Dialogue Formatting

scribbler1382 · Feb 6, 2006

Looking for some comments/opinions. When I write dialogue, I pepper it with a lot of prose, but I've noticed a lot of writers will only put the dialogue and tag in the same paragraph and then put the prose portion I use as a separate paragraph. Here's what I mean:

Me:
"Jack, get your *** in here!" Captain Smith called. He had
every right to be pissed. It was his case, after all, and I was
responsible for messing it up so bad.

Others:
"Jack, get your *** in here!" Captain Smith called.

He had every right to be pissed. It was his case,
after all, and I was responsible for messing it up
so bad.

(Try not to comment on the dialogue itself...I just made it up for this example.)

James D. Macdonald · Feb 6, 2006

Either can be correct. Chose the style that's most effective for the story you're telling.

Cathy C · Feb 6, 2006

I'd remove the tag altogether. The exclamation point takes the place of the word "called." Try this instead.

"Jack, get your *** in here!" Captain Smith's baritone made me freeze in my tracks. As much as I hated to admit it, he had every right to be pissed. It was his case, after all, and I was responsible for messing it up so bad.

Wherever possible, insert action in place of a tag. Publishers will love you for it!

Good luck!

Cheryll · Feb 6, 2006

Marty: I've notice this myself. In my own writing, I tend to make a new paragraph to give the reader a natural pause. But I think either one can work.

Cheryll

blacbird · Feb 6, 2006

There is no "rule". You'll see it done both ways, successfully. As a reader, this formatting choice, by itself, doesn't matter to me. What does matter is the content, both of the dialogue and of any associated narrative.

caw.

(grasshopper) · Feb 6, 2006

James D. Macdonald said:
Either can be correct. Chose the style that's most effective for the story you're telling.

Oh, thank goodness!
I have felt the separate paragraph method works best for my story but have been wondering if it was right. It is surprisingly difficult to find any advice on this particular subject. Good to know it's a judgment call.

maestrowork · Feb 6, 2006

Both are fine and you can use them whenever it makes sense.

Dialogue Formatting

scribbler1382

Write For You, Edit For The Reader

James D. Macdonald

Your Genial Uncle

Cathy C

Ooo! Shiny new cover!

Cheryll

blacbird

(grasshopper)

maestrowork

Fear the Death Ray