When to Break to a New Paragraph

I've never even thought about it. Thanks for giving me something else to obsess over...

That said, paragraph breaks create white space on the page. Readers like white space. A full block of text is intimidating to the average reader. Varying paragraph lengths looks good, too, on the page.

I will pull out a strong sentence from a paragraph and give it its own paragraph for emphasis. Sort of like what you did in your second example. Pulling out the bit about "all the right reasons" emphasizes it's importance. I might have glanced over it if it was included at the end of an unexciting paragraph, but with it out there on its own, my brain says, "Pay attention...this is important."

Wrting fiction is different from writing a term paper. Fiction doesn't require a subject sentence in the first line, followed by supporting sentences, and ending with a conclusion. It's more fluid. I bet if you quit thinking about it, you'll seperate paragraphs naturally.

But as for me, paragraphing will never be the same...

Personally, I vote for D) None of the above.

Here are the rules as I APPLY THEM (note that different authors will apply this method how it suits them.)

1. The dialogue of TWO characters should not appear in one paragraph. Separate them shortly before the new person speaks--probably about the time that they're getting READY to say something.

2. When you're in the same person's POV, such as this:

She looked at the flower and she smiled, remembering the day her lover last visited her in the large grassy field. She looked down at her bare feet and saw a tiny ladybug. It motioned slowly across each toe, leaving her in a pool of laughter.

It can remain together.

3. You can intersperse dialogue and narrative until you're bored or it FEELS too long for a single paragraph. Here's an example from the WIP I just FINISHED! (WOO! Another book in the can! ) It's a paranormal romance, with shapeshifters, so ignore the "otherworldly aspects."

The absurdity of the statement struck him and, despite his intended goal not to offend her on the trip, Adam barked out a surprised laugh. "My God, is that what all this has been about? The dozen phone calls over the last week, telling me how much you needed to get away? The barely-there shirts you’re about to fall out of? You’re bucking to be the alpha female of a new pack!" He shook his head with mixed amazement and annoyance. "I’ve spent three days on the road with you, trying to figure out your angle. But this . . . this one didn’t occur to me." Adam tapped one finger on the steering wheel and shook his head in tiny little movements. He had no doubt she could smell his annoyance and couldn’t help himself—he had to raise his sunglasses onto his head to see her reaction.

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This is a single paragraph, with dialogue and narrative interspersed until the character is done.

Now you COULD separate this into multiple paragraphs, but that's not my preference.

So, for your two examples, I wouldn't separate them at all. JMHO, of course.

Where have you people been all my life?

I don't know how many times over the last few years I've asked myself this self-same question about para-breaks (whether to group thoughts or break them up by white space . . .), fretted about it during the re-write and then just hoped that my instincts were right and just gone with my first inclinations. And I didn't ask anybody because I thought "real writers" didn't have these questons.

mary
in wonderland

Well, I personally view a paragraph as a type of transition from point to point.

Using the example.

She looked at the flower and she smiled, remembering the day her lover last visited her in the large grassy field. She looked down at her bare feet and saw a tiny ladybug. It motioned slowly across each toe, leaving her in a pool of laughter.

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In the element of style, a paragraph is composed of a topic, support and conclusion. I suppose this could also apply to fiction.

A- Topic-She looked at the flower
B- Support- Remembering the day and looking down at her feet seeing a ladybug
C- Conclusion- The Ladybug motioned slowly across each toe, leaving her laughing.

This helps me keep a certain organzation. But technically, a pargraph could even be composed of a single sentence!

I'll understand if the paragraph mechanic from the Style guide may be wrong or ridiculous, but that's the way I learned on my own. Maybe someone else can chime in with a more detailed answer.

I guess it depends. i agree that you should never put two charas dialogue in the same paragraph, it gets really confusing.

so unless ya gotta lot of detail to go with the chara's dialogue, you usually keep it by itself. as in it makes its own paragraph, no matter.

I picture the scene in my head and break into a new paragraph wherever the camera would shift to a new POV.

But do bear in mind that I'm not particularly experienced and am still learning the craft.

It all has to do with flow. And, in my opinion, flow is something we all need to be very much aware of in our writing. How does it flow?

I look at words and sentences and paragraphs in a story as always having a kind of forward motion, pushing the reader toward a goal. That forward motion is "flow" and it can be controlled by how long or short our words and sentences are and how we break up our paragraphs.

Break a paragraph in the wrong place and it impedes the flow. But knowing where and when to break to a new paragraph is an instinctual thing, something that can only be learned by a lot of reading and a lot of writing.

Some writers have beautiful "flow." Some don't.

And we learn from both.

Rob

In addition to having dialogue by different characters appearing in different paragraphs, I try to keep action by character A out of paragraphs containing dialogue from character B. Do it consistently and you can lose a lot of dialogue tags/attributes (the 'said' word).

"Man, it's pouring!" Dave set the wipers to the fastest setting. "Here she comes."

A woman ran across the field, twirling and dancing as the rain dripped from the cloudy gray sky. "I'm so happy indeed," she said, with hands thrown into the air, meeting every drip.

Juan picked up the binoculars. "Good thing we set up the sonic amplifier with rain reduction. Otherwise we couldn't have heard what she said." He trained the binoculars on the woman, turning his head to follow the wipers.

Dave suppressed a grin. Watching his rookie partner was like watching the fans at Wimbledon. Except none of them could plant a super-miniaturized listening device. "Think she'll fall for the ladybug?"

I also agree that readers like their white space. I know I do. Even when I'm really enjoying what I'm reading, I find myself skimming by the midpoint of a long paragraph. One writing instructor suggested that we start looking for an appropriate paragraph break around line six, and look harder if we haven't found it by line ten. I go beyond that occasionally, but rarely and not by much.

Maryn, long-winded

paragraph

In nonfiction, there are solid, usually easily understood rules about when to break a paragraph. It isn't as simple in fiction.

In fiction, paragraph breaks are as much about rhythm and flow as about rules. It is, I think, as much a matter of instinct as of grammar.

I've never thought about this subject before, so I've enjoyed reading people's responses. I agree about not making paragraphs too long. I've also skimmmed over long paragraphs before (including when I'm reading posts on forums!).

I agree that paragraph breaks in fiction are as much about pacing, rhythm, flow, and emphasis as they are about conveying information in a recognizable pattern.

i agree that it is all about rhythm and flow, just break for a new para if it looks and sounds more natural to do so.

Risen_Flower said:

It's makes sense now. At least I have more info now than what I had before. Sometimes, I automatically break when I think the flow has changed, but a lot of times, I'm unsure. It can be tricky at times I suppose.


Ex. C

He kissed her farewell and she threw her arms around his neck. He stood back, watching her as if he was reading her thoughts. "Goodbye," he said.


Her only response was a graceful smile.


She watched him leave and then she turned towards the train, anxious for a new beginning. At the entrance of the train, she sighed, lowered her lashes and smiled once more, before she took the first step unto the train.




Excuse any misspells or so please. I'm just using examples.

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In this example, I'd choose Ex. C. The reason being is that you've SWITCHED POINTS OF VIEW. The first part is from HIS perspective and the third part is from HER perspective. In between could be either one. There's no way to judge in which person's head you are, BUT it's a strong, pausing paragraph that lets the reader . . . sigh. You're pulling emotion and setting up the transition to the new POV.

Does that make sense?