Felt vs touched

stitchingirl · Nov 18, 2011

I'm trying to find grammar tips on this, but am coming up empty.

I know there's a difference between using "felt" and "touched", but I can't find anything about it.

Wouldn't it be if you do the action then it's "touched", but if it happens to you then it's "felt"?

For instance:

"Alicia wasn't prepared for the guilt to wash over her as she remembered she felt her hands roaming over Simon's broad chest."

Wouldn't it be?

"Alicia wasn't prepared for the guilt to wash over her as she remembered touching Simon all over his broad chest."

Is there a site that has a good grammar tips for instances like that?

seun · Nov 18, 2011

Out of your two examples, I wouldn't use the first. The felt isn't needed. She used her hands to roam over his chest. As it reads, she used her hands to feel them roaming over his chest.

In any case, felt is filtering. Put your readers in the action. They already know this is from Alicia's POV. They don't need to be told that again - which is what you're doing with the use of felt.

Maryn · Nov 18, 2011

Listen to seun. He's nailed it.

Anne Lyle · Nov 18, 2011

Yep - seun's nailed it.

Also, search on here for "filter words" or "filtering" - you'll probably find a few threads with more examples on constructions to avoid.

LilliCray · Nov 18, 2011

Yes, seun's nailed it with the examples given--but are you referring specifically to when feel is used as a synonym for touching? That's the impression I got from the thread title, but in the examples given, that's not how feel was used.

Like, if you "feel a carving," versus if you "touch a carving". "Feeling" the carving would be more an active exploration of the carving's details with one's fingers, whereas "touching" the carving would have connotations of one's fingers coming into contact with the carving but more briefly.

seun · Nov 18, 2011

Maryn said:
Listen to seun. He's nailed it.

Anne Lyle said:
Yep - seun's nailed it.

LilliCray said:
Yes, seun's nailed it with the examples given

Wow. In fact...double wow.

stitchingirl · Nov 18, 2011

Thank you for the tip, Seun.

To answer the question, a friend was the one who wrote a sentence with "felt" instead of "touched". I was trying to explain that there's a difference, but not sure if I got it right.

That sentence that I used in my example, was something that I just made up in that second. Unfortunately, I deleted her email that had the scene in there.

I thought that it was if you were doing the action, then it would "touched". If it was something that was being done to you, then it would be "felt".

"the man she shamelessly felt all over" (found it after all). I told her that it should be "shamelessly touched all over". Which is what I thought it was. She was doing the action, so it would be "touched", as compared to "felt".

Anne Lyle · Nov 18, 2011

stitchingirl said:
I thought that it was if you were doing the action, then it would "touched". If it was something that was being done to you, then it would be "felt".

"the man she shamelessly felt all over" (found it after all). I told her that it should be "shamelessly touched all over". Which is what I thought it was. She was doing the action, so it would be "touched", as compared to "felt".

No, LilliCray has it right. The two verbs have subtly different meanings, but can both be used in the active mode. "To feel" has connotations of exploration/examination, whereas "to touch" is more neutral.

"He touched the wall" vs "He felt his way around the darkened room".

"He touched her cheek" vs "He felt her pulse".

Your friend's "the man she shamelessly felt all over" seems weird to you because it sounds more like a TSA search than lovemaking!

stitchingirl · Nov 18, 2011

Your friend's "the man she shamelessly felt all over" seems weird to you because it sounds more like a TSA search than lovemaking

Now that did make me giggle out loud. But I think that's what threw me off. My friend and I live in two different countries, so the English she knows is British English, while I'm American English.

Anne Lyle · Nov 18, 2011

I'm British too, and it sounds "not quite right" to me. Although maybe she meant it tongue-in-cheek - if the character really is embarrassed, she might be masking it by describing the action in derogatory terms. It's hard to say without additional context.

The Lonely One · Nov 18, 2011

I think touch refers specifically to two objects colliding in space. Could be inanimate objects. Doesn't mean either object "felt" the collision.

Whereas feels implies a sensual response by the "toucher," it makes your sentence more about the person touching and how it affects them. Plus it has more general connotations referring to emotions etc., but it depends on the context, I guess.

^my thoughts.

sally_laramie · Nov 18, 2011

The best thing to do is read it aloud and you'll see that the first one doesn't sound right and is harder to understand, whereas the second one makes more sense for the reader.

dangerousbill · Nov 18, 2011

stitchingirl said:
I'm trying to find grammar tips on this, but am coming up empty.

I know there's a difference between using "felt" and "touched", but I can't find anything about it.

Touched is objective, and needn't involve the senses. I can touch a table, or my wife's shoulder. Two chairs can touch each other.

Felt is subjective, and refers more to the sense of touch. I felt the polished surface of the table. I felt the warm damp of my wife's shoulder.

stitchingirl · Nov 18, 2011

Thank you, dangerousbill.

That was exactly what I was looking for, and was the explanation that I tried thinking of. Now I can email her and give her that explanation.

bonitakale · Nov 18, 2011

Sort of like "looked" and "saw." One is using the sense; the other is the result of using it.

Susan Coffin · Nov 18, 2011

seun said:
Wow. In fact...double wow.

Well, I'm going to triple wow you. Excellent examples.

sunandshadow · Nov 18, 2011

I normally think of the difference being that when you "touch" your purpose is to affect the object you are touching, but when you "feel" your purpose is to gather sensory data. E.g. She felt her way along the pitch-dark tunnel. vs. She touched the tunnel wall hoping to accidentally trigger the hidden doorway. Or, She felt the rich velvet of her dress. vs. She unwisely touched the hot pan.

jaksen · Nov 19, 2011

But does the expression, 'he felt her up' have a slightly different meaning than 'he touched her?'

I suppose it's all in the context.

Architectus · Nov 19, 2011

I agree with trying to avoid both words altogether. Other filter words too, like see and hear.

SRHowen · Nov 19, 2011

The filter words, (I think of them as distance worfds) there is an entire list of them, what they do when used is distance the reader from the story and the characters. John touched Sue's hair. VS The silken strands of Sue's hair slipped through John's fingers.

The same with other filter words, they create distance and don't add much to the scene or the "feel" of the scene.

WriteMinded · Nov 19, 2011

Feeling is a sensation. Touching is an action.

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