Format question - telephone

There are probably lots of ways to do it, here's one:

JOHN
(into phone)
Hello?

FRED (V. O.)
John? It's me, Fred.

JOHN
Hey, what's new?

FRED (V. O.)
I'm trying to figure out the best
way to write a phone conversation
into my new script.

JOHN
No idea. Good luck with that!

###

See, you can just use a voiceover for the non-present party.

This is my favorite method when showing both characters during conversation

From THE HOLLYWOOD STANDARD by Christopher Riley
Intercut Sequence

An intercut sequence is one that cuts alternately between two or more locations, most often to present all parties to a telephone conversation. Each location must be established with its own shot heading, and the instruction INTERCUT must be given. Thereafter, dialogue can flow as if all characters are present together and (V.O.) is not indicated beside any of the character names over dialogue.

INT. MARYANN'S KITCHEN – MORNING

She dials the phone.

INT. MARK'S OFFICE – SAME TIME

His PHONE begins to RINGS. He crosses to pick it up.

MARK [I didn't bother doing this with the proper tabs –CEA]
Mark Markisian and Associates.

INTERCUT telephone conversation.

MARYANN
Mark? It's Maryann. How are you?

MARK
Fantastic. I'm so glad you called.

Here's is another way to format the same conversation:

INT. MARYANN'S KITCHEN – MORNING

She dials the phone. INTERCUT WITH:

INT. MARK'S OFFICE – SAME TIME

His PHONE begins to RINGS. He crosses to pick it up.

MARK
Mark Markisian and Associates.

INTERCUT telephone conversation.

MARYANN
Mark? It's Maryann. How are you?

MARK
Fantastic. I'm so glad you called.

As for your particular, it's up to you, if the person is interrupted ellipses are perfectly fine.

wyzguy said:

Sorry. I'm looking for the format where ONLY ONE SIDE is heard and seen.
Thanks, though.

Click to expand...

That's really simple.

INT. KITCHEN

The wall phone RINGS. Sally picks it up.

SALLY
(into phone)
Hello?

Sally listens for a moment.

SALLY
Yes, I understand...

Sally twirls her hair between her fingers.

SALLY
Tonight? I can't, I...

Sally sits down at the table, the smile leaves her face.

SALLY
Oh, I see.

Sally leans on her hand, covering her eyes with her fingers.

SALLY
Yes, maybe then...goodbye.

Sally hangs up the phone and cries.

wyzguy said:

Thanks, icerose. I said I was a novice. I think ellipses, you write actions in the pauses. Much better.

Click to expand...

Hehe, sorry. It was my fault really. I had skimmed over your original post, missed the fact that you said one sided, and posted my two favorite ways of doing it, then when you posted that you wanted one sided I looked up and smacked myself in the forehead. I hope it helps.

All these action line inserts don't do it for me -- they make for a distracting read, and look as if they're artificially padding the page. Different if they were helping the reader's eye by breaking up huge blocks of dialogue. But bear in mind that phone conversations (especially the one-sided variety) tend to be static, and static can become very boring very quickly.

Anyways, as you can imagine, this question has been asked before! Some related threads you might want to peek at:

Questions re telephone dialogue, montages, naming characters
Phone call dialogue
V.O.

-Derek
My Web Page - shameless vampyre fiction & other shameless writings.
Think very hard. You been birddoggin' this township a while
now, and they wouldn't mind a corpse of you. Now you could luxuriate in a nice jail cell but if your hand touches metal, I swear by my pretty floral bonnet I will end you.

dpaterso said:

All these action line inserts don't do it for me -- they make for a distracting read, and look as if they're artificially padding the page. Different if they were helping the reader's eye by breaking up huge blocks of dialogue. But bear in mind that phone conversations (especially the one-sided variety) tend to be static, and static can become very boring very quickly.

Anyways, as you can imagine, this question has been asked before! Some related threads you might want to peek at:

Questions re telephone dialogue, montages, naming characters
Phone call dialogue
V.O.

-Derek
My Web Page - shameless vampyre fiction & other shameless writings.
.

Click to expand...

A page does what it does. If you have a page of a one sided phone conversation then the screen side of that conversation better be good in terms of dialogue, exposition and action.

So you wouldn't use (into phone) more than once throughout the conversation?

I dunno who you're asking, FT, but if it's a simple phone conversation with no one else in the room or phone booth, and whoever's speaking can only be talking into the phone, and it's pretty obvious that's exactly what they're doing, I'd probably only use (into phone) once. ...Ah wait, you mean icerose's example, sorry, pardon my intrusion. Well, that is a simple conversation with no one else there, so just the one parenthetical works for me. As always, as long as it's clear enough.

-Derek
My Web Page - shameless vampyre fiction & other shameless writings.
What about you? How come you're flying about with us brigands? Shouldn't you be off bringing religiosity to the Fuzzie-Wuzzies or some such?

The point of formatting is to be clear and concise. The less clutter you need to achieve that the better, at least in my opinion.

wyzguy said:

Thanks, icerose. I said I was a novice. I think ellipses, you write actions in the pauses. Much better.

Click to expand...

You're not the only novice here! Take heart