How do you write about yourself?

Writing about yourself can seem a little scary at first. Do I really want to expose my emotions to everyone? Will they laugh at me? But, believe me, this can be a very useful exercise. It's amazing how different things look when they're on paper. That's one of the reasons why using journalling is useful in dealing with personal trauma. If you have had some problems in life (haven't we all?) writing about them can be very cathartic. Also, by sharing your writing with others, it may help them to deal with their own problems.

Another reason this has been suggested, is probably to get you into the habit of writing. Staring at a blank sheet of white paper can be daunting but if you just can't put pen to paper then try writing this over and over: I just can't think what to write at the moment because...... Keep going until the reasons for writing come to you, then start writing them down. Then when you feel more comfortable looking at your own thoughts, move on to why you want to write? What is it that drives you? Is there anything that happened in your life that makes you want to write? Etc. etc.

Hope I haven't bored you with this rather long post just wanted to help

Thanks, scarlet, for your reply!

I have done a lot of writing, but I have trouble writing about myself. I don't really know how to tell what is important and interesting and what is boring, because, honestly, it all feels boring to me. How do I decide which is the stuff people will want to read about? You can't just write about whatever you want, but I don't know how to separate the wheat from the chaff. I hope this helps. It's kind of hard to explain my problem, so if I'm being too vague, let me know, and I will try to give you more information.

Celia, I think one of the keys to not being boring is making sure that the parts about yourself are relevant to the whole. I will warn you that it is (I think) the most difficult writing. I borrowed some snippets from my life in my nonfiction workbook that I wrote for women dealing with depression. Make sure it's really relevant, really tight writing. Save the long rambles for your own journaling. In fact, journaling will give you a jumpstart for some of your material--but I wouldn't recommend taking stuff verbatim. It's a different type of writing. Try to avoid being overly introspective, but do write from the heart. Pretend that you are having coffee with a friend and you are sharing that experience with her, and its significance in your life. Anticipate her reactions or questions, and try to address those as well, to fill in possible gaps for your reader. Don't be afraid to express your very real emotions re the experience. This is what the reader wants to identify with.

Hope that helps...

I don't have any problems writing about factual things from my life, but I find it incredibly difficult to give them the emotional context they need to make a compelling story. One thing I have found helps is to give myself a different name and try to think of myself as a character in a story rather than thinking about writing about me and my life. This has allowed me to gain some distance and perspective on personal writing.

What a great idea Tish! Wish I'd thought of that one

As for being boring: some writers are able to write about cabbage soup and still make it interesting. Who used to give you it, or force you to eat it? Do you have fond memories of that person or horrible ones? Is there a funny story connected to them? What sort of clothes did they wear? I had a short-sighted, old auntie who thought the grass stains on my trainers meant I had foot rot. At least that's what I told her and she believed me - tee hee!

Have you got a trusted friend or better still do you attend a writer's group? Even better post something here and one of us can tell you if it's boring or not.

I'd bet most write the good tidbits of themselves into their stories -- but just the good tidbits. The 1390 on the SATs. The acceptance into Cornell. Scoring with the cheerleading captain. A daugter's victory at a soccer game.

Some negatives give big, popular anti-hero vibes. Drug use. Going to jail. Vandalism. Being Luke's father. Piss drunk at a bar. Negatives like this can be spun into material for a good yarn.

However, the gritty stuff -- unpopular stuff because we hate to confront it again -- seems to get left alone. For instance, cheatin on your husband. Hitting your child. Being diagnosed with manic depression. It would take a backho for some to dredge those feelings and images up again. And certainly, those blackest deeds that are hardest to admit would certainly be even more difficult to put on paper. It becomes an admission or, at least for that writing, a form of therapy that many aren't prepared for. Plus, the more you admit or write, the less you have in the vault (a la Peterman buying Kramer's life stories on "Seinfeld")

scarlet said:

Have you got a trusted friend or better still do you attend a writer's group? Even better post something here and one of us can tell you if it's boring or not.

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Thanks so much for the suggestion, scarlet! I posted something here:

http://absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?p=553631#post553631

It's just the first of a rough draft. I just wrote about a detail of my life that Joshua thought was interesting. It's pretty short, and it won't take up too much of your time. Thanks!