Common beginner mistakes

Okay, we've all read lots of pages on the boards, many of us have reviewed scripts for PGL and other contests or spent time on zoetrope. Several have been professional readers and work in the industry.

Other then BIG problems such as bland story, poor structure, glaring errors, or bad format what are the most common beginner mistakes?

What little things add up to make you put a script down?

{This thread is intended to HELP make writers aware of these problems so they can avoid them, and thus improve their writing. NO PERSONAL SLAMMING ALLOWED.}

1) Twisting reality to make the story work. If a character is shown doing "bad" things you can't expect us to pretend he/she is good. If the story is set in real life you must obey the rules of this Earth. We will suspend our disbelief only so much. I read three chapters of a novel once then stopped when the hero got his horse to walk across a rope bridge. Yeah right.

2) Losing continuity in the story. Read pages a while back where a guy was in a ring surrounded by hundreds of screaming people. Suddenly he looks around, he's all alone, and so he makes a run for the door only to be grabbed by a bouncer and tossed back in the ring. Huh?

3) Thinking scenes. Sam sits and thinks for several minutes.
Several minutes is three pages!

4)My personal pet peeve? Unintentional alliteration. Small smiles, big boys, tender touches, mushy moments, etc.
They just stick in my mind and take me out of the moment.

in addition to what you've mentioned, here's my list, in pretty much this ranking order [yours coming after]:

1. novel-ish writing excess, instead of concise, clear, screenwriting style in the action element... this is the most common newbie 'sin' i come across in the hundreds/thousands of scripts i'm sent...

2. poor formatting... yes, it does make a difference!... if you want your work to be taken seriously, it needs to look as professional as possible... i won't even read far enough to see whether the story/plot is great or not, if the script is sloppy and/or amateurish-looking...

3. poor grammar/spelling/punctuation... no agent or producer is going to go to the trouble of correcting a writer's basic skills goofs... if someone wants to be a professional writer, imo, they must hone their skills to a professional level before trying to sell or enter their work...

this is, of course, just my own personal take on things... in addition to these and scripter's pet peeves, one thing i come across all too often, that i find hard to deal with is many new writers' conviction that their first, one-and-only screenplay will have some chance to be sold...

i'm accused of negativism by some, for pointing out that it takes years to get good enough at this craft/art to write marketable scripts and that the myth of a writer's first script being sold is just that.. a myth... most don't want to accept the fact that a lot of work and learning and studying and writing go into success in this industry... they seem to think that just anyone can write a screenplay... if that were true, they'd sell for pennies, and not thousands/hundreds of thousands/millions of dollars!

love and hugs, maia

mistakes

"this is, of course, just my own personal take on things... in addition to these and scripter's pet peeves, one thing i come across all too often, that i find hard to deal with is many new writers' conviction that their first, one-and-only screenplay will have some chance to be sold... "

Often, the first screenplay or manuscript written by a screenwriter or novelist is really about the writer. It can be hard for some people to admit that their personal stories may not be interesting enough to make mass sales. These writers are usually convinced that they have the greatest master piece of all time. That's why Ed Hansen, Carlo Padula, and all the other con artists posing a producers can take then in.

Basically, once you finish your first project and get it read and critiqued, it's simply best to move on and write your next screenplay. New writers shouldn't spend undue time correcting first script or two, because the story premise itself may be flawed, not viable.

one other thing

This is not a fault of the writing, but it is still a mistake. A newbie convinced that they can attract top talent to their script, like their favorite actor or director when all they have written is a script or two that hasn't been produced.

well put, justin...

...and needs to be said, sad to say...

[NOTE to our glorious board leader: imo, this would be a good thread to keep thumbtacked, or whatever it is you mods do to keep things up on top... it would be handy then, to direct newbies to when they're looking for basic advice... will save us a lot of repetition, doncha think?]

love and hugs, maia

Re: well put, justin...

Done! Any other thread ideas for the top??

FoxFire

My mistakes

SPENDING TOO MUCH TIME THINKING ABOUT WRITING AND NOT DOING IT (aren't I just doing that now). That's got to be no 1.

Sending my script out too early - before it was as good as I could get it.

Thinking my script was the most fantastic 100 pages ever written and anyone who didn't want it was either blinkered... or more probably stealing my ideas.

Thinking that cause no-one wanted it that they were saying it had NO MERIT AT ALL. (& even if they were....)

Oh, yeah, and thinking you only have to write one.

Still I didn't do the only 'fatal' thing... I didn't give up...

Re: My mistakes

buck up, x... you're far from alone!

your closing is the most important 'don't' of all... kudos to you!

love and hugs, maia

A few more

Explaining or trying to justify why an action has been performed.

Ruben hits Jessie across the back with a two by four. Jesse falls to the ground groaning because he's been hit so hard by the board.

Writing fancy. Using big and unusual words instead of keeping things simple and clear. You don't want the reader to have to use the dictionary.

Using a characters full name every time they appear. Intro them with the full name and then choose either the first or last name to identify them in dialog and then stick with that name.

Re: A few more

How about explaining what a character is thinking?

"Jesse starts to open the door, but stops because he remembers how his mother told him to always knock first."

I think many of the biggest beginner mistakes revolve around not grasping the whole "visual medium" thing.

Re: A few more

Even with visual thing... you have to take care not writing something that sounds like it'd call for special effects (unless, of course, you are writing a SFX script).

Re: Mistakes of a novice...

hey, jimmy!... it's good to see you 'out' again... glad to hear you're well into the development stage, but i'm sorry to hear you got stuck with an idiot for a director...

too true, 'bout that perfume thing!... i'll hafta add, 'writing stuff that isn't SEEN or HEARD' as one of the most common and annoying newbie goofs...

when it gets too much like this :headbang , try some primal scream therapy... just go out on your balcony or into the closet and scream as loud as you can, till it feels better... it really works... and saves lives!!! [yours and the director's]

:heart and hugs, maia

screenwriters

"Huh? Perfume isn't even mentioned before or after the scene...SO HOW DO WE KNOW IT'S PERFUME???

I've pointed this out to the director but he just doesn't get it. This is just one of many "wonderful additions" the director has made to the script. I'll tell ya, it's enough to drive you crazy. But hey, that's Showbiz!"

Well, be happy that your script is sold. And any writer who gets produced will need to accept that is work is going to be substantially changed.

The writer is many ways, of all the behind scenes people, is the least powerful.

As for what this director is doing, let him do it. What matters is that he makes a good film.

A reply...

Points I'm fully aware of, believe me. After several years in the screenwriting game, I figured I'd seen pretty much everything. But this current director is really throwing me for a loop with all his rewrite ideas. And hey, as aggravating as it is, I'm thankful just to have sold the script...and having the very real possibility that it'll get produced this year.

Always remember: A bad day as a screenwriter is still better than a great day as an insurance salesman. (My apologies to all you insurance salesmen out there.)

A funny one

Giving famous people unintentional cameos.

A large storage building filled with shelves. Motley crew unloads wooden crates from the trucks.

Just read that one today!!

Oh me oh my. :rofl

Okay, one more
Writing "magic" characters and vehicles that suddenly appear or disappear from nowhere and to nowhere.
{does not apply if your story is actually ABOUT magic.}
They must come from somewhere and go somewhere. :rofl

Re: A funny one

Rather than copying and pasting all of your posts from another thread and passing them off as genuine responses to this one, scripter1, why didn't you just post the link to the original Done Deal thread?

b3.ezboard.com/fdonedealfrm21.showMessage?topicID=3586.topic

Would've been a lot easier, IMO.

*Shrug*

Re: A funny one

Different groups have different opinions. They tend to be less offensive and less prone to stalking on this board.

-Derek
DOUBLE OR QUITS appearing in Issue 5 (April-June 2004) of SDO Detective

Re: A funny one

I just meant to start the thread off.

Re: Dialogue mistakes

1. Message speeches

If you want to send a message with your script ("Drugs are bad"; "Don't let yourself be bullied"; etc.), send the message through actions. A big, messy message speech, on the other hand, turns your script into a sermon. The merits of movies as teaching tools can be debated, but it's better to show what you want us to learn than to tell us.

2. "Brilliant" dialogue.

At best, this is gratuitous dialogue that draws attention to itself, taking the audience completely out of the story. At worst (and most frequently) it's dialogue that's SUPPOSED to be clever, but really is just painful to read.

If the dialogue you write is making you laugh, it's probably bad (especially if you're not writing a comedy), because usually the humor comes in the voice of the WRITER, rather than the CHARACTER. There's always a sacrifice to be made in this case. You should sacrifice brilliance for character; not character for brilliance.

3. On the nose dialogue

People rarely say what they mean, and characters should be no different. This kind of dialogue stands in the way of your script's believability.

MARY
I love you, John. I wish you hadn't left me last year. It was the hardest year of my life. I don't think I'll ever be the same.

JOHN
I know, Mary. I didn't want to leave, but I didn't like the person I was becoming. I think if I'd have stayed, you wouldn't have liked me much either. I needed to take that year and figure out what I want out of life. And now I know the answer: I want you.

MARY
I want you too!

Give me a break! Nobody talks like this! I know it's hard to believe, but if do your work on the rest of the script, this will suffice:

MARY
So...you're back?

JOHN
Yeah. I am.

MARY
You should hang up your coat.

If you've established the situation, the actors and director can handle the subtext.


You have to develop an ear for dialogue, so beginners shouldn't be frustrated if their characters don't sound natural right out of the chute. My advice is to worry about these problems when you're REVISING your script, not while you're composing the first draft. And remember:

What your characters SAY is not nearly as important as what they DO.

Dave...

Re: A funny one

Oh I hate those big secret reveals:

BAD GUY
Now that I've got you captured, I suppose I can tell you the whole thing before you die. You see, I killed your father and your mother and your brother and I raped your wife and your children and blamed it all on you. blah blah blah... now you know, you can die.

GOOD GUY
Not so fast.

Pow, Pow.

put it down

Bad dialogue is the killer. Good dialogue is what sells a script. Unlike Dave, I think what characters say and how they say it is at least as important as what they do.

You have to have both, but it's poor dialogue that kills most writers.

Re: A funny one

You're right about bad dialogue. But I think if you've figured out what they do, it's easier to write what they say.

I'm not a writer of any kind. But I do know when to concentrate on something and when not too regarding creativety.

If you concentrate on something it too long it will cause you'r mind to bog down and even stop in the creative juices of any project you are doing. It's like a light bulb, if you leave that light bulb on tool long it will burn out. The human mind is not suppose to function with it concentrating on something too much. Writers block can happen because of going at something to much. The mind is saying to you that your going at this too much, stop, back off.

The whole key to being creative is to have variety. To never allow your mind to concentrate on something too long or too short.If it's too long then it will burn out, if it's too short you forget key things and minute things which are crucial. You'll wind up losing either way.

The backbone to the key of being creative has to do with a process called "turn on/shut down". This means that no matter what you're working on, you have to walk away from it and get your mind to completely and absolutely forget everything and anything that you've been working on. Not just absolutely forget what you're working on but to forget for a period of time.

The reason why the mind must absolutely and completely forget what you're working on and for a period of time is because the mind is going through a process that you're absolutely unaware of. What it's doing is digesting and analyzing everything that you have done. You can't feel or tell that this is going on because its doing this on the subconscious level.This process that the mind goes through of digesting and analyzing what you have done is actually the back bone of being creative, with out it you can't be creative.

When you eat food, you're body has to be able to digest the food. When you're being creative, which is the equivalent of eating food, your mind has to be able to digest it just like your body has to digest the food that you just ate. you're mind actually does this naturally every time your not thinking of something and aren't thinking of, irrelevant to what it is. Its not just restricted to creativity.

When the mind is digesting what ever its digesting that you have created and don't have your mind on or any thought on, at the same time its analyzing it. When you eat food and you're body is digesting it,its also at the same time analyzing it. What kind of food, are there any poisons that came with the food,how heavy is the food Your body can digest and analyze your food with out you having a thought about it. But with creativity you have to get your mind off of what your creating so that your mind can digest and analyze it.

When your mind is analyzing what your creating, it will do one of three things. It will either 1) find something wrong 2) add creativity to what your doing, such as a "good idea" 3) both number 1 & 2. When you come back to being creative one of those three things will be waiting for you in your mind when you go back to concentrate on being creative. If any of those three things are'nt there then your mind has'nt digested it or has'nt completely digested it.

The amount of time to allow your mind to digest anything your creating is variant. Some times it takes a long time or a short time, some times it does it instantly but this is rare. Its just like when you eat food. If you eat certain kinds of food it will take your system a long time to digest it, with other foods its real quick. It depends on what your eating. The same holds true with being creative, it depends on what your doing. The more complex something is the longer it's going to take for the mind to digest it and Analise it.

The human mind is not a machine where it is suppose to pump out one good thing after another. This is total fantasy and absolutely impossible. There is actually a process the mind must go through in order to be creative. If you violate this process it can create writers block and creativity block.

When creating, irrelevant to whether its screenwriting, painting, or any other form of creativity the human mind must go through this process.

As far as being a screenwriter its actually best to have 3 or 4 screen plays one's creating at one time. Thus causing the screenwriters to go from one screen play to another. This will help prevent the screen writer to get bogged down in any one script. When I work on abstract paintings I do, I always work on 3 or 4 paintings at a time. I never ever concentrate on just one painting. Even masters who are the elite of the painting world have at least 2 paintings at any one time they are working on. you'll never see an artist working on just one thing, it will never happen.


When ever a screenwriter is working on 3 to 4 screen plays not just do they need to get their mind off of what they are doing with anyone script but must also get their mind off of screen writing all together. They must many times totally forget everything about screen writing and everything they are doing in screen writing.

The whole key of creativity revolves around what one is concentrating, how long they are concentrating on anything, how deeply they are concentrating on any one thing and how long the absolutely forget what ever they were doing

good luck (wink)

I disagree

"As far as being a screenwriter its actually best to have 3 or 4 screen plays one's creating at one time."

I completely disagree. It's not good to have a bunch of screenplays all in varying degrees of completion. If working like that is good for you, fine, but it doesn't get anywhere for me.

When a writer starts with his first script, the best thing to do is finish it. In order to polish it up, you do need to take a break from that script. SHortly after finishing your first script, you should start working on your second. At so one. After you have a bunch of scripts, you'll probably spend time going back on all of them editing and rewriting. But just to have 4 screenplays whose first drafts are in varying stages of completion is horrific advice.

Also, not all screenplays are written on spec. Many in fact are written under hire. In these cases, the director or producer is going to want to see your work by a certain time without any excuses. Even after you sell a spec, you typically have to do one rewrite, and again, you'll need to send it in without excuses.

I wasn't meaning under "hire" situations. Sorry

I wrote a book thats 280 pages long and it took me ten years to write it. I worked on all the chapters in the book the way i wrote above. May be theres something about screenwriting that I'm not aware of. It wasn't horrifying to me but then again wasn't working wit screenplays

Oh well