A different form of writer's block?

Yeah sometimes I do feel guilty about feeling good about my work and doing what I like while the people around me are working 12-hour days with low pay and bitching and moaning about how they hate their jobs. Yeah, guilty.

Then I realize, no one is paying me a few millions to do what I do yet. Back to work I go...

I love my job (12 hours a day and low pay not an issue) but I still feel guilty when I sit down to write. My inner voice is telling me to clean the house, do laundry, mow the lawn, load the dishwasher...whatever needs to be done. That's the inner voice I fight with all the time. I'm trying to learn to ignore it but so far it doesn't work all that well.

Don't listen to that nasty part of yourself that tries to stop you from doing what you love. I listened to mine for years. I stopped myself from writing for many years, in fact. You know what...we're alive only until we're dead. Do what you love without guilt. Write until you have to stop...because your fingers hurt too much and you either have to stop or cry. Don't listen to that guilt. It's just another type of internal editor.

I hate my job about three-quarters of the time. My roomie got to listen to me rant for about forty-five minutes last night after another day in hell.

Writing (plus a nice bottle of red wine) keeps me sane. It's something I love to do, wish I could do all day long and get paid for it.

Everyone is allowed something they love to do, MeowGirl. Don't feel guilty about finding time to write. For some people, it's a slice of chocolate cake. For other people, it's an hour fishing on a peaceful lake.

Just tell that inner voice to stuff it.

Read the Stephen King article [see thread above this]

*mystified*

Good lord, no. I've never thought "ye gads, this good time I am having with this writing, it cannot last! I must stop and go to work!"

Or if I do think that, it's because I'm running late for work and pissy that I have to stop.

I adore writing, and I adore the bits which make me really happy. Which is most of the bits involved, really. It's why I keep going.

I (at 26) watch football. I see these guys younger than me making millions of dollars hurtling themselves after a ball. They only get ten to twenty years of work. Then, their best days are behind them. Their time on the world stage is over. They sit in a mansion, or work in some token job in the front office, and that's it.

As writers, our best days are always ahead of us. The next book, or poem, or article is going to be better than the last, and has the potential to fnancially explode. Unlike when a office drone's project explodes, a freelancer will see the financial rewards of the explosion. Drones get an "attaboy".

I'm poor today, but my best days are always on the other side of the page.

Just keep on pushing through.

I am the opposite of Meow Girl. When I am NOT writing, I feel I am being self indulgent.

Guilt? You've got to be freaking kidding. I don't get much out of life except scribbling. I enjoy it and I steal every minute I can to devote to it. So no, I do not suffer from that affliction.

I suffer from the same thing but with help. It's been encouraged and nourished that if I am sitting down to write I am neglecting someone or something that needs my attention more than I need that free time.

I'm not sure if I'll ever get over it as it is a repetious cycle, just as things really start heating up in my WIP I get landed with an outside guilt trip and, well, it takes time to get through projects, a lot more time than I would care for it to take, but when you're a mother of three, you don't get such luxuries.

I stopped writing for years because I was made to feel guilty about that solitary time. I felt that it was a stupid, useless hobby and a venture not worth undertaking, because I was told so, and I believed him (and others) that I had more important things to do with my time. I resented it. I resented myself. and everyone who ever told me so, or treated me in a way that resembled that.
I divorced one of those naysayer voices in fact. (that wasn't the only reason). But I let someone do that to me, and I did it to myself. I didn't defend my right to do what I loved. I believed him when he said it wasn't worth it and stupid.
Well I started again, and I do have a lot of important things to do, a regular job to keep because it provides the insurance and money we need to support our family. My house needs to be cleaned, I let it slip when I'm in writer mode. Can't help it. When it's time to feed the manic I have to do it. But you know what? I will never feel guilty about writing again. Thankfully I'm with someone now who respects my need to write and encourages it. He deals with my "writer mood swings".
But it took a lot of convincing myself even after leaving a bad situation where I allowed myself to be convinced it was "wrong" of me to enjoy writing. (in fact it took some total dipsh#t at work to tell me that he was writing a novel. and I thought, Trish, if this guy can do it, why the hell aren't you?)
I did it to myself, I blame no one else. I let it happen. Years of "yea trish, those are some pretty high hopes" had worn me down, but I've shut them out.
Not now. Not ever. I don't care if anything I ever write never gets published, I hope it will, but it's the joy of the craft, baby! Pure and simple. I'll write till my hands or brain can't do it anymore.
Life's too short not to do what you love, and my imagination requires a page.
The guilt you feel is that part of you that tells you that you're not good enough. Don't listen. Write. Often. However it suits you.

Icerose, I have two kids, young ones. I take my time for them. I love to spend time with them. I write when they go to bed, before they wake up in the morning, at lunch during my day job, at nap time on the weekends, and sometimes, while they play in the family room, I bring along my notebook and write 1000 words watching them play. YOu don't have to neglect family to write. Don't let anyone tell you different.

My husband loves to hunt and fish. I told him that he leaves the house for his passionate hobbies, and that I am here for mine, but he needs to pretend at least for a little while every couple of days that I'm not even here. If he can go away for a whole saturday to fish or go bow hunting and sit in the woods for a whole weekend, I can write.
Don't let anyone tell you not to do it. There is time, you just have to find it.

Hi Trish,
I know, it's the finding the proper balance where neither feel totallly neglected. And my kids have never complained it's part of my own thing. I also need a lot of sleep so I don't have the luxury of writing while they sleep so it does have to cut into the day time. So striking that balance becomes even more difficult, in fact it makes it impossible to set a time and write every single day, so I do what I can.

I am getting much closer to that balance between myself, the kids, my husband, and my writing. It just became much more difficult because my eldest started kindergarten. My schedule is as follows. Wake up, get showered (if I don't take it then I don't get one) get my husband off to work, cook breakfast, feed the kids, clean up breakfast dishes and such, by this time It's about nine, then harp on them to get dressed, find their clothes, play with baby, dress them because they have stalled for the hundreth time, get their shoes on, by this time it's around 10:30, figure out what to fix them for lunch, get it going, get them to play outside for a bit, this is around the time my youngest wants cuddle time and she does not take no for an answer. Fix lunch and feed them, by this time it's around 11:30 not enough time to work on anything and it's pretty hectic around this time anyhow. Run oldest to school, wrestle with car seats and such come home, wrestle the two younger ones out, get them to settle down and take a nap, by this time it's 2:00 and then I have about 20 minutes to do quick pick up and dishes before waking the two younger ones back up to go pick up the oldest one, then it takes another hour or so to settle them all back down because I was forced to wake them up early because I don't have any help, by that time it's time to start on supper. Around 5 husband comes home, eat supper, clean up, play with the kids, get them to play on their own if I am lucky - right here is where I get the most chances to write but sometimes it's so hard to unwind my mind after the flurry of the day and the noise level isn't exactly low. Then 8 o'clock bath time, then get them in jammies, read a stack of books, tuck them in, kiss them good night, prayers, going on 9:30, I'm exhausted, sometimes I can write here, other times I am just too exhausted to even remember my own name as at this point my youngest still does not sleep through the entire night, I wish she did.

And that is my hectic schedule. In about 5 years all three kids will be gone for at least 3 hours and the other two will be gone for most of the day, by then I think I may be able to set a time to write and stick to it, but we will see.

I really do understand this sort of writers block and sometimes there isn't a whole lot of things we can do about it but try to weather it as best one can.

I guess my insomnia works in my favor, as well as the ability to have lunch at work to myself. I understand where you're coming from though. I really do.

Ah, I call it Paradise Syndrome. Things are going so well you feel guilty and wait for it to end.

Then I eat chocolate.

I'm with PeeDee and a few others here. It just doesn't compute with me--I really love writing, so much so that I can't do it? This isn't a judgemental statement. It just underscores the different personalities in a broad population, and how they react to similar experiences. Most often for me, I just can't seem to find enough time to do some of the things I love. But given the time, I throw myself into them.

I'm not sure if I'd go so far as to say I love writing, I find it's more of a compulsion. I only started about five years ago when I was in my mid-thirties, but since then it has been at the forefront of my thoughts everyday. Recently I've started writing articles as well as novels and short stories, and this has become another compulsion. Now I spilt my time between doing the two, which has given me a whole new boost of enthusiasm.

I've never felt guilty about writing. I still don't think of myself as being really good at it yet, so at times it's still a struggle. In fact, I think It'll always be like that, so as long as I'm struggling I won't feel guilty.

The ONLY time I feel guilty about the amount of time I spend writing, is when I realize my azz has gone completely numb and I should have been outside walking a few miles.

But when that happens, I go outside and walk a few miles.

Then I sit down and write more

Hang in there icerose. It does get easier when they go to school. Sort of. Then in the evenings there is homework and sports and cub scouts...etc...

But the time between when I drop them off at school and when I have to leave for work....ahhhhhhh....

Soccer Mom said:

Hang in there icerose. It does get easier when they go to school. Sort of. Then in the evenings there is homework and sports and cub scouts...etc...

But the time between when I drop them off at school and when I have to leave for work....ahhhhhhh....

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Thanks. I think I have done fairly well writing 4 350-400 page novels, and 7 scripts as well as four short stories in the past five and a half years while having three kids, infants are the hardest to write it. I think it will become measurably easier since my youngest has now turned one and I am adjusting to my eldest being in school.

It really does get easier. The first couple of years are so hard. Much as I love babies--they are so needy. Of course at this very moment mine are playing "dinosaur battle" in my bedroom, which is distracting, but at least I don't have to stop and change diapers or bounce them on my knee.

You've been very productive for three young ones. Kudos!

Soccer Mom said:

You've been very productive for three young ones. Kudos!

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Thanks, I have to remind myself that from time to time. Sometimes I think I should have more accomplished by now. I feel so underachieved lol. I thought surely by now I would have something published other than the PA fiasco.

I also thought I should have ten books by now, that's only two a year, but nope, I'm just a slow poke when it comes down to things, outside of my occassional burst.