Starbucks Punctuation

[engmajor2005]

Say a character goes into Starbucks and orders a tall latte made with non-fat milk, just a little foam, sugar-free vanilla syrup, and decaf espresso. If it's ordered in coffee speak, here's how it would look:

"Tall decaf non-fat wet sugar-free vanilla latte."

Now, should it be:

"Tall decaf-non-fat-wet-sugar-free-vanilla latte" since every thing except for the size is a modifier of the noun "latte", therefore making the whole thing a long string of compound modifiers?

(By the way, I can spit out an order like that without thinking twice; sometimes the newer baristas have to ask me to explain.)

[veinglory]

I wouldn't hyphenate it exceot as a informal way of hinting at fast delivery.

I never say the modifiers in the right order and it bugs me when the staff correct me....

[aghast]

you wouldnt say 'she is a strong-lovable-cute-funny woman' would you?

it should be "A tall decaf, non-fat, wet, sugar-free vanilla latte" comma is your friend, sugar

[engmajor2005]

Thank you for the advice.

It takes practice. You have no idea how many hours of my life I lost to that little brochure you can pick up at Starbuck's...

But, once you know it, the formula is easy:

1. Size
2. Number of shots (if none specified, you get the standard number. Say "quad" for four shots).
3. If you want decaf or half-caf, say so now.
4. Type of milk (if none specified, you get whole milk; skinny is used for non-fat colloquially but around here in NC non-fat is just fine).
5. Other modifiers (wet, dry, no foam, whip, no whip)
6. Type of drink.
7. If you intend to drink your coffee in the store and want a mug, go directly to number 2 and say "for here" at this time. Or, if you want to show off and want your drink to go, spit out "with legs."

Basically, if you want to really impress an especially snooty barista, order a:

Quad venti half-caf half-and-half no whip no foam extra hot raspberry mocha with legs.

[PeeDee]

What, really? All that to order from Starbucks? Seriously? Egads! Usually, my starbucks order goes, "Tea, and I'll put the bag in myself, thanks. Large."

I wouldn't last ten minutes in Seattle. :D

(er. Sorry. Off-topic.)

[CaroGirl]

This is one of my pet peeves (I had a nice long rant the other day in a Starbucks). I like sizes to be called small, medium and large (extra small and extra large are allowable). I like coffee to be strong, medium or mild. I like my choices to be sugar, milk or cream and the amount to be up to me.

I HATE Starbucks, et al, for making ordering coffee so complicated I need to read through a guide to do so.

Oh, and I agree with using commas to separate your descriptors, especially if you're going for making it all look completely ridiculous.

[engmajor2005]

This is one of my pet peeves (I had a nice long rant the other day in a Starbucks). I like sizes to be called small, medium and large (extra small and extra large are allowable). I like coffee to be strong, medium or mild. I like my choices to be sugar, milk or cream and the amount to be up to me.

I HATE Starbucks, et al, for making ordering coffee so complicated I need to read through a guide to do so.

Oh, and I agree with using commas to separate your descriptors, especially if you're going for making it all look completely ridiculous.

The main rationale behind the coffee speak was so that the order would be more concise and the baristas could clear lines quicker. You have to admit; for someone making a precise order such as the example I gave, it's much quicker to use the coffee speak than not.

And you can walk into starbucks and order a regular coffee. There's nothing to do about the sizes mind you, but if you walk in there and say "Regular coffee please" then you're safe; unless the barista is a snot.

And I'm happy with the comma suggestion, especially given the example of describing another person.

[veinglory]

Going even further off topic (sorry) I've long had in mind writing a coffee table book on all of the uses of the name Starbuck to date from its original appearance to the coffee giant by way of Moby Dick and Battlestar Galactica... I think it would be a fun book.

[PeeDee]

"Tall decaf non-fat wet sugar-free vanilla latte."


I'm going to order all my drinks "wet" from now on. :D

[Sandi LeFaucheur]

Getting back to the original question, "Tall decaf-non-fat-wet-sugar-free-vanilla latte" gives an entirely different feeling than "A tall decaf, non-fat, wet, sugar-free vanilla latte". The second is undoubtedly correct, whilst the first isn't. However, if you want to give the impression of someone chanting it quickly (can one chant quickly?) I'd go for the first. If you want to give them impression of someone saying it in such a manner that it's more comprehensible, then the second fits the bill.

And Aghast--that's the first time I've seen you use punctuation! :)

[Sandi LeFaucheur]

Oh, and furthermore, I hope the order is followed by "please". One of my pet peeves is people NOT saying "please" to servers, be they in Starbucks, MacDonalds, or a five-star restaurant. They expect a thank you and a smile in return, but lack the civility to say please.

End of rant.

And I know everyone here would say please.

[PeeDee]

Oh, and furthermore, I hope the order is followed by "please". One of my pet peeves is people NOT saying "please" to servers, be they in Starbucks, MacDonalds, or a five-star restaurant. They expect a thank you and a smile in return, but lack the civility to say please.
End of rant.
And I know everyone here would say please.

I say please, I say thank you. I make friendly conversation. If they're busy, I am especially laid-back and non-demanding. I do not argue. I try to improve their days.

So you know. :)

[Kate Thornton]

"wet"??? What's that? (In a coffee, I mean - isn't it all liquid??)

[DeborahM]

I say please, I say thank you. I make friendly conversation. If they're busy, I am especially laid-back and non-demanding. I do not argue. I try to improve their days.

So you know. :)

PeeDee, your mother should be proud of you. :D

[engmajor2005]

"wet"??? What's that? (In a coffee, I mean - isn't it all liquid??)

"Wet" is less foam. Conversely, "dry" is more foam.

I'm ALWAYS a customer service person's dream come true. I smile, I say "please" and "thank you," I don't engage them in long anecdotes or conversations that they don't seem interested in, I'm patient (even if I'm in a hurry) and I never, EVER, fuss at them for something that's out of their hands. And even when they blatantly screw up, I shrug it off and say "It's alright."

I work in customer service myself, so I know what it's like to be on the other side of the fence and how nice it is when somebody is pleasant. Oh, and I always try to be knowledgable about what I want; a customer that cannot articulate their desire and expects to have their mind read is about as rude and obnoxious as an iPod at a funeral.

And I supposed (getting back on topic) that improper punctuation could be used to create an effect (as it often is), but do you think that "talldecafnonfantsugarfreehazelnutlatte" is a bit pushing it? Just curious.

[Sandi LeFaucheur]

"talldecafnonfantsugarfreehazelnutlatte"

Yup. That is definitely going too far. As they say in Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious--indubitably.

[veronie]

Star bucks is the name of the currency in my sci-fi WIP :)

[engmajor2005]

Star bucks is the name of the currency in my sci-fi WIP :):roll:

[Roger J Carlson]

I usually walk up to the counter and say: "Do you have just regular black coffee?"

On-topic: I vote for commas rather than hyphens.

[blacbird]

This thread illustrates why I drink beer.

caw

[Misnomer]

it should be "A tall decaf, non-fat, wet, sugar-free vanilla latte"Am I the only one who thinks that there needs to be a comma after "tall"? They are separate modifiers, and therefore should be separated -- the latte is tall and decaf.

Yes? No? Maybe so? :)

[MizzACEE]

God I LOVE Starbucks... my order is always..

Iced Mocha, nice and simple, but ohhh sooo yummy!

[ErylRavenwell]

*make the mental note to cut out the Starbucks venue from my novel*

That conformity of thought is just scary.

[KODB]

Personally, this is why I go to Waffle House. They have coffee. That's how you order it. You say, "A cuppa coffee," and that's what they give you. They have decaf, too, but you have to specify. If you don't, they'll bring you the best, most consistently smooth, perk-up-your-eyes coffee ever served in a greasy spoon. They'll sometimes ask if you want cream, but they'll ALWAYS bring you some, and they'll trust you to add it yourself, and the sugar, too.

AND they'll call you darlin'. Or babe, or sugar....

They ain't got no baristas at the Waffle House. Don't need none, either.

[clockwork]

This is easily one of the funniest threads I've read at AW since I joined. :)

I had no idea Starbucks had literature explaining how to order drinks.

If you're having trouble, get yourself one of these:

http://i63.photobucket.com/albums/h134/clockwork9/starbucker.jpg

[Ccake]

Say a character goes into Starbucks and orders a tall latte made with non-fat milk, just a little foam, sugar-free vanilla syrup, and decaf espresso. If it's ordered in coffee speak, here's how it would look:

"Tall decaf non-fat wet sugar-free vanilla latte."


I think for Starbucks you are required to call out decaf before anything else. So then that order would read:

Decaf, tall, non-fat, wet, sugar-free vanilla, latte

Also, how would a latte be wet considering for Starbucks you are only required to put 1/4 inch foam on top? Wouldn't you either have to change it to a no foam latte or a wet cappuccino?

[PeeDee]

COFFEE FLAVORED COFFEE!

*stomps off*

[WriterInChains]

Wow, I'm glad they don't make us speak a special language to get coffee here! I'd need the latte first, to be able to order it. :Wha:

[engmajor2005]

I think for Starbucks you are required to call out decaf before anything else. So then that order would read:

Decaf, tall, non-fat, wet, sugar-free vanilla, latte

Also, how would a latte be wet considering for Starbucks you are only required to put 1/4 inch foam on top? Wouldn't you either have to change it to a no foam latte or a wet cappuccino?

This is one of those regional things. In some places, they understand a "wet latte" as being a "no foam latte." Other places, you specify a "no foam latte."

And by the way, I don't feel foolish speaking the coffee lingo; whenever I go to a bar and hear a guy give a martini order that lasts fifteen minutes I feel, vindicated, somehow. ;)

[engmajor2005]

And as for where "decaf" belongs in the order, I've always put the size first and never had any problems.

[TrickyFiction]

I think for Starbucks you are required to call out decaf before anything else. So then that order would read:

Decaf, tall, non-fat, wet, sugar-free vanilla, latte

I used to work there. I concur that the decaf goes first. This is how it would be called (I'm adding shots just to show where the size goes).

"Decaf, double tall, sugar-free vanilla, non-fat, no foam, latte."

Just read down the cup for the order. Size goes after the shots, usually. Also, cappuccinos are traditionally wet or dry, while lattes are extra-foamy or no foam. You really don't have to worry about the order as a customer, but if we called it wrong as baristas, we would get a nice slap on the wrist.

I just knew this information would come in handy one day. Ha!