2 hours later...

darkkazier · Sep 20, 2006

hey everyone, here is my problem. in my WIP I just finished re-writing a chase scene and now i have them driving to their next locaton. Nothing spectacular happens on the drive, so, how could i word it without saying something like "2 hours later they arrived at blah blah blah"

I was thinking of using time of day, but its a modern novel and they are in a big city and its the middle of the night. i have been told that saying something like "2 hours later" or "the next day" is just sloppy writing.

blackbird · Sep 20, 2006

Just leave a space and cut to the next scene. I find this to be often the least awkward way to handle transitions in time, and most readers easily accept such jump cuts because we're all used to seeing them in the movies.

blacbird · Sep 20, 2006

Unless it's important in the story for the time to be specific, I agree with Blackbird. If your characters have moved to a new locality, readers will just subliminally know that some unspecified unit of time has passed.

caw.

Silver King · Sep 20, 2006

A simple transition could include the distance traveled by car, along with the passage of time. "They drove 90 miles and reached the outskirts of Tombstone by late evening."

littlewriter · Sep 20, 2006

Unless the 2 hours of driving is important to the story, I'd just cut to the next scene. If you really need to get the 2 hours fact in there, you could slip it into some dialogue if it's possible with your story.

maestrowork · Sep 20, 2006

No need to say two hours later or 2:00 p.m... if the time is not important. Who cares? We just want to see what happens next. If you say, "Joe drove from Los Angeles to San Diego"... we kinda know it takes about 2 hours, so really, there's no need to tell us "two hours later, he arrived." Just do a scene break and start with something like "When he arrived, the woman was already dead..." etc. etc.

wordmonkey · Sep 20, 2006

...blah blah blah. They settled in for a two hour drive that promised to be dull and tiring.

* * *

Dusk was settling in as they cruised up to the curb. Blah blah blah...

That would be my suggestion.
(The *'s would be center, obviously)

Silver King · Sep 20, 2006

I won't argue the point too much, but really, how hard can it be to convey a two hour time span without resorting to a space centered by *** every time it needs to be done? The writer should be able to make hourly transitions appear seamlessly in his work without leaving spaces when the action needs to move forward in short spaces of time.

smiley10000 · Sep 21, 2006

I think it is standard to use

#

to represent a scene change rather than

***

10000

Shadow_Ferret · Sep 21, 2006

Well, I always thought # meant end. Kind of like -30-, not a transition. But what the heck do I know?

As far as the scene, why can't you just write what word monkey suggested but even leave out the transition space. Two paragraphs, normal spacing.

They packed their collection of Blue Oyster Cult cds in preparation for a long drive.

Dusk was settling when they arrived in the small podunk town of Brambling Falls.

maestrowork · Sep 21, 2006

In short stories, # or -30- means "The End" and "***" means scene break. In novels, however, # means line break. At the end, just type "THE END."

Shadow_Ferret · Sep 21, 2006

That explains it. I come from a short story background.

2 hours later...

darkkazier

blackbird

blacbird

Silver King

Megalops Erectus

littlewriter

maestrowork

Fear the Death Ray

wordmonkey

ook

Silver King

Megalops Erectus

smiley10000

What do we do? We write...

Shadow_Ferret

Court Jester

maestrowork

Fear the Death Ray

Shadow_Ferret

Court Jester