You think I should WHAT?

Anonymisty · Aug 6, 2006

It seems that ever since I declared my intention to pursue a career in writing, I've been getting wacky advice, mostly from people who know little or nothing about publishing. The most recent bit came this week. My supervisor at work told me about an article she saw in Newsweek, about the exciting benefits of publishing-on-demand. She knows that I have a contract for my first book with Tor, but she was convinced that I would sell more books if I went with a POD instead, since "the books won't cost as much to the readers."

What goofy advice have you been offered?

RedWombat · Aug 6, 2006

Well, nobody's given me any advice recently, but way back when I was starting college, people knew that as a kid, I had wanted to be a writer, and yet, I was majoring in anthropology.

So a parade of well-meaning relatives and guidance counselors said "Well, that works! Then you can write about anthropology!"

What I was too insecure at the time to say was that I could not easily imagine anything more tedious. I wanted to write fantasy novels.

Anthropology was full of fascinating tidbits, but most of the anthropological writing I read was drier than toast bones. The parts of my brain that wanted to be a writer were full of tormented heroes with giant swords whacking off the heads of gibbering horrors, and were probably not going to be appeased by authoring yet another treatise on food-gathering among the !Kung.

Still, they meant well.

stephblake24 · Aug 6, 2006

I write novels, but my husband wants me to write a screenplay.

ChaosTitan · Aug 6, 2006

I haven't been offered goofy advice, but my dad regularly offers up story ideas. The only things he writes are shopping lists and "don't forget to do this" notes, but he has a rather...ah, interesting imagination.

Some of his ideas I've written down for potential future use. Others I just smile, nod, and then promptly reach for the Brain Soap.

SeanDSchaffer · Aug 6, 2006

I remember most of the goofy advice I received, being of the 'how to get published' variety. People who never had any inkling of being a writer within them, told me that if I did not find a publisher after, say, two or three tries, to give up writing and go find a real job.

Another person told me that to write good SF (I write Fantasy) I needed to learn lots of mathematics or I would never write a convincing story.

I've had one person tell me to go with PublishAmerica (well-meaning gentleman, but knowing very little about the publishing industry--he's a songwriter, not a novelist) which is a Print-on-Demand company. When I found out the evils of that company, that same person told me I should stick with them because "Innovators are always laughed at, at first".

My step-dad told me, when I was a teenager, that I could only write what I had done. (I didn't have the heart to tell him Gene Roddenberry had never piloted a starship or talked with a Starfleet captain--in truth I didn't want to be punished for back-talking him.)

I've had total strangers tell me how to be published, and almost every one of those total strangers told me stuff I knew was not how things work in the Industry.

maestrowork · Aug 6, 2006

- you should write a thriller with a lot of sex. that's what sells (while it's not totally untrue... that's just not what I write)

- the vanity press thing comes up time and again

- you might not want to write anything with Asian themes, settings or characters; that might typecast you as an Asian writer (Huh? I am an Asian writer)

- your protagonist should always be likable, a hero. And you always need a villain.

- write an epilogue and tell us how the characters all turn out (ummm, actually, I am planning a sequel)

Andre_Laurent · Aug 6, 2006

Try this one out.... don't start a new novel until you sell the first one.... and if I never sell the first one???? Fantabulous advice.

Anonymisty · Aug 6, 2006

SeanDSchaffer said:
My step-dad told me, when I was a teenager, that I could only write what I had done. (I didn't have the heart to tell him Gene Roddenberry had never piloted a starship or talked with a Starfleet captain--in truth I didn't want to be punished for back-talking him.)

I had a teacher in high school who failed me on a creative writing assignment for that very reason! I wrote a story from the point of view of a woman during the Civil War, and the teacher said she didn't read past the first page, because I didn't live then, and therefore had no way to write "authentically" about it.

I'd love to know her definition of creative, since it obviously differed from mine. *grin*

Nangleator · Aug 6, 2006

I've gotten lots of 'networking' advice. Yeah, it's good to network for other types of work, but it's been suggested I call agents and editors, and try to meet them at parties. (I don't live in NY.)

I've also had several people say, "I know someone in publishing. Maybe I can put in a good word!" And it turns out the person is a manager in a K-12 textbook publisher, or is a press foreman at a commercial printer, or works at a newspaper.

Yeah. That helps. Inside track, there. Watch out, Stephen King.

And, of course, everyone thinks my manuscript will be stolen if it isn't copyrighted, poor-man's copyrighted, and followed by a private detective.

icerose · Aug 6, 2006

Anonymisty said:
I had a teacher in high school who failed me on a creative writing assignment for that very reason! I wrote a story from the point of view of a woman during the Civil War, and the teacher said she didn't read past the first page, because I didn't live then, and therefore had no way to write "authentically" about it.

I'd love to know her definition of creative, since it obviously differed from mine. *grin*

That is so awful, did we share teachers???

I was told to give up now because I came from a poor family and poor people never go anywhere.

Stew21 · Aug 6, 2006

In a writing class in college, we did peer crits. The guy who critiqued mine wrote his comments, and then we were to turn them in to the instructor. He then critted them and graded them.
The remarks from the peer were. "You are sick and twisted. There is probably something really wrong with you. You might not want to consider pursuing this as a chosen field." NICE guy!
The instructor wrote "sick and twisted is creativity, and it works. Keep at it."
That was a relief, but I never quite got over that sick and twisted thing.

Cathy C · Aug 6, 2006

"You should write romances. They're really quick and easy!" :roll:

(At the time, we had just published an historical novel.)

Boy, did that sound good after three years of research for the one I'd finished! But now that I AM writing romances, I discovered that there's no beast more difficult to write than the double-arc book (romance as one arc, and the plot as the second arc.)

Be careful what advice you take...

Linda Adams · Aug 6, 2006

We received a critique where the person told us that narrative was the only thing that told the story and that we should delete all the dialogue. :Wha:

A co-worker thought I was stark raving crazy for going the traditional route. He recommended that I self-publish because it was too hard to get published the other way. He'd written three books, and never even tried submitting them.

I've had the "You should write romances" advice, too. They kind of missed the fact that I don't exactly enjoy reading them ...

A critiquer pointed to a single word in our first line and said that agents would reject the manuscript on that word because it was "too writerly." He used that same comment on someone else's manuscript. :Wha:

Which leads to the next one ...

Upon hearing who our intended readers were (and those of the second manuscript), he said, "Why would you want to write for women?"

moth · Aug 6, 2006

I haven't gotten any goofy advice. Just sentiments of "well, you know we support you and whatever you'd like to try to do...but let us know when you're all done with that writing thing and ready to move on to something else." They mean well, and I don't hold it against anyone, but it's not very encouraging. Ah well, that's what the watercooler is for!

SeanDSchaffer · Aug 6, 2006

I remember one time I got a bad mark on an otherwise perfect piece of work--in High School--because I called the Book of Revelation, the Book of Revelation. When I explained to the substitute teacher that 'Revelation' did not have an 's' at the end of it, she dismissed this fact because I was only a student, and what do students know?

Another thing I remember, also, was the psychologist who told me that a writer without at least four years of college could never be published. After all, a psychologist is much more of an authority on the writing industry than a writer is.

:Shrug:

Siddow · Aug 6, 2006

I was told that I needed a doctorate to write about being a mother. 'Cause yanno, just being one doesn't lend the same kind of authority as having a PhD attached to my name.

Andre_Laurent · Aug 6, 2006

Siddow said:
I was told that I needed a doctorate to write about being a mother. 'Cause yanno, just being one doesn't lend the same kind of authority as having a PhD attached to my name.

PhD = Piled Higher and Deeper

Sorry, but I couldn't help myself.

Gillhoughly · Aug 6, 2006

Them: Wow--you're a real writer? Then you need to write a bestseller and make a lot of money!

Me: Whoa--you're on to something there! I never thought of that one!
---------------------------------------------

My first really big signing I got to sit next to a very well known Name in fantasy writing. He asked how I'd broken in. I gave him the short version (shopping around the first book which sold while I worked on my third).

He wondered aloud why I'd been working on a the 2nd & 3rd books in a series when the first was still unsold. He seemed genuinely puzzled and not a little patronizing.

I decided he was a total moron for even asking that, but I'll be nice and not name his Name here. (Buy me a beer sometime and I'll let it drop, heh-heh.)

The other worst advice was a quote from some super-name writer. He was one of the literary superstars before there ever were superstars. (Why that is I don't know, as I think his writing stinks.)

About 35 years ago my dad--who did NOT get my wanting to write--waved an article about the dude under my nose with this quote underlined: "There are too many writers in the world, we don't need any more."

That's as close as I can recall. PO'd beyond speech, I ripped the article out, took a hole puncher to it, and called my dad into the bathroom so he could see me flushing the bits down the loo.

I don't react at all well to bad advice.... :poke:

Be safe, just buy me a drink and we'll kvetch about religion or politics.

Lyra Jean · Aug 6, 2006

I was told I need to get really into one of my hobbies Fanatically so and then write articles for magazines about my hobby.

Does this mean I should write an article that points out all the mistakes and loopholes there is in X-Files?

I was also told I should write romances since I'm a woman. I write science-fiction and no I don't have a degree in any science field.

Cassiopeia · Aug 6, 2006

I have been asked to write a book on what it was like to be LDS(not involved in the religion anymore), divorce, recovery from abuse from a very religious LDS man, and living in the Salt Lake Valley.

I thought ARE YOU INSANE?

I would definately have to use a psuedo name for that one.

KAM · Aug 6, 2006

Three different people have told me this: "You should write my life story - it's be a bestseller for sure!"

writermom · Aug 6, 2006

KAM said:
Three different people have told me this: "You should write my life story - it's be a bestseller for sure!"

arrowqueen · Aug 6, 2006

'Three different people have told me this: "You should write my life story - it's be a bestseller for sure!"'

Do we know the same people?

smiley10000 · Aug 6, 2006

KAM said:
Three different people have told me this: "You should write my life story - it's be a bestseller for sure!"

You know what? I'll tell you a secret if you promise not to tell!

I have a couple friends who I would love to ask if I could write their life story. It WOULD be a bestseller!

:sigh:I just have not guts to do it...

I haven't ever gotten any silly advice. I think it is because me Grandmother published a book so the family knows what it takes and the rest of the world either doesn't know or thinks I am too beyond help to even offer it.

10000

Qelenhn · Aug 6, 2006

My Dad's advice was to write YA. He thought if I could tap into the Goosebumps fans I'd get rich quick. This was after working at Barnes and Noble for a few years, so I thought it was probably reasonable advice if I was writing for the money and not because I like the non-YA fantasy novels I'm working on.

You think I should WHAT?

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