Stupid question

I would find an autobiography written in third-person to be as bad as people who speak about themselves in third-person, although I do seem to remember a few that described their very earliest life in third-person (almost as a sort of prologue). "The child was born on a bleak and frigid December morning. Two feet of snow had fallen the night before. The boy's parents, Elmer and Wanda Duffus, were poor but greeted their new son with joy . . ." But then at some point, the autobiography jumps back to a first-person account.

What would you seek detachment when writing an autobio? It seems to me that one would want to get as close as possible.

And I'm a bit confused. Are you writing an autobiography, a biography, or a fictional piece inspired by real life?

You called it an autobiography, but you refer to what I assume to be you as "the character".

Typically, an unsympathetic character is one the average reader just doesn’t care about; they can’t empathize with that character’s motives or actions, whether those actions are good or bad (there are other definitions, but I assume that’s what the publishers meant in this case). So, since the book is based on your life, either you’ve failed to show your motives and actions in a way that the reader will understand and/or care about, or you’ve come off so badly in the story that it basically turns the reader off.

You might want to dig deeper and more honestly into why you did whatever you did, and then look at how you’re “explaining” it to the reader. I’m not sure being more detached is the answer; in fact, you might want to write the story from a more personal and "heartfelt" point of view.

I agree with Alleycat, it sounds like you need to get closer rather than more distant. Sometimes, I think, it's hard to write about oneself with opening floodgates. But if you want people to know what you've been through, to laugh and cry and feel your pain, those floodgates do need to be open. I'd say stick to first person and make sure you have been honest with the reader about the events in your life, not just what happens but how they affected/changed you. The former (events) will create a compelling story, and the latter (a fully-revealed you) will create a "character," as you put it, with whom the reader can connect.