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View Full Version : Which of these would be stronger, in your not-so-humble opinion?


Elise-K-Ra'sha
10-14-2011, 08:46 PM
Please answer and then state your reasons for why you've chosen what you have.

Faide
10-14-2011, 08:57 PM
Orc liquor because in my head orcs're these big, stout fellows that can drink straight from a sewer without suffering for it--it takes a lot of alcohol to get them even remotely drunk. They can outdrink a dwarf any day.

areteus
10-14-2011, 09:35 PM
All of them... the reason being that each one is designed for a particular physiology and if you don't have that physiology it will have different effects on you... so each one is stronger to each race than their own variety.

Sharii
10-14-2011, 10:44 PM
I imagine Orcs are pretty much desensitized to anything, so their booze would have to be exceptionally strong to have any effect on them. They are also raging sado-masochists.

By this logic, the rank from strong to wussy would be:

Orc > Dwarf > Elf > Human > Halfling.

But according to Peter Jackson, it would likely be more:

Orc > Elf > Dwarf > Halfling > Human.

Possibly because all halflings do all day is drinking and smoking. And elves are robot.

Just my very humble opinion.

Buffysquirrel
10-14-2011, 11:32 PM
I'm voting for the Orcs. They're big, so it needs to be stronger to have an effect.

bongalak
10-15-2011, 12:55 AM
I'm thinking dwarves actually. I just picture them chilling in their meadhall, sitting around their long table bashing their barrel-like mugs against each others', and the puddles of spilled beers are literally ankle deep on the stone floor.

As for orcs I see them hunched around a campfire, each of them clutching a giant piece of drumstick of unknown origin, and just tearing into them without a word or even a cup of ale; because screw being merry and drunk, it's all about the meat.

whistlelock
10-15-2011, 09:08 AM
In my fantasy world it would be Orcs, Dwarf, Human, Elf, Halfling.

Chris P
10-15-2011, 09:13 AM
Orcs for the many reasons stated above by people not quite so humble as I.

JSDR
10-15-2011, 09:35 AM
My elves are wild and eat anything, including fermented/ decaying things all the time. What they can drink would kill an orc. :evil

Boxed elves, though, would probably rank between dwarves and humans.

pandaponies
10-15-2011, 11:26 AM
As for orcs I see them hunched around a campfire, each of them clutching a giant piece of drumstick of unknown origin, and just tearing into them without a word or even a cup of ale; because screw being merry and drunk, it's all about the meat.
ROFL. PERFECT.

I answered orcs; I was thinking dwarves until I saw orcs were an option ("Psh, no contest," thought I). It's the big, brawny factor. :P

Satsya
10-15-2011, 01:01 PM
Originally I thought Dwarves or Orcs, but on second thought: Elves.

Elves seem like exactly the types that would have this incredibly intoxicating drink that only they can handle without instantly keeling over. They'd probably have a lot of fun challenging larger, more macho races to drinking contests.

Canotila
10-15-2011, 01:05 PM
It'd be interesting if orcs didn't metabolize alcohol as efficiently as other species, so couldn't handle it as well even though they're large and brawny. Maybe that's why they're stereotyped as being brutish and angry all the time?

I can totally picture orcs swilling beer that is far nastier than other people's though. The skunky smells-like-rat-pee kind.

areteus
10-15-2011, 02:33 PM
In a local linear LRP game I used to play, elf and dwarf alcohol affected humans by giving them massive hallucinations or knocking them immediately unconscious or one of many random effects...

I would say halflings are higher on the scale of hardiness, though. They are actually quite tough and drink a lot more than humans. I think they are more on lines with the dwarves.

Elise-K-Ra'sha
10-15-2011, 07:18 PM
I figure there'd be a different process for each species. It's very fun to read the answers.

John Ayliff
10-15-2011, 11:46 PM
It depends on what these races are like in your setting, but I'd imagine orcs to have real spoon-cleaning, make-you-go-blind stuff, which they can make anywhere out of anything, because getting blind drunk is the only release they have from the unpleasantness of orc society.

Dwarves would have pretty strong stuff as well, but they'd approach it differently--it would be matured for hundreds of years in great casks stacked row upon row in forgotten halls of stone.

BRDurkin
10-16-2011, 03:04 AM
Dwarf liquor, because Dwarves are stereotypically some of the hardiest people out there. Not only physically, but also mentally as well. I imagine they'd need something super strong to get properly drunk.

Pthom
10-16-2011, 03:09 AM
All of them... the reason being that each one is designed for a particular physiology and if you don't have that physiology it will have different effects on you... so each one is stronger to each race than their own variety.
^This

jaeladarling
10-16-2011, 03:41 AM
I'll vote for humans just because we're stupid enough to concoct the nastiest, most potent thing possible and see who can down it the fastest.

Korak_Karnar
10-16-2011, 04:26 AM
It really all depends on your setting...

Stereotype-wise, I voted orc, because honestly, for some reason I would think an "evil" race would have more potent booze. Don't ask me to make that make sense. That said, in my WIP orcs aren't evil, and are actually rather smart and un-orc-like, by most standards. But I digress...

I would say Orc > Dwarf > Elf > Halfling > Human. Last two perhaps interchangeable. Orcs have the nastiness to want super-potency, and dwarfs and elfs would have the age/experience and possibly magic to have the know-how to make super-old, super-strong liquor. Humans and halflings, by contrast, don't really have anything in their favor...humans have inventiveness, and halflings have passion for the subject matter. Neither really compare to magic or experience, hence their place at the bottom of my mental list.

BRDurkin
10-16-2011, 09:03 AM
It really all depends on your setting...

Stereotype-wise, I voted orc, because honestly, for some reason I would think an "evil" race would have more potent booze. Don't ask me to make that make sense. That said, in my WIP orcs aren't evil, and are actually rather smart and un-orc-like, by most standards. But I digress...

I would say Orc > Dwarf > Elf > Halfling > Human. Last two perhaps interchangeable. Orcs have the nastiness to want super-potency, and dwarfs and elfs would have the age/experience and possibly magic to have the know-how to make super-old, super-strong liquor. Humans and halflings, by contrast, don't really have anything in their favor...humans have inventiveness, and halflings have passion for the subject matter. Neither really compare to magic or experience, hence their place at the bottom of my mental list.

That actually makes pretty good sense to me...

Phaeal
10-16-2011, 07:08 PM
Well, according to Peter Jackson, who must be right:

Orc liquor really, really sucks -- ask Dominic Monaghan.

Elves easily drink dwarves under the table. But dwarves are funnier.

Hobbits get drunk enough on less than a pint and a half of ale to betray their companion's secret identity.

Humans can pretty much handle their liquor -- you didn't see any Riders of Rohan falling off Edoras, did you?

TheRob1
10-17-2011, 03:03 AM
I'm going w/ Dwarves, humans/halfings, elves, and orcs last

To my thinking: brewing and distilling, which both take time and patience, are not skills possessed by the orcs. Anything they drink is either traded for or taken by force.

I figure humans and halflings would be about on par with each other, but I don't actually have any halflings in my world.

Elves... would probably be very close to on par w/ humans. Probably even equal in some respects. Elves, as I like them most, are not concerned w/ the strength of their beverages. I do imagine their beverages being very skillfully crafted and having great flavor, but not necessarily being strong.

Dwarves I see as being the top brewers and distillers. Sure, it's probably from the tropes of the genre, but I see their toughnes causing them to value stronger drinks. Dwarves are usually considered expert craftsmen so I also think they'd not only want to make strong drinks, but exceptional ones as well.

GeorgeK
10-17-2011, 09:48 AM
Other: The strength is likely to be about the same as far as alcohol content because you can only distill it so far. What will be different are the flavors, particularly if they add something after distillation. Alternatively some yeasts can also make ethers and esthers which is the main reason that home distilling is a bad idea. You can produce something that is basically an anaesthetic. So maybe on that basis, since orcs are likely to think it funny if someone stops breathing from drinking their swill, I might accept orcs as the answer.

Apsu
10-17-2011, 01:44 PM
Before reading the replies of others, I chose Dwarf because I imagine Dwarves and Orcs might have similar passions for strong drink, but Dwarves would be more advanced at making them. I imagine Orcs as drinking something akin to fermented mare's milk, with Dwarves not only far advanced in making beers, but also wines and strong grain alcohols.

JimmyB27
10-17-2011, 02:36 PM
Human (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Everclear_%28alcohol%29).

Elise-K-Ra'sha
10-17-2011, 07:57 PM
Dwarves I see as being the top brewers and distillers. Sure, it's probably from the tropes of the genre, but I see their toughnes causing them to value stronger drinks. Dwarves are usually considered expert craftsmen so I also think they'd not only want to make strong drinks, but exceptional ones as well.

That is a very interesting point. I like it.

dogfacedboy
10-17-2011, 08:32 PM
I went with human mostly based on the idea that the drink would depend largely on the materials used in production. Grain alcohol (everclear) would likely require a society to have enough surplus of cereal grains after feeding its population to produce the spirits.

Based on common fantasy tropes, neither elves' woodland nor dwarves' underground societies would be well suited to the mass production of grains needed for this purpose. Orcs seem to be much less agrarian in nature, regardless of habitat. Halflings could probably swing it as easily as humans could.

Not sure, but I also think that temperate to colder climates would be more likely to produce higher-grade alcoholic beverages. Gotta stay warm somehow.

ironmikezero
10-18-2011, 12:58 AM
Human... The species with the most dynamic curiosity and creativity will inevitably craft the most potent drink. Should any other race find it too tame, a human will always find a way to enhance its potency and effect. Now consider a profit motive... strong brew will always be marketable, and humans will always engage in commerce.

GreenEpic
10-18-2011, 01:57 AM
I voted elven liquor. They seem to be the most magical, so they are able to handle more than anyone else.

Don't let a smaller stature and beauty fool you. :)

Elise-K-Ra'sha
10-18-2011, 02:12 AM
I'm actually quite glad I posted this. I did it strictly out of curiosity, but it's definitely given me something to think about for writing.

Thanks to everyone who's voted so far and offered the reasons why! If you haven't done so yet, why not?

Martin Persson
10-18-2011, 03:42 AM
Orc Liquor is so strong it is potentially deadly to non orcs. But it can have the side effect of hyperactivity in small doses. I always imagined that Merry and Pippin were given some kind of orcish booze when they were running to Isengård. This is because orcs are so resilient they need stronger stuff to numb their minds.

GeorgeK
10-18-2011, 07:51 PM
Based on common fantasy tropes, neither elves' woodland nor dwarves' underground societies would be well suited to the mass production of grains needed for this purpose.

They could trade for it and historically that has happened. The main use for distilled beverages in ancient and not so ancient times is for potable water. Take a barrel of, "looks clean," water from the river, pour in your bottle of rum or whatever, wait until tomorrow and that barrel of water is most likely potable whereas 2 days earlier would have given you dysentery.

Also, perhaps the elves have mastered the top of the canopy and grow a rich nectary orchid at the tops of the trees and harvest that? Maybe the Dwarves have cave dwelling sugar ants?

Not sure, but I also think that temperate to colder climates would be more likely to produce higher-grade alcoholic beverages. Gotta stay warm somehow. All through history people have known that significant drinking will accelerate hypothermia, so drinking to stay warm doesn't work. The only thing it helps with is to make you feel warmer quicker after coming in from the cold. That is at the cost of reducing core temperature, but if you are already inside, that's not a major issue.

Teinz
10-18-2011, 08:08 PM
I'd go with with dwarf-liquor, them being career-drinkers.

Viktor Night
10-18-2011, 09:18 PM
The reason why I didn't say Orcs is because I don't see them doing a lot of brewing. Or any other organized production, like smithing, farming, fishing, etc. I figure they're more of the wandering barbarian types that just terrorize the land and take whatever they can get their hands on. All weapons, clothing, tools and food would have originally belonged to someone else.

They may be tougher and able to handle stronger drink, but I just don't see them sitting around a pail of moonshine for six weeks waiting for it to ferment. That's a lot of wasted smashing time.

:)

John_W
10-18-2011, 10:03 PM
I imagine orcs drink straight from the gas pump. At finer dinners, turpentine. They hung out with the more scientifically advanced Sarumon, so they have the hook-up to get you messed-up.

Ardent Kat
10-20-2011, 10:16 AM
Remember, we're talking about races and their potential to make this alcohol, not necessarily who would enjoy it most or who could drink the most...

I went with human mostly based on the idea that the drink would depend largely on the materials used in production...

Based on common fantasy tropes, neither elves' woodland nor dwarves' underground societies would be well suited to the mass production of grains needed for this purpose. Orcs seem to be much less agrarian in nature, regardless of habitat. Halflings could probably swing it as easily as humans could.

Yup. I chose humans for the same reason. Whether they're brewing potent beer or wine, the raw ingredients would require a lot of agriculture and humans have farmland and agrarian culture in fantasy books far more than elves, dwarves, or orcs.

Whether their constitutions can handle it or not, elves are usually written as rather restrained conservative people, so why would they go overboard to brew strong drink if your temperant society discourages you from being drunk?

Orcs and dwarves seem enthusiastic for strong drink, but I don't see them having the means to make it in the strength or quantity humans could.

Halflings--Who knows? I don't see as many of these in fantasy stories so it's harder to generalize.

GeorgeK
10-20-2011, 09:08 PM
Whether their constitutions can handle it or not, elves are usually written as rather restrained conservative people, so why would they go overboard to brew strong drink if your temperant society discourages you from being drunk?.

Because historically the primary purpose in making liquor was not as a beverage in itself, but as a way to sanitize drinking water. It's easier to carry a bottle of rum and an empty barrel, than a barrel of water.

Elise-K-Ra'sha
10-20-2011, 10:23 PM
Because historically the primary purpose in making liquor was not as a beverage in itself, but as a way to sanitize drinking water. It's easier to carry a bottle of rum and an empty barrel, than a barrel of water.

Historically speaking, people also boiled water to sanitize it and one of the best ways for them to drink it was by adding tea. If we keep running with the historical bits, we lose some of what makes the races involved magical. That bit of information is nice to have, but it can limit the amount of creativity a person has if strictly going by what's been done historically.

GeorgeK
10-21-2011, 12:19 AM
Historically speaking, people also boiled water to sanitize it and one of the best ways for them to drink it was by adding tea. If we keep running with the historical bits, we lose some of what makes the races involved magical. That bit of information is nice to have, but it can limit the amount of creativity a person has if strictly going by what's been done historically.

So, you're saying that having a perfectly plausible and historically consistent reason to do something that is different from today's motivation is...no fun?

Boiling a large quantity of fresh water aboard a marine vessel poses additional challenges. Are you saying that tea is somehow sanitizing or just the boiling?

Elise-K-Ra'sha
10-21-2011, 11:38 PM
So, you're saying that having a perfectly plausible and historically consistent reason to do something that is different from today's motivation is...no fun?

Boiling a large quantity of fresh water aboard a marine vessel poses additional challenges. Are you saying that tea is somehow sanitizing or just the boiling?

I'm saying a lot of things have been done historically speaking. Corn farmers turned their products into liquor in order to sell it before the crops withered and died. Water was boiled for drinking. Monkeys have made wine by hiding fruits in the trunks of trees.

Historical can be fun, but if one takes it too far, it loses its appeal. And what has worked for one species (humans), it may not be so for mythical species (like the Elves).

elflands2ndcousin
10-22-2011, 03:13 AM
I'd have to say orc liquor. Mainly because I imagine they could (and would) drink much stronger stuff than the other species. They'd probably try and drink drain cleaner if they had it available.

sassandgroove
10-22-2011, 04:36 AM
Mr. Groove says Eleves don't make liquor, they make wine and mead.Now Elven wine will knock you on your ass. Dwarves are beer or ale. Halflings too. He doesn't know what the hell Orcs drink, turpentine maybe.

JimmyB27
10-22-2011, 11:32 PM
He doesn't know what the hell Orcs drink, turpentine maybe.
Orcs drink the blood of their enemies.

TheRob1
10-23-2011, 12:18 AM
I've been thinking that in a fantasy environment the agricultural limitations for races like the dwarves may be different. There may be vast caverns many acres across to provide plenty of farmland for the brewing grain or hops or other ingredients. There is still the problem of sunlight, which is required for plants to grow, but there may be some magical means to produce it. Perhaps dwarven wizards enchanted the roofs of those same caverns w/ giant "sun stones" to produce the light necessary for the crops to grow.

There might also be magical plants that ferment stronger.

Ryan K
10-23-2011, 04:10 AM
Dwarf, but before I go into why, I should first explain why orcs would be rather hopeless in a pub.

Fermentation, especially when knocking up some real top-notch plonk, is a finicky affair, equal parts science and art, requiring attention to detail, patience and perseverence. Orcs are (in)famous for many things, but sadly (or gladly) they just aren't cut out for making, designing, maintaining and operating a good working order distillery. So, not only would they be hopeless brewers, they would actually be hopeless drinkers. Without having experience, save for whatever they pillage along the way, I would expect that it would only take a few nips of gin before the average orc attempts to sing along to New York, New York before they felt sleepy and throw up in their purse.

On the other hand, dwarves would be brilliant at it. Their awful mistakes would be comparable to our top-shelf stuff. They are masterful at all things crafty, requiring precision, and demanding focused attention to detail. They don't mind waiting a few decades to see how some experiments turn out, and if those crazy short-lived humans pay buckets to buy barrels, who are they to complain?

seeker_nomad
10-24-2011, 08:37 AM
Don't you roll a constitution check to see if you get drunk? And half-orcs get large constitution bonuses (or at least they did long, long ago when I played D&D.)
Also, they wouldn't bother with nambly-pambly nonsense like "flavor" or "health and safety".

Elise-K-Ra'sha
10-24-2011, 09:31 PM
Don't you roll a constitution check to see if you get drunk? And half-orcs get large constitution bonuses (or at least they did long, long ago when I played D&D.)
Also, they wouldn't bother with nambly-pambly nonsense like "flavor" or "health and safety".

That only applies with table-top role-playing, to my knowledge. I don't know about most video games as the ones I play, no one tends to drink alcoholic beverages. If they do, it's shown as a moment here and a moment there without anyone really getting drunk. For online RPGs, I'd have to ask my younger brother on how that works. He's played WoW and the new Dungeons and Dragons online thing.

As for writing, I'm sure if an author wanted to go that route for writing how drunk an individual gets, the author could. It would entirely be up to the author's discretion. However, that would have some serious drawbacks. For example, say you're writing a scene where an Elf, a Dwarf, and a Human are sitting in a tavern, and they're drinking. Not some pansy ale, but something like dwarf spirits (the kind found in the Dragonlance novels). If you're using dice to determine who gets drunk quicker and it ultimately shows that the Dwarf and Elf are losing to the Human, no one would believe it. However, I believe it would be best to figure out which race would make the better brew - be it wine, spirits, ale, etc . . . - as compared to the other races in order to determine who of the other species could handle it the best.

JimmyB27
10-24-2011, 09:45 PM
An Elf, a Dwarf, and a Human are sitting in a tavern...
Sounds like the beginning of a joke. ;)

RichardFlea
10-25-2011, 02:46 AM
Are Russian Grandfathers human (or are we only talking fantasy humans here)? You know, the ones that are 4 foot nothing and who are married to woman whose skin looks like a walnut and can carry a ton of firewood on their back. They can brew this stuff that you can run a tank on, a Russian tank at that, and they won the war with those things. I think it is also used as an industrial paint stripper.

Anyway, they drink a litre of this stuff with their coco-pops for breakfast, and that is just to wake up.

So my order is Russian Grandfathers, Orcs, dwarves, etc.... then humans.

Maybe Russian Grandfathers are actually mini orcs.... that explains alot. :)

Shadow_Ferret
10-25-2011, 07:17 AM
I went with human. The rest are all imaginary.

Ryan K
10-25-2011, 09:06 AM
I went with human. The rest are all imaginary.

Oh, you're no fun.

Elise-K-Ra'sha
10-25-2011, 07:20 PM
I went with human. The rest are all imaginary.

So? That's the entire point. ;) If I wanted to know in real life who makes the strongest of alcoholic beverages, I'd have put nationalities in the poll instead of the imaginary races.

MoLoLu
10-25-2011, 11:33 PM
Other: Undead liquor - gotta be strong if it goes past mortal death and makes 'em go all woozy

JimmyB27
10-26-2011, 03:55 AM
Other: Undead liquor - gotta be strong if it goes past mortal death and makes 'em go all woozy
Ooh - I didn't notice the 'Other' option.

What about dragon alcohol? Look what it does to their breath!

MoLoLu
10-26-2011, 01:11 PM
Ooh - I didn't notice the 'Other' option.

What about dragon alcohol? Look what it does to their breath!

Now that would make a really cool gimmick!

Snitchcat
10-26-2011, 06:39 PM
Other.

There are nastier, tougher and more evil creatures than just the staple races in fantasy. I have a race that don't drink per se, but can brew lethal concoctions that would melt the sun. :D

caspermac
10-26-2011, 07:28 PM
I'd vote orc-liquor because in my head I imagine dwarves, humans & halflings to be beer and whiskey drinkers whereas I imagine Orcs to drink the nastiest crudest vodka-like alcohol imaginable.
The sort that they would smash over each others heads and set alight in a 'who can stay on fire the longest?' type competition.

Elise-K-Ra'sha
10-26-2011, 07:45 PM
I thought of adding dragon liquor to the list, but then decided I'd add the "other" option while sticking with the staple of fantasy races. I know that there are other races in the fantasy world, all creations of the authors writing the books.

This has been very fun.