How would you write this?

The mc will feel this conflict too -- so assuming that you are showing their thoughts you could have a brief passage of them pushing through to carry on in whatever way applies (numb, angry, denial?)

I'm assuming that the MC witnesses this gruesome death at the hands of his or her adversary. If so, this death may actually energize the MC to do the right thing or what his or her buddy would want the MC to do. A combination of emotions could cause this: rage, frustration and disgust all rolled into one to make the MC just kick butt.

If you have shown how your MC is physically and emotionally fatigued because of the events of the novel this will have an even greater impact.

drevil915 said:

Hi everyone, there is a scene in my manuscript in which a very important character that is very close with my mc dies. The manner in which he dies is gruesome but it also happens right in the middle of the climax...so I really can't stop the prose to show the impact this has on him, but I also don't want it to come off as "the character dies and then that's the end of it." Know what I mean? Where's the middle ground here?

Thanks,

(Doc) Jason

Click to expand...

Don't quite have enough info to give an intelligent response, but that never stopped me before!

I faced a similar situation with my MC. The death of his friend (and the knowledge of who killed him) was the impetus for action--it forced him to overcome seemingly insurmountable odds to do what needed to be done. His emotions were displayed in his actions. Basically, without knowing the exact situation, perhaps you can show the effect of the death on your MC rather than tell what he is feeling.

Why don't you post the actual situation and see what we can come up with?

I would suggest watching a deep touching war movie. Like Saving Private Ryan, or Saints and Soldiers.

Something with a lot of action, a lot of death, especially of those they care about, but also having to move on to survive. They give some time to the characters, sometimes not much, but you know those characters aren't forgotten to the others. Even if it's little things, like in Saving Private Ryan. ETA: Black Hawk Down, the leg shot. Good scene.

He takes the blood stained letter and in a later scene is recopying it to a clean sheet of paper because he doesn't want the soldier's father to see his son's blood on the paper.

You can also try talking to a soldier who has served in a war. Ask him/her about a situation where a brother in arms died, ask them to just tell stories even. You'll get the reactions you are looking for.

I would have some lingering over the body, even if it's from a distance. Take something personal with him, a memento, or have an earlier scene where the dead man gave his friend something important. This will allow him later reflection on past events, and remind the reader what kind of presence that particular character invoked in the story and on your main character.

Where is this? A war zone? A Supermarket car park? A holiday camp?