up those reasons, but, hey, whatever keeps me going, right? LOL)

My first rejection, ever, was from the New Yorker. I turned to my husband and said, "I am now, officially, in the same league as Robert Benchley, Woody Allen and Steve Martin." (All of whom have been rejected by the New Yorker at one time or another.)

aka eraser · Dec 3, 2006

There are thousands of mags and newspapers which accept humour in one form or another and will pay for it. Writer's Market is a fine place to start looking and Googling - "humor" "writer's guidelines" - will keep you bookmarking for a goodly while.

Good luck.

JeanneTGC · Dec 3, 2006

aka eraser said:
There are thousands of mags and newspapers which accept humour in one form or another and will pay for it. Writer's Market is a fine place to start looking and Googling - "humor" "writer's guidelines" - will keep you bookmarking for a goodly while.

It's the simple things you treasure.

This is why I ask these questions. It never occurred to me to try Googling that way for this market. I'm used to Googling agents, but not magazines. Thank you VERY much, Eraser, for this suggestion.

Off to Google my little heart out!

wyntermoon · Dec 3, 2006

I'm a googlin' fool tonight, thanks eraser!

RainbowDragon · Dec 4, 2006

Oops should have specified - the cartoon caption contest.
http://www.newyorker.com/captioncontest/
No drawing required, you just come up with a caption for the cartoon image provided. They let you enter every week

Don't expect to be in the top three, but if it happens, run with it.

JennaGlatzer · Dec 4, 2006

Jeanne, the Novel and Short Story Writer's Market won't be as helpful for humor essays as the regular ole' Writer's Market.

But there are many, many mags that have one humor essay (often the back page) per issue. Family Circle was the one I kept trying to break into (and someday I'll succeed, swear!). Barb (batyler65) had several of her essays published there, and they're fantastic.

A few random markets you might like:

The Imperfect Parent (pays $15 for humor): http://www.imperfectparent.com/submit/index.php

Breath & Shadow (only for people with disabilities; pays $5-25): http://abilitymaine.org/breath/write.html

The Christian Science Monitor (seeks "gentle" humor for The Home Forum; pays $75-160): http://www.csmonitor.com/aboutus/guidelines.html

Travelwise (seeks humor about travel): http://www.ralan.com/humor/listings/travelwi.htm

Absolute Write (

pays $5 for writing-related humor): http://www.absolutewrite.com/site/submissions.htm

The Wittenburg Door (religious satire): http://www.wittenburgdoor.com/wguidelines.html

Parents' Press (San Francisco parenting mag; says they're usually overstocked on humor, but they pay $25-500): http://www.parentspress.com/editguide.html

MAD Magazine (Pays $500/page): http://www.dccomics.com/mad/?action=submissions

Field & Stream (accepts outdoor-related humor; pays high rates): http://www.fieldandstream.com/fieldstream/include/article/0,13373,faqs,00.html

Breakaway (Christian magazine for teenage boys; pays $.12-.15/word): http://www.breakawaymag.com/writersguidelines.cfm

Air & Space (wants humor about flying; pays top rates): http://www.airspacemag.com/contact-us/department-descriptions.php

More later, if I get a chance.

JeanneTGC · Dec 4, 2006

Wow, Jenna, thank you SO MUCH!

RGame · Dec 4, 2006

I just got my second "evident merit" rejection of the year. I'm an idiot, but I actually thought this one had a chance (an incredibly small one, of course). Anyway, it's already off to Salon.com for another, not so incredibly small but still small chance.

JeanneTGC · Dec 4, 2006

RGame said:
I just got my second "evident merit" rejection of the year. I'm an idiot, but I actually thought this one had a chance (an incredibly small one, of course). Anyway, it's already off to Salon.com for another, not so incredibly small but still small chance.

I'm sure it's good, RG! Just keep on sending it, you'll find the right source for it. And, good luck with Salon.com!

RGame · Dec 4, 2006

Thanks. Good luck with your ear canals.

draculeen · Dec 4, 2006

My first rejection, ever, was from the New Yorker. I turned to my husband and said, "I am now, officially, in the same league as Robert Benchley, Woody Allen and Steve Martin." (All of whom have been rejected by the New Yorker at one time or another.)

my first rejection also came from the New Yorker lol and my reaction was along the same lines as yours...

wyntermoon · Dec 4, 2006

JennaGlatzer said:
The Imperfect Parent (pays $15 for humor): http://www.imperfectparent.com/submit/index.php

I was at IP the other night, their Angry Baby column is a scream!

kikazaru · Dec 5, 2006

Well bummer. I've got 2 captions for this weeks cartoon in the NYer and you have to be a US citizen.

Dollywagon · Dec 5, 2006

Do you have to be a US citizen to submit to the New Yorker for any of the other departments?

By the way, I know my ignorance is showing, but I've browsed their guidelines loads of times and never realised they accepted humor

JeanneTGC · Dec 5, 2006

Dollywagon said:
Do you have to be a US citizen to submit to the New Yorker for any of the other departments?

By the way, I know my ignorance is showing, but I've browsed their guidelines loads of times and never realised they accepted humor

Well, they print it, so that means they accept it. By squeezing my eyes really tight and pressing my fingers to my temples and concentrating with all I've got, I think I remember that I sent humor to the Fiction editor, as that seemed the best option to me at the time.

I'd just go onto the site, see which of the sections taking submissions seems the most likely to you and send away. You lose nothing in the sending, and who knows, they may take it!

No idea about the citizenship thing, since I'm in the U.S., sorry.

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