NEED HELP PLEASE.

kitt

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I am writing a romedy, and i want to do a series of shots to show the passage of time. More aptly put falling in love over the passage of time, not to long, maybe a few weeks. This scene comes right before the big reversal so I really want to make it good. I just don't want cliche scenes. I've done pretty good avoiding them so far, but I don't know if my creative juices are down or what. All I can think of are the usual kissing, laughing, blah blah blah predictible scenes. IT"S DRIVING ME CRAZY. The scenes can't envolve other people, they are isolated so to speak. Any ideas or even a point in the right direction would be greatly appreciated.
 

icerose

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Look up Montage, it might be what you are looking for and more than a few threads cover it around here.
 

wordmonkey

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Go for especially NON romantic scenes.

Being close and open is more important than being "romantic."

Disney's Beauty & the Beast kinda does this. The chance to see someone and be seen by someone at our most vulnerable offers the potential for a deep connection.
 

kitt

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I got series of shots mixed up with montage...too much turkey, but thats what i meant. Maybe romantic was a poor choice of word, I just need ideas on how to convey deep bond being formed, letting down your guard, and showing character and quirks. I know people have mixed feelings about the movie "The Notebook" ( I loved it), they use a montage device in that script, the icecream in the face, teaching her how to drive, swinging from the rope into the lake, yada yada, not exactly romantic scenes but they show the two bonding. I'm racking my brain for scenes like that. I could skip over it and come back to it later when my brain isn't convulsing over it. I don't know, I'm frusterated.
 

Badboy

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Start off the montage with the couple doing normal, early-dating things, like going to dinner, movies, ect. and gradually build their comfort levels by having them become more...laxed with eachother: doing things like walking the dog, or answering eachother's phone, or sitting in bed reading.

in my opinion, the best way to convey love on screen is with the eyes. you know that look a woman gives you when she is falling in love... the eyes just say, "who is this guy? I'm completely swept up in his current and I'm loving every second of it." God I love that look. that's how it should end.

and the music should be that song that goes, "tiiiiiiime is on our siide, yes it is."
 

mommyjo2

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What if one person gets sick, and the other one shows up with fried chicken and macaroni, since they don't like chicken noodle soup, so they brought chicken and noodles... the kinds of scenes where one partner doesn't get it quite right, but it charms the other one.
Like "Shrek", they bond over rats and snakes.

Just be careful you write a Romedy and not a Comatic.
 

Goodwriterguy

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kitt said:
I am writing a romedy, and i want to do a series of shots to show the passage of time. More aptly put falling in love over the passage of time, not to long, maybe a few weeks. This scene comes right before the big reversal so I really want to make it good. I just don't want cliche scenes. I've done pretty good avoiding them so far, but I don't know if my creative juices are down or what. All I can think of are the usual kissing, laughing, blah blah blah predictible scenes. IT"S DRIVING ME CRAZY. The scenes can't envolve other people, they are isolated so to speak. Any ideas or even a point in the right direction would be greatly appreciated.
We've all seen this kind of sequence so many times it does indeed become difficult to write one and make it original, and original is most assuredly what you need. It absoloutely cannot be anything we've ever seen or even a version of what we've seen.

This makes it a rather supreme challenge.

Calling for a MONTAGE and then describing it is challenging for this kind of sequence too because in its simpler form anyway, you only get a paragraph to describe the action. You can, however, use the more complex form of montage, which looks like this:

MONTAGE - JANEY AND HARRY FALL IN LOVE

-- Harry assists a kid who falls from his bicycle; Janey observes;
-- Janey helps Harry get the kid on his way; but he falls again.
-- Both Janey and Harry help the kid up, bump heads in the act, boink!
-- As the kid takes off, Janey trips, scrapes her knee; Harry helps her up;
-- Harry insists and applies a band aid to a reluctant Janey's knee;
-- Harry looks up, Janey looks down; eyes explore, seek, find;
-- Love explodes, pours out, a tsunami;
-- Hand-in-hand, Janey and Harry run to the beach, skipping brightly and laughing uproarously.


NEXT SCENE

Obviously this selection of scenes isn't what you want or need, but they illustrate the point of using this form.

I'd say if your creative juices are flowing at less than full steam go by this now and come back to it later, when you are refreshed and ready to go boom!

What you show will also, I assume, be predicated upon what we have already seen of these characters and their interactions, however subtle or direct they may have been. So it isn't like you're starting from absolute ground zero here. Or, if it is, you have one big mountain to climb (!).

Truth is, for me at any rate, something like this would require many interations and a lot of development before I'd be happy with what I had. I'd probably start by thinking about it several days before even writing something. Then I'd take a whack at it, see what I had, and keep revising, rewriting, editing until I was satisfied.

Probably not gonna get it in one pass.

Cheers! :)