Dew-Behind-The-Ears Newbie Requests Some Tough Love

jjdebenedictis said:

I think of myself as a novelist. However, I had this book that wasn't working as a book, and I finally realized it should have been a script all along.

So I wrote that, and I really like it! But that's not the point of this post.

The point is I've been trying to get up to speed on what one does to try to sell a movie length script, and I'm a bit overwhelmed. Much of the online advice I've read contradicts other online advice, and I don't know what to believe or where to start. Could someone who knows this business advise me on the following?

1) I've read that if you try to get representation at one of the major agencies via a query letter, your letter will simply not be read.

Is this true? Or is it what people tell themselves to feel better about the fact the chances of you getting a response are very close to zero?

I can handle it being nearly impossible to break into the industry; that's a given. What I want to know is if it really is a waste of paper to even try this route, because it's the one I feel most comfortable with. Going to L.A. is not an option; I would very much like to handle this as I would if I were querying a literary agent (if that's possible), i.e. Step 1: Send query letter. Step 2: Get interest/Get ignored.

2) If you could give me your top five pieces of advice for where/how to start, what would they be? What does a wet-behind-the-ears, clueless newbie need to know about breaking into the industry?

(And feel free to answer with some variation on, "Go read this AW thread, you ignorant spit-puddle. <link provided>")

Just so everyone knows where I stand, I wrote my script in Celtx (as a spec script, not a working script), so it should be formatted correctly. It's 122 pages, so it's about the right length. I assume I can figure out loglines and treatments and other beasties by researching them, so you don't need to offer advice on those.

My real point of anxiety is: once the script is as polished and awesome as I can make it, what do I do with it? It's the industry that confuses me, not the "write an enticing story" aspect. Who do I approach? And how? And where do I find information on who to approach?

Thanks in advance to anyone who can offer advice, and I do apologize if I'm really asking dumb questions here.

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Okay, a few points and questions.

You say that you "think of yourself" as a novelist. Not to make too fine a point of it -- are you actually a novelist? That is -- have any of the novels you've written been published?

If they have, it gives you certain edge in terms of credibility when you're trying to sell your work, and more importantly yourself as a professional writer.

Also -- these days, 122 pages is too long. Your script shouldn't be no longer than 110 pages. So, knowing nothing at all about your script, I know one thing. It's 12 pages too long.

Without knowing how much experience you have had in other kinds of writing and whether that experience is at a professional level or not, I hesitate to give you this piece of advice but since you ask for the "top five" pieces of advice, this is generally among the top pieces of advice that get offered.

Trying to sell your first screenplay to a studio (they generally sell for low to mid-six figures and the movies that are based on them -- low budget movies these days, start at ten to fifteen millions dollars) is not very different from painting your first painting and trying to sell it to the Museum of Modern Art.

Now, again - if you're an established writer in some other medium -- an established novelist or a playwright or a journalist and are simply venturing into screenwriting for the first time, then maybe it's not so silly.

But, while it's not impossible for someone to sit down and write a screenplay without every having written anything else ever before and have it be brilliant -- in the same way, I suppose, it's possible for someone to sit down at a canvas and paint or draw something brilliant without ever having done it before -- on the whole, that's not generally how it works.

I just make that point for the record, since the advice that usually goes here would be something along the lines of -- you should write at least two or three screenplays before you start trying to sell them.

It may or may not apply to you or your screenplay but it's right up near the top of the advice that people give when this question comes around.

What people say about cold submissions to agencies is mostly true. The majority of agencies do not accept cold submissions. They want, at the very least, some kind of recommendation.

You may find that it is actually easier to put your script into the hands of producers and development companies than agencies. While things have tightened up pretty much everywhere, because places aren't buying and aren't developing as much material as they used to, it is still possible.

I go into more detail about this elsewhere (if you want to search around for posts on this topic that I've answered -- it comes up rather frequently, as you might imagine) - but basically, in my experience, the most successful way to go about it is through cold calling.

That is, you target production and development companies, using either on-line sources or the Hollywood Creative Directory, find the names of the Director of Development or Creative Exec, call and ask for them.

When whoever answers the phone asks what it's about you're going to face the moment of truth -- because you don't have an agent (unless you have a book agent).

You're going to have to tell whoever it is that you're a screenwriter and you want to talk to X about a recent project of yours. At which point they're going to ask you if you have an agent. At which you're going to have to say, No. If you just stop, they'll explain that they don't accept unagented submissions and hang up on you. But if you continue and say, "No, I submit through my attorney." -- sometimes they won't hang up on you.

Sometimes they will put you through. If you have a book agent, even better. Then you can say, "Yes, I have a book agent. Mostly I write novels and I submit my screenplays though my book agent." Even better.

Because people in Hollywood are snobs and they love screenwriters who write plays and novels (so long as they're published).

Then you get put through to whoever it is (or more likely his or her assistant). Be really nice to the assistant, remember his name because he will be critical to your future success) then get on the phone with whoever it is. You'll probably have five or ten minutes to introduce yourself, convey that you are not a crazy stalker but rather a pleasant and friendly member of the human race and also a fully professional screenwriter who is able to successfully and enthusiastically convey what it is about your idea that is going to make a hundred million people plonk down ten bucks to go see it -- you'll have around three or four minutes to do that.

Having successfully accomplished that, the exec in question will ask you to send him the script. He may or may not request a release form. They may send you one of their own. Or may ask you to send a standard release that you can download.

These release forms can be either moderate or draconian. Doesn't really matter -- legally, they've proved to be pretty much unenforceable.

Then, of course, you need to get your attorney, presuming you have one -- to send them your screenplay.

For the purposes of submitting a screenplay (only) it can be any attorney at all, so long as they have an office and some letterhead. A family attorney. A relative who's a lawyer. It doesn't matter.

If the time comes to actually negotiate a deal, however "any" attorney will not work. It will have to be a attorney who has specialized in entertainment law. It's a very specialized field. Any attorney will not do.

If you have any other questions, I'll try to help.

NMS

Are there any alternatives to cold calling on the phone NMS?

What about submitting e-queries to management companies that do look at screenplays? Or even emailing development companies and prod cos. Or do those emails just get auto deleted without a look in?

What if you are published, but it was non-fiction and it was a few years ago (but did get into the top ten bestseller list in your country).

Sitting across the pond, the whole finding an attorney to submit through seems a bit daunting, but then I suppose there's nothing about the process that isn't. It's not common for people to have a lawyer here.

It's a shame we can't just write and let everything else take care of itself. We have to also market etc.

What if you had a screenplay that was produced and have an actual credit but it's in Ireland? Any way to use that to knock on hollywood's door? (I don't have it yet but I may do in a few months).

Klazart said:

Are there any alternatives to cold calling on the phone NMS?

What about submitting e-queries to management companies that do look at screenplays? Or even emailing development companies and prod cos. Or do those emails just get auto deleted without a look in?

What if you are published, but it was non-fiction and it was a few years ago (but did get into the top ten bestseller list in your country).

Sitting across the pond, the whole finding an attorney to submit through seems a bit daunting, but then I suppose there's nothing about the process that isn't. It's not common for people to have a lawyer here.

It's a shame we can't just write and let everything else take care of itself. We have to also market etc.

What if you had a screenplay that was produced and have an actual credit but it's in Ireland? Any way to use that to knock on hollywood's door? (I don't have it yet but I may do in a few months).

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People have succeeded through e-mail queries, through snail mail, just as there are always the very rare occasions where someone will write a screenplay with no prior experience and it'll miraculously sell.

So I can never say categorically that those things never work. They can work -- so if your circumstances rule out cold calling then sure -- go for whatever means are available to you.

Any professional writing experience is better than none. If you've sold a screenplay in Ireland and it's about to go into production, it's certainly fine to mention that. Generally, you phrase it along the lines of, "I've recently had a screenplay, XYZ, optioned by *Company Name* a Development Company based in Ireland in association with (Hopefully Bigger Studio That They Know) and scheduled to go into production in (whenever).

If you're querying, you want to try to phrase your experience in a way that neither comes across as bragging or puffing nor as self-deprecating.

The key to querying is to convey the sense that you are a confident professional writer. That means that they want to get the sense that you have professional writing skills and experience and, most of all, that you have something that is worth reading, buying, and ultimately making.

And you're going to need to do that in a couple paragraphs.

That is a significant writing challenge in itself. And you are also going to have to confront the same bar in respect to management companies, agencies, and production/development companies.

And that is -- without some prior vetting, most of them don't want to read something that just comes in off the street.

That's the purpose of a recommendation.

That's the purpose, to some extent, of stating prior professional writing credits.

That's the purpose of submitting things through an agent or even a lawyer because it suggests that you're familiar with the way things are done professionally.

Most of what everybody reads is junk -- even after vetting. So the last thing anybody you're likely to send a query letter to -- be it an agent or a management company or someone at a development company or what have you -- is to read something else.

So when they're alone in the privacy of their office, just they and your e-mail or your letter faced with that choice -- do I want something else to read that's probably not going to be any good -- what's the line of least resistance?

That line is the one that runs from your letter to the waste basket. Or from their finger to the delete button on their keyboard.

On the other hand, once they've made that commitment to talk to you, that choice is much harder, because it actually means saying "no" to a living person. So unless you give them an easy out along the lines of, "We don't make those kinds of movies" or "We've actually just optioned something just like that" -- in other words, a "no" that doesn't in any way criticize your work, it's hard to do.

People like to say yes. They don't like to say no. It's unpleasant. When you work as a professional writer it's pretty normal for you to get kicked off of assignments at some point. It happens more often than not. And it pretty much always ends up being your agent who lets you know about it - because nobody that you actually work for wants to do the dirty work.

So once you get on the phone it's more likely that not -- unless there's an easy out, that they'll tell you to send the script. Because, "send it along" is easy -- it makes you feel good. It makes them feel good. It ends the phone call so they can get back to work. Saying no makes everybody feel bad and, from their perspective might turn ugly and argumentative and prolongs things and why get into it?

That's why calling tends to have a better outcome. No guarantees, obviously -- because sometimes they'll have their own "easy outs" that give them a way to say no and pass the buck.

But you always end up playing the odds in this process. The more scripts you write, the more queries, the more contacts, the more calls -- however you do it.

And as for your credit, it should definitely be part of your introduction whether in writing or in speaking as in, "Hi, I'm so and so, I'm a writer from Ireland. Mostly I've written non-fiction. This book XYX about this or that was the best selling whatever -- and recently I've gotten into writing screenplays -- and go from there.

NMS

Fair enough.

Thanks for the detailed reply, and what you say makes sense.

I had heard previously that I should avoid mentioning my non-fiction credit since it wasn't directly relevant to my writing fiction or screenplays and probably isn't an indication of my ability to write something publishable/producible. So it's interesting that you say to mention it anyway. Which I'm glad to hear from someone with current and professional experience in the industry.

As for the screenplay credit, it's still very much a question of if's and but's. An upcoming director wants to make it into a movie. His producer is on board. IF they can find the funds. The director seems sound and is keen so I'm hopeful, but I won't know for a couple of months at least and I'm not really counting on it because I figure these things tend to not work out more often than lead to success. I remain cautiously hopeful but certainly not expectant.

Still, it's nice to know that someone is interested enough to put in the time and the effort it takes to actually make this into a movie. So that's progress at least.